This person is her heritage, and her mark on the world. She lives on in this person. They should live on with her sacred memories, for it is what she would wish. They would be the proof that she existed and lived a good life to the end.
Perhaps even, one day, they can carry on her mark with children of their own, or some talent they could bring to the world/
>Be me >19 year old uni student >Be quiet person whom many know to be "weird" whatever that means >Consequently that means nobody cares to get to know me, I feel like I'm wearing an invisibility cloak >Be kind of a pothead in HS but not nearly at the level that most people at uni are >I go through a gram or two in a week if I smoke everyday >Most people go through a gram in one sitting of many in a day >Point is I smoke very infrequently, maybe once or twice a month if not less >Start to become known as the "chill designated driver dude" >"Chill" means that I allow them to hook their phones up to my car's Bluetooth and blast their nigger rap whilst I drive them about >Basically become an uber service for potheads >Start to think that they are taking advantage of me in the back of my mind and hate myself for it >Quickly met with the reality of the fact that this is my only meaningful human contact ans the only think people know and like me for >So I allow it to continue despite my better judgement >Start driving more and more people around and eventually monetize it >Don't make much money but its enough to pay for gas and tendies
Will tell more stories about specific individuals bump/reply for intrest
>>718866614 I didn't care at all until I saw the picture of a hawt af petite bae.
Anyway, honestly it doesn't really matter if you or anybody else dies. I just don't see the problem with existence. It's funny to imagine it being an actual abhorrence to anyone, just like when I watch those Mr. Meeseex going insane on Rick and Morty, but to me it's just neutral with some bad, good or great moments here and there.
Just get over yourself, there's nothing special about existing, and there's no need to end it either. We find meaning in the things we experience and/or like, find your own meaning.
Otherwise kill yourself, that's fine too I guess. Kinda sad it's not some ugly bitch killing herself instead though, but that's just my dick talking.
>This would pot uber thing started with my friend Elias who I met in high school >First time I ever smoked was with him in junior year >we both had good grades and got into the same uni >When he came to uni he had changed though >Started to smoke more and more amounts on a more frequent basis >Becomes addicted and relies upon me to drive him places to go about his day >One day I was driving him to work and he passed out in the back of my car >That's when I put my foot down, I asked him what he was doing with his life >He said he didn't know and felt bad that he had become what he had sworn not to: an addict >Gets fired from job by Mr.Sheckelstein for being late that day >Becomes more depressed >Later that year I found out that his father had abused him throughout high school >Also found out that his brother had been re-deployed in the marines >He attempted suicide >He's still in mental care and I never see him anymore >Docs put him on heavy anti-psychotics, so when I did see him he was more of a zombie than when he was stoned >Tfw best and only friend at uni is a literal zombie whom I never see anymore
>Brad was this new guy in uni >In one of the fraternities >Real frat boy-chad and a friend of Elias >Troublemaker as well, couple of things on his record >Got caught doing weed near a school and almost got arrested >Was a pretty stand up guy, nice to everyone, gave me free weed >Emphasis on was >Every time he would get in my car he would demand that I dive him to some fast food place >He would always be incoherent and retarded sounding when he ordered >Would always blast rap where every other word was "nigga" in my car with the base all the way up >made weird hand gestures whilst he did it like he was beat boxing or something >Other than that he was pretty loyal for a short time, me and him would go to parties >None of which interested me >My relationship with this kid soured when he started to get more and more desperate for weed and drugs in general >Got addicted to pills and almost OD'd a few times, requiring hospitalization >Then the broke into someone's house to steal weed and got busted by the cops >Got charged with breaking and entering >Arrested and currently serving in prison >No remorse or sympathy whatsoever.
>At this point I'm starting to wonder what's so bad about the world that everybody needs to smoke or do drugs to feel happy >Where have we gone wrong >Be up in the North Shore of Chicago visiting parents for Christmas >Meet up with former high school class mate Claire who was a stoner as well and went to a local college >She lived near my parent's house and would always ask me to drive her places >She would literally smoke every time we would stop and if we were not stopped would request to do so >Got annoying after a while >After a while her incessant nagging causes me to give in to temptation >I let her stop off, where does she go? >My childhood park >So many memories of that place, of laughing as a carefree child when we were all truly happy >Playing on the jungle gym was what got us high, we didn't need any chemical trickery of our brains to feel good >I learned to ride a bike there and even had my first kiss there when I was 16 >See it being desecrated by a bunch of stoners who don't know what this park means to other children and to me >Get pissed off and leave her there to walk home in the cold >0 fucks given, at this point I'm done with drug addicts >All I ever wanted was human connection which I never seemed to be able to get >Still don't know what happened to Claire and don't want to know.
>>718869874 I think people want a distraction. There's so much hate and animosity and tension in the world everyone tries to find an escape. Not all escapes are as destructive as drug addiction, but most people have them.
By being nice to these people, giving them rides and looking out for them, you're making there world a little less shitty. If you can't handle that anymore that's ok, you'll find a place keep looking
>Ben was one of my long standing co workers and one of my only friends after Elias turned into a zombie >He lived a few towns over so the only time I got to see him was when he came to work with me >He was an alright dude, generally decent in his character, didn't steal like some others did, was opposed to anything but weed >We decided to go to Chicago for some music festival for spring break >Brought a little bit of weed with me whereas he brought what I believe was upwards of an ounce >He was a big time stoner, would see him smoking weed out of a vape in the break room bathroom at work >Despite this was not that big of an addict unlike the others who smoked as frequently as he did >Was generally an okay dude and still continued to be >Then when we were smoking beside Lake Michigan on our way back to out hotel for the night I realized something >Ben and a few of his other friends would just pick any old spot to smoke in >No sense of aesthetics, only to smoke >Eventually find this little nook nestled in some deep foliage with a beautiful overlook of the lake from some elevated rocks >Was around sunset time so quite the sight to see >I finish one bowl when they're on like they're fifth >Want to stay to admire the beauty of the lake and the beauty of Nature >They want to go do some menial shit like find some food vendor on the beech not even 5 minuted after it hit them >Tfw nobody will see the would the way you will >Tfw lonely and isolated because of this
>>718870197 I'm slowly going into that situation. I smoke weed often but I still am out hiking as often as i can and working. But all of my friends now just want to sit inside and do nothing all day which is making me lonely because i dont want to even see my friends anymore.
>After spring break start to develop interest in girl in my class >This is not a love story so I'll spare you the details >Interest was shared and we entered a relationship a few weeks later >Was a loving relationship till about mid summer >We went on this camping trip looking up at the stars with each other in our arms >Sophia was this beautiful girl with golden hair and piercing crystal blue eyes >Alas after July ended those eyes were almost always red >She becomes more and more distant, she no longer holds me with that same feminine touch >Her soft soothing voice now coarse and raspy >She left me in September >Figure out it was because I was no longer getting medical
>Last greentext was short because of the pain it causes me to write it >Running out of time to cover leading up to the present >The last straw came when a few douche bag fraternity boys hotboxed my car and I got pulled over >They were vaping so it did not smell thank God >Never really got why people hotbox, its so stupid in my opinion >Cop lets us go >I drive up a few blocks and kick them out of my car and throw their stupid nigger rap playing phones out the window >Connect my phone and my true identity to my car, finally I'm myself again and not some slave to others' opinions >Funny how a simple lesson taught to you your entire life only really becomes applicable after you've seen what giving too much of a shit about what other people think can actually do >I spend my days alone now, and I'm happier because of it, I smoke weed occasionally and don't let it interfrew with my life >Have accumulated library of books and am becoming better person >Tfw this is the happiest I've ever been >Tfw all came from the hardest lesson I have learned thus far
>at work, had my hoodie hung up in the back room >shift done, grab hoodie from under everyone else's stuff, go put it on >notice something familiar >it's the same fabric softener she used to use >all the bad feels I thought I had gotten past come rushing back >still wearing it now fuck
>>718865505 >be 19 >perpetual fuck up >fuck around in school entire time >1.9 GPA >Uncle pressuring me into military >start losing weight >hit weight requirement last night Help I don't think I can make it /b/ros
>>718876746 thanks anon, I'll do what I can >>718876859 you got a second chance? is there a relationship here or was it a one time thing? either way, don't sweat it too much, people put way too much importance on losing your v-card, when you do it doesn't change a goddamn thing. >>718877215 nope, fuck you anon, you're gonna make it we all will
>>718877928 just talk to her about it, explain you were nervous and want to give it a shot for real, preferably in a situation where you can go for it shortly after the conversation from this moment on, stop watching porn and jerking off, as that's also a likely factor remember, one or two drinks can get you going and improve things, but more than that are generally detrimental so a little light drinking is something that could work for you
>>718878426 Porn and jacking off is definitely a factor here. I'll talk to her in the morning, she's staying at my place and I kinda just left the room shortly after that. I took a few shots of whisky earlier, and I've heard whisky dick is a thing.
If she doesn't give me a second chance then fuck it. Ill just watch brazzers for the rest of my days.
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