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itt we post a tool we use at work and anons try to guess our job

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 171
Thread images: 36

File: ai.png (45KB, 640x381px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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itt we post a tool we use at work and anons try to guess our job
>>
>>721018520
Pixel artist?
>>
>>721018622
promotional product designer
>>
>>721018520
McDonalds Fry Cook
>>
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>>721018520
>>
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>>
>>721018692
So basically graphic design
>>
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Ok guess mine. Seriously I feel like this thread is going to be mostly adobe suit screenshots. Who do you think has the time to post on /b/ while working anyway.
>>
>>721018520
unemployed
>>
>>721019177
back end devs while compiling
>>
>>721018913
right thats a broad category it falls under
>>
>>721019177
advertising, freelance artist or memeologist?
>>
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>>721018520
>filename
Can you inbreds even guess
>>
>>721019500
>>721019690
2D artist, I do whatever's in 2D in a game/website/ whatever
>>
>>721019832
IT guy
>>
>>721020460
where do you land gigs like that? or do you work for a company
>>
>>721020508
lol are you retarded, you think IT people do math or anything relevant?
>>
>>721020834
I sent my portfolio to every company I could find until one hired me.

>>721020894
The ones I know do that in their spare time. Programmers also. What's your job? Some kind of analyst?
>>
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>>721020894
i like how you think your job is super important and cool
>>
>>721021171
Engineer?
>>
>>721021212
It is cool man.

>>721021143
I'm a professional mathematician.
>>
>>721018520
Applefag
>>
>professional mathematician.
> cool
>plz
>>
>>721021143
oh i just assumed it was freelance work because usually game artists dont also do web development. I just landed my first real job in the field that isnt freelance
>>
>>721021351
So you do maths all day? That's not a job that's a hobby. What's your actual job right now?
>>
>>721021171
iunno but pretty awesome
>>
>>721021408
png from google images, i only use PC. I just dont think im an elitist because of it, like you
>>
>>721021563
I get paid to do research man
>>
>>721021531
Hey that's cool man, good luck with that. Deadlines are a nightmare sometimes but, hey, you'll have a constant income now.

They don't let me do design as much now because it was a small company at first so I had to work on tons of different projects at once. Now we hired an actual designer.
>>
>>721021776
Research on what? Consumer habits? Is that what you do? Sell infos to the illuminati you god damn traitor?
>>
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>>
>>721021905
Nah man, research on regular old math formulas.

Like
>Can this be proven?
Obviously
>Can I prove it?
Maybe, let's try
>Can we combine results
Oh man that's a new dank theorem, maybe I can publish yo

So no secret selling to any illuminatis or such. Just regular old mathematics.
>>
>>721022084
Soldier
>>
>>721019832
You're some kind of fag writing a calc textbook
>>
>>721022084
cocksucker
>>
>>721022346
>>721022440
You got it guys
>>
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>>721018520
>>
>>721022084
A homosexual, easy
>>
>>721022578
Feminist
>>
>>721022578
Professional victim
>>
>>721021171
Holy shit, you guys have a DMU 100? We're still stuck using the DMU 50. Lucky bastard.
>Has no clue what a DMU 100 is.
>>
>>721022084
74
>>
mobaXterm
>>
>>721022396
lol no that's not calc, and it's not a book. A paper.
Congratulations /b/ you are the 3rd+n person to ever witness it.
>>
>>721022578
Paul Blart: Mall Cop
>>
>>721018882
Fucking call center. Sorry!
>>
>>721019832
Looks like some quantitative analysis. The text is too blurry to read but looks like possibly distribution inside a bell curve just to +/1SD. You definitely are not a professional photoshopper or the text would have been easier to read but that's my guess.
>>
>>721023280
> The text is too blurry to read
are you blinde?
>>
>>721021351
Allright. I replied...
>>721023280
..as I scrolled down through the comments and before I saw this one. So was I in the ballpark with the bell curve distribution?
>>
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>>
>>721023460

helpdesk or sys admin

source: sr sys admin faggot here
>>
>>721023331
No, and I can spell blind too. But to address your point, yes your text is marginally readable. And small. And blurry. And I'm not putting that much damn work in for an answer on a thread, especially when I already know I'm in the ballpark.

In other words, I sure as hell wasn't going to go google that bullshit on your page. And if it wasn't a distribution on a bell curve, I was in the ballpark anyway. Quantitative business analysis.
>>
>>721023280
The text isn't blurry?
But yes my research branches over in quant and such stuff.
It's mostly about asymptotic distributions and spectral distributions and approximations.
At the moment I'm working on multivariate chi-squared distribution and it's spectral distribution.
>>
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>>
>>721023630
sys admin
>>
>>721023845
weed master
>>
>>721023644
Sounds super boring and useless.

>inorganic chemist who takes years to publish anything
>>
>>721023861

yeaboi
>>
>>721022578
mall security

>>721023845
child molester
>>
http://www.netcult.net
>>
>>721023644
That's great. I did all that shit and, to keep it in laymans terms, used regression analysis in optimization models for forecasting, staffing, running a Kanban inventory model, and about a hundred other things about 20 years ago when I worked for a fortune 3 company and was a pioneer in the field. My work resulted in multiple millions of dollars in profit and/or loss avoidance over more than a decade.

And speaking of decades, I may be a few decades older than you so you'll forgive my eyesight. It happens after years of looking at small numbers on a computer screen. Enjoy!
>>
>>721023997
Ex IT guy? Or soon-to-be ex IT guy?

Or you're a hacker. Or a troll.
>>
>>721023881
The masters smile upon you young one, learn the Wu-Tang way.
>>
>>721024172

nah. nothing valuable could be obtained from my screenshot.
>>
>>721023983
It's very useful, since much data is normally distributed. But it is super boring tho

>>721024078
That's really cool dude. You got anything decent out of it? Did they even have tons of data at that time or was it like... you know.. more or less guesswork?
>>
>>721024401
Hmhhh. Looks to me as if you work for an airline or possibly air traffic control.
>>
good luck guessing mine
>>
>>721024619

close. not aviation though. I don't really care though, I've lost all motivation over the last few months. I do maybe 15-20 minutes of work a week (if that) and just troll 4chan and youtube until its time to go home. I used to be a super hard worker until I realized that either way the corporate dick would be splitting my asshole open.

Basically I get paid 46 an hour to keep up to date on dank memes
>>
>>721024517
I pioneered data mining with the the company I was with in the early 90s and then pioneered the incorporation of all that data into relational database that ultimately allowed for inputs from probably 1 dozen mainframe reports and managerial input data tables and the output was one page of high-value performance data on hundreds of employees.

Before me, they had a 3 foot stack of dot matrix printout to go through...and never did. I changed the game at this world-renowned company with that, but that's only one example. I took that concept and utilized it in more and more ways, always challenging what was possible and...as much as possible...delivering that which everyone else in management believed to be impossible.

But, you are correct in that before data mining there was no data stream. This was the pre-windows DOS environment and I started out with Lotus 1-2-3 and Monarch before Windows 3.1 came out and I could really get fancy with it.
>>
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>>
>>721024834
Amtrack. That's my second guess since it's close, not aviation and you really don't care.
>>
>>721024693
You're a mod on 4chan?
>>
>>721018897
Penis inspection day assistant?
>>
>>721025121

Not Amtrack. Also not an American company. I had never heard of them until I started working for them.

I only care enough to keep the 401k and health bennies stacking
>>
>>721022578
>>
>>721025254
But it's a rail company though, right? And is the company in America even though it's not American owned?
>>
>>721025028
Holy fuck you might be the most interesting person on /b/. It's been an honor to chat but my shitty students are coming in 5.
>>
>>721025371

Not rail and company has many offices in America. Owned and founded in Europe.
>>
>>721024693
neet
>>
>>721025444
Make them do a regression analysis without a computer or calculator. Tell them it will benefit them to learn how to do it with pencil and paper.

And thanks for the holy fuck part.
>>
ITT computer nerds

If you work with a computer, you're a computer nerd.
>>
>>721025465
And when you say not rail that includes subways?
>>
>>721025617

unfortunately. I'd rather be climbing mountains than be wasting away behind this fucking computer.

Unfortunately the pay and bennies are just too good
>>
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>>
>>721025635

Correct. Luckily for me there are at least 5 IT people in each region and like 30 in the main region.

We are in the maritime industry.
>>
>>721025821
A cruise line? I was going that way next but you had to see it coming right?
>>
>>721024401
You realize that you made it kind of irresistible to keep going with this until we get there.
>>721025821
>>721026115
>>
>>721026115

Fuck I wish cruise line. Maritime transportation. They transport all kinds of shit as well as manning vessels that lay pipe and shit.
>>
>>721026260
And you might want to run out some clock until this thread goes 404. Just a thought haha.
>>
>>721026260

Lol I know. I ain't really worried about getting doxxed or anything. Like I said, I am one of like a hundred IT people
>>
>>721026269
A shipping company!
>>
>>721026364
>one of like a hundred IT people

We'll look at that one in a hundred part after we nail down the first part.
>>
>>721025090
student? ayy lmao
>>
>>721026412
>>
>>721026528
European company?
>>
>>721026520
>student?
replying to a "what tool do you use in 'work' thread"
>>
>>721018520
This is Adobe so I'm guessing you build Native American dwellings?
>>
>>721018520
>>
>>721025782
You work in the movie WALL-E
>>
>>721026707
Was referring to the fact that many students use VS, not specifically saying he IS a student.
> source : I am a triple computing student.
>>
>>721026528
>>721026628
So you're taking my advice and running out some clock now haha? Penalty question then. In addition to is it European I also will need to know if it's a major interest in that field...let's say in the top 5-10 companies in the world in that field.
>>
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>>
>>721023845
jeweler, goldsmith
>>
>>721026835
Now hat you mention it, this powerful baby does look like Wall-E
>>
>>721027107
statistic guy, had to use some R in my education, gay as f
>>
>>721023460
your network connection has an issue, fix it niger
>>
>>721027384
close.
analyst
>>
>>721027009
YOU TEST strength OM FUCKING THINGS
>>
>>721022729
we have a dmu 100 and one 60
>>
>>721027504
sameshit.jpg
>>
>>721027609
whit a robot between them to transfer 30 different pallets for long ghost works
>>
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>>721026898
>>721026528
So you're probably reading my comment and thinking, damn, if I'm not working for a European based company his next question will be if it's Chinese. If that's a no then he'll have the company I work for narrowed down to:

1. NYK
2. APL
3. Hanjin

http://www.marineinsight.com/know-more/10-largest-container-shipping-companies-in-the-world/

Let's let this one go...
>>
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???
>>
>>721018897
making blue science
>>
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This amongst many other things
>>
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>>721027731

No
No
No

Checked that site, we are not on that list. Searched my company through their search though
>>
>>721027897
>this nigga
Im dead xD
>>
>>721027874
thats a camera
>>
>>721025444
Note. No QBA required for this one, unless you really appreciate the discernment needed to get an adequate R-squared for all your variables in a production function but that's really getting nit-picky now.

>>721027731
>>
>>721021171
its a time machine you faggots
>>
>itt: wageslaves
Lmao @ you cucks
>>
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>>
>>721025782
skynet industries ?
>>
>>721028185
you a killer
>>
>>721028177
t. NEET
>>
>>721027874
its a space station /Nasa ?
>>
>>721027910
mecanno engineer
>>
>>721027949
Sure;) I'll give you credit for not blowing smoke at this point to cover your tracks. Also will not note that if I was sure you were coming back to answer my last questions and if I wanted to nail it you were maybe one more question away from me nailing down the exact company but it's all good. And just be careful in your assumptions about what can or can not be derived from a screenshot. You never know. It was a fun guessing game it's good that it stopped where and as it did. Best wishes going forward.
>>
>>721023656
Survey tech or GIS tech?
>>
>>721028403

Thanks! I'm sure that it wouldn't be hard nailing it down or even tracking it back to me. I agree that you really do never know.
>>
>>721028331
it's a fucking RED camera
>>
File: IC816797.png (7KB, 677x443px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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This is almost unfairly vague but whatever
>>
>>721028185
Rod man?
>>
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meh
>>
>>721028477
>>721028249
Radiation MD
>>
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>>721018520
>>
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>>
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>>721028510
Yeah. I mean you basically have boiled it down to the Chinese and European based companies and...with you speaking English so well...I know which way I'm leaning. Just a handful of choices then and, without any IP magic, it wouldn't take too much to figure that out. Now, I know the gist of this thread is just figuring out your job....not the exact market segment and company but there's always someone who wants to over-achieve haha.
>>
>>721028690
Material handler.
>>
>>721028818
Fool?
>>
This should be easy
>>
>>721028565
Network administrator.
>>
>>721028565
Virgin ?
>>
>>721018897
IoT engineer
>>
>>721027874
Movie maker ?
video stuff ?
do you really work with a red camera?
>>
>>721029051
Photographer.

https://www.amazon.com/Sekonic-Corporation-401-757-Exposure-Profile/dp/B001JQLH8I
>>
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but no one will know
>>
>>721027874
Skynet cybernetic air command bot?
>>
>>721029196
you damn right
>>
>>721029019
Are you retarded? Never mind, this is /b/. Of course you are.
>>
>>721028925
you a amish prostitute?
>>
>>721029254
Cartographer?
>>
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>>721018520
pic related
>>
>>721028925
Mexican?
>>
>>721029075
Close, but not specifically that. I fill in for those guys in a pinch but otherwise exclusively do something else
>>
>>721029348
Comedian?
>>
>>721028987
im working at the warehouse in russia
not sure how that profession called in us/eu
something between warehouse worker and wh administrator
>>
>>721027874
>RED
cameraguy
television?
>>
>>721029447
Programmer?
>>
>>721029463
No. I'm a tarot reader. Which fucking comedian uses tarot cards in his act?
>>
>>721029463
lol
>>
>>721029492
Yeah, we call it a material handler and it's essentially the same job.
>>
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>>721018520
Hardmode
>>
>>721029614
damm you one of those tv guys late at night i stand up for,,, to look for remote
>>
>>721029614
You could be the first. And why is any of what I said at all surprising to you?
>>
>>721028925
Concrete worker.
Thread posts: 171
Thread images: 36





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