>>696474857 I went into treatment for snorting pills/dope. Clean for like 4 months, used once about 5 weeks ago -- Took responsibility for it. Would have relapsed tonight but dope boy missed my text... Saw it as divine intervention, if you will. Can't stop craving.
NA fag here. 5 years sober. Quit doing smack 10 years ago, but started drinking again after a while. Turned into an alcohol :( Doing pretty good now. 5 years feels like forever, but also not that long. Hard to describe.
Whenever I think back to being strung out, it was just so fucking horrible. And any time I see "drunk man kills 3" I just thank god I was so fucking lucky. Like some off duty cop in NYC just killed some people. Fuck that could have been me.
>>696475696 Go to a meeting bro. Call someone tell them how your feeling or shit do what your doing now. Fuck that shit. I used to do smack every day for years thinkinng about it makes me sick. gotta get to that point tho. Even now i still have moments where it crosses my mind but thats what being honest and having a sponsor is for..
i never believed the NA shit but now im pumped about it and generally have a good time with it.
>>696475918 I do AA/NA but I'm in an organized IOP program on suboxone -- so i shouldn't have cravings at all. It's not even about getting high... I can't explain it, exactly. Self-sabotage, I guess. Things are good being clean, but shit really hasn't gotten better. I'm not like 'dry drunk' or anything, but like, I just pictured myself in a better place if I was sober and I don't feel it.
I've talked to people.. Honestly, tonight was a win. I felt great for a while knowing that I walked away. I could have picked up elsewhere, I could have called my dude instead of texting him -- It would have been easy but I resisted it. I'm just like stuck in that train of thought.
>>696477072 I'm actually kind of pissed I let them put me on subs. I just wanted any treatment I could get but now I feel almost as trapped on subs as I was on dope. Only now I don't pay for it. I see the doc on Thurs, I'm telling her I want off the shit.
>>696477406 i got put on vivitrol. No feelings of being high and deep down i know it will suck if it try to use. Plus u can jump off and on it. So say you get off of it. Say some tragic shit happens and your getting worried your gonna use u can take it and your good for a month. Just kinda a helper. I dig it.
On a vacation in Ocean City, Maryland with my girl. Didn't take weed or cigarettes with me. Weed really isn't addictive, it's more of a personal want to smoke, but FUCK ME I want tobacco. I'm a gross motherfucker that rips up cigs and puts the tobacco on top of bowls in my bong, and on top of that I smoke cigarettes themselves. Nothing can compare to the rush of tobacco. I have vodka but drinking isn't nearly as fun. Still have about 2 weeks of vacation to go. On day 5 without any smoke. Kill me
I dont drink. Smoked weed maybe 5 times in my mid teenage years. But, other than that don't do shit. I have gone through multiple psychiatric medicine withdrawals, 2 cold turkey, so maybe I can relate a bit.
Drinking is fun for a while, but eventually drinking for alcoholics or people who cannot control their intake affect their life choices. It's easy to say fuck everyone, "im right" but it takes a man to say look I have a fucking problem and I need to counter this. I don't need a fucking substance to make me feel okay at night, I don't need a substance to talk to girls anymore. I NEED ME. MYSELF. The one who was born within me.
>>696480454 I have smoked everyday for the past 5 years and just a few days ago I realized how much of a problem I have. I've spent more that 10 grand on weed, bowls, and shit like that I've turned down jobs that pay double what I do cause I can't smoke. I litterly cried last night because I hate myself for wasting so much money on it. The mental withdrawal sucks so bad I wanna kill myself just so I stop craving smoking a bowl. I litterly have to drop all my friends because they all smoke and being around or even talking about it make the temptation to smoke to much not to. Weed made me waste 5 years of my life I'll never get back. If you only take one thing from this it's moderation spend more days a week sober than not it will help you in the long run.
Drank like I had to because I felt like I did for 7 years or so. Swollen liver, fucked up my galblader or so says the yellow creeping back away from my sclera. My Doctor says they can't see it, but I have high bilirubin. Oct of 2014 was my last drink. And June 14th 2015 was the 3rd birthday of my family's bar. It was also the two week birthday of the new bank account I had to open when my mother staged a coup with the landlord to convince him I was the reason we were $20k in the hole to him for rent.
We just passed the 4 year mark, and tonight actually I checked the mail and found our renewed license that I was able to pay for after hauling the business out of ~$50k debt. I've gotten 2 raises and the worst mistakes I have to worry about now are hiring shitty staff that chase customers away until I fire them and pick up a bunch of shifts.
I bartend and own a bar for a living and I don't touch the stuff after a crippling physical dependency.
Make yourself afraid of nothing but yourself when you don't respect your challenges.
>>696483509 Thank you for being so honest bro, and honestly go easy on yourself, the fact that you have acknowledged it is much farther than some people dare to go. People become addicted to things for comfort and pleasure, so the more you do something the less comfortable you feel when you don't do it. And vice versa, to break a habit- so stay strong and also chillax, find the right balance :)
>>696484111 This shit right here is powerful, I'm glad I read that, and I'm pissed the media will never pick up your story. I;m pissed at myself I have to come to 4chan to get stories like this, even if they are fake.
>>696483509 >>696484527 I've quit smoking weed a few times now after smoking 20 cones a day for more than 10 years straight. It's rough. I had a few beers and codeine pain killers each day to ease the yearning. But once you get through it it's like a natural high all the time, for me anyway. Wish I could have one every now and then but I don't want to go through the rough patches again.
I currently have to take a low dose of benzos for anxiety, and man I can feel it if I miss a dose. I don't know how people who abuse them do it. Honestly kinda pisses me off too, knowing that a lot of people really on them for anxiety while others get a fake diagnosis to abuse the shit out of them
>>696484111 I am currently entering college for the second time and I guarantee alchohol will be introduced once again. What are some ways to continue on my life course with out circumstances from outside interfering while still remaining fun or open to fucking women?
>>696485845 Funny meme, however not everything in life is a meme. You seem to come on here to berate and make fun of people rather than dealing what is in front of you. How's that mom of yours? How are you siblings? When's the last time you were thankful for your life and what exactly is in front of you? You're entire argument is off a miss spelling. KYS
>>696486048 Dude I actually just tried to get a giggle out of you. Sorry that you took it the other way but developing a sense of humor about lifes strange ways is what helped me in making things seem manageable or atleast tolerable.
Hope you do well but I won't an hero just now or any time soon.
>>696475696 >Can't stop craving. 10 years off oxy here. Will wake up tomorrow wanting it just as bad as I did on day 1. It is the first thing on my mind when I wake up, and the last thought I have at night. Get used to it. It never goes away.
>>696485921 Anything you need booze to do isn't worth doing.
The way I see it, without it, fun stuff may be less fun but depressing, stressful and arduous things are orders of magnitude easier to deal with. Also, long term? What do you gain from booze? What's the ROI? More friends that don't really give a fuck about you because they vanish once the party stops?
You find out who your real companions are when you stop drinking and look around to see who's helping you figure your fucking life out.
Anyone who isn't associating with you because of lack of booze is missing out on who you are anyway. Including yourself. Fuck em.
1 year off oxy.. My connect got locked up and I decided to quit cold turkey after that. I was taking upwards of 100 mg a day.. Smoking K9's too. I had terrible withdrawals for months but I finally got over them. No cravings after that either. I guess I don't have too much of an addictive personality?
Started going to AA 5 weeks ago. Not touched a drop since. Feel amazing. No fog in my head, no hangovers. Got motivation, focus and drive. The realisation that i was an alcoholic was probably one of the things to ever happen to me.
>>696485348 Sometimes I wish it were fake. When I have to skip a paycheck because it's slow and the debt my mother left us by embezzling hundreds of thousands of dollars while mentally abusing myself and my brother, and exploding on us once we started to unravel her coils of manipulation and malice as she slipped further into the clutches of booze and ADD meds while blaming the flailing business on me to everyone she ever met.
The most true thing I've ever experienced is the victory of truth and honesty over deceit and greed. My own mother turned against me and wove a web to try and tangle me in, to wrap me up in a cocoon with her failures and feed me to them hoping to reveal a second chance at my sacrifice.
And she was sorely fucking disappointed when I maintained my own path, patiently and honestly. Fuck liars. They can build walls and summon shitstorms a thousand times bigger than you can dream of, but neither of those things can stop a stream that wants to become a river.
>>696486919 I've been coming to that conclusion, but it's tought coming to that conclusion alone without any help...the only thing I miss out on, is just meeting women, at bars or parties...but I know random encounters that dont have any alc are the ones I really should care about. It's a tough cycle man, and I'm lost.
>>696486392 I find it funny how you actually think I would care about you getting a giggle out of that. Do whatever you want with your life man, I could care less. You continue to neglect problems in front of you to post on a internet chat board. Good on you man! Finally coming out of your shell!
>>696487735 It's hard to find people who have similar interests to me when I'm sober. I've been retooled into a person that maybe I don't even know. It's really hard admitting that I was wrong and alcoholically fueled to believe in things that I may not or may believe in
>>696487623 It's easy to feel that way. But you're only going to catch what's attracted to your bait.
Fuck people, right now. Set some goals for yourself, and you'll meet women in your career field. You'll find a woman who wants to date you that you met in an office, or in a lab, or wherever you work. Not because she was drunk and you made a shitty joke about breaking bad. But because she saw YOU moving forward in your life and she wanted to ride shotgun. The same with your friends.
You have no reason to listen to me. But your alternative is to keep explaining to yourself and others why you can't win.
>>696488071 Yeah, so explore that. Cause guess what? Now you're stoking your own fire. You get to *actually decide* if you are interested in something. And you get to discover that shit like you were a kid, but with an adult wallet and brain.
I always thought I couldn't actually draw or paint. Turns out I was wrong and I get to practice without having my motivation siphoned by booze.
Right now you have to recover emotionally and so does your life. The people you call friends, like scabs, will slowly become less attached, and eventually you won't notice it but they will be gone. That has to happen and it's gonna be slow and depressing. But afterwards you get to realize that they don't even fucking know you. You were just a face in the blur that they call "the weekend."
Fuck em. You make friends with yourself first and then you two will meet people who you like.
>>696486972 And also I'm 19 so spending 10 grand if not more on that while keeping a roof over my head and food in my stomach was impossible half the time I wouldn't eat because I would rather spend the money on weed and still keep a roof over my head
Why is is that you two have given me more value than any rehab or AA system has given me? I really am trying to show how appreciative of you two. You have brought me to tears and happiness. There actually is an exit to this hole that I currently am in, and it feels great hearing people that can give me advice to my situation. I want to thank you personally.
>>696489237 I haven't found any of that just yet. I'm pursuing pre-law while having a graphic design business on the side and I have no found any of that at 22...Im young and I will continue trying my best.
>>696484527 Thank you. I've gotten more support out of that paragraph than I have out of anyone in real life and although your just some random stranger on the internet it means more than you think. Thank you
I'm back on meth, was 3 years off it. When I got dumped I didn't see any reason not to. It's getting bleak but I'd rather have nothing and be miserable than be a thief or scoundrel. I'm gonna get a job just to smoke a fuckton on the reg but hopefully I'll get caught in a crisis or die to avoid the years of walking corpse. I hate everyone I have to deal with because of it, but im at the mercy of these little callow people. Where can I find a recipe?
>>696489895 If you are trying to return to that childlike wonder or that wonder that you had while during a relationship why go back to a substance or false feeling that never wants you to return to those genuine feelings that were once YOU feeling YOU?!
>>696489914 Not really you just have to do it. A few people I just flat out stopped talking to and ignore all there calls and the rest I told I stopped smoking and can't be around it and they just said there not gonna stop and it's all they really do so they chose the weed over me and told me without directly saying it
>>696490210 Smoking the hope from your head...it's hard but worth it...you are currently in a state of constant bewilderment, misleading and constant bullshit...what if I told you the world can be yours, the world or personal bubble that you imagine in your pipe filled dreams, well you know what? IT CAN...If you want it. Drugs are the easy part, drugs make you feel like you accomplished everything, like it is all okay..like you are the god of your universe...well you know what? You are star matter....you are next to worth it..get on your fucking saddle and saddle up...you can pander to the lowest denominator of yourself and be a pussy who depends on substances to change his psyche and world around him. Or, you can take life by the balls, and begin to enact changes that change your world that you see now into the one that you see in your mind....
>>696490425 Just showing how pathetic the friendship was at first? MAn I hate highschool, forcing us into bullshit at a very young age man. Now, we're here having to sort out the details...Oh well. I'd rather know about it than falling for it.
clean on heroin since 1/20/14 recently passed 2.5 years. for the first year didnt drink and also stopped smoking pot but i was on suboxone. Now i have 1-3 beers every month or two and smoke weed slightly more often. Best advice I can think of is make friends with other sober people and completely cut out anyone who will make you slip up because it will happen.
tl;dr got off heroin 2.5 years ago. I can answer questions or give advice. not perfect but i have experience and know anything can help
>>696490426 Is anything that you are scared of worth it? Sobriety? Talking to a girl? Pursuing a passion? It will be hard, but nothing worth doing is hard..just realize how rare you are in regards to galaxies and planets...you are a conscious sentient being on a fucking planet talking to others from states or countries away from you discussing your problems...is that really worth taking a simple pill that has been invented by other humans ( starmatter ) DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO IN YOUR LIFETIME.......
>>696490821 It's a slippery slope, is the next month going to turn into Now i have 4-5 beers every month or two and smoke weed slightly even more often? Your judgement man...I know when there is smoke there is fire, if you think your problem is becoming bigger ask for help or use online resources to find solutions.
>>696490571 You're right. I need to remain faithful to psychedelics. I don't want to sound as narcissistic as I actually am, but it would seriously only take like a year work to turn me into fucking Thor. I'm in some Nietzsche depths with a head full of Rush songs but it comes down to that I am going to die the pathetic pile I knew I'd become out of indecision
>>696490822 I want to be completely off any substance. I really do want all those emotions back. Bupe makes everything just meh, I dont feel any emotions really. I do have a career path as a boilermaker/welder so I got that going for me at least. My hobbies are mainly video games and guitar. I guess I kind of am shy around girls idk tho I want to get myself right, and also not really up for getting feelings for some girl that could end up crazy.
However I plan to get my dose to the point where I take .5 daily, and once my body adjusts Ill skip a day etc etc to try and make it as painless as possible. My sub doc better prescribe me some benzos and clonidine tho when I jump off.
>>696491054 The difference between me and you, is that I understand how hard it is...I've been where you are and I undestand how vehemently opposed to anyone trying to make you understand how your weekendly wins off your favorite drug are actually infact just fake uppers or downers that further make your problems worse...don't believe me? I don't care. You'll still be a drug addicted shit poster on 4chan, and I'll be back out of my heart giving advice to bring people out of the clutches of addiction. I meant this for a more counter but I figured it'd work for you :0
>>696474715 Can't drop the drugs >dad has shitty casee of ALS >is getting feeding tube and put in a wheelchair tomorrow >me and wife just got married in january >we've been having issues >go to visit dad today >in tears and says he wants to be a grandfather before he dies O shit Fuck >also says he wants me to stay off everything at least until he passes >I'm only 18 and so is wife >so tonight I'm on 60 mg of hydro >me and wife are going to smoke the last bit of our weed (about an 8th left ) >then end the night with 2 Xanax each >tomorrow starts baby making season I feel horrible but my dad never fucking cries at all this motherfucker still drives to his appointments and will still try to walk without his cane or braces
>>696491294 Stop thinking about your life and where it's headed if your doc. prescribes something or not.. thats fear. What do you want from your life? Stop blaming others and taking a pill to make it feel alright when in reality its just a shortcut...be on your deathbed and be genuinely happy you lived a life worth living...
>>696491413 At the same time life is so fucking dull without substance I've been dabbling in anything that comes around you name it meth coke opiates Salvia just about anything out there besides RC's and haven't done too many hallucinogens outside of shrooms and a very mild San pedro experience and tweaking binge hallucinations
>>696491525 Youre damn right thats fear. I have every right to fear dope sickness. It is the scariest shit ever. Even getting on subs was hard man having to go to the clinic in full WD, off of fentanyl no less. Crying/screaming/puking driving 30min to get there.. ill never forget that day. Fear is the only thing holding me back from getting off suboxone. I almost gaurentee others feel the same and I can understand how people take bupe for years before trying to stop. But I know I cant let myself do that.
>>696491661 The logical solution : STOP. I undestand it's hard hearing that from someone else. But I can see in your near future what this abuse might cause you...do you want completely and utter bullshit surrounding you day to day, ranging from paying your baby mama or drug addiction? Find the life you want without drugs..
>>696491614 I haven't figured out underlying issues why I do them I figure there was issues at first now it's become just a life is dull and boring outside of substance but seeing him cry really hit my soul so going out with a bang and then going to hit sprouts aND go all organic no soda and shit exercise hit the gym and try to fulfill my dad's last wishes I know it's going to be shitty as fuck and there's goING to be those fuck it days and wife is completely on board too so that helps I mean if she wasn't she would get the boot because my dad didn't even get to retire he's only 39 and probably won't live another year
>>696491413 I understand the actual dependency weed creates , but it's not something you have to feel too bad about man. If you go two to three to four days in-between joints it's so fucking nice to get stoned again. And your wife can get all kinds of thc in her, the baby might be less competitive but it'll be happy and easygoing:3
I'm real sorry about yer Pa, man.
Guitar welder you sound like you're on a real good fucking track, man.
Getting high used to be fun. Used to be chill, why is that diminishing so fast?
I fantasize about getting a huge sack of dope ($200 or so) and smoking it all with a hooker, or in a frosty forest somewhere far away from home and other folk. Just making sure it's enough to pop my heart somewhere pleasant; or fucking a big fake tit blonde. Damn. Is that common and/or eeally improbable ?
>>696491969 Oh my god man, you are so unique, dope sickness, man you are so unique. I didn't use you're heroin jargon and I'm sorry for that. My mind has reverted to a fearless, non addicted, pussified vision that has been coerced into believing it self by drugs.
Listen, only YOU know the solution to your problem, people can help and propel you to the solution, but the only one that can actually start doing the problems and finding the solution is YOU.
You know you think you got that shit under control but if I’m doing it every day how could I be having shit under control? You gotta be happy with life as it is; with your mind clear, you know? It’s kind of crazy because even when I think about like myself in the future I think yeah I’ll have like a little secret room in my house and I can go escape for the night and get stoned. It’s kind of fucked up I guess. It’s like I’m incorporating getting high into my future. That’s probably not the best look
I can say I'm addicted to weed , but I'm too poor so I can only afford about 250$ worth monthly. I'm also addicted to victimize myself and always blame others for my foolish behavior or choices. But I'm pretty ok cuz I'm not a neet.
>>696492104 Okay? If that doesn't sound appealing why curl up in a ball and let it happen? Make things that you want come to fruition. It's very, very hard and I'm on a path like yours but I don't feel the need to be a pussy to others around me and have them verified before I VERIFY MYSELF for its self worth. IF YOU AREN'T GETTING WHAT YOU WANT OUT OF YOUR LIFE. STOP DOING THE SAME SHIT THAT'S CAUSING IT. CHANGE CAUSES CHANGE....
>>696492296 And you've come to a conclusion where it's not normal...so you gonna let it continue or find a solution? Either way the earth doesn't give a fuck about you, so why put any value into to either?
>>696492462 The earth doesn't give a fuck about you or that response..just know that there is a life without drugs and your constant hatred of everything around you. I hope you find help man, drunks dont have to be the end all , be all. Women are great BTW
>>696492204 It's not even weed that's the issue it's just being fucked up to enjoy life that's going to be fucking hard >also married a chick that will snort a line of coke off my dick Best shit ever was me being doped on opiates while she was on some molly >that full throbbing dope dick >told her she couldn't make me cum it's impossible on ops >that bitch rode my cock from sundown to sun up
>>696492074 Kill the dragon before it kills you, If you think you might be addicted to cocaine, please get help. Even if it is just a friend you trust who can watch over you for a few days and make sure you're okay. I quit heroin alone on someone's couch with nothing and nobody to help me. I cannot even begin to tell you how that feels.
>>696492462 so i have to understand your dope sickness to help you? get the fuck over yourself, if someone hasn't shot up your cocktail of benzos or black tar heroin doesnt mean their advice is any more potent to solving your problem. Get over yourself, you arent godly..you are actually a speck of starmatter on a planet that is having TRUMP AND CLINTON FACE OFF FOR PRESIDENT FOR THE MOST POWERFUL COUNTRY IN THE WORLD. YOU ARENT IMPORTANT. You're on the side that could care less about other humans dying or living.. I'm here trying to help humans that see dying as a solution...to let them know continuing on without a SUBSTANCE abuse probelm is a existence worth living.
>>696493010 Yup, fuck the agenda against cops...constantly vilified while holding the hardest job in the world against DINDU's who wont get the fact that being passive and listening to officers orders will keep you alive..
I keep my tolerance low, indulge 2 or 3 days and take a break a few weeks.
If you take drugs everyday, you're fucked.
I stuck with my promise to never snort or shoot, it has worked out. I can get a nod from 15mg oxycodone. You junkies ruin it for the rest of us who have control and for those who need it for legitimate pain relief.
>>696493275 What about the one who was chading a disabled man when police took the guys truck for a gun and then shot his care taker who was laying on the ground with his hands in the air calmly explaining the situation?
I injected 3 whole marijuanas earlier today It was a fucking rush like you wouldnt belive. I felt like I could run forever Which I would have done if I didn't keep bumping shit with my throbbing viagra cock 10/10 would butplug marijuanas
>>696493270 Kek our addiction are just different than yours Make sure you get your coffee on the way out to mcdonalds in the morning to get your mcgriddle like you do every morning and if you're late and miss those you get really cranky and bitchy or hey make sure you get your soda from quick trip or make sure you get your porn time in before mommy and daddy get home because you gotta do it or you might be an angry boy all night >everyone has addiction mine just is more involved
I was weekend warrioring roxi 30's, then I only started looking forward to the weekend. Then I bought then on a weekday here and there. Then I bought them everyday. Then I moved to whatever opiates I could get my hands on, opanas, heroin, dillys, poppy seed tea, anything.
>>696494037 Don't think you are unique is the first part, the one that rips through your addiction. YOU AREN'T SPECIAL. What you have done has been done by someone else and you should never feel special for continuing degenerate acts. Go ahead and do those pills, rail em, snort em, get that high. What's it going to do? Further turn you away from the problems in front of you? >>696494037 Life wasn't supposed to be easy.
Stopped smoking weed about four months ago. Not because of addiction, but because i couldn't get a job without doing so.
While smoking was fun, i mostly used it as medication for my severe depression and anxiety. After stopping I'm battling fucking awful body pain from the anxiety and depression and all day every day i just want to kill myself. Which ironically makes it impossible to land a job because people pick up on that shit no matter how hard you try to hide it. Which increases anxiety and depression, which you then can't medicate for (literally nothing else works for me), which makes it impossible to find a job.... fucking never ending cycle of bullshit.
Fuck prohibition. That shit does not work anyways.
Somebody give me some fucking shrooms so i can get a fresh perspective, fuck.
>>696494485 God dam those were just examples you fucking faggot holy shit Natural selection is the first thing I think of when I see your fucking responses You must be a perfect god in the flesh with absolutely no addiction whatsoever Do us all a favor and just fucking drink the bleach already I heard it helps with your meditation
been addicted to using drugs in general , of which a year really badly. Recovered on my own, but now facing social anxiety, mild depression, and psychosis.And probably a bunch of other crap, but I realized that all the medicine and psychiatrist appointments where making it worse. I have been clean for over 3 months now, but I really hope I'll start feeling (a lot) better over time.. I sold shit, so I was always able to take it whenever I wanted, and it got out of hand big time. shit I used; Cocaine, ketamine, mdma, speed, GHB, nitrous, weed, 4fmp, 2cb.. and stuff which I took, but was not really addicted to: Xanax, alcohol, weed, LSD
>>696494902 Nah, got a years funding at £26k and after 18 months i was working and paying rent to them. I didnt like anyone to move out with and to complete the programme you had to move out with peers.
>>696495306 I'm trying to these days, I finally have a good job, I'm not broke all the time and I'm actually planning on buying a house soon.
I would really like a relationship but I'm worried about telling a girl about my problems and her abandoning me. Part of me feels like if I could find the right person to give me that push, I could do it.
>>696495143 Why do people insist that weed isn't "addictive"? I've sold it for more than 5 years. I've known people who spent the biggest part of their paycheck (almost all) at weed the moment they receive it. I've known people who prefered weed over eating and 3 of my friends went to a rehab just for weed. Smoking in moderation is OK, but the problem are the people who start smoking 'erryday from a young age. Weed induced apathy isn't a joke. There's no need for a 15y/old to smoke before school, during lunch and after school and be stoned for the biggest part of the day.lso, apathy induced by weed is not cool. You cant just numb bad feelings. You numb them all, especially over time as a regular smoker. When I take a break, the bad times feel a bit worse, more emotional... but the good also feels better...with stronger emotions. I get an ecstatic lively feeling when something good happened and I am not stoned. These feelings remind me that I am alive and human which is another reason substances shouldn't be praised so highly, like extremists in a cult. TL;DR weed is okay in moderation, but it's still a drug and shouldn't be used excessively
>>696495557 Well its quite retarded, i.e. while sleeping over at my friend I experienced him trying to rape me, I was unable to react, move, or do anything.. but I really felt, and experienced it all.. if I had something to hurt him with at that time i would've probably killed him. Though after which felt like an hour or so I was able to move, and the hand I felt on my leg wasn't even there.. weird huh
>>696495989 that's sleep paralysis bro. Happens more often to people when they use drugs. There seems to be a link between MDMA and sleep paralysis. Even a couple of days after MDMA, the chance of sleep paralysis is much higher. The hallucination is super real, frightening but you just can't fucking move. It happened to alot of people I know (druggies)
>>696495747 I agree wholeheartedly. I starting smoking heavily at 15, and it is by far my biggest regret in life. I've spend more than half my paycheck as you say on that shit for the last 4 years. Just thinking about how much money that is, man.. Fuck.
I really, really wish that I could do it in moderation, but I know the second I touch that shit I fall back in.
>>696495958 I've had sleep paralysis, but this was way different. The psychiatrist even stated that I had suffered trauma from it back then. Even now I still don't trust my friend, like.. I can tell myself it didn't happen out of logic, but I literally felt him doing.. stuff.. My entire body was shaking throughout the experience, kicking my legs, etc.. but still it kept on going
>>696496192 I'm really sure it's sleep paralysis man. Everthing you say is spot on. The hallucination of touch also happens when you experience sleep paralysis. The fact that you've experienced sleep paralysis before means that you'll probably have it again (and had it again). Do yourself a favor and look up lots of stories of sleep paralysis. You'll be amazed how much your story represents one. My friend is still traumatised by one, said he felt a hand tightening his grip around his neck. Says it's SUPER freaky
I'm on wellbutrin now and feel pretty great most of the time
Nothing really compares to how I felt when I met my wife though, I was clearly on the up swing and that chemical burst that you get when youre in love was better than anything Id ever felt, still feel it
All though had I been on wellbutrin, I wonder how it would've felt
If I could just have the Ups without the bad decision making, the headaches and insomnia and no Downs, you bet man
>>696496915 >on the up swing and that chemical burst that you get when youre in love people talk about how drugs ruin you for life because of how amazing they feel. they never experienced what you just described though. fucking amazing shit, man, right on. i hope you can stay balanced though.
>>696474715 Shit. Drinking now at 8am. Done rehab 6 times, hospital about 20 times, my body is totally broken. Stepping in front of a speeding truck is next. At least opiates didnt get me. Dont drink, kids.
I have a severe caffeine addiction. It sounds stupid, I know, but I will literally drink/take caffeine pills until I have a cardiac arrest. It has happened once.
My usual drink was two five hours, redbull, and an energy pill as a chaser.
The fact that the shit is available everywhere and no one took me seriously wasn't helping. I would break down and cry a lot. Finally tried to put my foot down. The headache and the fatigue lasted 2 weeks and 3 days straight. I was back on the shit in a week, because all it took was "one bad day" where I felt just too damn tired of everything. I've been clean now for a month and a half and it is easily the hardest thing I've ever done.
>>696475063 It breaks my heart to hear that, but dont decide the past couple of weeks is "starting again". Its a war, you know you can win it, don't let a single battle cost you the war you ARE WINNING! (yes, 'are'! you are still very much in the game right now!) You know how they call guys who have fucked the same girl "Weener Cousins"? this Addiction...this "Man's Ruin"...shes a super cunt. a wicked disgusting bitch. and she fucked you. shes fucking me. For what its worth, im happy to consider you my weener cousin and i hope you can put that bottle down, man. i really truky genuinely pray you find your strength again. I'll be thinking about you.
>>696500432 Wow, you are a fucking retarded dip shit. These meeting attending fruits are all the same. You're going to think about this random person that you have zero frame of reference for? What a hero
Anyone here kick a coffee addiction before? I am 25 and trying to constantly be working so I can be successful early in life. Coffee makes me 5 times more motivated, so I'm pretty cavalier about drinking several cups a day. Still I try to have days or even stretches of days where I don't drink any, and on those days I get nasty headaches. As I understand it, it's a pretty easy addiction to kick, correct? You just get past those initial headaches for a couple of days, then you don't get them any more. Still I worry that I won't have as much energy without it. I remember having way more energy when I was younger.
>>696483509 Are you me? Been smoking since I was 14, but started selling at 15 and always had a steady supply of weed and income. All of my money still went straight to weed, even when dealing. The last 2 years I've easily smoked 2-3 or more grams a day, my tolerance is has no limit. I vape with a volcano, but it takes 3-4 bags vaped rapidly to get high. I don't know who I am if I take weed away, because that's all I ever did when I was young. The only way I can stop, is when I know I will smoke again. I just don't know what to do when sober, as everything is so incredibly boring and unsatisfying. I look pale as fuck, with dark circles around my eyes. I haven't cooked in half a year, most of the times I eat around 1 meal a day, I go to sleep at 4-5 am and get up at 4-5pm. It's obvious I have more problems than just weed, but in some way I feel like it takes me down but keeps me going.
>>696500907 Took me about 6 years to quit benzos. I still dabble every couple months but it takes about 16 to 20mg for me to feel even the slightest buzz so money wise its not worth it. Have take take half a months of script worth in one day no bueno
>>696501392 yo dude i'm at your point now, just stop. I know it's fucking boring and shit and everything is so uninteresting, but just begin to work on yourself, you can actually make that enjoyable. Stop smoking weed, and start playing the game of reinventing yourself. Change your entire life, start taking cold showers instead of hot, start going for walks, i like to go for walks where i pretend i'm high, when i'm high and i walk around i just like looking at clouds and thinking how pretty they are, and you don't need to be stoned to do that
>>696500726 try switching to green tea, you'll still get some caffeine and all of the benefits associated drinking green tea, i used coffee to help me with intermittent fasting to stave off hunger, when i started bulking again i cut my coffee intake and experienced the worst headaches of my life, started drinking green tea and it helped a lot.
>>696500907 Bruuuuuv I lost my mind coming off em. I was awake dreaming, handed teo laptops and my htc one cause i thought my housemate was hacking mr through wifi and was going on cp to get me nicked. I even rang police to ckme to my house to watch my cursor moving on the screen haha
Please support this website by donating Bitcoins to 16mKtbZiwW52BLkibtCr8jUg2KVUMTxVQ5 If a post contains copyrighted or illegal content, please click on that post's [Report] button and fill out a post removal request
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from that site. This means that 4Archive shows an archive of their content. If you need information for a Poster - contact them.