>be amerifat >open bag of chips with scissors

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>put oven mitts in freezer

>be leaf
>try to fuck moose
>dick freezes

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>>1132410
>be american
>get shot

>>1132410
>be burger
>can't into banter because I struggle from my limited knowledge of vocabulary
>get a heart attack from the stress
>ambulance picks me up
>stops by McDonald's for my 100 McNuggets, 20 large fries, and 15 cups of Diet Coke because I'm watching my weight
>go to Schlomo Shekelstein Medical Hospitsl
>$7,900,000 bill with $9,000 mandatory tip
>get another heart attack
>get shot
>die

>>1132272
>be amerifat

Stopped reading right there

>be Mexican

>gets dubs

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>>1132500
nice

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>>1132500
checked

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>drink 2 liter bottles with one hand

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>>1132272
>be canuck
>dont matter to the rest of the world
>live in arctic trash can
>talk like fucking retards
>learn "au revoir" and pretend you can speak french
>pussy military
>no advancements in science, other than the last .0001% left after americas work
>healthcare worse than americas but its free right!?
>98% white people but still say "we're so diverse!"

>>1132500
sick

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>>1132480
>be saudi
>get shot while walking from mudhut
>no doctors because monkey population too dumb for medical school, or got killed in a suicide bombing
>fuck goat to help feel better
>put on dress and towel
>get right hand cut off for having old grape juice that turned into wine
>forgot to pray to mecca
>beheaded because daughter let her ankle show while she was getting gangraped by your 8 brothers

>>1132544
>98% white people
be amerifat think this is a problem

>be shot
>get american

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>be me, american
>wish other people a long lasting and fulfilling life

>>1132272
>be canuck
>not even a human being

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>>1132662
>be me, Canadian
>wish you a long lasting and fulfilling life

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>be canadian
>try to open bottle of chips

>be can't-nada
>buy bagged milk
HOW EMBARASSING