Ask a p-psychologist anything! But f-first, tea!
I'm h-here for you Anonymous; h-how can I help?
inb4 tits or gtfo
L-let's not be newfags Anonymous
After all, you know the rules and so do I
Wings for dayz, anon
Alice seriously when the fuck are you gonna get some food in your system?
Those look like 2 sticks covered in read panties.
L-look, you've all g-got a lot to say and we'll g-get to that.
But first, let's select a tea okay?
i fapped to you twice OP .
i want to put my meaty part in your silky hole and fill it with white cream of happiness
G-glad to hear!
It isn't s-silly!
Oh w-wow, you understand w-what I'm from! I'm impressed!
N-never asked for trust <4
I already inb4'd silly!
It w-was okay!
I'm s-sorry, I can't read panties.
I double majored!
And b-better than ever!
L-looks like t-this is todays tea!
L-let's talk about that!
F-first, I'm not anorexic. S-second, I'm not male.
It's l-like you didn't even read the first post.
I just want to say this is in response to you saying you're not attractive because of your scars! so i want to know more about what you think of yourself..i guess it was a few months ago...
I s-sent them all out yes <4
G-good for you!
I'm a b-burn victim!
I m-messaged like 200 people.
Hello. I'd like to think I'm a pretty normal person but on the other hand I can't seem to go a day with out masturbating. Is there something wrong with me?
S-so, let me t-talk to you about this tea for a b-bit, because it's super good <4
Masturbation is b-both healthy and encouraged!
It's n-not your fault <4
B-by going to a doctor!
Y-yes, every day at 8PM
Except when I'm late
W-welcome to 2017 <4
Absolutely n-not <4
Well miss Alice, thank you for this free therapy session. Why don't we chat over some coffee instead?
One t-that makes you make b-better choices <4
N-not a trap, friend <4
-carefully cleans all of the wood surfaces in the thread with the lemon pledge and admires how they shine. Is glad to keep the thread clean and hurries back to the broom closet to get the vacuum cleaner-
Alright, n-now that we all have t-tea and are all lamenting m-my lack of a penis, l-let me ask you seriously Anonymous.
How was your day? How are you doing? How can I help?
Socket frame disconnected from sockets/broken/partially attached so it springs back and forth
I zoomed in.
You'll notice it doesn't say "Ask a h-handyman".
I think what you really meant was "Fix your weird socket."
Psychologist, eh? Odd place to be putting your practice to. That's just me.
Is there anyone who fill your rotten pussy with cum?
W-what place needs it m-more?
L-lurk more, I've only b-been here six years now.
S-sorry, I deal with science, n-not fantasy <4
T-this is a t-thread for Anonymous to s-seek help; you m-may wish to ask a different question <4
Man up and get one, you bloody imbecile.
I figure anywhere, considering this place is already condemned to an eternity of self damnation.
My sleep schedule is completely demolished, I've been waking up later and later every day, tonight for example, I woke up at around 7 PM. I'm up all night, can't sleep, I'm depressed.. No GF FeelsBadMan, I rage at noobs on video games and feel like a fucking ass hole afterwards, no job, living with family. On top of that I've been hospitalized recently because I was shitting blood. (21 y/o). I smoke, and I've been to jail. I'm pretty much fucked if you ask me. My question to you is, should I rob a bank, or shouldn't I?
I work with disabled kids who cant talk or sign (pretty much just gesture in a general direction). had a child to day and he was trying to make himself clear that he wanted something but the communication barrier is difficult. any suggestions?
Can't wait for someone to recognize this faggot's kitchen and dox him
You are damn right Cofee is master race
S-same reason you d-didn't, I suppose <4
L-let me help~ Listen t-to this before you sleep!
Hmm. Okay day. Preparing for a work trip to the US at the start of February. We're not ready yet so it's a bit overwhelming. Suggestions to cope?
Apart from that I'm slowly getting over my breakup in goddamn October. She left me and now can't stop trying to contact me for us to get back together. I know it's a bad idea to go back, so I ignore her. But it is not working. Ideas?
I'm in the early phases of a joint artistic project with a special someone, but I think I replied too late to their last message and now they've forgotten about me. Any way to restart the discussion without sounding like a jerk?
Any tips for procrastination? I have some writing to do and can't bring myself to do it after long days of work. Tips?
As always, thanks a bunch Alice!
So why do you do this and how did you start?
I can't seem to get enough sleep nowadays. What do you recommend?
Hi Alice, long time no see. I've been sort of depressed lately, even though I've recently been promoted, and find some satisfaction in working full time.
It's like there's no meaning to life, like working is a distraction that is wasting my life. Even though I'm only twenty, I feel like time is moving faster and faster, and I'm, having a hard time keeping up. Is this normal, or am I just being a pussy?
[spoiler] Also I'm stuck in the third world of dark souls 3 how the fuck do I defeat that tree? [/spoiler]
Y-you against me, m-me against you,
Fuck y-you gonna do?
i remember you. you gave me some okay advice about my possible drug related brain damage. or somethign like that. I never went to a doctor. i'm still here, and i'm still alive.
aren't you going to say, that you're disapointed in me?
okay. heres one- why am i more attracted to damaged women, or women with lose moral values/low self respect, than I am some kidn of mentally healthy person?
I would like your doggo and your tea please. English and currently pet-less.
Hi Alice, how will you ignore me today?
Oh d-dear. L-let me think.
Perhaps h-having a picture book w-would help? W-with common items or actions he m-might wish to have or do? Then h-he could gesture to what he wants?
T-then why not put yourself b-back out there?
Plan it out. Like, this is an easy one: make a schedule, itemize all the things you need, go over and over it until you know it, understand it, memorize it.
Anxiety is happening because there are unknowns. Eliminate all the ones you can find, and you'll feel better <4
W-what an asshole!
I d-do it because if I d-don't, no one will.
T-try unisom! V-very effective!
I'll b-be fine!
Life has meaning when you make it have it, Anonymous. Life DOES move faster as you get older, or at least your perception of it does.
Think about it. Each day is LESS of your perceptive reality than the last; the second day you have is 1/2 of your life, the fourth is 1/4th, etc etc.
That's just an interesting part of how our brains work! Nothing to it but to accept it <4
>I didn't listen to any of your advice last time, please waste more of your time on me onee-chan
why the pictures , why not a buy a full anime masks ?
also did you draw them ?
Okay Dr. Alice, thank you by the way.
My day was a bit exhausting. My girlfriend has Asperger's and i am a fat white NEET without the benefit of upper-class liniage or a trust fund.
All she wants to do is play Pokemon GO and eat. Quite literally all of our time together for the last 6 months has been one or the other.
How do i convey to her that i love her, but the routine is bugging the fuck out of me?
Ive tried but by the time you get to the thing he wants hes become so frustrated that he cant focus on the images and just makes louder noises
*blinks* T-that wouldn't make literally any sense.
It's y-your life, Anonymous. F-feel free to ignore my advice; t-the only person you are hurting is y-yourself.
This place usually full of whiny rejects in life?
Alice... I know you, but you know me?
My gf and I got into a fight, not physical, and she stormed off. I fucked up but we fought like this before and we always made up. But this time she was pissed. I tried talking to her and she just flipped me off. How could I calm her down?
Hmm, faggot. Not like I haven't heard that insult slung around this website about an insurmountable amount of times before.
B-buy a hitachi wand.
T-that's neither how the flu n-nor how the vaccine works.
S-sounds like you need to change your perspective!
Sleep on it. It'll help your studying go to long term memory.
P-please, just Alice. I'm n-not a doctor.
I recommend getting a job.
Math is v-very useful! I'd try to l-learn programming on the side, it's b-basically math in motion!
Aw t-that's really sad to hear....if y-you don't have much time b-before he gets upset, you could do what Mc Donalds does!
Make a "menu" with a series of generic pictures, even vaguely related to an activity or item. Then when he picks one, distract him for a bit so his subjective mood catches up.
Then show him ANOTHER menu, this one MORE focused than the last one, BASED on what he picked previously. For example, if he picked food last time, this would be a menu of different KINDS of food.
It should take only three layers deep to get pretty close to what he wants, and as long as you keep his focus off choosing for a bit, it should improve the changes he successfully gets what he wants!
What do you want in exchange for sitting and having tea with me because your flavour collection is miles better than mine?
>inb4 "look at this nerd"
>*blinks* T-that wouldn't make literally any sense.
that makes no sense
Seriously, get professional help, offering unqualified advice to people might seem helpful but can cause more damage than helping. Where did you study?
So you telling me that you should vaccinate because there are ppl who could die by flu? If they die by flu they are anyway already near dead. And getting ill is good, it stimulates your immunity system.
A-anon but t-that's l-lewd! B-but I would p-probably enjoy that!
I got told that I run with the derelict crowds since middle school. I was also told that it was because I subconsciously need to be the ringleader of whatever group I'm in. The druggies/party/street racing crowd is fairly easy to control and be the smartest person in the room. but do you think this is valid?
My day was alright i guess. That's kinda the problem. I have a decent life, decent job, and I am no where as badly off as others have it. But the thing is I just can't seem to feel joy out of anything anymore. Work seems like a chore, everything I do seems like its way more work than it should be, and even when I do "fun" things I feel like I am only repeating a cycle because that's what I use to get joy from. Worst part is I feel like I have no choices anymore and I am only 25.
until we have a spanish flu outbreak again.
the one that killed young, healthy people.
do yourself a favor and do what your doctor recommends for a change. it might benefit you or someone you love.
j/k you don't love anyone.
and you wont ever listen to your doctor about your lack of diet and exercise.
yes I'm insulting you because there's nothing left but insults when you're this stupid.
it's far more enjoyable to troll and shitpost than to try and educate someone who won't listen. you should know this well
Isn't all of /b/?
I d-don't have a car at this time <4
G-glad to help <4
B-because you need t-to talk to a doctor <4
*blinks* I d-do these threads for free silly <4
It makes no sense to say that your diagnosis makes no sense?
Boy, I better go tell my colleagues this, they've been gettin' it all wrong for ages!
...I'm not near death, but I could easily die from the flu. Due to a weakened immune system.
You are kind of a selfish prick huh?
CS and Psychology <4
I was asking the good Doctor of this thread
Not a bitch. -sips tea-
Now now, a doctorate in cuteness is still a doctorate.
I am actually taking full time care of my mother who came down with a debillitating illness after i graduated secondary school.
Getting a paying job simply isn't an option until she dies or gets better (impossibly unlikely).
What are some good jobs for someone with crippling social anxiety? im smart as shit but can barely get through an interview..
thats actually quite a good idea, thanks <5
It w-works for me!
G-get a shovel!
That isn't even m-me, silly <4
Y-you have anhedonia. Seek m-medical attention.
P-program a game!
you are wrong, life move fast when you do the same thing, if you full your life new things you make life "appear" longer also this is the way to fulfill life.
now think of your last 6 years.
I don't know what to do with my life. I'm 19 and in a program through my school that gets me a job (near the school, it's cities away) and they pay for a few semesters of college, but I'm not motivated at all. I have no idea what to do. What can I do to find out? Or, tell me something to do with my life.
May be if I cook for Alice - dono she will notice me
Because vaccinating against normal strains will prevent an mutation of a deadly-strain. No its more like the other way round. The harder you make the selection for the virus, the deadlier he becomes. Its like murricans and antibiotics. You idiots develop antibiotic-immune bacteria strains by giving medical for every little shit and eben preventive
If I keep this up, is the little vein pulsing in your forehead going to erupt to paint the wall next to you? If so, I best not stop.
Am currently seeing a psych dr. and team of specialists. They have only formally-diagnosed me as having bi-polar and drug-induced psychosis (used to do a lot of MDMA), but I think I've fried my brain and developed schizo, autism, and a few more disorders. It some days feels excruciating to live with the constant paranoia, regret, and self-loathing. I rarely leave the house, spend all my time smoking weed and browsing 4chan. Getting bored of the routine, but I'm too pussy to venture back into a society that I worry will reject me
i met the love of my life a few months ago, but her mom hates me and i have no idea why. ive never even had a conversation before. one day everything is fine, the she slowly started pushing us apart. weve been dating in secrecy for about a month now. the girls name is mia, and shes the most wonderful person ive ever met. but she has lots of issues. she has depression, bipolar, and autism. despite the fact she gets sad alot, i love helping her feel better. she tells me all the time that she wouldnt have anyone else, and im the only person who listens to her, talks to her on a regular basis without avoiding her, and loves her as a person, not just trying to get into her pants. her mom is probably the worst mother a person with these issues can get. shes way too strict and freaks out and screams at her about everything. LITERALLY EVERYTHING! shes not allowed to lay down in her own home, her mom screams at her to "sit up like a normal fucking person!" shes so verbly abusive, and she actually hit her recently. shes a depressed, bipolar, autistic girl under 18 who gets abused by her mother. shes turning 18 next year and i promised to help her. the law says that any person in the USA over 18, despite disorders has the RIGHT to choose their living space. her mom says that shes not allowed to leave once shes 18 because she has special needs. so she clearly hasnt done research on this topic. i want to take her back to my place after shes 18, and my best friend who is an active duty US marine will help me explain to her mom that she cant do anything about this. and then possibly marry her. what do you think? im so worried about what will happen, and i dont know if this plan will work. please help me.
Y-yes, as someone w-who isn't utterly incapable of research, I do <4
Patient. Seek medical attention.
T-then you aren't a NEET, dear.
T-that's easy! I d-don't have it!
I'm also not a sexual psychologist, sorry.
S-sorry, neurology disagrees with you <4
...you have it backwards.
You GET motivation from DOING things. By making choices, by taking chances, by TRYING THINGS OUT!
If you have no idea what to do, then try a lot of things!
T-then give her space, silly.
Oh silly Anonymous; you could live a loving, happy, successful life all on your own.
You don't need me <4 I'm just here to show you what you are capable of.
I got some nyquil only take it when i really need to. Often sleep during the day since i stay up to 5:20am every day on the computer doing anime or playing 3ds. can't play during the day cause my dad is a get a job nazi and blows the fuck up if i look like i'm doing nothing.
Alice, I think I killed one of the people in here. I'm not apologizing.
Oh, there you are. You had me all worried.
S-sounds like you are l-literally making yourself w-worse by continuing to dose yourself w-with psychoactive drugs.
Maybe stop that.
....it actually d-doesn't say that, given that is a s-state level issue, n-not federal level.
But it sounds like you are underage b&, s-so kindly get off of /b/ <4
H-have you tried prostate stimulation?
*shrugs* T-they are free to seek someone else. No one h-has a gun to their head.
I am active all over /b/ <4
I would really like to get an outsiders point of view. I'm almost 23 , single. I would like to know what kind of mentality would cause an individual to avoid dating or intimate relationships. I have no problem talking to woman. I just don't see myself asking any of them out.
Weakened immune system... Well you can die from anything since there are millions of different virus strains. Getting immune against 10 000 of them decrease s your risk not very much. And honestly I don't give a fuck. If you have an weakened immune system then its your problem