>>724694607 Considering it, mate. >>724694649 >>724694698 I've been on and off antidepressants for about 10 years and it hasn't made a significant difference in how I feel.
Just a month ago or so my new psychiatrist told me that I'm not really depressed and that I simply have body dysmorphic disorder, which felt like a big fuck you to my face considering that I've been told I have depression for so long.
I don't even know what to believe anymore. No idea what's wrong with me.
>>724695396 i may be bipolar... if i get diagnosed with that i'm killing myself immediately, other than that the only thing that's made me keep going through my depression is just the "hope" that it's gonna get better one day... gay and dumb as fuck but i mean we only get one chance at life - absolutely nothing is gonna happen after death
Honestly, I'm just too depressed to even kill myself at this point. I got a fool-proof method (train), but the amount of energy, mental and physical, I'd have to expend to get my fat 400-pound ass down to those tracks on time is fucking exhausting to even consider.
>>724695856 when u say it like that it doesn't really sound much like depression, just laziness... but yea no i relate, i got train tracks by my house, they're really tempting during a panic attack, but to actually kill myself i'd probably need a gun in my hand at the right moment, otherwise it's so........ "extra" to go out of ones way to kill oneself
This thread says the same things my various psychiatrists have been telling me for 15 fucking years. Me: I'm so depressed I sleep all the time and can't get anything done the few hours a day I'm awake Them: Well you need to not sleep all the time and you need to do things during the day. So all I have to do to is all the stuff my depression prevents me from doing? The cure for depression is to just stop having depression? Thanks, you fucking idiots, here's my copay, see you in a week if I haven't killed myself. My parents are still alive, and, believe it or not, I have a wife. Once the folks are dead and I alienate my wife enough for her to leave me, I'll be able to kill myself. Until then, I have to put up with seeing psychiatrists, psychologists, and shitposting on /b/ during my more lucid moments. If you have the balls for it, OP, off yourself. I don't.
>>724695443 just to add: my small ritual was going to a swimming pool once per week. In the beginning I literally struggled to get there, but slowly it became my habit and now swimming pool is my safe haven for self-being in my weekly schedule.
>>724696333 i wish i could... like... just sit and hang out with you and sesh. ya need something to live for. sell your house and travel with ur wife somewhere nice.. like go on a backpacking adventure! do not keep taking ur meds unless you know they work (triggered a mania for me ;/)
There is no one coming to save you. No one actually cares that you are suffering. Worse, they don't even notice.
A girlfriend won't cure it (you'll never be attractive enough anyway). A good friend won't cure it (no one wants to be around someone like you). Your parents won't help (you are a complete disappointment to them). Getting a job won't help (why should they hire a liability?). No therapist will truly care (take this pill and get the fuck outta my office).
>>724694293 OP, there are the little things. they are little, but they are better than nothing. Everyone knows the drugs & alcohol route wont work for you longterm, but they do help a little. Random walks around the block can clear your head temporarily. Enough to get a little energy in you. And a healthier diet. Not necessarily a HEALTHY diet, but just a little less sugar, and a little more protein.
When people say 'take it easy', seriously take it.. easy. Baby steps. It wont go away permanently, but it will get a little less bullshitty. Is bullshitty a word?
>>724695187 | >>724694649 He's right you know. I have had major depressive for almost 13 years and tried 6 or 7 SSRIs etc. which had no noticable improvement on my mood. I just started one 3 weeks ago, and I finally found one that works. My mood is super improved, I don't find myself repeating "just kill yourself" in my head constantly.
I'm doing my taxes right now, paying soeme bills, looking for a new job, and reading a book with a smile on my face.
From someone who's been there, just keep trying till you find the one that works.
I was like you Anon. Then I just followed my dreams..Your dreams could be to be a sissy maid for the girl of your dreams while your family and friends choke on the dust of who you never were but I guess thats just me..
It may be controversial, but not only do I refuse to believe, I am actually unable to comprehend how someone who isn't a kissless virgin and was able to attract a woman enough to get her to marry him could have depression. I simply don't believe you.
First try just to get one task done each morning, make your bed. Then add to it every day, things like showers, dental care. clean house, etc.. A Doctor might help you with medication, but you also need some type of mental health-care. It's a long dark road out of this shit, but you just have to start walking. Also, might have you Doctor see if you could be having some sleep pattern issues. Old fag here, after 10 years of meds, etc, etc, finally found to have narcolepsy, one pill called NuVigil in the morning and I'm awake and trying to make the best of it, best of luck OP and Anons.
>>724698881 Concurred. It's all about sleep dude. I used to think that depression was the reason I slept all day or stayed up all night even though I was tired. You next a strict sleep regimen. A quiet relaxing room. A bed that is designed for your sleep pattern. Will literally change your life in a month.
>>724698260 Okay, I have something I have to admit though. It may be recklessly stupid, but at least I'm being honest. I've been avoiding professional help because I don't want it on my medical record, and more importantly I don't want antidepressants on my medical history.
My parents ended up having 4 kids, and through the "Great Recession" weren't able to afford to help us through college, but still made too much money to qualify for any sort of educational financial aid. We weren't degenerate nigger bottomfeeders, and not wealthy. You know how it is, stuck in that financial grey area.
Anyway, my point is that pretty much my only hope at this point of making it through an education is joining the Air Force or Navy under IT and having the government foot the educational bill with the Post 9/11 GI Bill. The four years of military IT experience as well as the degree would set me on the right path.
Mental problems, professional help, and medication are pretty much automatic disqualifications for military service. I figured if I could deal with enough on my own I could avoid professional help, and PTSD wouldn't really be much of an issue in the "safer" branches of the military such as the Air Force or Navy.
That's where I am now. Still losing a bit more weight to pass the physical stuff to enlist. and dealing with the depression on my own.
>>724699975 because people never try out every solution/try different routes. like if it doenst work with changing daily routines then FUCK - get out of the country???? go travel???? prostitute urself for money, do drugs, read books, watch movies, just EXPERIENCE SOMETHING
>>724700882 then.. what are you waiting for? stop wasting everyone elses time... i'm just talking abt like if u have nothing to live for and everything's been shit this far..... like tf, then it's time to make some drastic changes and not just to ur sleeping patterns
>>724694293 Its perfectly ok to kill yourself. This isn't mandatory like I don't know retention ore something. If you feel you want to die then go ahead. Plan for a fake camping trip. Use a burner inside the tent about 1/3 to keep you "warm" the dioxide will kill you in your sleep. The end.
>>724699335 I just realized how different worlds we live in... But it seems like you've got your mind set on a path, so i wish u good luck on it, but yea also try and find happiness in the little things... sunshine and ice cream
i used to be a big babby about depression until i eventually just realized life is shitty and everybody puts up with it, some people are just more sensitive than others eat healthy, take walks every morning, get some houseplants or something.
>>724701772 yea no i was a bit harsh to the other person... im not used to /b or 4chan in general and their answer juust triggered™ me.
Anyways yeah no i totally get what you're saying, and that's really loving and precious of u. You just need to find something for yourself that makes u happy... best of luck to u sorry for seeming like a total asshole
>>724694293 I dont know what to tell you other than that your situation is very unlikely to be hopeless, it just appears that way because your spirits are so low that you see no light in the end of the tunnel.
sometimes the key is to just endure and bide your time, wait until your circumstances are slightly less fucked up or make a small amount of effort to make it less fucked up.
im 24, this time last year I masturbated 4-5 times a day to weird porn, smoked atleast a gram of weed a day, skip forward a year Ive enrolled on an education course, met some cool new people, stopped smoking weed without too much effort, had my first girlfriend etc etc.
you're living a nightmare but nightmares are just as real as dreams. I dunno man, a good reason not to kill yourself is the possibiity of experiancing high points you thought had long since passed you by.
im as fucked up as most of you on here, ive sniffed more panties than I can remember, rubbed my dick on my aunts tooth brush, had a dog lick my asshole, you name it. and now everyone thinks im a normie lol.
if you really wanna kill yourself, its upto you, but the chances are it'll hurt quite abit and you'll be wasting a massive oppurtunity.
>>724702697 regardless i've been there, and no matter how much you don't wanna hear it it DOES get better. whether it be a change in situation or just you just slowly getting better, it does happen don't completely give up hope anon >>724702739 >>724702817 was simply letting him know i wasn't making it up. didn't realize it was so easy to upset the emo crowd
I've watched my kids go through the stages of trying to mimic and then use these behaviors in order to a) identify themselves as part of a group (as you might "a jock" or "a geek") as well as b) have a go-to excuse to avoid situations necessitating responsibility (e.g. "I can't pay attention in class because ADHD/depression).
It's annoying to watch, but also just a tad entertaining, I'll admit - since daddy here is more internet-aware than most parents of the same age, I observe threads like this and then see the kids exemplify behavior and wording pretty much matching whatever the current trend is (e.g. use of the term "crippling depression" seemingly out of nowhere).
>My life is awful. I sleep all day and only look at 4chan in my free time. >Someone else fix my problems for me, you shouldn't expect me to fix them myself! >No I refuse to go to sleep before 4am and wake up before 2pm!
You have to be determined to change your lifestyle. It isn't going to happen over night, so don't just give up immediately. Just keep forcing yourself to do healthier habits, like sleeping/waking up early, eating 3 meals, not looking at 4chan all day to start off with.
>>724703790 you make a good point mate, but dont kid yourself, society is degenerating over time and we are becoming increasingly dysfunctional as a species, as life and the world around us gets more complex it is clear that our coping mechanisms are destructive and unsustainable.
solipsistic nihilistic materialism is the dominant ideology of the west.
we've always been kinda close but I never saw her in a sexual way at all. then one time we were on a family holiday and she bent over in the kitchen to put some laundry in the washing machine and her ass was fucking perfect, round, perky, just so fucking good, ever since then I became fixated with her ass.
she would invite me round to do oddjobs at her house, one time I was painting one of her rooms and I need a paintbrush so she spent about 10 minutes on her knees, bent over with her head in a cuboard and her ass sticking up in the perfect position to get fucked, she was wearing leggings and they were so tight you could see right through them to her panties.
anyway, later that day she left me alone in the house so I just went wild, found her dirty laundry basket in her room, sniffed every pair of used panties I could find, blew a load in her clean panties and put them back so she would notice. before I came I pulled my foreskin back and rubbed the head of my cock with her toothbrush until precum dripped onto it.
long story short ive wanted to fuck my 50-something year old religious divorced 5/10 aunt for around 4 years now, sometimes I fantsize about just raping her and making her cum.
theres more to the story but the rest of the details are probably boring.
>>724696333 You aren't even willing to try and get better. That's the fucking worst part. You have people that care about you and you are treating them like shit. Depression or not, you are a shit person
People with depression and mood disorders have been trying desperately for years to make everyone understand how real these disorders are, and that the symptoms aren't "totally in their head".
I am willing to accept this. I understand. Like when I have a cold, if someone said, "Hey, that runny nose, isn't real, it's in your head." that would be totally fucking retarded....
BUT NO ONE SAYS THAT.
They say "Hey! It's a stuffy nose, a dry throat and it sucks. But you always feel better if you have a shower, get yourself moving, and don't just lay around."
So depression OP...... I believe in your depression and its symptoms, I just want you to stop being a fucking lazy shit, and power through them. Like the rest of the world, with diseases, family members dying, divorces, house stress, kid stress, work stress.. etc fucking etc.
>only on nights before school >only school mornings >only during specific classes >not during fun classes like theater >never afternoons after school >definitely not Friday 2pm - Sunday about an hour before bedtime
But you know, I just don't understand because "crippling depression" is a very personal issue.
OK well hope that crippling depression doesn't continue much past 18 because I ain't paying for you to "treat" your "crippling depression" by sitting around the house watching TV and playing video games 24/7.
I can say I'm pretty depressed confidently but it comes in waves and I hide it from people decently. Like I could spend a good day or two depressed the entire time but eventually I'd get out of it and be manic for a bit. I say manic because I'm not happy per se, just excitable. I guess that sounds like bipolar disorder.
>>724699975 >you were a pussy for exiting the movie theater halfway through Transformers 3. If you're already having a shit time of it, why endure more? that does not make any sense, if you didn't like the movie you are a pussy for leaving? WTF you asshole
Stop it, just stop right now. You don't have bipolar disorder.
People who truly have bipolar disorder do things like drive around in their car, imagining it is the Millenial Falcon, throwing $20 bills out the window to their loyal subjects one day, and then the next can't get out of bed because why.
You're just having mood swings, ones you should learn to deal with now instead of trying to use them to define yourself so that you can fit in with everyone else with "crippling insert-affliction-du-jour-here".
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