Fluffy thread, last one got swamped by trolls
Gonna ask again, anyone got that greentext of a fluffy getting eaten by a snake?
i gotchu fam
>"taiw be nyu fwend? pway wif babbeh?"
>snake food is 5 cents a pop these days
>people have been cutting back on non-fluffy foodsources for reptiles
>mice have animal rights after all, any alternative to preserve them should be taken advantage of
>so snake food is now worth as much as fluffies
>"wy taiw fwend nu tawk?"
>the brown foal is a quad amputee, mercifully evacuated a few minutes ago
>he sits in Kellog's warm tank, happily chittering away under the bright heatlamp
>Kellog himself is over 20 kilograms of Burmese python, and growing fast
>Kellog does not believe in the magic of friendship
>in fact, snakes cannot even feel love
>how sad is that?
>"daddeh is taiw fwend dummy taiw?"
>it takes roughly five minutes of the fluffy wriggling around before the motion stimulates Kellog's hunting instinct
>which really makes you wonder why snakes haven't gone instinct
>but then, it takes you twenty minutes of rechecking the fridge to see if food magically appears before you just break down and make it from scratch, so..
>Kellog raises his head up, evaluating his prey while testing the air with his flickering tongue
>100 million years of instinct is aimed directly into the fluffies face
>three research and development cycles of friendliness shines back
>like a beacon of retardation blazing out across a black sea of indifference
>"nyu fwend pway now!? Babbeh WUV nyu taiw fwe-URP!"
>snakes are just massive tubes of abdominal muscle
>Kellog snaps forward and latches onto the pillowed foal with deadly force and precision
>like an angry, carnivorous sock
>"EEEE! Sowwy sowwy pweas sowwy!!!" fluffy's first instinct is to assume pain is punishment from misbehavior
>it might be a sensible instinct if they were capable of accomplishing anything to be guilty of besides poo
>"SCREE NU HUWT PWEAS SOWWY PWEAS TAIW FWEND!! BABBEH NU KNO WHAT DO SOWWY SOWWY!!"
>in true reptile fashion, Kellog is rolling in a circle while slowly forcing the foal back into his throat
>"PWEAS taiw fwend, babbeh nu am nummies! Nu wan NU WAN!!"
>"BABBEH SOWWY PWEAS PWEAS DADDEH SABE BABBEH NU WAN BE NUMMIES HUUUUU!!"
>"NU WIKE DAWKIES! NU WIKE HUWTIES!! JUS WAN GIVE HUGS AND WUV PWEAS BABBEH SU SOWWY BE GUD BABBEH PWEAS PWEAS PWEAS!!"
>"HUUUUU HU HU HUUU!!"
>slowly he disappears from sight
>interestingly, he is too small to be properly constricted to death by Kellog's esophagus
>you hear his muffled screaming all the way down
>it seems to continue even in Kellog's roiling stomach
>"nu wike nu wike!! Taiw fwend am MUNSTAH, nu fwend!! Babbeh wan out su muchies pweas..."
>fluffy bodies don't have high upkeep, and his oxygen intake is too low for him to suffocate thanks to the small bubble of air that went down with him
>you listen to his feeble apologies while Kellog relaxes and sunbathes
>doesn't seem like the foal is going to go too quickly
>you head off and do your homework
>the next day you check on Kellog
>pythons are basically immobile while they digest
>still a happy snek
>"DADDEH DADDEH DADDEH PWEAS BABBEH HAVE HUWTIES!!!"
>"PWEAS BABBEH SU SOWWY NEED OUTIES PWEAS PWEEEAAASSS!!"
>"HUUUUU HUU HUUUUU!! NU FEEW WITE.."
>foal is handling the experience of digestion about as well as you'd imagine
>pythons take up to 3 days to digest their meals, but bigger ones can sometimes take months!
>yours will only be a few days
>later that day the foal has reverted to the chirps he was making barely a week ago at his birth
>by the third day you are surprised to find him still alive
>but you can hear the pained gurgling coming out of Kellog as the infant fluffy tries to scream through his melting lungs
>by night he's finally quiet
>you're shelling out the extra nickel for a mute next time fucking god damn.
>well that was an experience
>you sincerely hope your readers remember that the feeding of live prey to snakes can cause damage to the snake as well
>it should only be done by an experienced keeper
>unless the prey are pillow fluffs, which are harmless
>just another reason to take the humane choice of fluffy snake food
>remember to always do your part to reduce the unneccesary suffering in this world
Wasn't around for the last thread, but I just opened it and saw the damage
Aw... see you tomorrow then. Have a good night.
>Be me, Autismo Anonson, 23 years old, in a dead end minimum wage job and a crappy apartment in the city
>Some days I contemplate jumping right out of my apartment building window, 5 floors down to the ground
>But I'd never really do it. Cowards way out, and I'm no coward.
>But still, life sucks. And it's lonely.
>One day, walking home from the goddamned McRonalds I work for, I spotted one of those vermin fluffies.
>I remember when they first popped up when I was like 19 they were a pretty big deal, and a major pain in the ass
>Nowadays, they're just as common as pigeons, and just as noticed.
>Not many people really care about feral fluffies anymore. Not unless they fuck up they're garden or impregnate they're own fluffies.
>No one cares about fluffies.
>No one cares about that specific fluffy.
>A dirty, wet and sad little runt of the Earth variety and a hideous neon green everything.
>Just looking at it is an affront to the eyes.
>But that day, some one did care
>I grabbed him by the scruff and lugged him up 6 flights of stairs.
>He whined the whole time, but life seemed to have battered him hard enough before I got to him that he was pretty subdued.
>When we got to the apartment, he finally spoke
>"Me too buddy"
>I opened the window, and dropped him out
>He didn't scream and didn't cry on the way down
>He hit the pavement hard. It looked painful.
>I posthumously named him "Reminder"
>A reminder that suicide is fucking stupid
>I went to bed, and that was that.
fidget spinners are the new waifu thread spam
When I was a little filly and the sun was going down
The darkness and the shadows they would always make me frown
I'd hide under my pillow
From what I thought I'd saw
But Grannie-pie said that wasn't the way to deal with fears at all
(Then what is?)
SHE SAID, PINKIE, YA GOTTA STAND UP TALL
LEARN TO FACE YOUR FEARS
YOU'LL SEE THAT THEY CAN'T HURT YOU
JUST LAUGH AND MAKE THEM DISAPPEAR!
HA HA HA!
this is some oc. i've been lurking and occasionally posting for a while now
it's hard to draw these thing's faces, and to make it look fluffy and not like a turd with hooves
You are on a whole 'nother level of special. You're thicker than a nuclear bomb shelter and my ex combined. That's not even all of the images the artist uploaded before he took a break. There's at least a dozen more parts to this, it even breaks off into something called "The Loft."
As my dad once said, don't try to school someone if you're a dropout.
>There's at least a dozen more parts to this, it even breaks off into something called "The Loft."
You are trying to desperately cover your ass. Why do you lie to strangers on the internet?
Why are you so worried about this? Just go to fluffybooru. I'm not related, i'm just the guy who posted the OC.
Fluffy threads are meant to be stress relieving, why are you so mad? If you know the artist go read it
Boy there is a lot of name-calling and bait going on here.
Come on, allies, this is not what these threads are about. I didn't come to see faganons having a contest to see who can say the most 3rd grade insults. I came for fictitious misery.