Should i leave my girlfriend before I kill myself?

Stop it

>>720995177
you shouldn't kill yourself at all

>>720995836

I have chronic pain and an auto immune disease. Im on opiate painkillers and my joints are deteriorating. Ive lost my job and I cant study.

Not much to live for anymore.

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This board has gone to shit. If you want to off yourself go for it. Your choice.

>>720995925
They aren't asking if they should kill their self though.

>>720995177
I did, and I still can't kill myself. I regret breaking up with her.

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:'D

>>720996028

Fuck Anon. I feel you. Thats what im most worried about.

How long were you originally planning to wait before you kill yourself after breaking up?

don't break up with her. it's way better if she comes to your funeral and cries her balls out. At least YOU get something after the fact. You can die knowing that

>>720996110
I had planned to hang myself the following week after certain things were in place. I blindsided her with the breakup, and she was hysterical. When the time came I couldn't do it.

>>720996762


Did you ever tell her why you broke up with her?

>>720996762
better od on opiates tho, more chill death, less mess.
weather you stay with your gf or not, she will feel guilty, you basically transfer your pain to her. do something that makes it easier for her to accept your decision. you know her. you'll figure something out.

>>720996918

Thats the plan, I already have over 200mg of oral morphine

>>720996827
No. It wasn't my intention. There's no way you can justify it; either way she's going to lose you.

>>720996989

my bad im OP btw.

>>720996989
so whats your idea for her?

>>720995177
impregnate her first

>>720997037

How long ago was it when you broke up with her?

>>720997068

Im still floating the idea of whether I should break up and give her a month. Maybe say some really bad things so its easier for her, make her angry at me.

>>720997121

She's on the pill

>>720997159
tell her that you love her and you want to marry her.

>>720997159
that's not gonna work brother, you hurt her when you break up and then you hurt her even more when she realizes you just said the mean things so your suicide won't hurt her as much. come up with something better. give it some time to think about it. not for you but for her.

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>>720997230

We're in our early twenties.

I'd rather she lose an ex-boyfriend than a current fiance.

>>720997159
It's been four months. We're out of contact.

>>720997284

Any ideas of how to distance myself then?

>>720997334

Thats rough my bro. Are you happier at all?

>>720997334
I agree with this anon. >>720997284

>>720995896
don't make your gf likfe miserable by killing yourself
try to enjoy what you got left...if you an hero, everyone will remember you with pain and pity

>>720997340
honestly no idea if you want to kill yourself in a timely manner. break up with her and move somewhere else, give it some time so she can move on. I know this might sound like I want you not to commit suicide, but honestly I don't care about you. if she doesn't hear from you for a year and then hears that you killed yourself it might be easier. the only way to distance yourself from her and take away her guilt ("i shouldve seen the signals" etc.) is distance in time.

>>720996989
200 mg aren't going to do the trick, especially if you are used to opiates. You need at least 400 mg and some antihistamine/grapefruit juice/ benzo/ wine to potentiate it. gl hf OP

No..

She will get the most cock out of saying "my bf is dead"

>>720997420
Still on the same track. It's been a drawn-out process that I still haven't fully come to terms with. The breakup was just another step.

>>720997572

Do you think 400mg will definitely be past the point of no return? Definitely going to chase it with alcohol.

>>720997609

I hope it gets better for you anon

why are you going to do it

>>720997609
Again, this anon's got it. >>720997540

>>720997653
Thank you. I hope you find peace with yourself in your decision.

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>>720997669

Too much physical pain and suffering.

On days ill flare, ill be liquid shitting 2-3 times an hour. My joints are making it hard to keep mobile.

I've had a bowel resection and had my abdomen cut through leaving me with chronic pain. The stomachs can leave me curled up on the floor and crying.

>>720997540

Thank you.

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>>720997813

Stomach cramps*

>>720997813
i gotta go now, i wish you the best of luck.

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>>720995177
Nah, stay with her. You should blame her in the note too, but only a little bit, not the main reason make her a sidebar. Don't want her feeling too important. Just humble the bitch a little bit, you'll actually do the world some good before you go.

>>720997813
fuck man. I honestly have no idea what to say. i'll be honest i haven't read through, do they dope you up pretty good?

>>720997917

You too

>>720997965

I used to be on 120mg of oral morphine a day, now on 20mg.

>>720997940

I love her too much to do that, she's never hurt me ever.

>>720998077
so there's no chance it will ever go away?

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>>720998146

Nope, ill have it till the day I die.

>>720998220
i wish i knew what to say OP. I'm not just going to leave this thread and forget about you. I honestly feel bad. wish there was something i could say or do

You want to kill yourself and you have a gf?

If you would have REAL clinical depression you wouldn't have a gf. Why? Because clinical depression takes away every single feel you could possibly have (negative as well as positive).

So what does it feel like? It feels like being a fucking robot. Yes, a robot. You're not actually feeling sad... cause 're feeling NOTHING.

You can't properly sleep, zero erections (even when looking at p0rn), zero motivation, alcohol has no real effect on your emotions, video games are not enjoyable, etc. the whole freaking year.

At that point, you're just waiting to die because life is so boring, not because you feel sad...

>>720998362

That means a lot. Thank you

>>720998077
It's not about hurting her, it's about making her a better person. She's going to hurt no matter what btw, even if you're apart for years.

Have a nice song.
https://youtu.be/pMFDPQk0TEs

And then really really think about what it'll be like if you go through with suicide. I mean obsessively think about what it will be like. Think what every single person you've ever known will think. And picture your body in any position you plan to do it. That's the shit that changed my mind.

Plenty of people have auto immune and live happily. Look at Montel Williams. Get off the drugs and give it a chance.

>>720995896
Fuck man, life can still be good. This is our only chance we'll ever get, ever. After this, it's nothing. Think about that. At the very least you should go travel and see whatever parts of the world you can.

>>720998491

Hopefully Ill wake up in the morning and i wont have the urges.

>>720998420

Thats whats keeping me from doing it.

My wife's got much the same. Cronhs disease, ankylosing spondylitis, osteoporosis. She's attempted suicide several times now. It sucks. I can't tell you what to do, OP, but I feel for you. I know what you're going through.

>>720995177
Here is what you should do op.
Get a long (at least 6 inches) thin (at most 2 cm wide) knife. Wait for valentines day.
Take her out to a super fancy restaurant.
blow all your money on making it as romantic and wonderful as possible.
Then take her back to your place or a fancy hotell room and make love to her. And right when she orgasms STAB HER RIGHT THRU THE HEART SO FAST SHE BARELY HAS TIME TO REGISTER WHAT JUST HAPENED.
then stab yourself thru the hear real fast also and then go balls deep in her and kiss her and keep fucking her until you both bleed out and keep telling her how much you love her and how pretty and sexy she is while you both bleed out and die in eachothers arms as you fuck.
Dont worry about cleanup or consequences. You will both be dead. And you dont have to worry about her mourning you because she will be dead too.
Make sure you also put the knife in her hand after you have both been stabbed that way forensics will think that you both stabbed eachother in a romance suicide pact.
It will be a nearly perfect death.

Option 2
Do the whole blow all your money on romance thing and also the whole expensive hotel thing.
But set up the hotel with a few cannisters of helium under the bed.
After yall have fucked and she has fallen asleep.
Wad up a towel snd shove it under the door.
Then open the canisters and go to bed. You will painlessly suffocate in your sleep together.

Option 3 same veginning as 1 and 2.
But this time you get cyanide. Put the cyanide in a couple glasses of water. Fuck to your hearts content then after sex offer her a glass of water. Insist that she drink it. Make sure she does or this will all fail. After she drinks shotgun yours and then cuddle as you both die quickly suddenly and painlessly.

Let us know how it goes!

>>720998569
So get off the dope and hit the gym, work the pain out, pussy. FYI, no amount of attention from /b/ is going to make it better.

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Im going to head to bed now guys, thank you so much. I love you all.

Im safe for tonight this made me feel a bit better.

I love you all. No homo

>>720998665

Still waiting for your balls to drop?

>>720998637
Further to this, some antidepressants have pain relieving effects, are these an option? Comorbidity with depression is common in these conditions. Totally not surprising.

>>720998637

Heading to bed, but I have Crohn's disease too. Be strong for her.

>>720998670

Theres a point where your mental strength cannot overcome it. The cramps make it impossible to move. I've had to call an ambulance twice and go to the hospital for it.

>>720998665

grow up

>>720998831
Thanks man. Doing my best here. Good luck.

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>>720998727

Im going to switch depression meds ASAP. Hopefully theyll help.

Good night all, I hope you have a good day/sleep

Don't go out like a bitch. Go out trying some long shot experimental treatment. Go to Mexico and pick a fight with a drug lord. Go to Africa and walk into a warlords compound Rambo style.

>>720998391
gotta go but god bless OP. will be praying for you

>>720998831
Damn, I thought you meant something serious. I have Crohn's and ibsd myself. Just get fucking used to it, I did. Been dealing with both for 27 years. Ffs I shit out the mucosal lining of my intestines this weekend the day before my birthday, and was relieved to find out the pain wasn't my liver failing.

yes. if you sincerely plan to kill yourself and don't want her to wonder for the rest of her life, just break up with her. she'll feel a crazy close connection and it will be almost the same anyways. it will lighten the blow.

>>720998996

Right, that will do a lot of good! Fuck off, godfag...

>>720999176
*Tips fedora*

>>720995896
Video games do it