No one's posting. What's up anon?
I just really miss an old best friend of mine that I ruined the relationship with because I thought I was too smart for her. Now I'm just thinking of her everyday, wondering if we would ever talk again.
I fucked i up a friendship at the last new years eve. I've got drunk and become agressive. After 2 weeks i took all my courage and talk to her. Everything is fine just like before. You should give a try too
The problem with me is that I have no courage left in me. I don't feel brave enough to speak with her again, even though I really wish we could speak like we used to years ago. The last time I spoke to her was about 3 months ago, two days before her birthday.
>be me have 2 highschool crushes
>date the first crush for a few years, have kid, get married
>can't complain life is good
>every so often think of other crush and think of what could have been
>wife says she has started talking to other crush
>wife is bi and also had a crush on qt3.14
>wifey has been talking to crush about joining our relationship and being shared by us
>crush is into it and talking about moving in with us
>mfw i don't know what i did to deserve this but all i feel is joy
I've only been with one girl, I love her and I think she does it too. But I wasn't her first, not even close, she had some partners, and I always say that I don't care about that, but I really wish she was experiencing everything from the start with me. That she was feeling like I feel everytime I touch her or kiss her.
But in the other hand, it's not where you start but where you finish what really matters right?
>if not then you didn't lose anything
She was my best friend for about 5 years. She would have calmed me the fuck down whenever I was pissed or depressed over something. As I said, I ruined the friendship by thinking I was smarter than her. I myself don't think anyone would forgive anyone for doing that.
>i remember when i used to call my dad at all hours of the day with stupid questions about life, about how to fix things, about the answers to my questions no matter how small or dumb
>now all i hear is the phone ring and a message telling me this number has been disconnected
>mfw dad died when i was a baby
>mfw will never have the feeling of asking my dad how to fix stuff
>to give me relationship advice
>to play a game of ball with him just one time
You had a little time with him, i had nothing.
>Saved as Windows 98 screen saver
My mother died when i was 12 and i met my father when i was 17.
And everybody around me pretends that i have to be okay and accept it because '''life is hard, Anon''. Yeah, it is.. for me, not for you faggot. When i fail in my adult life no one says ''but he has had a bad past''. Life is unfair, bro. But we have to keep going, we don't have a choice.
yeah i'm this >>720815786
anon and i gotta say it is better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all and not being able to even have those moments with him is far worse then losing him after all those moments
i feel for you bro to the point i would be happy to be your stand in father just a phone call away to help you, give you advice and guidance son
i live 600 miles away from home and have no money
my studies are failing
my girlfriend of SIX years broke up with me today because i essentially lied to her and betrayed her, i guess. kept shittalking her / didnt stop others (e.g. my parents) from shittalking her and im essentially an idiot and a cunt.
i just feel empty. i know literally no person on this planet better than her and spent most of my time with her for 6 years. and thats now over and i feel like absolute shit and dont know what to do.
Sure but sole custody doesn't mean you can't see your kid. Even if your a piece of shit druggie you can get supervised visitation (i'm guessing as a britbong). But yea you're right, I don't know the backstory.
I am going to therapist for the first time tommorow. I don't know what to expect, honestly. Like, what do I tell him/her?
That I've felt like shit for years now and even considered suicide before? That I get more bitter with every year passing and that I hate nearly everything and everyone at this point?
Do I tell him/her that I can't sleep at night and that despite that I hardly find any strenght to even get up every morning?
Do I admit to the fact that I am probably just insecure and all the hate comes just from me being jealous of others?
Can I tell him/her that I hide behind irony, sarcasm and cynicism just to hide my own shallow self in fear of someone discovering who I truly am and how empty I am?
I don't know what to expect /b/ros.
if you want help
then yes you tell them
they are there to help you not to judge you
some of them are fucking awesome and are jsut there for you to vent and unload and give you advice while letting you speak your mind
you may not always like what they have to say but you need to hear it
don't hold back anon, just be honest with what you are going through
otherwise what's the point of going?
> be me disclosing age later
> start in birthplace of North Charleston South Carolina
> dad is 17 mom is 18
> they had hurr durr plan that if she got pregnant he would just join the military and all would be fine
> protip: it doesn't work that way kiddos
> dad joins army after I'm born and he and madre fight constantly about everything
> ff about half a year
> am not even a year old yet
> dad just drops off the face of the earth
> goes completely awol and nobody has any idea where he is
I'm going to explain my relationship with my father first and if you guys want more after just say so, it's been a long journey but I've made it through so it's alright.
> dad calls every now and then and his mother is the only one that occasionally knows where he is
> summer of about 7 years old
> still think my dad is ok dude
> he calls
> "anon I wanna come visit you this summer sometime this month or the next I don't know when I'll be able to though but I promise I will find a way to see you"
> am glad to finally see him after five years
(He had showed up when I was two and he was thrown in jail for going awol but they released him on bail then he split, banned from returning to South Carolina or he'd be in prison)
> I waited every day
> at the end of the driveway in a long chair reading books and looking up at every passing car hoping it'd be him
> weeks go by and it feelsbadman.jpeg
> months now and I almost can't stand waiting
> turns out he told my grandmother he wasn't coming
> I spent every day on the driveway for an entire summer waiting on him
> He never came
> last time I heard from him was him telling me he'd come to see me
> I didn't talk to him for another 8 years
A lot happened between then and 8 years though
> relationship currently with him is weird
> he buys me gifts all the time and we get along
> but Nothing could make up for years lost
- Remember, it's a relationship; it takes a while to feel comfortable enough to open up and trust that person completely. So don't feel bad if there's no connection or you feel awkward the first few sessions.
- Also, this specific person may not work for you. Whether it be their style of therapy (there are many) or the person themselves. Don't feel weird if you want to visit someone else - I've been there. It's no big deal and it happens quite a bit. Maybe one-on-one isn't your thing and you like group? Maybe you're not a fan of CBT? It all depends on how comfortable you feel.
Good luck, anon!
Rather than me just going to random points of my life would you guys just rather pick from a list of shit topics I have to hear different parts of my story?
Rape (actual rape)
Girlfriends (the major impact relationships)
Friendships (the most influential ones)
Grandmother (cancer as well)
My attempts at help/self help
Teenage years (summarized)
Current (will be the last topic I cover as to keep it a bit longer lasting and to keep all of you interested)
Thanks anons for listening. Maybe one day I'll get up and talk to her again. Maybe.
I'm going to head off to sleep, so goodnight everyone. Hope you all feel a bit better after this thread.
It's a good story I just don't know where I wanna start so I figure you guys could just pick what you wanna hear about. And also all of it is 100% true. I wouldn't bother to lie about this because that would just be distasteful
My dad just hates my guts.
let's start with high school, if that's ok with you anon
presuming you're still here
i always follow these threads but never have a story to post
why of all things does this hit me so hard
idk, i don't have much feels to share, i just kinda wished i had someone who actually likes me and wants to play games and stuff.
and also deal with my annoying bullshit that i keep telling to people. but eh, i'll just full blast some queen on my birthday and sing, why am i here
How about all that?
>Well my parents are dead
>i have no friends
>my ex-gf told me to kill myself so many times
Who am i kidding i don't have an ex
>No siblings either
>No cousins are anything called me or contacted me for years
This should be a response to that wall of text
and thats pretty much why i keep going. But i dont see any light a the end of the tunnel.
i see no ships.
Yep. It s frustrating when you give special treatment to someone that doesn t do the same to you, so maybe you feel like you are having the best time in your life while she is thinking -It is fun, but I am alredy used to this- What I recommend is that her relationship with you feels different (better) compared with the last ones, so that she can experience a tighter bond with you. Girls are a little tricky sometimes but in the end they all want us to treat them like princesses.
this hits me really hard man... fell in love with my best and probably my only friend. everything went to shit and I knewi was making her life wrose so I broke up with her now she has a bounch of other people in her life and we are still "friends" but I only have her. I'm losing her more and more every day but I still love her like it's the first day of our relationship and it's killing me. Every time my phone rings or I hear a facebook notification i always jump a little thinkig it's her but it's not her those days are gone.
my great uncle was the ambassador to lithuania for a while before becoming the ambassador to georgia russia during that whole bs that was going on a few years back
not the anon you were talking to just saw lithuania and felt like chiming in
I hope you find someone or someones.
how old are you?
if you literally have no one and are certain of it then one of two things:
1) you are truly free and can do whatever it is you like, whether it be to continue living or take your own life without repurcussions
or the more probable 2)
you are so selfish that you actually think your actions can't hurt others, be it because there are no others or your inability to see beyond yourself
if you want to kys that's fine. just don't go and act like it's a zero-effect action, even less consequential than fucking spilling a soda cup at a fast food joint. own up to your very last decision in life for once.
sometime i think if i moved away had a fresh start somewhere i could be okay. but then i realize i would just be the same fuck up somewhere else.
>Lose my 1st love after almost 5 years of relationship
>feel like shit for a few months
>find a girl on 4chan of all places
>talk a bit, seems like i made her up myself
> end up going to see her for summer holiday after talking for like 3 weeks. Her and her parents since she was still 17
>Fucking great holiday, happy again
>After that, she sometimes disappear for a few days or weeks but we still talk
> Then nothing for 7 months.
> Down in the dumps again, wondering why i keep going, everyday is like the last
> She finally comes back, we talk again, i'm back on cloud nine
> I haven't talked to her in a few days and i feel so fucking bad again... Why is it so fast to go down?
Pic totally unrelated, but bumping with pic too
Oh this wasn't what i feel like, i just thought it would have been a perfect response for something posted in a feels thread.
I would never kill myself because this describe almost exactly what i think about suicide
Plus it would have shut the other one up
well I can't speak for others and there was a time in my life where I was certanly kind but i'm a bitter selfish asshole now that's for sure
The few friends i used to have are no longer friends, they are strangers to me, i feel like i dont belong with them, all of them have jobs, all are in relationships, it seems like i am the only one that cant find his place in the world, i dont even have fun the few times i go out with them
because you put to much emotional stock into whether or not you are loved by a woman
i would assume you have some issues involving your mother whether you know or not
and not the wincest kind
you need to focus on making yourself happy/content rather than your happiness being dependent on the love of a female