Schizophrenic OP here again. Requesting fucked up/Schizophrenic

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Self-bumping with related art.

Guess it ain't happening at the moment.

>>719970154
got nothing to contribute, but i'm gonna bump for you just because

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>>719970154
How do I get schizo? looks fun

>>719970154
do you experience visual hallucinations?

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>>719970154
question. Do you actually see hallucinations? Also do you feel the movie; A beautiful Mind was a good depiction of what being Schizophrenic is like? I don't have any art like that so heres a pepe

seems OP left his own thread

>>719971720
I don't think you know how to use semicolons, buddy

>>719970154
>Schizophrenic

I don't believe you. I have met two people with legit schizophrenia and even when they are on sufficient meds that allow them to sort of function in society, they still actually believe the delusional they have. They just have been taught to suppress them as "delusions."

So list your crazy ass delusions.

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>>719971512
No problem, many thanks anon.

>>719971616
Oh God it's you again kek.

>>719971681
A few times, but it isn't on a regular basis or anything. It's all in my head, mostly auditory, and yet I don't actually "hear" them most of the time.

>>719971720
I don't see things that often at all, but I have before. I haven't seen that movie yet, so I couldn't tell you. Most of what I've seen television and movies portray Schizophrenia is wrong. I don't see dead people, I don't hear statues talk to me and tell me to kill my whole family. I have a few (three to be exact) parallel thought process in my head that "think" to me. They have their own identities and personalities, and it isn't a positive thing when they interact with me. Thank you for the pepe anon, have another.

>>719972044
that was a typo dawg didnt mean to type it at all. but really im just surprsied i am making coherent sentences cuz i'm drunk as fuck.

>>719972011
No, I'm here.

>>719972078
I'm extremely delusional, it's getting harder and harder every day to suppress them as delusions as you said. While intellectually I know it's preposterous, I can't shake the feeling that I'm a god. Like I have and abundance of dormant power that I could use if I just knew how. I'm very paranoid, and for instance a couple of years ago, my ex (gf at the time) made me cookies and brought them to me, and after she left (and I had already eaten them) I was overcome with so much paranoia, I actually called her and asked her if she was trying to poison me.

>>719970154
OP I'm 38 and was diagnosed with schizophrenia at age 21. It can get better with hard work and time. I am unmedicated now since 2013. It's not perfect, but I'm working my fucking ass off. You don't need to suffer with a "broken" brain forever dude.

>>719972521
It sucks, it's very painful but I don't want to get rid of it... It's still part of who I am as a person. I can't connect with others, I look at even my girlfriend, or my mother, and I can't comprehend that they are conscious like I am, that they exist. I'm extremely lonely, and these things in my head are the only company I have. I can't just rip them out, they're a part of me. I'm afraid to get better, I don't know why. I think of taking meds or even just using other methods, and it makes me anxious.

>>719972325
>I'm extremely delusional, it's getting harder and harder every day to suppress them as delusions as you said. While intellectually I know it's preposterous, I can't shake the feeling that I'm a god. Like I have and abundance of dormant power that I could use if I just knew how. I'm very paranoid, and for instance a couple of years ago, my ex (gf at the time) made me cookies and brought them to me, and after she left (and I had already eaten them) I was overcome with so much paranoia, I actually called her and asked her if she was trying to poison me.

FAKE Schizophrenic. Get fucked.
A real schizo would not diagnose him/herself with such lucidity.

Again, I will state very plain and simply I know two LEGIT cases. One was a women who was once a real MD, who had a psychiatric break and lost her license.

The second case was someone who at first was diagnosed "bi-polar with delusions." At any rate, I know/knew (one has since died) very well and YOU exhibit the signs of a mentally disturbed fuckhead, but not schizophrenia. You're a wannabe.

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>>719972093
>mostly auditory, and yet I don't actually "hear" them most of the time.

Elaborate. For the last few years I've been suffering from something similar in which I imagine conversations, as though something is said to me or as if I'm approaching someone with a subject and I'll involuntarily vocally reply to my imagination

Earlier tonight for example I was talking to someone and said something that along the lines of: if you don't go to the damn doctor I'm gonna knock you out and drag you there. I imagined someone outside of the context of the conversation hearing it, and I involuntarily vocally replied "it was just a joke don't take it out of context"

Every time I do this I think to myself what the fuck? Why are you answering your imagination?

>>719972521
Diagnosed with schizophrenia, and no meds for 4 years??

You don't have schizophrenia.

>>719972837
And I hope that went without saying I've never experienced an auditory or visual hallucination. Simply imagine conversations and involuntarily reply or say out loud what I was planning on saying.

>>719972782
>I know two LEGIT cases
you know TWO "legit" cases, therefore every single case there is must be exactly like the two you know
i'm not OP, but you sound plain retard

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We're coming(prepare yourselves) for all of you.
PIGGIES, PIGIES, PIGE -)

>>719972755
>it's very painful but I don't want to get rid of it... It's still part of who I am as a person.

That's Herpes, bub. Not schizophrenia.

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>>719972782
>FAKE Schizophrenic. Get fucked.

Thanks for the keks anon. You're adorable.

I'm 19. I've had the early signs since I was very small, and only since I was fifteen have the symptoms begun to mature. I'm losing it more and more every day, and I have no doubt soon I won't have such lucidity. I've spent hours and hours over countless weeks reading everything I could get my hands on about it, so that I could make at least a semi-informed decision in the meantime before I go see a professional.

This is an anonymous image board, I have no reason to lie about shit like this. If you choose to believe that, go for it. I really don't give a shit. I'm not here for your approval or sympathy or attention, I'm here for art and conversation. This thread has been posted many times and many times I've had very stimulating conversations. But please, continue to make assumptions based on a few posts. You know more than I do about what I feel, and how my mind works, otherwise you wouldn't be making an ass of yourself on public forum... right?

>>719972969
I know medical professionals will NOT diagnose someone as schizophrenia who simply has the occasional delusion auditory or visual.

You're full of shit.

How many times have you been involuntarily hospitalized?

>>719971616
Become edgy like OP. Schizos don't pride themselves in that degeneracy. I know as I've had a couple episodes but choose to keep it to myself.

>>719973176
You can not self diagnose ya dumb fuck. Never knew you were an expert, only an expert at looking at google and claiming you are.

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>>719972837
>>719972920
That's interesting. It doesn't go quite like that. Alright, look. You have your thoughts, right? You think a word, but you don't really hear it. Well there are a couple of thought processes that think like that, but I'm not the one thinking it. I "hear" it in the same way I hear my own thoughts, but they're from some other source inside my head. I don't involuntarily reply to them, but the problem is - they're in my head, they know how I react and what I really feel about what they say the moment I feel it. They know everything about me, and continue to use it against me. I'm not sure what you have, but that actually might be Schizophrenia as well. It isn't black and white, these things differ from person to person.

>>719972969
This.

>>719972982
>That's Herpes, bub. Not schizophrenia.

That's a shitty analogy, bub. Not clever.

>>719972920
You call this schizo? I call this mental retardation tbh.

>>719970154
well fuck, I write shit like that, I am schizophrenic? I cant really help myself sometimes, I just feel the urge to write the same thing over and over again everywhere. another odd thing ive wondered about is- I sometimes think my food and/or drink is poisoned, I know it probably isnt but for some reason the idea that it could be just keeps me from consuming it. another thing is, sometimes I wake up and if it happens to be extra quiet I begin to get stressed and think maybe my family has been kidnapped or, even crazier, that everybody on earth has just disappeared and I'm the only one left- I mean, I know these probably arent true but the idea they could be in those mornings is enough to give me a panic attack.

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>>719972888
The drug companies don't make any money if you don't take meds. You're getting your info from them. People have had schizophrenia for hundreds of thousands of years with no meds and have done just fine. There are alternative methods that have been proven to work just as well and in some cases better than antidepressants and antipsychotics. I am proof of that. And I never said I was fucking cured. I am much much better than I was even 5 years ago, and completely unmedicated. Don't be such a faggot. Do some digging and maybe listen to somebody who has come a long way in dealing with this illness while becoming less dependant on medication over time.

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>>719973315
This isn't about pride, nigger. This is about conversation that is therapeutic in a way. If I don't talk about it, and just bottle it up inside (like I normally do) it gets worse much faster. Isolation is the catalyst, and I'm just trying to distract myself for a few hours so I'm not frozen in my chair, terrified of shit that isn't real. Having a couple of episodes doesn't make you a Schizophrenic, so perhaps you shouldn't be making assumptions about shit you have no idea about.

>>719973439
Uh-huh. Yeah. We all care what you're saying, you should probably keep posting.

>>719973791
I'm sorry, where is your MD degree to diagnose yourself? Seriously, quite being an edgy attention whore faggot.

>>719973176
>This is an anonymous image board, I have no reason to lie about shit like this

You must be knew here.

Look, I am not claiming you don't have some issue. I don't know what it is, but I am certain it's not schizophrenia... at least at this point. OK, does that make you feel better?

As I stated, a diagnoses of schizophrenia will take a while because med professionals will make every effort to find other causes for the issues you are having. Can be depression which causes someone to have vivid daydreams/imagination.

You're lucudity is quite striking. If you had schizophrenia, you wouldn't even know it. BUT, what you WOULD have done if you were schizophrenic is you would have noticed your delusions and studied medical information enough to diagnoses yourself has NOT having schizophrenia.

You get my meaning?

I am not a professional, but I have talked to many, MANY professionals about it. I am having to deal with it on a regular basis because I have sister who is suffering from it. And in a bad way. It is a constant struggle to convince her that she is sick. She has been in and out of hospitals (always involuntary) a dozen times and she constantly changes donctor because they don't tell her what she wants to hear, that she's NOT SICK.

She even got violent and we were able to get her out of going to prison for assault by paying for a good attorney to get her admitted to medical treatment instead.

Sure, everyone is different, and people exhibit different levels of illness and their effects, but you don't sound like it.

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>>719973526
That just sounds like anxiety, my friend. You need to get that looked at, get on some benzos, they'll chill you out. Schizophrenia is different, you'd know if you had it. I'm talking about delusions that could never be real, and yet I can't help but to think it's absolute truth simply because of the magnitude of which I feel it.

>>719973649
How creative, you come up with that all by yourself?

>>719973475
Thank you for you insight anon. I'm scared as fuck that I'm going crazy but this only occurs during times of extreme stress, and started occurring after a traumatic experience so I tell myself there's a possibility of it just being a new response to anxiety and stress. An OCD reaction.

>>719973737
it's not even a valid diagnosis anymore bruh. you probably have schizotypal personality disorder or somethin. i'm guessin a sociopath and a narcisist aswell. glad you feel good but if your anything like a few people I know then you're probably hurting people around you when you go off the rails. get some help, get some meds man. and remember the symptoms you've got include fervent beliefs in things based on skewed internal logic. Drug companies are fucked up but that doesn't equate to your scripts bein wrong or your doctors being uneducated. peace man gl in life.

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>>719970154
Dyed black hair. Black eyeliner?
Do you own a black trench coat?

>>719973951
Yuup, keep going please. I'm so mad and angry, damn you're ruining my whole night.

Faggot. Kek

>>719973987
I understand what you're saying, I really do, and you have a valid point. My point is, I'm not that far gone yet. It just started to really take hold a couple of years ago, and lately it's been getting worse. I've done a lot of research on it, I'm not saying I'm an expert, but I made sure that I knew enough about it to arrive at the conclusion without reasonable doubt. I'm going to see someone, and if they tell me I don't have it, sure. I've read up on them, and Schizophrenia is the best fit so far.

Also, I'm not saying others don't lie here, I'm saying that I find it stupid.

>>719970154
I have a question.
Any problem with loose associations?
If yes, any specific examples you can share?

ZOMG, I'm OP and I'm CAAAARRRRRAAAAZZZZZYYYYY!!!

>>719974043
Yeah, if it's only when you're stressed out, it's just an anxiety disorder. You'll be fine. Schizophrenia is all the time, every day, all day, with very few "breaks" from it. Just relax, cut out some of the bullshit in your life, smoke some weed, make some changes, find happiness. It'll go away, anon. you just need to chill out.

>>719974238
K.

>>719974396
Brown hair no makeup because I'm not a faggot. Funny that you say that, I have a canvas trenchcoat laying around somewhere that was my father's then my older brother's and now it's mine. It's cold here, so I could probably wear it, but it's been sitting in the closet so long it has moldy shit on it I gotta wash. Ah well.

>>719973987
True.
I have PTSD and went to a psychologist cause i self diagnosed schizophrenia just like OP, i thought i had all the early symptoms lol.
Then he told me after a few months that i just had A LOT of anxiety and obsessive thoughts as well, but not schizophrenia.
After almost 6 months he told me that i wont get schizophrenia never, but maybe i will live with anxiety.

>>719974500
Quit samefag hating you cuck ass keyboard warrior faggot.

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>>719974459
Can you define loose associations for me? I'm sorry, I'm rather dense at times when it comes to that kind of shit. Sometimes I need people to spell shit out for me, my apologies.

>>719974500
NOT AS CAARRRAAZZZYY AS THESE PRICES! I'M SLASHING THEM DOWN 20%! THAT'S RIGHT! 20%! SO C-C-COME ON DOWN TO OSMOND'S USED CAR EMPORIUM TODAY!

>>719974404
Look man, I understand,. You're having some issues. IF, what you are saying is true. But let's get passed it.

STOP reading up on schizophrenia and trying to diagnose yourself with it. That's your fist fucking mistake. Make an appointment with a real psychotherapist with a PhD.

It's not a one time visit thing. Whatever issues you have they will help. If they feel it necessary, they will recommend a psychiatrist, an MD will prescribe some meds. Will mostly likely be some sort of anti-depressant.

You post on /b/ so I'm pretty sure you are fucked in the head, but not schizophrenia-level fucked in the head. If you were posting on /pol/ then I would confirm the latter.

Good luck you crazy kid.

>>719974955
I've read about many different disorders, I didn't just hone in on Schizophrenia until I was sure I had it. Thank you for the advice, and I'm going to see someone soon, but I'm not taking meds.

You too man, thank you.

>>719970154
I basically flushed down all my schizo medicine, I don't really believe I have it, just an excuse to get more customers it looks like to me. Besides the meds they gave me fucked me up way before I began, so what's the point?

>>719974872
no worries. I'll ask more direct questions.

>How quick are you to aggrivation?
>Do others have problems following your chain of reasoning?
>Do you feel it is difficult to communicate in a linear manner?

>>719974781
I am glad to hear that. Schizophrenia, full blown, is rare. It takes a LONG time to diagnose and there is a huge checklist that docs like to check off to give that diagnoses. Because it usually ends up having to prescribe the most powerful drugs to fucking sedate a human shirt of killing them.

As I said, and you confirm, there are many things that lead people to have "delusions" - sometimes it subconscious wishifull thinking. That is, having an imagination and living through it, to occupy yourself so you don't deal with whatever HELL you have in your life.

Therapy will help you deal with the bad things in your life so you can live in reality.

The thing about schizophrenia is you would NOT be able to distinguish reality from a delusion. The delusion IS reality, so you would not have the clarity of made to say, hey I have delusions, I'm schizophrenic... cool!

I hope the OP gets my meaning.

>>719974795
Go fuck your mother.

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>>719970154
“It appears his refusal to be intimidated
had the opposite effect… this in turn made [them] more angry and hostile”

OP here, gonna go smoke real quick. I'll be back soon.

>>719975269
It's likely then that you didn't have it or were misdiagnosed. What types of meds were you on?

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>all of these tryhard teenage roleplayers talking like goofballs
>IM A WILD CRAZY GUY SEND HELP SEND HELP SEND HELP HAHA

You're all embarrassing yourselves fam. I got a schizophrenia diagnoses four years ago. I took some anti-psychotic thing for a few weeks at first but I'm only on Vyvanse now for focus (lied about ADHD because Vyvanse sounded good.)

>>719972782
This 2bh.

FAKER
I WILL BEAT YOUR FUCKING ASS IF I KNEW WHERE YOU LIVED
YOU FUCKING LIAR
ATTENTION WORE
LIAR
WANNA BE FOR ATTENTION
PEICE OF LYING SHIT
FUCK
YOU
LIAR
LIAR
YOU PEICE OF SHIT
YOU DONT KNOW SHIT ABOUT SHIT FUCK YOU DIE
DIE YOU FUCKING STUPID FAT CUNT
FUCKIN SAMEFAGGING CUTN FUCKING DIE YOU FUCKING PEICE OF SHIT
DIE
GET CANCER
DIE

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>>719975447

i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, why u ,ad bro, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, why u ,ad bro, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad, i've always been mad, i know i've been mad, i'me nothing but mad,

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>>719973649
>>719974238
>>719975688

>>719975598
Lithium, Adderall, Prozac, Risperdone, Clonazapam, and some others I can't seem to remember. The one that did the most damage was the clonzapam as it almost made me attempt suicide and got me sent to a hospital. Then my mom made me go on Niacin but it only made me go to bed for long periods and made me incredibly itchy due to the amount of pills she made me take.

>>719975588
Schizophrenia or not. Whatever mental issue (mile or severe,) nicotine is not helping you. In fact it will exacerbate your issues/illness.

Any qualified med professional will tell you this. So if you want to help yourself, cut that shit out. The vaping too.

>>719976008
This

>>719975400
I've explained this three times now. I'm getting there, I'm less and less lucid every passing day, and the voices and the delusions get stronger. I'm not off the deep end yet, but it's coming. Yes, I am aware of my disorder at the moment, but that isn't going to be the case for much longer. I get what you're saying, and it's a perfectly valid point, but you have to understand what I'm saying.

>>719975509
That's... Very true, actually. In instances where they try to frighten or hurt me, the more I resist, the harder they try.

>>719975675
Maybe if you'd read the posts you wouldn't look like a fucktard.

>>719975688
>>719975808
Lots of asshats on tonight.

>>719976008
Yeah, I really should. I can't though, it does calm me down at least in the moment, it's the only thing I can do besides smoking weed to collect myself remotely. It makes it worse in the long run, but the slight instant relief is worth it.

>>719971482
Maybe if you stopped pretending to be schitz and just asked for related images you'd do better.

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>>719976120

I was talking about these guys you goof
>>719975688
>>719975808

>>719976244
Maybe if you'd look at all the replies you'd realize you talk like a fag and your shit's all retarded.

>>719975877
Well, son, I am VERY familiar will all the ones you listed as my sister has taken and is taking those meds at point or another,.

The problem we experience with her is that they will help, and she can come off the crazy enough to function but after 3-6 months she will revert. The body gets used to the meds. We constantly have to try and get her to adjust the meds, and she obviously is resistant.

Those meds are extremely powerfull and can make you a walking zombie. Depending on the dose, they are reserved for severe cases.

If you have been off them since 2013 and functioning, your posts here suggest to me you are doing well enough, I am happy to say you have been likely mis-diagnosed.

Nevertheless, I wish you luck.

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>>719976289
Kek my bad, after the bullshit I've witnessed on this thread I assumed it was another one of those. My apologies.

>>719976120
>Lots of asshats on tonight.
97% of that is from one guy samefagging

Anyway, I'm off. Good luck to OP and all the other crazy kids.

Wish you luck.

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>>719976511
Good point. Not sure if it's more or less pathetic that it's just one dude.

Samefag, apply pic related liberally to sensitive areas.

>>719976321
I dunno though honestly, there are times where I feel like someone is after me, and it pretty much started when I was in my late teenage years. I get fucking scared to sleep at night causing me to be drowsy in the day, I seen "shadow people" as I like to call them and saw animals throughout my house. I stopped brushing my teeth after I was 12, and hardly took showers or changed clothes. I then began hearing voices call out my name, they sound allot like my mother and father, and then other times they tell me to harm my younger siblings. That was pretty much the reason why I got those medications in the first place. Now I just get fucking angry over little things and throw a fit when it's medicine time. I still don't believe it's Schizophrenia though, could be just regular Dementia.

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>>719976597
The former

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>>719976816
Fair enough. Agreed.

OP here, gonna head off now. Probably play some vidya. Thank you for the conversations anons, I wish you all the best of luck. Goodnight.

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>>719977265
Have a good night man

Thanks for helping to put my mind at ease

>>719977311
Of course, you too anon.

>>719970154
>>719970154
Today after smoking ice for the first and last time on Saturday and being scat asf yesterday I realised I could argue with my inner dialogue and cravings that told me I wanted more. Smoked cones instead. I have an inner dialogue that gets me to do dumb shit all the time.

>>719975877

Oh man, fuck Risperidone. That shit messed me up good. Kinda went off the deep end couple years ago (grandma had lung cancer, watched her slowly get sicker and die) and wound up with a court ordered psych ward stay, diagnosed with major depression. They had me on prozac, trazadone, and risperidone. While i was on it i felt like a zombie. Just sat on the couch staring into space, mind felt fuzzy, if i tried to make conversation itd be like i could think what i wanted to say but couldnt get the words out. Also made it like impossible to cum. Eventually said fuck it and quit taking all of it. Been fine ever since

>>719977457
I have family history of schizophrenia from my uncle after he smoked too many cones.

>>719977681
Yeah, but sadly according to the court or some shit I'm required to be on meds so I flushed them all down.

>>719977761
*down the toilet.

>>719977777
Dub quints?!?

>>719977880
Yes, proof I did such thing.

>>719970154
Do crazy people know they're crazy?

>>719977928
Depends on the illness really, Schizophrenics are in denial or being tormented.

>>719977926
Are you the anon the prophets spoke of?

>>719977982
I dunno lol

>>719977777
god dammit

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>ITT OP pretending to have a disease that doesn't exist

>>719977777
the only worthwhile thing in this thread

>>719978004
Then gtfo faggot

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Take a psychedelic.

>>719977761

For me it turned out that i was court ordered to follow up on the meds after i got out, but i was only legally required to go to the one follow up. So after a couple appointments instead of scheduling another one i just walked right past the front desk and never made another appointment. I did the same and just threw that shit out

I have never been really diagnosed with Schizo but I have been hospitalized both involuntarily and voluntarily, treated for schizo/psycho episodes and given schizo/psycho meds.

I remember getting up at 3 in the morning, April 4th last year to go out and search for a suspicious car I had seen driving around my neighborhood. I sat on my bed dressing up when suddenly I heard the loudest, most evil, diabolical, devilish laugher in my life. I couldn't identify the source but I sat there waiting for my family and neighbors to wake up to the loud laugher, nobody woke up so I though "I'm crazy, it's all in my head". I went out and I felt a tremendous evil/doom and that I was being watched. I looked up to see what I can only describe as a flying living wrathful fire. The first thing that came to my head was "It's Satan, I'm fucked, we're all fucked" then I remembered God's name, Jehovah and rebuked the fire in the name of the LORD and it hurt it and calmed it down. I ignored and went to bed.

A couple of days lated I had an Apocalypse/Revelation, yes, like the book of Revelation and I heard thunders, say the sky close up, open up, saw spirits/angels/demons and I'm pretty sure one briefly posseded me or atleast tried to.

Now I consider myself a prophet. Believe in God and angels/spirits and our Lord Christ. Nothing will make me think otherwise, I think about God/spirits almost 24/7 and constantly wonder why I saw those things and why that happened to me. Who would want such a burden?

>TL;DR God exists, Schizo might be a medical diagnosis for paranormal phenomena sensitive people or "chosen ones"