How do I stop giving a shit about what people say and think?

"If you can handle being talked about, then you're ready for success". It's different for everyone but usually it comes with experience.

>>736403560
Rea or watch a few videos on "ego", "ego death", or "ego dissolution", and you'll probably find what you're looking for, considering that you are actually looking for answers to real problems, and not just excuses for shitty behavior.

>>736404122
>be above average intelligence teenager
>spend a lot of time trying to disarm my own ego
>succeed at it
>women and people don't like me anymore because i don't think highly enough of myself

i don't really get people. they don't want a middle ground even though they complain about the extremes.

>>736403560
Theres actually a pill you can take that lets you feel morally superior while still being a lazy shit that didn't earn anything.

It's called xanax. Just doctor shop until you find it. good luck op

>>736404207
Ego control and self respect aren't mutually exclusive, don't ever confuse harmlessness with morality mate. You're only a teen so keep working on it.

>>736404122
>stop being a cunt

are you sure there isn't like, a really quick way that you don't have to learn anything for?

>>736404122
Is this actually possible? I want to be able to completely reshape my way of thinking. It's stupid to the point where someone in real life could call me a cunt and it'll bug me for a week.

>>736404207
You're lying.

First, you can't completely kill your ego, unless you take an absolute vow of silence.

Second, people didn't "stop liking you", they moved on because they never liked you in the first place.

There's a big difference between being aware of the problems caused by the ego, and blaming this awareness for your lack of discipline.

>>736404386
That goes into the "not having a real problem" category.

>>736403560
Find other things to concentrate on.

No wait. Mushrooms. Sorry.

>>736404441
Good post.

>>736404421
I don't think you really want to do it, simply because you asking this question.

You would easily know how to change your own mind if you were actually interested in exploring your own mind in the first place, but I don't think this is what you are looking for, exactly. Not now, and not at this moment, at least.

>>736404613
At this point I'm willing to try anything to fix it. I'm tired of dwelling on little things people say about me. I've tried changing it myself but can't.

>>736404613
>>736404720
Well at least he thought about it which is the first step? So now it's in your hands to continue working on it I guess...

>>736404720
You are a whiny crybaby.
>>736405117
Whatever drugs you're on, share

>>736405211
I know, hence why I'm asking for tips to change this you cunt

>>736405398
I found listening to Jordan B Petersons lectures very useful, there is surely something you will find useful too.

>>736403560
It is a meme indeed. What others think of you is really important and quite determinant of your possible outcomes. It can get to a point in which the image they have of you is so low that the best you can do is just go away and start over with new people. This meme was just created so unpopular kids don't kill themselves during HS.

All that said, the only evaluations that matter are those which come from 'higher class' people.

>>736405398
>I know everything you're telling me

No you don't. Thinking you do is what's making you sit there and say you "can't" because you've "tried everything". If that was true you would already be killing yourself.

Here's a tip you won't take: Next time someone calls you a whiny crybaby, try saying something like "why do you think that?", "instead of ahhh I already know everything but somehow I can't fix anything ahhh".

It takes a little effort but gets easier with practice.

>>736405686
based

for every (you) i get, i'll go a day without masturbating

>>736404720
>I've tried changing it myself but can't.
You can't change other people, but once you realize you don't necessarily have to be the "yourself" you see in them, or at least that you don't need to force the image you have of yourself onto others, maybe you'll understand that what they think comes from what you are, and not what you think you are, and what you think you "are" isn't anything concrete.

Unless you understand the sentence "you are nothing" without feeling defensive, and unless you realize that there's someone else getting angry at the world, who isn't necessarily "you", but the ego, you'll struggle to let perceived "treats" to just bounce-off. You need to be able to access this information for it to guide what needs to be changed in your behavior, so you can stop your own ego from clashing onto every other unrestrained ego around you, and that definitely isn't something many people are even aware is possible, or are willing to go through.

Think of the ego like this: You probably see yourself as a "separate" entity from the rest of the world, right? This separate entity is the ego, and the rest of the world is the rest of the world. The "real you" is a mere observer who is hiding "behind", or "within", or "under" the ego, and the ego is the "shell" that you use as a bridge between the "real you" and the rest of the world. Your goal is to understand "the ego" is actually part of the world, not part of the "real self". Why? Because the "real self", isn't really a thing.

>>736406514
I think I just got pseudo philosophical cancer.

>>736406514
First time ever posting here, had to say thanks for that

>>736403560
Ive taken so muchmushrooms and acid that I realize none of this matters but in a good way.
If you really want to not care.about what people think you have to realize in just 60 years none of this matters. Its really easy to get sucked into a world where you think every little thing is important and who your friends with and what people think of you is of absolutlr importance and priority.
Truth is youll lose contact with friends and make new ones. Youll probably never talk to these people again after thid chapter in your life. People inherently are pretty shitty creatures, never expect much from them. And than you die.

Gl anon.

>>736406624
>>736406730
Both of you are gay.

>>736406800
>just lobotomize yourself
>than

Fucking degenerate

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>>736406965
You got that right

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>>736403560
Smoke (vaporize technically) a breakthrough dose of DMT or do 5g of shrooms in silent darkness or do some Ayahuasca or perhaps even some Ibogaine. Maybe do all of them and if you're really hardcore all at the same time, but that would probably be a bit too much for you to handle haha.

>>736403560
if you're still here OP maybe studying some philosophy and getting older would help, just start including yourself in banter and take it as a joke when they call you something like a "fat shit" or something

>>736407787
I actually have a whole jar of that shit that starts with A that you said. Nervous to try it without a shaman.

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>>736403560
The problem goes deeper than not giving a shit.
You have to work on your confidence and be more sure about what you want to do and be happy doing it. It's not simple.
In short you can't stop giving a shit if you give a shit.

>>736403560
Yes, simply do things your way and when people tell you to do things their way tell them to fuck off.

Feel no obligation, fear no repercussions.

Be your own man OP, god speed.

>>736406338
This, stop saying you can't stop thinking about what if and "oh he said that about me" and just fucking send it. If someone calls you a whiny cry baby tell them to go fuck themselves.

I think the important part of my problem is that I wasn't always like this. I used to be able to take the banter and dish it out also. Currently incapable of doing it now.

I don't think anything specific happened that changed it. It just sort of did.

Also, how will drugs stop me from being a bitch?

What other people think of me is none of my business. Quit being a thermometer and try being a thermostat.

>>736406514
Good message, bad delivery, work on being more concise.

>>736403560
https://youtu.be/17kGWHLg3wU

>>736408683
>this
>gives exact opposite advice

well jewed

>>736408737
It's not "drugs", psychedelics aren't like cocaine at all. They're completely different things.

If you can't brute force your way through the philosophy, mushrooms are an easy way for you to "get it", without necessarily having to read anything.

>>736409008
>if you aren't smart enough to assimilate your surroundings drugs are a great way to become apathetic

Not even mad, completely true.

>>736409008
I'm interested. I guess the next step is how to get them. I live in England, any tips?

>>736409213
organic cattle farms. run useless faggot, run!!

>>736409008
Taking mushrooms help you understand Sophocles and shit? Coming to a deluded conclusion of some large area of your life is not philosophy. That's some tribal BS you're going on about.

>>736406514
are you citing spinozas ideas?

>>736409316
but anon if it makes you feel better why question it? You can always glue your dick back on later

>>736408737
You just got tired of being fake dude. That banter bullshit is tiresome as fuck. I have to do it in my job and it literally wears me out more than hauling shingles.

Like I thought we'd outgrow that shit in high school. I feel like I cant say 2 words without someone making a joke at my expense and its not that I cant take the joke or that I get butthurt its that I feel like nothing being said is being taken seriously and so why talk at all? I end up staying silent a lot.

Not to say I dont have confidence or something I have true real confidence the kind that comes from having an ability and being able to showcase it and garner adulation from people passing by.

The problem as I see it is what you are worried about is being worried if people see the real you because of perceived judgement. My advice is act in a way that there can be no question as to your worth whilst remaining humble socially (sounds like that may come easy).

And one last thing, always know the worst thing your enemies (or friends if thats what you'd like to call them) could ever say to you. Cause then they cant use it against you.

>>736404421
smoke weed

>>736409451
>be the person you want others to think you are

Are you sure there isn't just a drug?

Look, you either do or you don't. Most people run around saying they don't care what people think of them but if you really don't care, you wouldn't even take time to post that. Basically you are either born with the capacity to not give a shit or not.

>>736409549
I'm sorry that things are hard. You can write about it in your diary at the end of the day.

>>736409589
you can become used to not caring though. just have to hit a rough patch in your life.

>>736404720
It hurts, and youre not going to stop that, but gets easier when you realize how fucked up people in general can be. Just move on to something that's more interesting to you.

>>736409213
I recommend you people to read onto this stuff. I'm really not at all qualified to give out instructions or lectures over this subject. It's way bigger than what I can write down, and people have been doing it infinitely better than me for a very long time.

If you're really interested, you should either watch someone on youtube, or get some information from people who are more responsible and informed than I am over the web.

>>736409549

There's lots of drugs -- the one I find most effective at removing my care of what others think of me is crippling depression and suicidal ideations. Shits a trip, give it a go

>>736403560
For me, it was about realizing that by far the largest group of people in your life don't and can't substantially influence your life. Thefore it would be silly to care about what they think about anything, let alone about you.

Try to be kind to whoever possible, and at least be professional. Don't gossip or start shit, be brief and clear about your intention when it's not required to not be. Handle conflicts maturally.

That way you don't ever get drama, and your life will be as stale as uncooked pasta.

>>736409408
If it makes you feel better when your reality is shitty, it's a self-induced lie. Medicating ones self with a mind altering substance to pull away from average human experiences is a bad thing. Taking substances out of experimentation for recreational purposes isn't what I would call bad, but playing doctor is a bad move. Honestly if you would like to "not give a shit" try some Opanas, Roxys, Oxys, Loritabs. You'll be hooked on heroin in a year or two and you'll learn the impacts of "not giving a shit" real fast.

>>736403560
it comes naturally by being an alpha. sorry op.

>>736409316
Maybe you're right, but taking mushrooms is a great way for you to open your mind and explore ideas you wouldn't be able to even grasp before.

I don't see it as a magical solution, but the beginning of a process.

>>736403560
Build confidence in yourself. You care because you doubt yourself.

>>736409800
>>736409866
Both of you are ok.

>>736409589
dumbest thing I ever heard

>>736409959
>maybe you're right but I still don't really care

Find a local farm yet OP?

>>736409589
I work at a unit that deals with suicidal and substance-addicted individuals. I have to give a shit to be good at my job, but giving too much of a shit is a horrible thing. If I end up taking too much emotional baggage home, I'll be in the same boat as the people in treating.

>>736410171
I'm going to believe you and thank you for doing that. A drowning man rarely knows whats best for themselves. The best way to care is by telling them where the boat is without yourself getting in the water. They will kick and scream at you for simply not saving them. You will feel guilty because they are in pain. But if you don't force them to swim all you do is enable them. They may smile and thank you in the short run, but don't get lulled into thinking that is help.

It is hard to go home without baggage. But you can only help a victim if you don't follow them down the rabbit hole.

>>736410612
To add to that metaphor: they're already anchored by their disease and I am in a submarine. Opening my door will simply make myself a victim to the environment as well. But I can still show them which way is up, and sometimes bump them forcibly to the surface.

>>736411082
No now its just retarded. Almost worse than know it all OP. People can't even take a fucking compliment without polishing their ego.