what is the dumbest thing you've done while horny

Fucked my friends wife in a hot tub, in front of 2 mutual friends.

>>717274000
Checked
I fucked your fat momma

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>>717274000
witnessed.

fapped in my niece's bed and left cum on her sheets.

>>717274171
How did this end?

>>717274000
almost convinced my cousin to sleep with me then took off my pants b4 she fell asleep and shit turned awk realquick

>>717274000
Came inside a girl I didn't know.

Twice.

got my gf pregnant

>>717274000
give'r the old lickaroo

>>717274000
I jizzed in my power outlet pretending it was a pussy. the power went out for a week and I didnt have the stomach to tell the repairman what I did.

>>717274000
taken a massive dump in the shower then used all the hot water to clean it up

>>717274000
Had sex wit a dude. It wasnt gay though

Had sex with gf at the time. Her grandparents were confused thinking there were rats in the wall.

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Gave a street hooker a hundred dollar bill because I trusted she would run in the store and bring me the change to pay her. She fucking ran all right.

came

>>717274683
Well, he got pissed, but was too much of a pussy to do anything about it. Everyone would giggle behind his back for being a cuck, and he ended up losing his friend circle, whereas I thought I'd be on the outs.

He moved 2 states away about a year later, and fathered a daughter. He actually died in his sleep a couple years after. I kind of feel bad, because I was kind of a turning point ruining the last couple years of his life. He was a great friend before, and we were pretty close

I heard through the grape vine that his wife was miserable in their new home, and she was home within a month of his death. I had already moved away, and I'm glad because I don't really want to deal with her and the guilt.

Used to spooge in the applesauce my grandma used to take her pills on the reg. Watched her eat it the next morning while she made me breakfast.

Actually thought about propositioning her to some fuck on more than one occasion but never went through with it.

>>717274000

a 9 year old boy.

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>>717274683
>How did this end?
Honestly I'm more interested as to who OP's picture ended.
>>717274000

>>717274000
Your mom :)

>>717275234
I'm sure it was not

>>717275609
did you find that bitch and sexually torture her in your dungeon for multiple days when you found her?

Let some guy I was friends with finger me while his friend face fucked me. Good times bruh

I was curious about anal simulation, but didn't want to finger or toy my asshole. I unscrewed the detachable shower head from the pipe/hose, and ran water up my ass.

It was a weird feeling. I came fast, and the cum kinda poured out rather than shooting. Then I was on the toilet forever shitting nasty water. All night I kept getting up and more kept coming out. At first I tried to just get it out in the shower, but the smell of shitty, chunky water was brutal. Plus the tub drained slowly, so I was basically standing in diarrhea. Even the next day I had to run to the bathroom at work constantly. I sneezed and a little got in my boxers

paid for porn

>>717276443
lying bastard. at least u got a clean enema if it was real and i wouldnt mind a clean enema atm

>>717276461
I swear porn sites exist for that one moment of weakness

>>717276555
Why on earth would I lie about that?

>>717275085
lolwut

>>717276596
Got my dollars worth though. Any video I was interested in, I ripped it from the site and saved. I've got several google drives full of porn vids stocked up

>>717275744
How do you feel being a big fat shitty backstabber scumbag?

>>717275085
hahahahahahahah

>>717276294
Just finger? Why not go full homo and let him fuck you?

>>717274000
fucked anything that walked

>>717276659
because thats fucken stupid and risky af to do to your shit sack

>>717274000
Got a girlfriend.

>>717274000

Asked a girl out

>>717276893
why dont you share my dear faggot friend? New year is here and the holiday spirit is to be shared.

>>717275085
The fuck

Molested little sister. That was like 15 years ago though. But now she's gone all Stockholm Syndrome on me. Which sounds like plenty of anons' dreams, given the amount of incest threads that get posted here. Problem is I'm not the least bit attracted to her physically. In either the face or the body. Come to think of it I'm not really attracted to her personality very much either. So yeah, family reunions are pretty fuckin awkward, especially if I have a girlfriend at the time.

>>717277083
What was the thread we're in again? I'm admitting it was stupid. I was a horny teenager and didn't know that you can actually die from this

>>717274000
Was late in the evening and dark
Saw a 16yo jogger pass by me
I ran past her then waited till she caught up with me
Tried to grab her tit thru her shirt and run away (was a 14 yo virgin then) but she blocked my hand and started screaming
I got scared and started running
She started chasing me
I'm a heavy smoker at that point so she was catching up to me
Had nowhere to run, but somehow outran her
She realized I ran away, I heard her start screaming worse, like a maniac
Lived in a small town then, kept thinking for months she may recognize me on the street one day, but that never happened
Lived happily ever after

>>717276972
def a grill and I'm not sure

>>717277378
Damn, that sounds horrible.

>>717276123
Gigabite < Niggabite

>>717274000
Fucked a 250 pound ham beast on a dare in front of a lot of ex neighbors.
Extra points, small town.

Played with my ass, caused some bleeding and had to go to the hospital. Now everyone knows i'm a faggot

I yelled Cookie Crisp like that wolf in the commercial does when I was coming. Giggling while in afterglow is best sensation.

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>>717274000
fell down the stairs after flirting with a girl I've crushed on for 5 years. that was about 30 minutes ago, just got home....

>>717274000
Blew myself quite a few times until I could almost get it all in my mouth, never came tho.

No homo.

>>717274000
Molested a girl that was passed out at a party. Came on her face and hair.

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>>717277711
underrated. also nice dubs and trips

Taking a shit right now

I made my 6yo brother give me a bj

>>717274000
fucked a fat indigenous woman.
I was so horny I just removed my pants and nothing else.
After that I took her home and never talked to her again.
At least I wore a condom

>>717275234
did you remember to say no homo

>>717275744
You should raise his children you dickhead

Had a one night stand with a chubby pool hall slag I barely knew. Paid for the hotel room and beer too like an idiot. Wasn't horribly attracted to her so it took me a while to get it up.

We tried for almost an hour with copious amounts of dick sucking and me eating her out until I maintained a boner long enough. Was only semi hard even then.

Had uneventful sex and busted on her stomach. She didn't seem that into it either. Tried to initiate AM sex the next morning but she wasn't having it. I didn't really want to either but she was there and we were naked.

Dropped her off at her car without even a kiss goodbye and haven't talked to her.

>>717277480
Sounds terrifying. What a cunt.
>>717278263
Sorry about that anon. I bet that's embarrassing.
If she's worth a damn she'll be cool about it.

>>717275084
Underrated

>>717278705
My fantasy.
I molest my cousins every chance I get while they sleep. Or accidentally rub my hard cock against them. We used to play kids when we were younger and that got my tiny dick so hard. I want to fuck them badly.


I gave myself an enema, felt amazing. But I ended up pumping air up there as well. I had terrible chest pains and aches that were crippling. I didn't want to say anything because it was embarrassing but it went away after a week or so. It hurt 8/10

>>717274000
That time i jerked off on your mom and some trickled in and she got pregnant, son

>>717274000
fucked a fatty (approx 400 lbs)

>>717280624
Why would that hurt so much for such a long time? Unless it was a massive amount of air. But still, I'd think that wouldn't take a week to fix, what would be stopping you from just expelling it like a fart?

Several hefty women

>>717280770
Trust me anon I tried. It was in my upper chest and wouldn't come out in burp or fart form. Eventually I let out a burp that was fairly big and everything went back to normal. The burp tasted like chili I ate earlier that week.

>>717279538
Or Fuck the daughter

>>717275744
You fucking asshole

>>717274000
A black street walker who turned out to be tranny, but he/she was halfway through giving me awesome blowjob so I let her finish. Not gay.

Took a shit in your moms vag and nine months later op was born

>>717274171
past thanksgiving
slept with friend's sister at our friends theater room
he walked in on us
no condom
still worried that she might be pregnant

>>717281213
Op must be nigger cos the only thing your shit would be covered in is nigger cum

>riding dirtbike in shorts
>round corner on trail and buddy is stopping right in front of me
>slam on brakes, foot slips off rear brake
>slip off back of seat, pull throttle, tire spins up the inside of my right leg
>from just above the ankle to just below my nuts
>have serious brush burn (HUGE blister with gravel embedded in it)
>Ride for another hour, till heat from exhaust on brush burn is too painfu
>go home, brother not there, but brother's GF's cousin is (man the harpoons
>ask for help, has to take shorts off to treat wound
>scream as she tries to dab out the rocks and applies peroxide
>Get erection, she takes off pants and starts to ride me, say no she just keeps on going

Drunk high n horny at 3 AM when i was 16. Posted an ad for a dude on craigslist. He drove to a street near me, i got in his car, i sucked his cock, he busted on my face. Went home, jerked off, and woke up for school the next day

>>717276893
Fuck that, I just look for a torrent.

>>717280942
That's just strange. Unless you have some weird sort of alien physiology that shouldn't even be possible. The sphincter separating your stomach from your intestines shouldn't let it travel in the opposite direction.

You should really think about donating your body to science when you die.

>>717274000

came in a girl not on the pill, 3x (2 at night, 1 in the morning)... she told me after the 3rd time she wasn't on the pill

> she was 19, i was 28
> i was a bit tipsy
> she sucked a mean cock
> i was a groomsman at a wedding, was the bride's sister (my friend, obvs, was the groom)

got up hungover as fuck, got to a pharmacy when they opened, morning after pill (so far... only time i've had to go get with a girl)

>>717281346
hawt

>>717281728
I think I'll pass.
I want to get cremated and put into a vinyl record. Or launched into space.

>Walking home megadrunk (tm)
>Cute black girl "need a ride?"
>Get to talking, she's cute, petite, and down for fuck.exe
>Back at her place, she sucks me so good
>Get nekkid, she is a guy in transformation
>Proceed to bareback said tranny until sunup
>Sober.jpg, jet outta there back to the pad
>Big headache, number in pocket
>Never called back

>>717280624
I'd molest her again given the chance. Also used to rub my cock against my cousins ass when we were kids, she turned out hot, occasionally take creepshots of her to beat off to.

>>717282035
You mean 'Jet Black'

>>717281728
>shouldn't
key word right there... shouldn't

Ever so slightly molested my young cousin

>>717281429
Fag

>>717282293
Well that sort of shit can be life threatening so I'd highly recommend he sees a doctor for it. Just sayin.

>>717276926
How do you feel being a small skinny subpar cumdumpster cuck?

>>717281737
didn't have sex but was fucking trying to

TLDR: could've had sex with one girl, that everyone has had sex with... but tried to fuck the unfuckable

>>717276443
If you habitually do this it'll get to the point where you'll be able to shoot water in your butt without retention and just enjoy the feeling. Can't help the poo water in the shower though. Source: been doing this for years now. Also would recommend actual butt play post enema