> be me > 23 > live in WI > have never left the state further than Chicago IL or Des Moine IA > booked my flight for my future bro in laws bachelor party > strippersandcocaine.jpeg > have never flown before > party is in less that 2 weeks > frantically looking around Google so Im prepared dont lose my spaghetti doing this
So a few questions first and any other advise would be great.
1) im trying to fly with pot(want to bring some with me and a brownie for the flight) also if i dont have a brownie how can I smoke on the flight if at all 2) will a regular sized backpack be fine for a carry on (flying SW) 3) generally anything that I should look out for
>>734486327 >1) im trying to fly with pot(want to bring some with me and a brownie for the flight) also if i dont have a brownie how can I smoke on the flight if at all Let the flight attendant know you want to blaze. Most are stoners themselves and will hook you up with a special safe spot to do so.
>2) will a regular sized backpack be fine for a carry on (flying SW) Absolutely.
>3) generally anything that I should look out for Southwest flights are full of cackling old ladies
>>734486327 Alright /b/ro, let me help you out. I'm an airline pilot, so i know a thing or two about flying. 1) Do NOT, under any circumstances, bring drugs, or anything illegal with you on the plane, or to the airport. There are drug dogs, and they will find your stuff. 2) A normal size backpack is fine, it won't be an issue. Don't bring any drinks or food with you, just suck it up, and buy at the airport, because TSA will fuck with you. 3) Make sure you look for gate changes, and try to pay attention to the PA announcements. If you're nervous about flying, don't be. I can assure you that it is an extremely safe way to travel, and all airliners can fly with only one engine. Because you're flying southwest, bring a book, or portable charger, as your plane will most likely not have any in-flight entertainment.
>>734489177 Prepare for the worst of humanity. SW passengers are on edge cause of the seating policy, no assigned seats ....so when the boarding starts people try and skip, employees try to stay out of it, it's a mess
>>734488934 I wouldn't risk it if I were you. If you absolutely insist, make sure that its wrapped scent proof, and tape it to your balls or something. Don't ever put it in your bag. They x-ray them, and if they see something off, they will search it. I've flown with captains who have thrown people off flights for looking baked, so there's that too.
It's not scary at all unless you get really bad turbulence. I had people crying in my airplane because we thought we were going down. Second worse is when I had sleep paralysis and also thought I was going down and heard screaming but it was all in my head.All in all not bad at all you might get somewhat spooked during takeoff/landing.
>>734489768 If you reject a full body scan they will pat you down so thoroughly it will 100% be found. I have only ever done it where I stick it up my ass and I don't think 99% of people want to smoke that badly.
>>734486327 1)I would advise not bringing it but I have flown with a vape pen that just looked like an ecig however as mentioned dogs can pick up on it and if security finds it (and knows what it is) you are FUCKED it is a federal crime considered trafficking a schedule 1 narcotic plus a laundry list of other shit they will throw at you. eat edibles before you enter the airport and then get some on the other side 2) I regularly fly with a backpack and call it my "personal bag" to avoid carry on fees (check carriers website) 3) Check in online and avoid checking bags use a E-ticket on your phone (crop to only the QR and turn your brightness up and lock the rotation) walk into the airport with pockets empty except phone and ID and everything else in your bag (no belt, jacket, sunglasses, anything you can't take through the scanners) and where flip flops if appropriate.
I have other advice if you want to know, basically I live on planes.
being high on the plane and smoking at the airport is no problem.
if you try to bring green on the plane though, you better know what the fuck you're playing with because getting arrested at an airport is NO JOKE
that being said
I have successfully brought a 8th with me by buying a pack of cigs, cutting the bottom off the cigs, putting the bud in the bottom of the box in a WELL SEALED BAG and then covering the bud with the shortened cigs
just looks like a pack of smokes. but you still better BURY IT IN A CHECKED BAG
>>734486327 If you're fat (and I assume you are), make sure you don't sit all the way down on the toilet seat when you flush. If you create a seal between your ass and the seat, the pressure from flushing will prolapse your anus instantly.
>>734489827 I can tell you that turbulence will never bring down a plane. Takeoff and landing may get a bit bumpy, but there is nothing to worry about. Turbulence on an airliner is nothing compared to the 172's Take it from someone with almost 15,000 hours in the air. If you want to be scared, look up microbursts. That shit gets real dangerous, real quick.
>>734490329 lol, i can understand why pax would be scared. The worst that i ever experienced was during IFR training, when we flew into a thunderstorm by accident (no Wx radar, and shitty ATC) and were having deviations of almost 1000 ft. Thats one time that I almost shit myself, not going to lie.
just fucking ship it to your destination vacuum seal bud, wash hands, table, change clothes, rub alcohol over it, move to a different room, vacuum seal once again, repeat wash, wrap in childrens birthday wrapping paper get prepaid cc go to usps keep head down ( but don't draw attention) use one of the boxes they have most stores have a automated kiosk for shipping use that ship to your hotel with a fake name use a residential address from your town (not yours) and a fake name as return wait til you get to your hotel then say you should have mail for fake name if they do not have it, drop it. it was confiscated enroute, don't draw attention to it.
>>734486327 DO NOT under any circumstances smoke weed on a plane. Jesus fuck just get that thought out of your head right meow unless you wanna get the shit beat out of you by 3 air marshals and 4 years of phonebooks
the "liquids" rule is really only for water bottles and bigger bring an empty reusable waterbottle instead (like yeti) and restaurants after security will fill it for free or they will fill it on the plane
you can bring snacks through security
if there are 2 of you flying book the aisle and window, people won't want to book the middle and if they do will be happy to switch
just ask, anything you want from the airline, just ask. this is actually good life advice. worst that can happen is they say no.
carry business cards that say GM for a nice restaurant (in your city or just a major one) pass them to flight attendants and tell them you can hook them up if they want to come in ( flight attendants are always in big cities but can rarely afford nice dinners) bam they will hook you up all flight
careful how much you drink altitude really does change how much you can drink
poo before you get to the airport pee before you get on the plane
noise canceling headphones and download listenables on your device (no service in the sky)
blow up neck pillow and soft jacket make for comfies in air (eye mask too if thats a problem for you)
when you get to your seat smile and say hello to your neighbors but then shut the fuck up and put on your headphones
>>734491732 To add on to this, NEVER drink anything on the plane that you didn't see come from a bottle or can. The water storage tanks on the a/c are nasty as fuck. Full of algae and shit. You will 100% get sick.
fine don't listen and get drunk as shit and possibly arrested because getting too drunk in a bar means they kick you out, getting too drunk on an airplane mean you face federal charges and air marshals who can literally do anything to you.
1) If you have legit anxiety and need the weed for just the plane rides, toke up beforehand on the way out. Don't do more than you would normally do when going out. For the trip back it's a little harder, but if you absolutely can't buy it there, do this:
Get a brand new bottle of a no-smell cooking oil like safflower. Put an ounce in a blender or food processor, and add about an eighth of some good shit in there and blend it up really fine. Let it air out for less than four hours, with a fan over it if possible, and then store it in your refrigerator.
Next get a 1 ounce bottles of a strong-smelling essential oil like peppermint or clove, something you can stand. Empty out 3/4 of it, and then take your pot oil in the cooler and spread it out on a cheesecloth. Get a syringe from a methadone clinic. Put the mixture in the syringe with a little bit of filter paper at the bottom, and squeeze that shit through the syringe into the bottle. The strong smell should throw off any doggos, bonus points if you dress like a whole foods dingus and keep the oil in a bag of vitamins and supplements. Keep the bottle cold once you get to where you're going.
When about to return, just liberally add the oil to a shake or smoothie. It's gonna taste super strong like weed and peppermint and probably make you shit like crazy for awhile after 6 hours, but if you need the weed and want a very low risk of getting caught, it will absolutely work.
>>734492721 You'll be fine as long as you drink no more than half what you normally would. Flying fucks with your hematocrit and makes you get drunk really easily. Ideally you want peak drunk an hour before you get on the plane.
>>734492827 Hi there anon 4chan user! Just stopping by to ask why you didn’t end this comment with a period? You are aware that this is improper punctuation and therefore the wrong way to go about using the english language correct? I think I speak for this community as a whole when I say that this is quite disturbing and it makes me very confused. Was this merely an accident? Did you really mean to add more but accidentally posted? Were you killed mid sentence? The problem is I have no clue! This will most definitely keep me up tonight if you don’t respond and acknowledge what you have done. Please reply with the proper correction. Thank you in advance it is greatly appreciated and I hope this clears up any confusion for any others in this thread.
Upon further investigation after I have typed this out you also did not capitalize the first letter in your sentence. Please acknowledge this mistake as well and let me know you will not be doing this in the future.
>>734493232 Honestly, it depends on the crew and air marshals. If you are obviously drunk, and reek of alcohol, I would never let you on the plane. If you look fine, maybe a little tipsy, you should be fine. But keep in mind, my airline (United) and most others have a policy forbidding us from allowing intoxicated people on board, so don't over-do it.
>>734493370 Except for the other folks who were on the flight getting pissed because there wasn't any left. I didn't realize just how bad his alcoholism was at this point. It's the kind of alcoholism where they don't even seem drunk until they're 10 in.
>>734493112 Oh man no way I will be sleeping tonight without a correction or two from you. Could you please be a decent human being and at least own up to your mistakes? I truly would love to get a good night of rest but I highly doubt it after this encounter.
I know it has probably been said already but DO NOT bring weed to the airport. Every time I've been to Vegas I've had at least a few guys offer to sell me weed and I wasn't even looking for it. It's not worth the risk to bring a goddamn brownie, there are dogs in the security line most time I fly, and I fly probably 6 times a month.
>>734493660 Oh man no way I will be sleeping tonight without YOU SUCKING MY COCK. Could you please be a decent human being and at least LICK MY BALLS? I truly would love to get a good night of rest but I highly doubt it after this encounter
This is not me for the record I will be doing no such thing. I am a straight male and do not indulge in homosexual activities. I find it quite rude that >>734493990 refuses to be a decent human being in my time of need. I thought this website had changed for the better but I will NOT give up hope.
>>734493660 Oh man! No way will I be able to sleep tonight without one or two corrections from you. Will you please be a decent human being or at least own up to your mistakes? I would truly like to have a good night of rest but I highly doubt that I will after this encounter.
Just dumb. Everyone in Wisconsin is literally retarded. That he posted a pic of that royal douchebag Aaron Rogers, maybe the biggest asshole and fakest of fakes in all of sports, which said Wisfag obviously worships, should tell you just how dumb he is.
>>734494467 I don't appreciate the ribbing you are trying to give me at the moment. I am here for self improvement and to clear this posters conscience. Do you really think I can sleep tonight without that correction?
Please support this website by donating Bitcoins to 16mKtbZiwW52BLkibtCr8jUg2KVUMTxVQ5 If a post contains copyrighted or illegal content, please click on that post's [Report] button and fill out a post removal request
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from that site. This means that 4Archive shows an archive of their content. If you need information for a Poster - contact them.