>>719970154 question. Do you actually see hallucinations? Also do you feel the movie; A beautiful Mind was a good depiction of what being Schizophrenic is like? I don't have any art like that so heres a pepe
I don't believe you. I have met two people with legit schizophrenia and even when they are on sufficient meds that allow them to sort of function in society, they still actually believe the delusional they have. They just have been taught to suppress them as "delusions."
>>719971681 A few times, but it isn't on a regular basis or anything. It's all in my head, mostly auditory, and yet I don't actually "hear" them most of the time.
>>719971720 I don't see things that often at all, but I have before. I haven't seen that movie yet, so I couldn't tell you. Most of what I've seen television and movies portray Schizophrenia is wrong. I don't see dead people, I don't hear statues talk to me and tell me to kill my whole family. I have a few (three to be exact) parallel thought process in my head that "think" to me. They have their own identities and personalities, and it isn't a positive thing when they interact with me. Thank you for the pepe anon, have another.
>>719972078 I'm extremely delusional, it's getting harder and harder every day to suppress them as delusions as you said. While intellectually I know it's preposterous, I can't shake the feeling that I'm a god. Like I have and abundance of dormant power that I could use if I just knew how. I'm very paranoid, and for instance a couple of years ago, my ex (gf at the time) made me cookies and brought them to me, and after she left (and I had already eaten them) I was overcome with so much paranoia, I actually called her and asked her if she was trying to poison me.
>>719970154 OP I'm 38 and was diagnosed with schizophrenia at age 21. It can get better with hard work and time. I am unmedicated now since 2013. It's not perfect, but I'm working my fucking ass off. You don't need to suffer with a "broken" brain forever dude.
>>719972521 It sucks, it's very painful but I don't want to get rid of it... It's still part of who I am as a person. I can't connect with others, I look at even my girlfriend, or my mother, and I can't comprehend that they are conscious like I am, that they exist. I'm extremely lonely, and these things in my head are the only company I have. I can't just rip them out, they're a part of me. I'm afraid to get better, I don't know why. I think of taking meds or even just using other methods, and it makes me anxious.
>>719972325 >I'm extremely delusional, it's getting harder and harder every day to suppress them as delusions as you said. While intellectually I know it's preposterous, I can't shake the feeling that I'm a god. Like I have and abundance of dormant power that I could use if I just knew how. I'm very paranoid, and for instance a couple of years ago, my ex (gf at the time) made me cookies and brought them to me, and after she left (and I had already eaten them) I was overcome with so much paranoia, I actually called her and asked her if she was trying to poison me.
FAKE Schizophrenic. Get fucked. A real schizo would not diagnose him/herself with such lucidity.
Again, I will state very plain and simply I know two LEGIT cases. One was a women who was once a real MD, who had a psychiatric break and lost her license.
The second case was someone who at first was diagnosed "bi-polar with delusions." At any rate, I know/knew (one has since died) very well and YOU exhibit the signs of a mentally disturbed fuckhead, but not schizophrenia. You're a wannabe.
>>719972093 >mostly auditory, and yet I don't actually "hear" them most of the time.
Elaborate. For the last few years I've been suffering from something similar in which I imagine conversations, as though something is said to me or as if I'm approaching someone with a subject and I'll involuntarily vocally reply to my imagination
Earlier tonight for example I was talking to someone and said something that along the lines of: if you don't go to the damn doctor I'm gonna knock you out and drag you there. I imagined someone outside of the context of the conversation hearing it, and I involuntarily vocally replied "it was just a joke don't take it out of context"
Every time I do this I think to myself what the fuck? Why are you answering your imagination?
>>719972837 And I hope that went without saying I've never experienced an auditory or visual hallucination. Simply imagine conversations and involuntarily reply or say out loud what I was planning on saying.
I'm 19. I've had the early signs since I was very small, and only since I was fifteen have the symptoms begun to mature. I'm losing it more and more every day, and I have no doubt soon I won't have such lucidity. I've spent hours and hours over countless weeks reading everything I could get my hands on about it, so that I could make at least a semi-informed decision in the meantime before I go see a professional.
This is an anonymous image board, I have no reason to lie about shit like this. If you choose to believe that, go for it. I really don't give a shit. I'm not here for your approval or sympathy or attention, I'm here for art and conversation. This thread has been posted many times and many times I've had very stimulating conversations. But please, continue to make assumptions based on a few posts. You know more than I do about what I feel, and how my mind works, otherwise you wouldn't be making an ass of yourself on public forum... right?
>>719972837 >>719972920 That's interesting. It doesn't go quite like that. Alright, look. You have your thoughts, right? You think a word, but you don't really hear it. Well there are a couple of thought processes that think like that, but I'm not the one thinking it. I "hear" it in the same way I hear my own thoughts, but they're from some other source inside my head. I don't involuntarily reply to them, but the problem is - they're in my head, they know how I react and what I really feel about what they say the moment I feel it. They know everything about me, and continue to use it against me. I'm not sure what you have, but that actually might be Schizophrenia as well. It isn't black and white, these things differ from person to person.
>>719970154 well fuck, I write shit like that, I am schizophrenic? I cant really help myself sometimes, I just feel the urge to write the same thing over and over again everywhere. another odd thing ive wondered about is- I sometimes think my food and/or drink is poisoned, I know it probably isnt but for some reason the idea that it could be just keeps me from consuming it. another thing is, sometimes I wake up and if it happens to be extra quiet I begin to get stressed and think maybe my family has been kidnapped or, even crazier, that everybody on earth has just disappeared and I'm the only one left- I mean, I know these probably arent true but the idea they could be in those mornings is enough to give me a panic attack.
>>719972888 The drug companies don't make any money if you don't take meds. You're getting your info from them. People have had schizophrenia for hundreds of thousands of years with no meds and have done just fine. There are alternative methods that have been proven to work just as well and in some cases better than antidepressants and antipsychotics. I am proof of that. And I never said I was fucking cured. I am much much better than I was even 5 years ago, and completely unmedicated. Don't be such a faggot. Do some digging and maybe listen to somebody who has come a long way in dealing with this illness while becoming less dependant on medication over time.
>>719973315 This isn't about pride, nigger. This is about conversation that is therapeutic in a way. If I don't talk about it, and just bottle it up inside (like I normally do) it gets worse much faster. Isolation is the catalyst, and I'm just trying to distract myself for a few hours so I'm not frozen in my chair, terrified of shit that isn't real. Having a couple of episodes doesn't make you a Schizophrenic, so perhaps you shouldn't be making assumptions about shit you have no idea about.
>>719973439 Uh-huh. Yeah. We all care what you're saying, you should probably keep posting.
>>719973176 >This is an anonymous image board, I have no reason to lie about shit like this
You must be knew here.
Look, I am not claiming you don't have some issue. I don't know what it is, but I am certain it's not schizophrenia... at least at this point. OK, does that make you feel better?
As I stated, a diagnoses of schizophrenia will take a while because med professionals will make every effort to find other causes for the issues you are having. Can be depression which causes someone to have vivid daydreams/imagination.
You're lucudity is quite striking. If you had schizophrenia, you wouldn't even know it. BUT, what you WOULD have done if you were schizophrenic is you would have noticed your delusions and studied medical information enough to diagnoses yourself has NOT having schizophrenia.
You get my meaning?
I am not a professional, but I have talked to many, MANY professionals about it. I am having to deal with it on a regular basis because I have sister who is suffering from it. And in a bad way. It is a constant struggle to convince her that she is sick. She has been in and out of hospitals (always involuntary) a dozen times and she constantly changes donctor because they don't tell her what she wants to hear, that she's NOT SICK.
She even got violent and we were able to get her out of going to prison for assault by paying for a good attorney to get her admitted to medical treatment instead.
Sure, everyone is different, and people exhibit different levels of illness and their effects, but you don't sound like it.
>>719973526 That just sounds like anxiety, my friend. You need to get that looked at, get on some benzos, they'll chill you out. Schizophrenia is different, you'd know if you had it. I'm talking about delusions that could never be real, and yet I can't help but to think it's absolute truth simply because of the magnitude of which I feel it.
>>719973649 How creative, you come up with that all by yourself?
>>719973475 Thank you for you insight anon. I'm scared as fuck that I'm going crazy but this only occurs during times of extreme stress, and started occurring after a traumatic experience so I tell myself there's a possibility of it just being a new response to anxiety and stress. An OCD reaction.
>>719973737 it's not even a valid diagnosis anymore bruh. you probably have schizotypal personality disorder or somethin. i'm guessin a sociopath and a narcisist aswell. glad you feel good but if your anything like a few people I know then you're probably hurting people around you when you go off the rails. get some help, get some meds man. and remember the symptoms you've got include fervent beliefs in things based on skewed internal logic. Drug companies are fucked up but that doesn't equate to your scripts bein wrong or your doctors being uneducated. peace man gl in life.
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>>719973951 Yuup, keep going please. I'm so mad and angry, damn you're ruining my whole night.
>>719973987 I understand what you're saying, I really do, and you have a valid point. My point is, I'm not that far gone yet. It just started to really take hold a couple of years ago, and lately it's been getting worse. I've done a lot of research on it, I'm not saying I'm an expert, but I made sure that I knew enough about it to arrive at the conclusion without reasonable doubt. I'm going to see someone, and if they tell me I don't have it, sure. I've read up on them, and Schizophrenia is the best fit so far.
Also, I'm not saying others don't lie here, I'm saying that I find it stupid.
>>719974043 Yeah, if it's only when you're stressed out, it's just an anxiety disorder. You'll be fine. Schizophrenia is all the time, every day, all day, with very few "breaks" from it. Just relax, cut out some of the bullshit in your life, smoke some weed, make some changes, find happiness. It'll go away, anon. you just need to chill out.
>>719974396 Brown hair no makeup because I'm not a faggot. Funny that you say that, I have a canvas trenchcoat laying around somewhere that was my father's then my older brother's and now it's mine. It's cold here, so I could probably wear it, but it's been sitting in the closet so long it has moldy shit on it I gotta wash. Ah well.
>>719973987 True. I have PTSD and went to a psychologist cause i self diagnosed schizophrenia just like OP, i thought i had all the early symptoms lol. Then he told me after a few months that i just had A LOT of anxiety and obsessive thoughts as well, but not schizophrenia. After almost 6 months he told me that i wont get schizophrenia never, but maybe i will live with anxiety.
>>719974404 Look man, I understand,. You're having some issues. IF, what you are saying is true. But let's get passed it.
STOP reading up on schizophrenia and trying to diagnose yourself with it. That's your fist fucking mistake. Make an appointment with a real psychotherapist with a PhD.
It's not a one time visit thing. Whatever issues you have they will help. If they feel it necessary, they will recommend a psychiatrist, an MD will prescribe some meds. Will mostly likely be some sort of anti-depressant.
You post on /b/ so I'm pretty sure you are fucked in the head, but not schizophrenia-level fucked in the head. If you were posting on /pol/ then I would confirm the latter.
>>719974955 I've read about many different disorders, I didn't just hone in on Schizophrenia until I was sure I had it. Thank you for the advice, and I'm going to see someone soon, but I'm not taking meds.
>>719970154 I basically flushed down all my schizo medicine, I don't really believe I have it, just an excuse to get more customers it looks like to me. Besides the meds they gave me fucked me up way before I began, so what's the point?
>>719974781 I am glad to hear that. Schizophrenia, full blown, is rare. It takes a LONG time to diagnose and there is a huge checklist that docs like to check off to give that diagnoses. Because it usually ends up having to prescribe the most powerful drugs to fucking sedate a human shirt of killing them.
As I said, and you confirm, there are many things that lead people to have "delusions" - sometimes it subconscious wishifull thinking. That is, having an imagination and living through it, to occupy yourself so you don't deal with whatever HELL you have in your life.
Therapy will help you deal with the bad things in your life so you can live in reality.
The thing about schizophrenia is you would NOT be able to distinguish reality from a delusion. The delusion IS reality, so you would not have the clarity of made to say, hey I have delusions, I'm schizophrenic... cool!
>all of these tryhard teenage roleplayers talking like goofballs >IM A WILD CRAZY GUY SEND HELP SEND HELP SEND HELP HAHA
You're all embarrassing yourselves fam. I got a schizophrenia diagnoses four years ago. I took some anti-psychotic thing for a few weeks at first but I'm only on Vyvanse now for focus (lied about ADHD because Vyvanse sounded good.)
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>>719975598 Lithium, Adderall, Prozac, Risperdone, Clonazapam, and some others I can't seem to remember. The one that did the most damage was the clonzapam as it almost made me attempt suicide and got me sent to a hospital. Then my mom made me go on Niacin but it only made me go to bed for long periods and made me incredibly itchy due to the amount of pills she made me take.
>>719975400 I've explained this three times now. I'm getting there, I'm less and less lucid every passing day, and the voices and the delusions get stronger. I'm not off the deep end yet, but it's coming. Yes, I am aware of my disorder at the moment, but that isn't going to be the case for much longer. I get what you're saying, and it's a perfectly valid point, but you have to understand what I'm saying.
>>719975509 That's... Very true, actually. In instances where they try to frighten or hurt me, the more I resist, the harder they try.
>>719975675 Maybe if you'd read the posts you wouldn't look like a fucktard.
>>719976008 Yeah, I really should. I can't though, it does calm me down at least in the moment, it's the only thing I can do besides smoking weed to collect myself remotely. It makes it worse in the long run, but the slight instant relief is worth it.
>>719975877 Well, son, I am VERY familiar will all the ones you listed as my sister has taken and is taking those meds at point or another,.
The problem we experience with her is that they will help, and she can come off the crazy enough to function but after 3-6 months she will revert. The body gets used to the meds. We constantly have to try and get her to adjust the meds, and she obviously is resistant.
Those meds are extremely powerfull and can make you a walking zombie. Depending on the dose, they are reserved for severe cases.
If you have been off them since 2013 and functioning, your posts here suggest to me you are doing well enough, I am happy to say you have been likely mis-diagnosed.
>>719976321 I dunno though honestly, there are times where I feel like someone is after me, and it pretty much started when I was in my late teenage years. I get fucking scared to sleep at night causing me to be drowsy in the day, I seen "shadow people" as I like to call them and saw animals throughout my house. I stopped brushing my teeth after I was 12, and hardly took showers or changed clothes. I then began hearing voices call out my name, they sound allot like my mother and father, and then other times they tell me to harm my younger siblings. That was pretty much the reason why I got those medications in the first place. Now I just get fucking angry over little things and throw a fit when it's medicine time. I still don't believe it's Schizophrenia though, could be just regular Dementia.
>>719970154 >>719970154 Today after smoking ice for the first and last time on Saturday and being scat asf yesterday I realised I could argue with my inner dialogue and cravings that told me I wanted more. Smoked cones instead. I have an inner dialogue that gets me to do dumb shit all the time.
Oh man, fuck Risperidone. That shit messed me up good. Kinda went off the deep end couple years ago (grandma had lung cancer, watched her slowly get sicker and die) and wound up with a court ordered psych ward stay, diagnosed with major depression. They had me on prozac, trazadone, and risperidone. While i was on it i felt like a zombie. Just sat on the couch staring into space, mind felt fuzzy, if i tried to make conversation itd be like i could think what i wanted to say but couldnt get the words out. Also made it like impossible to cum. Eventually said fuck it and quit taking all of it. Been fine ever since
For me it turned out that i was court ordered to follow up on the meds after i got out, but i was only legally required to go to the one follow up. So after a couple appointments instead of scheduling another one i just walked right past the front desk and never made another appointment. I did the same and just threw that shit out
I have never been really diagnosed with Schizo but I have been hospitalized both involuntarily and voluntarily, treated for schizo/psycho episodes and given schizo/psycho meds.
I remember getting up at 3 in the morning, April 4th last year to go out and search for a suspicious car I had seen driving around my neighborhood. I sat on my bed dressing up when suddenly I heard the loudest, most evil, diabolical, devilish laugher in my life. I couldn't identify the source but I sat there waiting for my family and neighbors to wake up to the loud laugher, nobody woke up so I though "I'm crazy, it's all in my head". I went out and I felt a tremendous evil/doom and that I was being watched. I looked up to see what I can only describe as a flying living wrathful fire. The first thing that came to my head was "It's Satan, I'm fucked, we're all fucked" then I remembered God's name, Jehovah and rebuked the fire in the name of the LORD and it hurt it and calmed it down. I ignored and went to bed.
A couple of days lated I had an Apocalypse/Revelation, yes, like the book of Revelation and I heard thunders, say the sky close up, open up, saw spirits/angels/demons and I'm pretty sure one briefly posseded me or atleast tried to.
Now I consider myself a prophet. Believe in God and angels/spirits and our Lord Christ. Nothing will make me think otherwise, I think about God/spirits almost 24/7 and constantly wonder why I saw those things and why that happened to me. Who would want such a burden?
>TL;DR God exists, Schizo might be a medical diagnosis for paranormal phenomena sensitive people or "chosen ones"
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