was there any reason you stayed a janitor? like some significant life choices that led to you being stuck as a janitor or the only work you can find. also what is the nastiest shit you have had to deal with on the job
for the most part, finances have kept me where i am. i dropped outta high school for family-related reasons and sorta just fell into a general pattern ever since. im fairly happy, though--when i dont work i just read a lot, so i haven't had much impetus to move (i live in north dakota, btw), especially given costs and the fact that the only other job i could probably find would be janitorial work
honestly, i haven't encountered anything tremendously bizarre or nasty. i work in a complex that houses a couple fairly middle-class firms, so apart from finding used condoms in randomly hidden places (behind copiers, etc), not much to report
not really. i like art a lot, but i can't really afford to make the pilgrimage to really appreciate it, so i've built my own little cult of images. i know the whole problem with art "in the age of mechanical reproduction," etc., but actually from the vantage point of someone burdened by paucity, it really offers access that i wouldnt otherwise have, thats all
i dunno really what makes one "cultured" or not. i doubt being a janitor contributes to that image. like i said, i like to read a lot, though.
thanks, that's nice of you. it hasn't been so far, but of course if things get too rough, i'll consider other options. again, not quite sure what those would be, but i guess i'll cross that bridge when i arrive at it.
what do you do? do you enjoy your work? would you say you work--or do you labor?
yeah i really love the alone time, too. that's actually why i do it, for the most part. plus, the area is clean enough, and is such a finite space, that my usual tasks only take hours, and i spend the rest of the time reading. not a bad gig.
>>719000995 not for those who like cities, warmth, "high culture" (or what i imagine it to be), or human interaction that reaches beneath the superficial. if, however, you enjoy wide open spaces, introspection, an unkempt frontier that is somewhere between a dream and the waking hearth--then yeah, id invite you to check it out. north dakota is not so much a place as it is a state of mind.
>>719001081 Oh, boy, now we're getting into stuff I'm ashamed of. My oxy habit got out of control several years ago, and I needed more money. So I started doing my own selling as well as trafficking stuff for people my dealer knows. That's how I make ends meet today.
Actually I'm in one of my clean periods at the moment. I've kicked and restarted like a half-dozen times. I tend to go 6-12 months on, then a few months off before I start up again.
i've been addicted before, too, anon. not to oxy but another opioid. it certainly contributed to my current situation; but now that i'm out, i swear to god am never going back to the desert. i honestly wish you all the best, and feel for you--i know it doesn't matter, but if i could leave you with one thing, it would be to kick it and never look back. but fuck me if it were that easy, right? good luck, anon. i love you.
>>719002432 a whole range. my current playlist includes LCD soundsystem, rolling stones, the animals, TV on the radio, majical coudz; the xx; alabama shakes; glass animals; nina simone; alexander; etc.
>>718999285 Custodial janitorial supervisor reporting in. I live in one of the brokest states in the U.S., so everything is cheap where I live. I can go to junior college and learn how to electrical and plumb and shit but why? i'll only be making a couple dollars more than i am now, so i'm good until something very awesome comes along.
yes, i do. as odd as it sounds, i imagine what it would be like to teach, especially at the university level or something like that. i think to be paid to read, synthesize ideas, and then write your own is something like the ideal human existence to me. i've actually amassed something of a personal library and am pretty well read in several fields--of course its all pure irony and doesn't matter in the least, but i still dream...
apart from that, i have a design for a multilateral intentional institution aimed at alleviating things like cancer and illness (one of my major intellectual influences have been the christian pansophist utopians of the modrn era--bacon, campanella, andrae, leibniz, etc., and i dream myself as their compatriot and admirer). but i imagine that everyone has their own evangelical schemes, and mine is no different in its desire to change the world, so yeah.
I was once a janitor. Night shift. After a couple weeks it began to ware on me. Seeing shit and vomit every day, having to clean it up began to bring out the worst in me. No respect, people would hardly make eye contact with me.
Chin up, I'm no longer a janitor but I am still home alone on a Saturday night.
thanks, i'll take that as a compliment, i suppose. i like to watch youtube, but as far as my own channel or twitter or anything, i'm a total luddite, and wouldn't even know the first thing of setting shit up to be honest. plus there's also the problem that i wouldn't have much to say extemp and generally hate attention like that.
do you use any social media like that? and i'm curious: what made you think that about me?
>>719004573 that sounds pretty chill. I'm pretty rusty on philosophy but I got a lot out of Foucault and Wittgenstein. honestly if you felt like it you could work your way up through a grad program and make the connections you'd want to do that. work with nonprofits, get connections, that's the game. least out here in california where i'm at.
ambition? i dunno. is it weird to say that I kinda just have my worldview and feel like anything i do with it is just gonna snowball and get as big as I want it to? like i have a novel I'm writing, i'm going to grad school for journalism, everything i do feels like it's already at the level I need it to be.
appreciate the Watteau and Freidrich, by the way. Goya's my favorite.
>>719005865 oh i love both wittgenstein and foucault! not sure if you can see it, but here's my shelf devoted to wittgenstein.
i really appreciate the advice, but the thing is i don't even have a high school degree. the world of making connections, of non-profits and grad school is pretty much a separate universe to me; i might as well be trying to go to mars. but i'm also fine with that, and am happy.
what's your novel about? do you enjoy grad school? do you write articles now?
that's awesome! honestly, i barely read anything anymore. i don't know why. like, I read Moby Dick the year before last and i read it over the entire year.
honestly, when you've been in any inner circle or privileged place long enough you kind of realize it's kind of a self-absorbed little bubble and whatever you did to get in doesn't matter. i had a pretty roundabout way of getting in. i'd rather not disclose because identity but if you want in somewhere just do something that'll get their attention. that's seriously it.
novel's about what growing up during bush jr. was like. trying to like, explain what people where i grew up felt like. it was a complicated place. like, i saw a lot of modern internet culture spring up, i saw people get obsessed over all this stuff and i saw what they were hiding from.
yeah, I'm writing articles. doing photography, radio, videos and multimedia stuff too. it's nice. i feel like writing for journalism means i take all the language barriers academic writing puts in your way and tears them down. i never feel pressured to be an expert.
>>719008822 can't be a reporter without writing about current events! helping with a documentary that's more historical/legacy biopic stuff right now, though but it's 90% current events in my field.
my full name and contact info are all over my work. i'd send you something encrypted to contact me with, but the guy who was helping me with computer security lessons and all that stuff hasn't gotten back to me. if you see someone on /b/ saying they're a journalist good chance it'll be me though. i've been trying to use my time on 4chan to come up with an article for a minute.
i'm in the bay area now. hope it stays that way but it's not cheap here. grew up somewhere else that's a lot more x-files. i could go for a beer, for sure.
no, not particularly. i thoroughly enjoy this world: you could pile life upon life for me and it would not be enough. i've also suffered in unusual ways, too--e.g. i've had cancer,and i've died and been coded so many times that at this point i live somewhere at the margin of this reality anyway. i've been to the other side, and back, and know what's waiting for me in a way i think few people get to experience. i don't care to share my reflections on the experience beyond that, but its all to say: amor fati. i wouldn't want to know when i'm going to die--i'm been flirting with that possibility for a while...
>>719011832 how old are you, our of curiosity? when do you expect that your novel will be done/ready for publication/published?
>>719012593 yeah i like video games. my main hobby is def reading but i like to intersperse with game breaks: i'm actually playing battlefield 1 (ps4) in between replying to posts right now. apart from that, i like starcraft 2, doom, GTA V, and skyrim. i absolutely hate the turn to cinematic gaming today, the push for touch-screen and mobile games, etc.
>>719005730 For a while now I've been fascinated with the overlooked class of officially "non-educated" people who do tons of their own reading and learning and end up being more knowledgeable and capable of independent thought than 90% of college grads. You seemed like one of these types.
Occasionally I'll find someone like that on Youtube making videos, and I always love seeing it. They're generating insightful content for free, while establishment news figures (whether at NPR or the BBC or Fox News) get paid to produce what is mostly groupthink.
>>719013021 27. it'll probably be ready in another couple years. i think i have the skeleton of it now but the writing technique kinda requires me to just check in with writing on it when i need to process my emotions and stuff. so i write a lot, just in small bursts when it comes to me usually. i could've worked on it in a more disciplined way, but it's not something i can bank a career on and this way suits me.
>>719011417 I'm a strong believer in "Ignorance is bliss," including it's moral and practical shortcomings. I like to think of life as one big surprise. Most people say they "get high" on life with optimism, I'm the opposite I like suffering per say; not the starving in the streets, dead parents, trapped in a basement stuff but I see the good inside the bad. Being under the storm clouds gives the most profound view of the distant sunshine, and that's how i'll approach death. What in this life could make you hesitant to walk towards the light at the end of the tunnel?
>>719013876 it's aight. multimedia basically means doing anything interactive and/or web-based. 360 degree video, etc. they wanna train me on VR gear, have me learn to code basic stuff for the internet so i can do interactive media stories. basically all the post-flash stuff that a lot of news sites do with infographics and all that. it's cool but it's not like i worship the technology.
what could keep me here? all of it, the whole goddamn thing. the jesuit principle "god in all things" might constitute a nice summation of my theology; even in death, i feel something smiling behind it--not laughing at me, mocking me, but a kinda slanted grin, half knowing and half loving. i was born, i feel, to bare witness, to exist as one of the silent curators of this world--it passes before me in all its incadescent wonder, and there isn't a thing about it--the love, the pain--that i don't love. odi et amo--and everything in between.
>>719014081 this is a tough subject for me and i have too much to say in a 4chan post to be honest. as far as the noble lie is concerned, i'm fundamentally in line with plato, machiavelli and arendt in a macro political sense--e.g. that the lie can have positive, stabilizing social value that naturalizes inequalities effectively, beyond obviously its categorical denounciation in christian apologetics or kantian ethics.
on a personal level, i think all men lie--but that some lies are more truthful than others. i pretty much stand with nietzsche at this juncture: i think its all false, its all a lie, but rather than landing in nihilism, this has bought me a (imagined, at least) freedom: i think the lie is really the gateway to power, and anyone who opens his mouth fundamentally does violence against an intransigent reality anyway, so instrumentalizing it--e.g. making it "noble," turning might into right--is really just a matter of turning power into--what?--something human
so yeah, i'm pretty much all for the noble lie, except for when it ends in something like berlin's notion of positive liberty, and "lies" become "The Lie," e.g. totalitarianism or fascism
that's my quick two cents on the topic. your opinion? where do you stand?
i grew up a ways outside of silicon valley and the tech boom is the reason places like oakland and san francisco where i used to have a lot of fun and could imagine myself living in are starting to become empty, unfun and unlivable except to the super-rich. so there's that. but technocrats have always disgusted me. there's something pretty horrible about the kind of arrogance. big data is the newest thing and when you see what kinds of things people pretend it can do it's just shocking. but historically when a big new innovation comes along people tend to go overboard with it and think it can do everything. happened with electricity, the internet, even marijuana prohibition being repealed has a lot of people claiming it can do miraculous things. honestly, that 'silicon valley' show mike judge did is far too nice to the technocrats and they're vile, but technology is pretty neutral like Chomsky says. you can use it for authoritarian or emancipatory means, creative or destructive means.
>>718999285 Hey man, I've been lurking in this thread for quite a while. I just wanted to say that I really admire how you genuinely seem interested in people's lives and interests. Do you have any advise for a shut-in like me to be able to form better bonds with people and converse properly?
>>719016415 journalistfag here sorry to butt in, but i got something you might not hear too often, or at least i didn't hear it until later in my life.
personally, i'm pretty shut in if i give myself the chance. it's just...easier. it's usually not as bad as it used to be since i've had to start networking and doing shit. the training i got where i had to start cold-calling people i never talked to before for interviews helped a lot. got comfortable talking to strangers. that's not the point though.
the advice i'd give is it's fine if you can't take being around people 100% of the time. people fucking ask me for shit a lot and even if it's just to chill and talk about nothing sometimes it's a chore and you're fine saying no to it. you're a lot better at it than you think, especially if you pay attention to your own basic emotional needs and are sorta honest with other people about them. not that you need to explain yourself to people when you gotta take a minute or take the occasional time off. but you know more than you think.
>>719016919 I used to have to do cold calls for sales, fuuuuuuuck that noise. I always heard about these people who are magical on the phone and make a majority of their sales over the phone, but i never met one of those people because they don't exist.
>>719017117 for sales that sounds like a drag. it's slightly more of a game in my field because you gotta get people to admit to stuff they might not want to say and you gotta both butter them up and confront them. it's fun sometimes
>>719016415 that's very kind of you, thanks. i'm not really sure what to say exactly: i suppose my interest in others lives/my questions emerge from a sorta selfish point, actually, in that i like to learn from the world, and talking to others saves me a lot of time. its less exploitative than that because i actually enjoy listening and helping as well, but for the most part i see each person as a new opportunity to gain power--not insofar as i instrumentalize people to ends they otherwise wouldn't pursue or aren't advantageous to them, but that i use them to access knowledge and forge attitudes otherwise opaque to me. i've found that this has created an incredible feedback loop in my life, and that life is, for the most part, the cultivation of these spirals, either upwards or downwards: for me, the more i converse, the more i learn; the more i learn, the more deeply i can converse, and i feel the whole trajectory of my intellectual and social being slowly unfold as time goes on, with my happiness--my apprehension and comprehension--inexorably linked to the entirety of the project and moving constantly toward higher peaks. what else is there to say, really?--i'm sure you're already an excellent human being--read more, exercise, love freely, fear not, live forever.
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