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/b/ Pls. I need help from any of you guys who have gotten laid,

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 120
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/b/ Pls. I need help from any of you guys who have gotten laid, had relationships, or are good at getting girls. What's the best way to get girls? I've tried everything. Confidence, manliness, humor, the "bad boy" persona, taking up guitar, being a tough guy, everything. I need real advice for getting girls. Any help would be appreciated.
>>
>>717651724
Alcohol and money, lots of both.
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>>717651724
dont directly try. by that i mean focus on yourself, focus on your hobbies. thats what makes you different from other people. live an interesting life and the rest will come naturally.
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>>717651724
Try being yourself and not what you think they want
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Also, best advice I've ever heard; work out until someone wants to have sex with you
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>>717651724
Be born good looking
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Im making an app that tells you exactly everything you need to do and say to get girls, how much would you pay for it?
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>>717651724
well if you want a specific girl, that's a lot harder than throwing game at every girl you'd fuck and getting a small percentage of them
the biggest mistake dudes make is pursuing one girl too eagerly/too long. Make it known you're down to fuck and if she doesn't reciprocate, stop contacting her at all. Either she gets what she wants, and doesn't fuck you, or in girls massively fucked up brains, she "lost" that "game" and now she might come back and fuck you.
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>>717651724

confidence and be yourself, my first girlfriend i straight just asked out in college randomly. months after we broke up, i was friends with my current girlfriend for a few months. she wanted to stay at my cabin so we went for a weekend, asked if i wanted to share a bed and i said sure. woke up in the morning and kissed her, been together for years since

she flat out admitted that when we first first friends what did it was that i was nice, chill, smelled good, dressed well, and i wore shirts that accentuated my muscles. that and i was just myself, after my first girlfriend broke up with me i wasnt actively seeking out a relationship. it just happened

i actually first met her on a board on here and we met irl at a car show
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>>717652740
This is me, BTW. I'm OP
>>
>>717653113
cut that faggy hair

also answer this faggot
>>717652872
>>
>>717653113

no homo youre not bad looking, jeans with a black dress shirt and some good cologne would take you a ways in a bar
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>>717653113
Cut hair short, work out, get hobby/career. You'll be fine.
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>>717652515
Still working on that. I have been for almost 2 months, but I'm not seeing results. Genetics suck ass.
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>>717653239
BTW I'm also the head of a biker gang I started in my high school. I have a denim vest with a snake patch to go with it.
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>>717653280
Maybe not the hair, but I'll look around more for a job. I work out a couple or 3 times a week.
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>>717653239
I'll try that. Not old enough to go in a bar, but I'll find a social building.
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>>717653552

if youre legitly OP youre going to have a hard time getting a decent girl being in a biker gang, my cousin had it made with a really nice girlfriend that had wealthy parents, he got into drugs/gangs and dumped his ass. they just started talking again after got clean
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>>717653067
Hell yeah
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>>717652872
About a dollar
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>>717653665
your hair makes me cringe. it looks dyed and it looks like you probably dress in panties and go on dirtyroulette at night pretending to be a female . wait... thats how i spent my night. nvm, you do you bro
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>>717653841
Damn. My gang doesn't get into drugs. I rejected a girl because she brags about the drugs she did and also tried to kill herself by ODing on oxycontin. Straight up said, "Sorry. We don't take junkies." Felt good.
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>>717653665
Trust me man, the hair is not helping you at all. Don't just look for a job, aspire for something you actually want to do. Women find ambition and self accomplishment attractive. Also lift heavy and do cardio. If you see no results your workout is not intense enough.
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>>717654046
I only dye it here and there. It's normally brown, but I dye it black, to match my favorite color, clothing, and personality. I tried dying it back to brown last night, but nothing really happened.
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>>717651724
Ignore girls who are lifeless, shallow, bitches.
Ask girls to hang out directly, who are kind, respectful and fun. Start by just asking them to hang out depending on your age and situation. If you are in college go have coffee or study for a similar class. If you are in high school it's a little more challenging. You might have to get her to hang out with a group of her friends at first. Good Luck. Don't worry about it (thats where ignoring worthless girls comes in).
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>>717654277
just let it go natural from now on. straight men dont normally dye their hair. makes you seem like a tryhard in my humble opinion
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Themaxgamer1028 ring a bell to you Op?
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>>717654126
Your people are weak because you have not been made strong by substances. Meth and man don't both begin with m out of coincidence.
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>>717654363
I'll try that
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>>717654339
Okay. Thanks.
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"Just be yourself."
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>>717653113
>>717653665
you faggot, the hair is your only obstacle. if you keep the hair, there is litorally nothing you can do to fix your situation
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>>717651724
Who else is tired of these worn-out threads, with some cuck as the OP, asking for advice on how to get women?
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>>717654367
No. I'll look him up quick.
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>>717654653
Bitch, did I ask you
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>>717654672
Don't worry about it, you look a bit like him, guy from Playstation I used to know
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>>717651724
drop your preconceptions and learn how to be fun and make people feel good when theyre around you. find people you actually want to be around because you like who they are instead of liking how hot they are.

if you suck at bagging women you have to start out with women that you already have stuff in common with personality-wise. then once you become more sociable you can evolve and expand.
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>>717654796
I see. Not a problem.
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>>717654728
Cuck, nobody cares about your success or failure with girls, fuck off.
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>>717653113
CUT YOUR HAIR YOU FUCKING FAG ARE YOU TRYING TO GET GIRLS OR SUCK DICK?
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>>717654840
Okay
>>
>>717654971
I didn't ask you, fag
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>>717654974
I'll look into it
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>>717654653
theyre nice they make me feel good about myself

>>717653113
if your hair is part of your personality just keep it and wear cool clothes. but dont expect sorority girls to go for you. look for hippies and hipsters.
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>>717655113
I hate both those people, but the girls can be hot. So I'll try that.
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>>717655045
Cocksucker, hang your fucking self. Or better yet cut off your crusty little dick and plunge it up your ass through your colon. I'm tired of these lame ass, low I.Q threads, fuck you!
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>>717653113
you have the face of "disgrace is in your future with me"
lmao

now think about this, imagine you're a girl and then some motherfucker shows up sayin "heeei gul, lemme smell yo forearms bitch" and that dude face is like your picture, holy shitttt nigger

hahahah

dude seriously cut your hair and grow a beard
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>>717651724
> Lift weights for like 6-7 months
> Don't be fat after that period
> Go out to bars, do stuff, make friends
> Be a normal human being
> Get laid

shit's easy anon, just don't be fat and be personable and some female will want to fuck you. If you get big enough hotties will want to fuck you as well.

Just try to be as normal possible, work on your career, work on your body, and work on your personality and the girls will come.

No one wants a fat ugly guitar playing bad boy.
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>>717655374
Neckbeard, I didn't ask you. Go back to your single mom's basement. Fat motherfucker.
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>>717651724
Know yourself. Be yourself.

I know it's cliche but its the only thing that matters.

That pickup artist stuff is a bunch of bullshit
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>>717655505
Nigga, I'm trying. Why do you think I lift?
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>>717653113
Haircut, exercise, dress well
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>>717655790
Thanks. But true, pickup artists are trash.
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>>717655814
I also lift

OK, let's see. Tell me what you do when you get to the gym. Cut the crap, be honest, don't bullshit me. 2 months are enough for results.

Tell me.
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>>717655635
Okay
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>>717655655
Fuck off with the mother shit, cocksucker. Your mother probably sucks enormous black dicks to the root, and is fat swine like her miserable off spring. Suck my cock, stupid bastard!
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>>717655989
Up to 100 bench presses, back workouts, treadmill, and this machine that you puch weights with your legs.
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>>717653307
Diet is more important than working out. And if you aren't eating enough protein and getting sleep you won't see jack shit for gains.

Don't underestimate sleep. Getting enough sleep is key to building muscle. Lack of sleep releases stress hormones. Stress hormones make your body think that you are in a survival mode and that you need to build fat because tough times are ahead.

Working out doesn't build muscle. Working out stimulates the release of hormones that instruct your body to build muscle. Stress hormones counteract and cancel out those growth hormones.
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>>717656110
You wanna tussle, fuckface
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>>717656204
Good advice
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where the fuck you guys go to get girls if you don't drink / like bars?
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>>717656160
100 bench presses? how much weight?
What back workout?
When do you treadmill?
Usually when someone explains their workout, they express it like this:
>number of sets X number of reps of this exercise with this much weight
> for example: 4x12 deadlifts 135lb
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>>717656232
Shove a tree branch in you rectum 12 inches, you miserable, worthless, piece of dog shit. Fuck your mothers syphilitic cunt, cocksucker!
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>>717656160
You need to do more research. It's good you have the motivation to work out, but you clearly don't really know what you are doing.

The science of getting fit is pretty simple, look at all the braindead morons who can get ripped. But if you aren't working out properly and eating right and sleeping then you are just wasting your time.
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seek retribution OP, its the final solution
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>>717653113
Haircut, dress well
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>>717656610
Dude, quit being a troll and worry about passing middle school.
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You see, anon, none of the above helps if you don't leave your house
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>>717653113
The only way you can pull off that haircut is if you are in a metal band. If not then cut your hair.
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>>717651724

Stop masturbating. I'm serious.
>>
Lift. Do fun things that you enjoy. Find out what kind of guy you are and what you want out of life. Go from there, because it kind of just happens when you do those things.
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>>717657084
Middle school?
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>>717656545
I don't put weights on them. Lifting the bar on its own is difficult for me. There's a machine that you sit in and pull weight down with your arms, and it's good for your back and biceps.
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>>717657117
I leave my house a lot, actually. I just can't go to parties and other gatherings.
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>>717657301
K
>>
Humans are pretty good at picking up on falsehood, even if they don't know it most people will be uncomfortable with you if you're putting on an act for them. The best advice I can think of is don't think about it, put yourself in the position to be in conversations and let it naturally flow.
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>>717656822
Bruh. I won't kill abyone. I don't mind beating the everloving shit out of the people that made my life hell with a pipe, however.
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>>717657599
Shit. I've been using manipulation on many people, and they never seemed ti notice it. But okay.
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>>717657294
Seriously. Dude is right.
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>>717657437
Two steps outside your front door doesn't count.
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/b/ yourself fag
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>>717653113
So, you tried "manliness" with that hair? Cut that shit... or you can try with weird chicks, go to a comiccon, I know some weird chubby girls that look just like you.
No, seriously, cut it
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>>717657336
Alright. Want visible results fast? Try the 5x5. That's all you need. Google that, first result. Boom! Do that. Stop using machines, you're wasting your time. Do the 5x5, eat meat, eat vegetables, drink only water, don't eat junk, sleep 8 hours and if you can, buy whey protein. That's all you need to get fit. Seriously. It's that simple.

Don't socialize with anyone at the gym. Don't take any advice from anyone at the gym. And be polite.

Don't forget to grow a beard and cut your hair. That's it in terms of physical appearance. A fit body looks good with any clothes, but clothes your size with you as a well groomed man will take you places.

As for your personality, having discipline with your workouts will make you a better person. Reading will allow you to enrich a conversation. Listening to people and making them feel comfortable around you is more than enough. Just don't try to be fake, everyone will notice it and you will fail.
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>>717653113
fix up hair and visit /fa/ more often
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>>717651724

Consider asking people who are less autismal?
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>>717651724
Just stop being anything that doesn't make yourself comfortable in your own skin. Dig in to your hobbies, take care of your appearance (join a gym and eat less if you're fat), and bond with someone over a shared interest or sense of humor. Trying to bond as someone you aren't will only rip you up in the long run.
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>>717658955
I'm not fat. Bu good advice.
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>>717658567
Okay
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>>717658560
Bikers are manly as fuck, and they need the hair to match it. Plus, I'm a rocker.
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>>717651724
learn to give her the back hand compliment
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>>717652396
>>717654840
>>717655790
>>717656204
Pretty much these things OP. If you go at it with the intent of "getting girls" you'll just have a bad time and seem fake. Don't think about it, instead think about the things to you enjoy doing or want to do. Join a club or pick up a hobbie, Hang out with people that share similar interests. Focus on improving yourself and your life as an individual. Once you do you will develop a natural comfort/confidence level because your doing things for yourself (not to attract the attention of women). Don't force it, don't rush it..
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>>717659863
Do you have a $20,000 Harley? No? Then you aren't a hardcore biker and can't pull off that hair.
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>>717653113
get a haircut phaggot
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>>717651724

I will be your first response that is from a person who actually gets girls. You don't "get girls," if girls don't like you now, they never will. Go "all in" on one girl and make sure you have a steady job, and that will get you a girl. don't attempt to have sex with her, if sex happens it happens, it probably wont happen for you.
>>
Stronglifts 5x5. Punch a heavy bag.

The key to getting women is confidence, and the foundation of any man's confidence is not just your level of physical fitness, but your ability to hold shit down and stick up for yourself. I'm a musician and I spend a lot of time out in bars and clubs, and around women.
I'm not a big guy, 5'7 and when I started lifting I was 150 lbs. I did Stronglifts 5x5 three days a week, hit the heavy bag in just wraps, and ate like a fucking horse for 8 months. Find a buddy, spar and do pad drills occasionally.

Putting yourself through real, heavy physical strain like that changes you. It doesn't just make you more muscular. My posture is better. My joints are stronger. My skull and bones are thicker and more dense. My hands are strong; my knuckles are calcified and rock hard.

Now at 175, I'm still not the biggest guy in any room, but that shit doesn't matter. Within reason, regardless of their physical size if someone tries to fuck with me, I at least have something to say about it and I'm not compelled to back down and be made to look like a chump. May sound crazy, but that little amount of time on this program has made me so god damn strong and explosive, no one is going to pick me in a fight without paying for it. If I catch pretty much anybody square with a cross or hook, they are taking a fuckin nap, no doubt about it.

Women pick up on the kind of confidence that comes with that. Confidence is owning a room. Not being a dick just because you can, but knowing that nobody in any given room can decide they dont like you and try to make you look like a chump without paying for it. My 2c, for whatever it's worth to you.
>>
blamp
>>
>>717653113

start with a different haircut holy fuck
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>>717653113
cut your hair like an aryans. after that just don't be an autist or an asshole.
>>
Stop trying so hard to get a woman cuz if You are trying so hard you will turn up in weamen mind that you are desperet beta cunt so stop trying and chill bro
>>
>>717660767

sl5x5 is fucking serious. it gets miserable once the weights get up there. but the result are dramatic.
>>
>>717659863
Alright there, Billy Ray Cyrus. Cut the bullshit and get a sick ass fade. Also if you own a gixxer with a stretch, give up looking for pussy and come out of the closet.
>>
real advice to picking up girls.... talk to them... they are people too... can't find something to talk about? compliment their style or the atmosphere around you. Make Happy.
>>
I'll tell you the real secret. Don't watch porn or fap. Conserve your literal essence and you will have a natural animal magnetism . the word for it is charisma . it will give you real confidence Instead of pretending. This is the secret the Jews don't want you to know. Tapping and watching porn damages the psyche and makes it impossible to connect with women the right way. It also makes men docile and weak instead of dominant and assertive. Its why Jews create porn to make the goyim Easier to control. This is the reason you're all awkward virgins.
>>
>>717651724
Before you act the part, you have to look it. Take care of yourself, buy nice clothes, get in shape.
>>
>that feel when this new years i was given an opportunity of a lifetime
>was drunk and passed out
>woke up to people still chatting at about 5 AM
>chick is talking
>sounds real thirsty for cock
>still a bit drunk, so im able to converse without cringe
>wants to fuck, i want to fuck too
>she wants to go to an old unused laundromat
>we start walking
>we start talking
>next thing i know
>still talking
>haven't made my move
>still talking
>7:30 AM hits
>still talking
>its interesting at least
>about 8:45 rolls around
>"so are you still down to fuck?"
>she keeps talking
>im a virgin loser who never gets the chance to actually converse with girls
>indulge in more conversation
>we leave and watch an episode of Scrubs
>awkwardly sitting next to eachother in silence
>STILL HAVEN'T MADE MY MOVE
>9:30 hits, someone in the house is awake now
>just tell her im tired
>make my bed on my couch while she was still there
>she walked home alone
>keep beating myself up over this whole fucking scenario
>she didn't want to come over the next day because she was embarassed
>forever a virgin.
>>
>>717653113
i swear to god if you don't get a haircut after this many replies
>>
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>>717651724
>What's the best way to get girls?
>I've tried everything.
>Confidence, manliness, humor, the "bad boy" persona, being a tough guy

ok dude just stop trying so hard. guys like you usually are the last people to end up with someone.

i get hit on lots of times but i just ignore that because i'm simply not interested. also i'm not a desperate fuck, that helps because people notice and don't like you. i got a girl that i fuck and she's into heavy sm so i'm fine but the others just like me and want me around. i'm even balding and just look a bit better than average but i guess i'm charming and funny but i don't try to make people laugh, i just entertain myself and my friends when we're out. i'm pretty sure people notice that and like that i don't sell my true self out just to impress people. if you're true to yourself and don't force shit everythings good but you wont do that. you think you can learn how to pick up girls but i'm pretty sure you got other issues in life.
personally i think it's retarded to fuck millions of whores, i want the special ones and don't want to whore myself out.

oh god, i guess that cliche-tip being yourself worked for me. just realized that.
>>
>>717653307
>Genetics suck ass.
turns out that working out plus good diet works for everybody. please don't make me cringe.
>>
>>717661103
>aryan
With dark hair?
>>
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>>717651724
WHY ARE YOU FAGGOTS TRYING SO HARD
JUST CHILL THE FUCK OUT AND IT COMES NATURALLY GOD DAMMIT YOU AUTISTIC INSECURE PIECES OF SHIT
>>
>>717651724
HAHHAHA taking up guitar to be a bad guy? What the fuck no wonder it didn't work just flatter and bullshit your way say things that are attractive woman are dumb
>>
>>717651724
Stop being a fag and just be straight up with women. They adore confidence
>>
>>717651724
Be attractive. Don't be unattractive.
>>
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>>717653113
New clothes and styled hair. Educate yourself too.
>>
>>717653113

lol
>>
>>717651724
>any guys that have gotten laid
Nigga you on the wrong site
>>
>>717651724
Are you transitioning?
>>
>>717651724
never understood why guys want to get with girls so bad in the first place. sex is boring, girls are cunts, go out and focus on having fun instead of hooking up. if you try to make yourself a more sociable and fun person girls should come naturally and even if they dont you shouldnt care.
>>
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>>717662270
Get a load of this guy
>>
Lucky for you I actually have a heart for this kind of thing, so my 4chan answer is don't be a cuck, but my real answer is that if you really want a relationship, then I know it's cleché as fuck, but it's all about putting yourself out there and meeting the right person for you. It's not about putting on faces or personas, or being flashy and fake. Just be real. It fucking sucks being alone, trust me, I know. But every second you feel alone just adds up into making it all the sweeter when you find someone. The best advice I can give is to find what it is about yourself that you want to advertise to others, then put yourself in situations you can meet new people, and eventually someone will respond. Keep your chin up mate, there's new opertunities around every corner.

That or hookers. You could always hire hookers.
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