ITT: small things you think only you do.

listen to philisophical audio books till i fall asleep

>>719744095
Pull my ass cheeks apart when I sit to take a shit.

>>719744095
Eat crisps (or for the Americans: chips) with a spoon from a bowl for not to get my hands greasy.

>>719744186
Do this too

>>719744095

Fuck my girlfriend

I print photos of my friend and put them in my underwear before hanging out with them

>>719744233
Fuck yeah, I'm not alone.

>>719744278

>think
being the critical word there

>>719744095
pluck one hair out of eyebrows, puts it in the jar, when jar becomes full, i eat it

>>719744226
I eat them like a lizard, i also smell my fingers after touching balls/ass/pits

>>719744440
The jar, or the hair?

>>719744186
I do this, I'm keeping that ass as clean as possible

>>719744383

Anyone else is welcome to the sweaty four-eyed ginger hippo if they want her kek

>>719744312
have heard this one before, fucking why?

I smell the toilet paper after wiping away my swamp ass

>>719744657
aw hell no

I prefer to listen to music at different pitches. When listening to music I open up the Realtek audio manager and using the karaoke function I change the pitch of sounds on my computer depending on what I am listening to. Most of the time I change the pitch to -3 or +1.

>>719744095
Listen to people speak different languages on the train, I know 4.

>>719744440
this is why god didn't give you qints

Eat my cum every time after I jerk off

>>719744716
thats sort of interesting. I used to dj, and you are constantly messing with pitch/speed. You are probably also changing the key the song is in right? you might be subconsciously adjusting them to be in a matching key ( which sounds better )

>>719744560
i do. I'm married and want some ugly nerdy college aged girl to fuck on the side.

>>719744655
I do it because I want them to stay friends with me

>>719744879

Dismantle /generals/.

>>719744893
what would you do if they found out

>>719744715
It's intoxicating

>>719745091
Why would they find out
The pictures are in my underpants

>>719744716
Yep, I do that too.

I will take a slice of cheddar cheese, cover it in pickles, and add a second slice of cheddar. Breadless sandwich

>>719745148

you must have a backup story though just in case they ever do. what would you tell them?

>>719744186
same

>>719744186
need to try this

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>>719744186
Same here too.

>>719745231
I don't know I'd probably deny the pictures are here
Like "no man there are no pictures in my underpants what the fuck"
Until they accept that there are no pictures

I smell my finger everytime i touch my balls,ass,nose,back of the ear,arm pit or any part of my body that produce bad smell

>wipe my ass even if I don't shit. I have to take trips just to wipe ass
>use nail/cutical pusher to clean out earwax
>chew soda can tabs, fold with teeth
>sometimes fap to extremely zoomed in pics of friend's tits, like pixel level zoom

i'm a guy and i wear panties under my guy clothes

Discovered only yesterday:
>ltake shit about noon
>some light activity afternoon to get slightly sweat
>shower in the evening
>while in shower, dont clean your ass on purpose, only quick stream of water to it
>go out, stay in bathroom
>hairdry your ass
>tfw godlike smell, disgusting and fascinating at the same time fills the whole bathroom

Everytime i pick my booger, i make into a ball using my palms before trhrowing them

I type out copy pasta manually.

>>719744186
everytime. im not a damn savage

>>719745515
wtf the last one

>>719745566
kek

i grow one fingernail out really long for the sole purpose of scraping shit out of my nose and ears

>>719744095
tell which way the clouds are going

>>719745577
Dunno bro, zoomed pussy doesn't do it for me either. Gotta be the nipple. I've fapped to the top of the asscrack too, coin slot

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>>719744095
>become friends with underage girl on random mmo
>make catfish pro before catfishing was popular
>develop friendship with girl
>develop relationship with girl
>get her to send nudes/vids
>build up a massive collection over the years
>make a new catfish pro with her pics
>use catfish pro to get neckbeards and white knights to buy me games on steam and give me in game money of current game i'm playing at the time
>now using the catfish pro of girl to try to get my gf's teen cousin to show me his cock erect in his little sister's panties
fuck you /b/

>>719744162
Give me some sources dude
I'm begging you

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When I use mouthwash, I make fists with my hands and throw my head back and and howl like a werewolf.

>>719745951
Thanks for the kek anon

Rape my sister occasionally

I eat out and fuck my 12 yo sis almost daily

Sometimes, when I have a shower, I shake the shower gel onto my face to get the feeling of taking a huge cum facial.

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I sit in the bathroom with the lights off and the shower on, drink and lurk on 4chan

I have to blow off the cigarette filter before I smoke.

>>719744186
Just tried this. Ass was perfectly clean but it felt to be more painful than usually. But yea, as they say: No pain no gain

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I spray the toilet with desinfectant, bleach, clorox, or whatever after every shit. I like my bathroom to smell and tofeel clean always.

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Whenever I get a drawing capcha I always draw cocks.

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>Britfag
Help, I can't start threads on any 4chan boards!

>>719744718
Seems like you're alone here buddy

Aim my piss one side where the water meets the bowl to start whirlpool of piss.

>>719745177
Are the pickles sliced or whole? What kind? Dill? Need more details about this. How's it taste?

>>719745523
This is truly autistic

>>719746742

Yup

>>719744312
>>719744440
>>719744792
>>719745177
>>719745523
>>719745713
>>719745940
>>719746355
Runner ups here

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I subconsciously say things in a way that makes me sound like an asshole or I'm being insincere and I can't help it. in my mind I'm having a perfect conversation, but when I look back at what I say I just feel awful.

Go to the freezer, and just breathe in the super cold air coming out of the top vent. Because it feels good

>>719746610
This is probably a good thing.

>>719747177
you're just a faggot

>>719747177
Can't wait for pic related to become a movie

>>719744186
Doing this as we speak lol.

>>719746742
I do this only to reduce the sound of my piss hitting the water

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>>719747303
Oh.
>>719747310
Or at least a goddamn Netflix series

>>719747227
Didn't mean to write that like a command, but if you guys want to do so feel free

masturbate

>>719747481
You sick fuck.

>>719747177
Welcome to the spectrum of mild autism, come join us! :)

>>719747481
In the missionary position for the sole purpose of not procreating?

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Use the term "glossopoeia" instead of "c*********".

>>>/trash/7330888

>>719745515
>still taking soda in 2017

>>719744095
Pick the dirt from underneath my nails then roll it into a ball then smash it and smell it.

>>719745321
Aw man you had a good thing going there, now we know your just trolling. Biggest disappointment of 2017 so far.

>>719747777
Quads of disgustingness

>>719747564
I always thought about it. I've even asked my closest friends and relatives if I have ever seems a little "off" 100% of them saI'd that there wasn't anything wrong with me. In a way, none of them answered my question. I smoked weed with a friend once and thought that I was actually an actual ChromosonePotato.jpg. I seriously thought my entire life was a lie and that I'm seeing myself as a 7/10 handsome was just a hoax and I can't actual see my down syndrome face.
I mean, I could be wrong, or just fucking paranoid. I dunno

I rip out the hair around my asshole. Like, I roll it between my fingers until i get a nice firm grip and rip it out in one tug.

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>>719745466
Me too

Il spend 20 minutes picking my nose to get the deep ones out, instead of 2 seconds to blow it because pulling out a large booger is extremely satisfying

>>719744095
Jerk off every night immediately before trying to sleep.

>>719744792
I used to do that as a kid.

>>719748555
Yup, helps me sleep

>>719745515
>>I have to take trips just to wipe ass
Nigger, you didn't take trips at all. You didn't even take doubles here. No wiping for you, I guess

>>719748348
Same, I also do this with my pit hair.

>>719748555
This is something literally everone does

ive collected my nails for the paste six or so months

its so calming, i love looking at them and shaking the jar to hear them hitting the side of it. also reminds me of time passing

>>719749005
I would love to know the reaction of another person if they found them

>>719748516
And then eating those!!.
Godlike!!

>>719747347
same here

>>719749127
like, they dont really look like nails.

looks sorta like lots of little pieces of clear string, i cant grow them out, feels horrible

>>719746402
>>719746402
I do the same, also flip over a lucky cigarette when I just open a pack

>>719744186
Do this as well but I think it makes your ass bleed when its a bigger shit

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>>719744095
I'm always the guy that everyone relies on during socials. You know, the average Asian kid that didn't get bullied but didn't really have any friends.
So this was something that happened last year. Let's call this guy Ben for now.

>At high school meet up
>almost everyone came
>ben walks up to me
>"hey anon, I know this is sudden, but can you stay over there and say "oui oui" when I signal you?"
>be good guy
>agree
>walk over to the drink stand to get myself a drink
>Ben talking with one of the girls
>calls out to me, says something in French or German
>winks
>"oui oui"
>girls look at me strangely
>"I never knew anon spoke French"
>shit.jpg
>ben looks at me strangely
>excuse myself awkwardly to go to the bathroom
>make a run for it to my car
>never saw them again

Pic unrelated

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>>719744095
>wear multiple layers of clothing, all the time
Comfy as fuck, dude. It never helps in warm weather, but worth it otherwise.

>>719745940
You're a god

>>719744226
I use a fork, get better gribage with it.

>>719748555
Is there another way to sleep without a plastic bag?

>>719748157
Well you don't have to be full on potato applesauce when there's some autism going on.
I just made a hypothesis from what you said that you sometimes sort of struggle in getting your message across the way you (actually) want to but sound like an asshole anyway.
I recognise this from myself too and some other things like I find it hard to sincerely sympathise with people, sometimes not being able to understand if something's being meant literally or in a figure of speech or just small struggling in any general social interaction is luckily over the years been reduced to about 20%, but was hard for me as a kid.

What I'm trying to say is, you might have a mild form in the spectrum of autism but that doesn't mean you are an insta-tard, just that interpretation and some social skills are proven difficult.

Ps. Sorry for ranting my life story :/

When I have to fart, I cup it in my hand and smell it immediately after to see if it was a good one

>>719746751
Sliced dill pickles. and it has optimal crunch. Preferably actual cheddar slices. 10/10

Place a wet cloth beneigth my laptop for thermal conduction

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>>719744095
When I get really excited I squiggle my hands together

been doing it ever since I was a kid

it looks like... if you were mecha godzilla trying to unwrap a hershy kiss at incredible hihg speeds


I have been trying to hide this for years, but I know people notice me doing it out of the corner of their eyes. I have to pretend I'm cracking my knuckles. I think it works.

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>Cut out chunk of cheese
>wrap cheese in ham or other sliced meats
>heat under grill until the cheese has melted
Delicious

>>719750233
do this

>>719749255
huh?

>>719748990
>>719748555
>>719749499
I don't. I can't lie down after ejaculating. My prostate burns really bad when I do that.

>>719746610
Do you use your phone's hotspot to browse?
Because that's typically why you can't post

I act like a 12 year old girl when I'm in love. Needless to say I'm a kissless virgin because of that.

>>719744278
We all fuck your girlfriend, Anon.

>>719744440
Bullshit. Post pic of jar. Also, why not pubes?

>Get Peanut butter
>Get bread
>PB sandwich
>Heat up in microwave for 20-30 seconds
Done it since I was 5, 21 years later

>>719744095
Think

I like to stetch out my nutsack and feel the ridges

I am married and I frequently text women I know hoping that them maybe want to have sex with me.

I like to message married men and like to lead them on

>>719749244
Same. Gotta get the little tobacco flakes off. Also it's just bad luck not to flip a lucky

>>719744716
I do that sometimes. Sometimes I slow down the song in audacity and listen to that.

I plan and predict conversations . I use what I know about the person to predict reactions.

>>719744095
Pretend I'm on the Truman show

>>719752913
In order to make other women want a married man they must first be extremely attracted to you as well as be jealous of your wife. Go to gym, be good to your woman, temptation will come knocking after you're happy, but not before.