I've been married for only several months and have a 9 week old baby with my wife. We've been together for about 3 years now.
But today after her usual complaining and bitching I finally snapped and told her off and that if she keeps complaining and bitching for nothing when I do everything for her and all she does for me is give me sex to satisfy me. She gets paid by her government just for having the baby. She didn't live a shitty life like I did and she was a sheltered Christian. I told her that if she keeps this up I don't see a future with her and I basically called her usesss and all she cares about is money and not my love and blah blah. She started crying and is angry with me and has our daughter in our room and I'm sitting on the couch.
I love her and I want our daughter to have the both of us together to have a mom and dad but I can't take it anymore with her complaining and never being happy with what I do for her and sacrifice my happiness to make her happy. She can't appreciate it.
>>739104643 She complains about that the house we live in (with my dad) is too small and that we will never do better in life and we will live with him forever. And she complains about all of her appliances we have she doesn't like. Within her costing her for month so far my father and I have bought her a $500 vacuum. A $300 juicer. A $1,200 refrigerator. I buy food daily from around east bay because it's what she wants at THAT time. She bitches because she wants a snack at 12am that makes me leave our room and I say I'm tired and why can't she do it. She complains that my car is too small and not comfortable (2003 Honda Accord) and she wants a Ford Edge (2017) for her and she doesn't even have a license yet and she's 24. She complains that I don't explore anywhere enough when I drive with her every damn day just to drive and waste the money on gas while I'm looking for another job at a shit agency for HVAC/ R. Just so many things to list.
>>739105056 Can't yet as she's not a citizen or on a green card yet. But she gets paid 1200 euro from Austria every month for being a mom.
And she complains that I'm lazy when all she does is sit in the back of our car eating food and drinking and going every day where she wants to go and never asks me what I want to do. She doesn't have to lift a finger for anything but to take care of our daughter and I do the heavier lifting for that too. When it comes to moving our daughter in and out of the car I put our daughter in her seat and I put the stroller in the trunk so all my wife has to do is sit in her sit and buckle our daughter up while I put the stroller in the back.
I've also sacrificed my hobbies and I've been trying to sell my desktop to make more space in our room for things we need and a bigger bed. I've given up my dream and stopped going to college and paid $14k for HVAC training at a school (out of pocket) to have a job and money sooner. But she doesn't care and only cares about her dreams.
>>739105155 postpartum depression isn't that common after having a child you pretentious cuck, this has obviously been going on for a while. Too bad you married this ungrateful mess of a woman. Put her in her fucking place aren't you a man? Be assertive Jesus Christ
>>739105155 Her depression is bullshit because I am the one that is losing everything that I wanted. All she has to do is tell me she wants something and I 98% do it for her and buy it because she throws a fit. She basically drinks a mc shake almost daily and when I tell her it's not healthy she gets angry and says to convert her money to dollar and it's bullshit that I won't buy it for her and I can't control her with money.
Since the start of the relationship I did everything for her and put her first before myself. At the beginning of our relationship she was in 4,000 euro in debt with her bank. I paid for that shit and got her out of debt. I bought her whatever she wanted and even now when I'm at $1,200 (vs the $18,000) before our relationship, I still buy her what she wants because she throws a fit like a fucking child if I don't and starts to compare me to her female cousin who has a pilot as a fiance and that they have nice things and they are always traveling and that I don't do those things.
>>739106270 At this point I think I'd be happier divorced and have time for my hobbies again for deving and learning. Plus I'm a pretty decent looking guy and I've never had a problem with having girls after me and I'd just like to fuck different girls than keep a relationship. My wife basically killed that happy idea for me.
>>739105878 Shes bored out if her mind. Shes not fuckin arnold swatsanager types in austria the kid destroyd her pussy. Shes that cat that has caught the string. Send her to a bingo parlor or better yet buy an xbox, and tell her you want to buy her a class course for pharmacy technition and send her out of the house
>>739104181 sounds like youve been treating her like a child and now she is just fulfilling the role. All of this is because of a positive feedback loop provided by you. you have to stop doing shit for her.
Make a stand. If you spoil her then she'll just get worse. She might actually be jealous of the baby and is acting out, like you would expect an older child to do when a new baby comes along. The baby gets everything so she wants everything, too. If she was always like that then you fucked up on a whole other level.
>>739106661 That's why I made this thread now is because I did put my foot down. We went to ikea because SHE wanted to go. And as soon as we went inside she did the bitching thing with a stupid as fuck irritating voice that she won't ever have nice things and that she will live with me and my dad forever and that the house we have is too small to have anything nice inside. And this basically half turned a switched on me. But I kept my calm and tried to walk away from her to not hear more from it. And she walked way from me pissed off because i walked away from her. So I walked to the mattress section to see what they have because my wife has been bitching all month that she hates my memory foam mattress because it's not comfortable (bullshit) and that it's not big enough. And I talked to her and I said it's fair enough that's it's small because I bought it to have more room to walk and put dressers in the room. I found a bed and went to try to find her. And when I finally found her and explained to come look at a bed she bitched more and said she wants to leave. And basically when we went to our car I told her off and that I don't see a future with her.
>>739105149 All of this bitching started only after marrying, or did she bitched and moan ever since you starte dating? If this started way back then, then I don't see why you stayed with her, or at the very least told her off then.
>>739104181 I complain and be bitchy to my partner about a lot of things. thats what us woman do sometimes when we dont get what we want, we want the big house and some want a big family. we complain till we get what we want. i do it all the time when i want another pet. i have like other 10 pets and i want more.
>>739106955 She's not a gold digger. I know how this thread looks and it appears like that but she isn't. But she's used to having a good house and having nice things in the house because her parents worked their asses off for her and her siblings and she doesn't know what being humble is. She never lived a poor life like I did.
>>739107012 At the start of the relationship I was very calm and understanding and let her have her space and never talked with a higher voice. But after living with it nearly daily I'm at this point to where I'm ready to snap every time she complains. And she made me like this and I'm always ready to punch something. So now I yell at her because she isn't being nice to me or understanding to me and always sees what benefits her or what she wants.
>>739107089 I didn't treat her like a child and I didn't give her a role to fill. I gave her my love and a good life with a good relationship. That no one else has ever given her or would have.
Bruz it sounds like she is severely depressed, Depression doesn't always look like crying and cutting.
That said it's an explanation not an excuse, you do not sound well from these posts, you sound stressed and depressed yourself. I'm divorcing my wife atm because of similar issues (No kids thankfully) but the stuff you are writing could have been me a few months ago.
You may even be suffering from something called compassion fatigue, it's basically the concept that compassion is a finite resource, you only have so much of it and you need to spend quite a bit of that on yourself to be OK.
I'd say talk to a counselor, I'm not sure what country you are in but a lot of them have support networks you can employ to mitigate the cost. The once you've had a few sessions with them to get your head straight talk with her.
Worst case you'll wind up where I am and file for divorce. It sucks but you can't live your life for another person, no matter how much you love them. If you try then you'll end up killing yourself and then you can't help anyone.
>>739106349 Honestly leave my girl winges and complains but after I tell her off and tell her to open her fucking eyes she hugs me a says I'm sorry for being a bitch and that she loves me like your girl is using you me and my girl live in tiny caravan I work at McDonalds she study's I always tell her I'm sorry that I can't give her everything she wants but she never cares never complains because a relationship isn't 1 person carrying the other its about supporting each other she gives me loves and cleans for me I work my ass off and buy her everything I can (on a completely different note I have pretty bad depression and my girl never gets mad at me or sick of me she helps me through it and comes to my counselling and learns the techniques to help me cope so I think before you end it with her (which is very obvious you need to do) try and help her and see if she can be helped dont give her anything she wants IDC if she has a tantrum she's a girl what's she gunna do if she has a tantrum take your baby and sit in a room away from her and play with your kid until she's done make it very obvious you dont care if she has a tantrum
anon, postpartum depression can be real. Who knows what the future holds but at this point in time, 9 weeks after having a baby, it's certainly possible. Now is not the time to make big decisions about change.
Ok, that said, I suggest you do not contribute to the arguing. I'm not saying agree with her or do whatever she wants, but don't get into an argument.
If she starts complaining, do not continue the discussion. "You've told me before you don't like the car, but we don't have the money right now to do anything different." If she continues to complain, repeat it as many times as needed until she understands you hear what she's saying, but you aren't going to argue about it.
"You've told me before you don't like where we live, but we can't change until I finish school and get a better-paying job."
I would give in on the midnight snack, that's pretty painless. And you don't want to make it look like you're going to say no to everything.
Do not give in when she throws a fit because you're reinforcing that behavior.
"I'm sorry, I'm not going to discuss that until you can talk in a normal voice without yelling."
Believe me, when only one person in an argument is screaming, they tend to stop pretty quickly because they subconsciously realize how stupid they sound. Stay calm, but speak what's on your mind.
>>739108394 >I gave her my love and a good life with a good relationship. That no one else has ever given her or would have. Maybe that's the reason no-one else ever gave her those things. Because she acts like a spoiled, entitled child.
>>739108269 i have like 4 dogs, 2 cats, 1 snake, 2 rabbits and a hamster and im hoping to get another snake and more dogs. haha i love animals. i adopted the dogs. and nah the space in the flat is actually okay, and the garden is fine.
>>739107281 Take custody of your daughter your wife can't even get a house in u.s the court will never give her custody....then be a good dad u dont need both parents to be happy especially if you kept going on with wife and flipped 1 day and murdered her it'd be worse
>>739104181 OP you need to learn seduction. go on the red pill on reddit, scour seduction forums, lurk lurk lurk.
You do have to wade through a lot of shit that is just plain lies, psycho-ness, and dis-illusionment BUT there is a lot of solid advice about the female mind, keeping women happy (the right way), and rising above these problems.
Basically, you have to stop supplicating to her - you going an extra mile to make sure your little wife is happy is not actually making her happy she see's you as weak. You need to get your shit together
>>739107859 She came into the relationship knowing who I am and what I had. She wanted me for who I was and not what I had.
>>739108091 At the start she didn't bitch and was some what humble or at least understanding. But as time goes on she isn't patient and wants what she wants within a snap of a finger and if it doesn't happen then she says her future will be shit.
>>739108144 Then you will drive your partner away because a person can only take so much and you will be the one crying.
And every time that we get into a fight she always says, "I CAN FEEL THAT YOU WILL CHEAT ON ME IN THE FUTURE" and it's at this point that she keeps saying it over and over that when I masturbate in the shower because of no sex days I imagine her sister or people she hates of me fucking then to make her angry. And I can feel that when we out shopping I am starting to not care about controlling myself watching other women or looking at heir asses. Yesterday while shopping at the mall a girl from Romania was flirting with me and my wife was watching from afar and I had the temptation to keep flirting with her and get her number but then I stopped and pointed at my wife to make the girl stop flirting. But even then she didn't stop she even asked me if me and my wife have a child, which I take it as she would see if I would cheat on my wife but as soon as I said I do her face changed and she tried to end the conversation.
>>739105155 Amen. it will pass. My wife was straight up psychotic and making up shit about me during that time. Be careful what you say and how you say it. Also, record her when she is having fits (if she is), so she can see what she is like. It may convince her to get some help.
OP listen to the black phillip show with patrice oneal from opie and anthony show. Its all on youtube and it discusses every aspect about women and relationships you can think of. Patrice is funny as fuck to.
>>739104181 Do a good ol family an hero Tie em all up in bed, nuzzle up with em n drop a match. Burrrrrrrrrn emmmm be together forever mommy daddy family burning forever in cocksucking hell hhahahahhaaa
>>739105756 100x this. Stop re-inforcing bad behaviour! Put your foot down! >>739106349 This anon has a point she might be a gold digger. Sounds like she is seriously playing you. >>739107089 Well said again. I think you do treat her like a child, you seem to just let things slide like she doesn't know any better. Of course she does, stop letting her get away with this bullshit
>>739110565 I second this, was about to post the same advice. Couple of tips though, Patrice has some obvious self image issues and he is basically describing how pimping works, but it does have some great psychological truths in there.
>>739109449 Anon, I am in the exact situation but not marries, 8 month old daughter, spoiled brazilian whose mom busted her ass here to accomadate her kids but they didn't learn to work a hard day in their life and still don't, let alone clean and cook contrary to what most believe. She started acting extremely manic and psychotic using our child as leverage. I'm a blue collar hard working guy, not rich, not poor - doing well. Her only responsibility is to watch out daughter so we don't pay for a sitter. She does not contribute one cent, or lift one finger around the house but is entitled to say whatever she wants about what we do or don't have, what she wants, and EVERYTHING is superficial. I came from nothing and sharing a room with my sister growing up and am further along than most of my 28 year old friends (she's 24 also). I have had to call her family and have her removed from the house and get so nutty till I suggested and paid for counseling. Turns out 8 months later and she still has pod. It is real, however, she did not have ppd before we had a child and I have a pretty good idea of knowing what's bullshit and what is certified cuck worthy. Recently put my foot down hard and she's too nervous to go to court based off of what we have gone through in therapy and what the therapist suggested to mend things and help with the ppd. Do yourself a favor and suggest therapy and pay for it. Document the things she says via text when she is getting crazy. Start creating a paper trail of what you do and contribute and do to.accommodate the situation. If and when it does get to the custody/divorce point YOU WILL LOSE. prepare yourself for that. Keep doing what you can and fight for your daughter, don't fight with her mother. Play it cool and smart. It is the worst thing you will ever go through or endure but until reality starts smacking her in the face she will not change. Post pardum is not spoiled ungrateful bitch girlfriend. You know the difference and how she was
>Married 2 years. 6 month old baby. >never used to fight at all now we get on each other nerves and bitch over
might sound like weird advice to hear from another guy but what solved it for me is that listening to her.
U can't just buy things to make her happy. Women just want to be heard. Something is bugging her as much as this is bugging her. Go figure out what it is and have a meaningful conversation with your wife about how to constructively deal with ur guys' respective concerns.
I disagree. Gold diggers would likely go for someone wealthier and ask for bags instead of house hold items no?
I think instead of buying more stuff to clean with, use the money and hire a maid to help out 3 hours a week just to clean. Use those 3 hours to go work on your relationship with ur wife and get back on better ters.
>>739111344 Sometimes being heard and being made a bitch when you're the one carrying the team and providing (yes I know it's a team but let's be real here) isn't worth listening. Pick and choose your battles sure, but there are some girls out there that are the reason why you're told "don't stick your dick in crazy"
>>739105567 Oldfag here anon, you've become a man congratulations. The penny has dropped you've finally realised it >when girls become young attached ladies >sometimes as soon as the ring is on her finger >other times when they become a mother The sex crazed nympho, that would fuck you anywhere anytime, was cool to be with. Always up for travelling somewhere. Had a great figure, wore tight fitting clothes. Has become a cunt in every way. They're miserable moaning selfish bitches, they only half care for their appearance put on weight. Don't fuck you, call you disgusting for wanting to stick it in her ass. Yet used to demand you stuck it in there when she was younger. Become world champion at selfishness. Yes anon they're all the same, all women are selfish bastards. Leave the fucking bitch she'll never change. Just use women for when you want to and treat them like shit. It's what they deserve.
>>739111581 So she actively wants to be miserable the rest of her life with a serious disease (hypotyroidism) rather than just take a simple blood test? Did she change after the birth and became (more) lethargic, irritable, emotionally cold, changes in appetite, etc?
>>739104181 You fell for the marriage meme. Forcing yourself to stay in an unhappy marriage just for the sake of your daughter will lead to troubles down the road. If you are still together by the time she is old enough you two may well be too bitter to provide a loving home. Id suggest leaving. She is still an infant, she will adjust to have a single parent home if you choose to leave her. Half your stuff is hers though. Divorce and leave half your shit or stay in an unhappy marriage which will cause you more troubles and lose half your shit anyway when she leaves. Those are your options(besides sitting down like grown adults and talking shit out).
>>739111903 Yes. A lot of it is just bit grasping reality and knowing what it takes to survive in the real world. No dad, daddy issues. Any enforcement suggestion or conversation in the least authoritative manor and she is off the walls. It's single parent millennial delusion honestly. From a hard working immigrant mother who just wanted to take care of her kids and fucked them up in the process. They never been on their own, had to pay bills, had to work just to afford every day commitments with no repercussion. It's just not wanting to grow the fuck up honestly, spoiled bitches.
OP you married a spoiled brat. She's a child emotionally and she will always fight you to get her way because she probably did the same thing with her dad and it worked and is now working on you. She thinks a mans role is to take care of her and she is a princess. She's never gonna learn how to be a responsible adult unless she's stuck defending for herself without support.
OP I'm afraid you can't win this battle. Divorce might be best option.
>>739104181 Talk to a therapist. You probably should not be in your marriage if you treat your wife this way, but you have a daughter, so that complicates things. You knew what she was like when you married her. This is why you say "for better or worse" in your vows. It's your job to turn the worse into better, not hers.
>>739104181 Well fag... the problem is, is that you got with someone who has different mentality of life and working. She's got everything she wanted by a silver platter because of where she is from. She doesn't compare to how you came up in the world. My parents were exactly the same in life styles sept my mom lived on a farm and my dad was from the ghetto. Both had to work hard and got married. An never ever ever cheated on eachother or divorced. Had some fights but no divorce
In this conclusion faggot. She's most likely want to just leave you for a richer man. Go find yourself a thicc Filipino woman. They're sweet and belief in Long lasting love I gues... fag
>>739105878 And you are the one doing it and then complaining to a bunch of 19 year old retards. Set some boundaries. Highly recomend you check out the book "Boundaries" by Townsend and Cloud. When you finish it, check out "Boundaries in Marriage."
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