>hear knocking on your door >see this What do?

>>724129331
fuck the long haired one while getting fucked by the macho one

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my sister loves the show they are in but i hate it its just stupid.

>>724129331
Ask if they have a warrant. In any event, I have nothing to say right now, I'm busy. We can set up an appointment in my lawyer's office if they need to ask any questions.

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>>724129331
Tell them I'm an aussie they have no jurisdiction

>>724129331
>your move mr. lawman

>>724129331

POWER THE MICROWAVE!

then open the door

Let them in, I love those guys!

>>724129331
explain to them that the weird noises they hear in my house is not a ghost, it's just the little girl in my basement

>>724129761
whats that supposed to do

Is that Trevor Moore?

>>724129834
If you don't know, it's not relevant to you anon

>>724129331
Shoot through the door. Real agents would know better.

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>>724129761

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>>724129834
>being this new

>>724129761
This.

>>724129331
laugh and continue to smoke my joint because those fuckers have no authority in my country
>not amerifat

>>724129331
"wad arre yu doin herr in india?"

>>724129331
Considering they investigate the supernatural I'd let them in and answer any questions they have as my life could be in danger and if I don't listen to them I will most likely die.

>>724129652
>In any event, I have nothing to say right now, I'm busy.
lmfao
"We have a warrant."
"I'm busy."
"Oh, well then excuse us. We'll come back when it's convenient for you."
Nigger they'd just come inside.
lmao their time is inherently more valuable than yours and if they have the ability (even when it's illegal) they will enter your home without your permission.

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>Drive away
>Go to mexico
>Changemyname to Antonio Banderas
>Learn how to play the guitar
>Sell drugs
>Be rich
>Keep downloading the shit that attracted the FBI to my old house

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delete search history
>they must never know where i hid her

>>724130154
>Nigger they'd just come inside.

I'm white, so no they wouldn't. Not without probably cause.

But how would you know that?

open the door
spray

>>724129331
Place them under citizens' arrest for impersonating FBI agents. Shoot them when they try to run for evading arrest.
LOL when I get a reward from the FBI.

>>724130548
"We have a warrant."
This is an event.
>"In any event..."
The implication is that it (the warrant) will allow them entry to either collect evidence or arrest your dumb white ass.
You can tell them to go away all you want, but if they actually had a warrant (the event that qualifies as "any event" is the procurement of the warrant) they'd bring backup and forcibly enter your property in order to accomplish their given task.
I've been detained several times. I've had my home invaded by police several times. I have lived with drug dealers. All of this and I still have no record to speak of.
Experience.

>>724129331
>
>pull the drive
>hammer
>microwave

>>724129331
Pretend not to be home. It always worked this way for me. After some knocking and going around the house they always left.

>>724130548
Are you fucking stupid? The whole reason they would get a warrant is to be able to come in without your permission.

>>724129331
>>724131013
LISTEN THE FUCK UP
IF YOU LIVE IN APARTMENT THIS IS NOT THE ANSWER, THEY WILL FIND THE LANDLORD AND GAIN ENTRY
IF YOU OWN YOUR PROPERTY AND YOU HAVE THE ONLY KEYS THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU FUCKING DO
I'm still clean and this has worked several times.

ALWAYS STAY BEHIND A LOCKED DOOR.
IF YOU CAN'T, MAKE SURE YOUR SHIT CAN.

>>724131042
they might not have a "no knock" warrant. They're usually harder to get because there are cases where the FBI has kicked in the door of someone's house and the resident thinks it's a robber so they shoot the federal agent.

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>>724130548
i'm white i have privileges
those days are over my man

>>724131359
OP image is of fbi at the door. Obviously they would knock and announce.

>>724131359
The case laid out by the OP predicates a knock.

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>>724129331
>Open the door.
>Ask them, "Have you ever heard of our lord and savior"
>Hand them a copy of Dr. Seuss' Green Eggs and Ham
>Show them this picture.

>>724131508

I love the way he falls.

Hide my stash obviously

>>724129331

Open the door while im naked with a vibrator in my ass, offer them the controler as we speak

possession of marijuana stills a federal crime right?
even in the states they legalized it?

Laugh at them because the FBI has no jurisdiction in Finland.

>>724131952
Si

>>724131952
I never understood the whole ''some states legalized it but you'll go to jail anyway if we catch you'' thing.

Like what's the point then?

>>724129331
Is that Moulder? Ayyyy lmao

>>724130548
>Probably cause
>Probably cause
>Probably cause
>Probably cause

Probably

>>724132049
state law vs federal law

>>724131952

Yup

>>724129331
Suck there sucks..

>>724129331
Tell them that area is secured and wait for them to leave

>Slip a frozen piss disk under door.
>Watch them get angry when their feet are soaked in piss

>>724129331
prepare the lube

>>724132049
Just don't do it near federal buildings

>>724129331
Scream "I AINT FRAID' NO GHOST" and continue with my day.

>>724129331
go incognito mode

>>724132613
This would be funny if they didn't have to stand and wait for it to thaw...

>>724132049
The "point" is to maintain the ability to curtail violence coming from cartels that export weed into the US. This is ignored and abused by individuals employed at the federal level, at their discretion.

>>724129331
Tell them supernatural was shit and they should fuck off unless they want anal play forced on them

>>724133181
They wouldn't just leave

>>724133181
>doesn't know how frozen piss works
>2018

>>724129743
hahahahaha, jesus this got me.

fuck someone please post this green