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Fuck. Addiction/Recovery Thread?

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 239
Thread images: 22

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Fuck. Addiction/Recovery Thread?
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>>696474715
clean off everything 9 months
>>
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>Addicted to chicken noodles
>Cause several holocausts if does not constantly eat chicken noodlies
>FUCK YOU MUM I WANT MY FUCKING CHICKIE NOODLIES
>FUUCKINGG RRERRRRREEEEEEEEEE
>>
>>696474715
was an alcoholic last year. spent over half a year completely sober, and started going full alcoholic again a couple weeks ago
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>>696475063
stop. go to a meeting.
>>
How I quit was set goals for each month I didn't smoke and I would relapse every now and then but I'm offically clean now
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>>696474857
I went into treatment for snorting pills/dope. Clean for like 4 months, used once about 5 weeks ago -- Took responsibility for it. Would have relapsed tonight but dope boy missed my text... Saw it as divine intervention, if you will. Can't stop craving.
>>
NA fag here. 5 years sober. Quit doing smack 10 years ago, but started drinking again after a while. Turned into an alcohol :( Doing pretty good now. 5 years feels like forever, but also not that long. Hard to describe.

Whenever I think back to being strung out, it was just so fucking horrible. And any time I see "drunk man kills 3" I just thank god I was so fucking lucky. Like some off duty cop in NYC just killed some people. Fuck that could have been me.
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>>696475696
you got some numbers? call some people. the urge will let up after a while. Are you program ( aa / na ) ?
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>>696475063
7 months off the juice for me. Fuck, I miss it!
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>>696475696
Go to a meeting bro. Call someone tell them how your feeling or shit do what your doing now. Fuck that shit. I used to do smack every day for years thinkinng about it makes me sick. gotta get to that point tho. Even now i still have moments where it crosses my mind but thats what being honest and having a sponsor is for..

i never believed the NA shit but now im pumped about it and generally have a good time with it.
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>>696475967
really? why'd you quit?
>>
Smoke weed erryday. Going to quit hopefully for college. I'm going to miss the music most of all
>>
haven't smoked weed for like four days straight, I'll have to treat myself for that, with a nice big joint of course.
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>>696476213
Was ruining my life, both at home and at work. Really fucked up at work, and basically was facing the sack if I didn't clean up.
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>>696475918
I do AA/NA but I'm in an organized IOP program on suboxone -- so i shouldn't have cravings at all. It's not even about getting high... I can't explain it, exactly. Self-sabotage, I guess. Things are good being clean, but shit really hasn't gotten better. I'm not like 'dry drunk' or anything, but like, I just pictured myself in a better place if I was sober and I don't feel it.

I've talked to people.. Honestly, tonight was a win. I felt great for a while knowing that I walked away. I could have picked up elsewhere, I could have called my dude instead of texting him -- It would have been easy but I resisted it. I'm just like stuck in that train of thought.
>>
9 months off heroin. Proud of you all.
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>>696476766
the world still sucks when your sober. It's not like your only problem was using drugs fam.

Also get off that suboxin shit. Fuckin garbage.

worse then dope imo
>>
Just hit my 3 years clean of of oxy / other opoids.

I went cold turkey, no help. I still smoke cigs and weed.

Quality of life is much improved.
>>
>>696476989
same here man 9months. Life is so much better. Now im just addicted to 2d girls and anime, kekekke
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>>696477072
I'm actually kind of pissed I let them put me on subs. I just wanted any treatment I could get but now I feel almost as trapped on subs as I was on dope. Only now I don't pay for it. I see the doc on Thurs, I'm telling her I want off the shit.
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My wow addiction is giving me less time to provide love to myself.
>MFW when only having enough time to wank 3 times a day
Curse you WoW addiction
>>
18 months clean, used once (emotional, relapsed) 18 months ago, and clean 2.5 years before that. 4 years total with one use in there. Drugs suck.
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>>696477406
Stay on them for a few months while your life improves. Get a job. Pay off debts. Clean things up in your personal life. Do a medical detox when you need to come off subs.
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I just wanna say that i didnt expect this much support in a shit hole like 4chan goes to show you. theres ppl out there who care enough to write something positive.
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>>696477256
Fuckin' holo. Better than coke.
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>>696477406
i got put on vivitrol. No feelings of being high and deep down i know it will suck if it try to use. Plus u can jump off and on it. So say you get off of it. Say some tragic shit happens and your getting worried your gonna use u can take it and your good for a month. Just kinda a helper. I dig it.
>>
On a vacation in Ocean City, Maryland with my girl.
Didn't take weed or cigarettes with me.
Weed really isn't addictive, it's more of a personal want to smoke, but FUCK ME I want tobacco.
I'm a gross motherfucker that rips up cigs and puts the tobacco on top of bowls in my bong, and on top of that I smoke cigarettes themselves.
Nothing can compare to the rush of tobacco. I have vodka but drinking isn't nearly as fun.
Still have about 2 weeks of vacation to go. On day 5 without any smoke. Kill me
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>>696477931
So you like Vivitrol? How are you doing with cravings?
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>>696475193
i'm having too much fun with it. besides, i'm still highly functional, and i'm not at the point where my life is being hindered in any significant way by it
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>>696477671
It really means a lot that so many people have jumped in. Sometimes it's easier to put stuff out there when you're anonymous. It helps a lot. It really does.
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>>696478321
None bro.. 9months in.

I dont even notice the vivitrol

But i mean if i start workin a stupid program and being dumb im gonna wanna use something. So its more of a mind thing i just know that if all else fails that vivitrol is there to stop me.

>>696477828

yes holo is the shit

this is oc i made .
>>
>>696478971
That's brilliant. Props.
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>>696478576
what kind of guitar is that?
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>>696479460
a cheap useless but sexy squier strat
>>
Whats the best way to get around the time release mechanism of oral morphine?? I've got some of the capsules with the tiny balls inside if this helps...Zomorph I think they are called.

Cheers.
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>>696476592
Haven't smoked weed for 3 weeks, today is the first day I haven't been angry as fuck. Literally could've ripped off someone's head most days.
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>>696480364
i've considered becoming a full stoner, is it worth it? i've smoked weed at most a few times a week for 2-3 weeks straight
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>>696480454
Depends on the person. Makes me paranoid and generally intolerant of family and friends when I come down. I don't think it's worth it.
>>
>>696480454
>>696480622
Quitting made me feel like I had splinters in my brain for 2 weeks and I acted irrationally a lot.
>>
Stay strong bros.

I dont drink. Smoked weed maybe 5 times in my mid teenage years. But, other than that don't do shit. I have gone through multiple psychiatric medicine withdrawals, 2 cold turkey, so maybe I can relate a bit.
>>
Drinking is fun for a while, but eventually drinking for alcoholics or people who cannot control their intake affect their life choices. It's easy to say fuck everyone, "im right" but it takes a man to say look I have a fucking problem and I need to counter this. I don't need a fucking substance to make me feel okay at night, I don't need a substance to talk to girls anymore. I NEED ME. MYSELF. The one who was born within me.
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>>696480454
I have smoked everyday for the past 5 years and just a few days ago I realized how much of a problem I have. I've spent more that 10 grand on weed, bowls, and shit like that I've turned down jobs that pay double what I do cause I can't smoke. I litterly cried last night because I hate myself for wasting so much money on it. The mental withdrawal sucks so bad I wanna kill myself just so I stop craving smoking a bowl. I litterly have to drop all my friends because they all smoke and being around or even talking about it make the temptation to smoke to much not to. Weed made me waste 5 years of my life I'll never get back. If you only take one thing from this it's moderation spend more days a week sober than not it will help you in the long run.
>>
Drank like I had to because I felt like I did for 7 years or so. Swollen liver, fucked up my galblader or so says the yellow creeping back away from my sclera. My Doctor says they can't see it, but I have high bilirubin. Oct of 2014 was my last drink. And June 14th 2015 was the 3rd birthday of my family's bar. It was also the two week birthday of the new bank account I had to open when my mother staged a coup with the landlord to convince him I was the reason we were $20k in the hole to him for rent.

We just passed the 4 year mark, and tonight actually I checked the mail and found our renewed license that I was able to pay for after hauling the business out of ~$50k debt. I've gotten 2 raises and the worst mistakes I have to worry about now are hiring shitty staff that chase customers away until I fire them and pick up a bunch of shifts.

I bartend and own a bar for a living and I don't touch the stuff after a crippling physical dependency.

Make yourself afraid of nothing but yourself when you don't respect your challenges.
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>>696478213
why not buy a pack of cigarettes sir?
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>>696483509
what's the mental withdrawal like?
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>>696483509
Thank you for being so honest bro, and honestly go easy on yourself, the fact that you have acknowledged it is much farther than some people dare to go. People become addicted to things for comfort and pleasure, so the more you do something the less comfortable you feel when you don't do it. And vice versa, to break a habit- so stay strong and also chillax, find the right balance :)
>>
Quitters.
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>>696484111
This shit right here is powerful, I'm glad I read that, and I'm pissed the media will never pick up your story. I;m pissed at myself I have to come to 4chan to get stories like this, even if they are fake.
>>
HEY BITCHES
ALCOHOL IS THE BEST
>>
>>696483509
>>696484527
I've quit smoking weed a few times now after smoking 20 cones a day for more than 10 years straight. It's rough. I had a few beers and codeine pain killers each day to ease the yearning. But once you get through it it's like a natural high all the time, for me anyway. Wish I could have one every now and then but I don't want to go through the rough patches again.
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I currently have to take a low dose of benzos for anxiety, and man I can feel it if I miss a dose. I don't know how people who abuse them do it. Honestly kinda pisses me off too, knowing that a lot of people really on them for anxiety while others get a fake diagnosis to abuse the shit out of them
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>>696484290
Terrible constant depression mixed with mood swings and complete loss of my appetite I feel nauseous just trying to chew food and swallowing it is imposable because I almost puke when I do
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>>696475829

I am sorry for what happend to you.
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>>696484111
I am currently entering college for the second time and I guarantee alchohol will be introduced once again. What are some ways to continue on my life course with out circumstances from outside interfering while still remaining fun or open to fucking women?
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>>696485845
Funny meme, however not everything in life is a meme. You seem to come on here to berate and make fun of people rather than dealing what is in front of you. How's that mom of yours? How are you siblings? When's the last time you were thankful for your life and what exactly is in front of you? You're entire argument is off a miss spelling. KYS
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>>696485748
was the nausea sort of like an imaginary dizziness in your head or was it real queasy-about-to-puke kind of nausea
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>>696485748
This
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>>696486070
Real queasy about to puke kind. I have dry heaved from it because of the fact there's nothing in my stomach
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>>696486048
Dude I actually just tried to get a giggle out of you. Sorry that you took it the other way but developing a sense of humor about lifes strange ways is what helped me in making things seem manageable or atleast tolerable.

Hope you do well but I won't an hero just now or any time soon.
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>>696475696
>Can't stop craving.
10 years off oxy here. Will wake up tomorrow wanting it just as bad as I did on day 1. It is the first thing on my mind when I wake up, and the last thought I have at night. Get used to it. It never goes away.
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>>696485921
Anything you need booze to do isn't worth doing.

The way I see it, without it, fun stuff may be less fun but depressing, stressful and arduous things are orders of magnitude easier to deal with. Also, long term? What do you gain from booze? What's the ROI? More friends that don't really give a fuck about you because they vanish once the party stops?

You find out who your real companions are when you stop drinking and look around to see who's helping you figure your fucking life out.

Anyone who isn't associating with you because of lack of booze is missing out on who you are anyway. Including yourself. Fuck em.
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>>696486382
jesus christ i didn't know weed could do that to you
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>>696486426
Shiiit man! Never touching that stuff. Thanks for the heads up.
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1 year off oxy.. My connect got locked up and I decided to quit cold turkey after that. I was taking upwards of 100 mg a day.. Smoking K9's too. I had terrible withdrawals for months but I finally got over them. No cravings after that either. I guess I don't have too much of an addictive personality?
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>>696486426

same, if you put a pile of oc 30's in front of me right now i would happily kill myself with it
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>>696486972
The nausea didn't last more than a week for me, after that food was ok. Just had to stick to bland stuff.
>>
Started going to AA 5 weeks ago. Not touched a drop since. Feel amazing. No fog in my head, no hangovers. Got motivation, focus and drive.
The realisation that i was an alcoholic was probably one of the things to ever happen to me.
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>>696486972
Yea just because something doesn't have anything addictive in it a mental addiction can still form and the withdrawal is just as bad as if it was physically addictive
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>>696485348
Sometimes I wish it were fake. When I have to skip a paycheck because it's slow and the debt my mother left us by embezzling hundreds of thousands of dollars while mentally abusing myself and my brother, and exploding on us once we started to unravel her coils of manipulation and malice as she slipped further into the clutches of booze and ADD meds while blaming the flailing business on me to everyone she ever met.

The most true thing I've ever experienced is the victory of truth and honesty over deceit and greed. My own mother turned against me and wove a web to try and tangle me in, to wrap me up in a cocoon with her failures and feed me to them hoping to reveal a second chance at my sacrifice.

And she was sorely fucking disappointed when I maintained my own path, patiently and honestly. Fuck liars. They can build walls and summon shitstorms a thousand times bigger than you can dream of, but neither of those things can stop a stream that wants to become a river.
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>>696486919
I've been coming to that conclusion, but it's tought coming to that conclusion alone without any help...the only thing I miss out on, is just meeting women, at bars or parties...but I know random encounters that dont have any alc are the ones I really should care about. It's a tough cycle man, and I'm lost.
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>>696487398
Make sure you find people outside of AA who provide the same buffer. Just people who want to be YOUR friend. Someone who can ignore booze when you're hanging out saved my life.
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>>696486392
I find it funny how you actually think I would care about you getting a giggle out of that. Do whatever you want with your life man, I could care less. You continue to neglect problems in front of you to post on a internet chat board. Good on you man! Finally coming out of your shell!
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>>696487540
Commendable. I enjoy reading stories such as yours. They are diamonds in the rough here on the Tranny/fur porn extravaganza that /b/ has become.
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>>696487735
It's hard to find people who have similar interests to me when I'm sober. I've been retooled into a person that maybe I don't even know. It's really hard admitting that I was wrong and alcoholically fueled to believe in things that I may not or may believe in
>>
>>696487749
I talked about making you laugh you idiot. Are you retarded?

>You continue to neglect problems in front of you to post on a internet chat board

Never did m8.
>>
>>696488071
Coming at it from the other side here as someone who has only drank twice in their life:

All of my now-former friends are huge into drinking, smoking, partying yada yada. I have my own nerdy interests like anime and manga and I have a blast enjoying them on my own.

It really is good to be alone sometimes.
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>>696487623
It's easy to feel that way. But you're only going to catch what's attracted to your bait.

Fuck people, right now. Set some goals for yourself, and you'll meet women in your career field. You'll find a woman who wants to date you that you met in an office, or in a lab, or wherever you work. Not because she was drunk and you made a shitty joke about breaking bad. But because she saw YOU moving forward in your life and she wanted to ride shotgun. The same with your friends.

You have no reason to listen to me. But your alternative is to keep explaining to yourself and others why you can't win.
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>>696474715
What's that?
>>
I'm quitting the booze after tonight, going cold turkey for a month so I'm not craving it while I'm in this meditation course for 10 days. its called vipassana for anyone interested.
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>>696488071
Yeah, so explore that. Cause guess what? Now you're stoking your own fire. You get to *actually decide* if you are interested in something. And you get to discover that shit like you were a kid, but with an adult wallet and brain.

I always thought I couldn't actually draw or paint. Turns out I was wrong and I get to practice without having my motivation siphoned by booze.

Right now you have to recover emotionally and so does your life. The people you call friends, like scabs, will slowly become less attached, and eventually you won't notice it but they will be gone. That has to happen and it's gonna be slow and depressing. But afterwards you get to realize that they don't even fucking know you. You were just a face in the blur that they call "the weekend."

Fuck em. You make friends with yourself first and then you two will meet people who you like.
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>>696486972
And also I'm 19 so spending 10 grand if not more on that while keeping a roof over my head and food in my stomach was impossible half the time I wouldn't eat because I would rather spend the money on weed and still keep a roof over my head
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>>696488265 >>696488559

Why is is that you two have given me more value than any rehab or AA system has given me? I really am trying to show how appreciative of you two. You have brought me to tears and happiness. There actually is an exit to this hole that I currently am in, and it feels great hearing people that can give me advice to my situation. I want to thank you personally.
>>
Fuck guys, I cant discreet. Have no money but this can't stop me. Fuck that shit, I just can't.
>>
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>>696488791
They are both me, lol. I'm the guy with the bar from earlier in the thread.

I've had a really unique ride through being an addict, having addict parents, one of whom died, and recovering in the most hostile environment imaginable for an addict; a bar where I answer to nobody.

I've had friends and an amazing girlfriend help me through this shit and every day continues to be a tremendously heavy lesson in how to keep living.

You aren't alone. You aren't the only one and you damn sure aren't the worst off. People like us can make it.
>>
>>696489157
Find a hobby bro. It's not worth the small time frame that feels good in your life, and it solely is a result of whether or no your drank or got high
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>>696489237
I haven't found any of that just yet. I'm pursuing pre-law while having a graphic design business on the side and I have no found any of that at 22...Im young and I will continue trying my best.
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>>696484527
Thank you. I've gotten more support out of that paragraph than I have out of anyone in real life and although your just some random stranger on the internet it means more than you think. Thank you
>>
I'm back on meth, was 3 years off it. When I got dumped I didn't see any reason not to. It's getting bleak but I'd rather have nothing and be miserable than be a thief or scoundrel. I'm gonna get a job just to smoke a fuckton on the reg but hopefully I'll get caught in a crisis or die to avoid the years of walking corpse. I hate everyone I have to deal with because of it, but im at the mercy of these little callow people. Where can I find a recipe?
>>
>>696489576
any tips for dropping friends? they are highschool friends so it shouldnt be as hard but it is still hard for me
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>>696489895
If you are trying to return to that childlike wonder or that wonder that you had while during a relationship why go back to a substance or false feeling that never wants you to return to those genuine feelings that were once YOU feeling YOU?!
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>>696489364
Please do. I don't know you, and I'll likely never meet you, but I'll remember you. Don't let me down.
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>>696490012
Ugh, you are kind and wise. I do want to pull myself out and be high on the accomplishment. Doing the world's work for it and smoking the hope from my head.
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>>696489914
Not really you just have to do it. A few people I just flat out stopped talking to and ignore all there calls and the rest I told I stopped smoking and can't be around it and they just said there not gonna stop and it's all they really do so they chose the weed over me and told me without directly saying it
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Opifag here. Havent touched a real opiate since late march. Been on bupe maintence since . Tapered from 8mg to 2mg.. I dont feel too bad but all in all im scared to jump off all together.

Advice?
>>
>>696490210
Smoking the hope from your head...it's hard but worth it...you are currently in a state of constant bewilderment, misleading and constant bullshit...what if I told you the world can be yours, the world or personal bubble that you imagine in your pipe filled dreams, well you know what? IT CAN...If you want it. Drugs are the easy part, drugs make you feel like you accomplished everything, like it is all okay..like you are the god of your universe...well you know what? You are star matter....you are next to worth it..get on your fucking saddle and saddle up...you can pander to the lowest denominator of yourself and be a pussy who depends on substances to change his psyche and world around him. Or, you can take life by the balls, and begin to enact changes that change your world that you see now into the one that you see in your mind....
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>>696490425
Just showing how pathetic the friendship was at first? MAn I hate highschool, forcing us into bullshit at a very young age man. Now, we're here having to sort out the details...Oh well. I'd rather know about it than falling for it.
>>
For anyone who's interested the song "wake up- madchild" made me realize my problem and is worth the listen
>>
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clean on heroin since 1/20/14 recently passed 2.5 years. for the first year didnt drink and also stopped smoking pot but i was on suboxone. Now i have 1-3 beers every month or two and smoke weed slightly more often. Best advice I can think of is make friends with other sober people and completely cut out anyone who will make you slip up because it will happen.

tl;dr
got off heroin 2.5 years ago.
I can answer questions or give advice. not perfect but i have experience and know anything can help
>>
>>696490426
Is anything that you are scared of worth it? Sobriety? Talking to a girl? Pursuing a passion? It will be hard, but nothing worth doing is hard..just realize how rare you are in regards to galaxies and planets...you are a conscious sentient being on a fucking planet talking to others from states or countries away from you discussing your problems...is that really worth taking a simple pill that has been invented by other humans ( starmatter ) DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO IN YOUR LIFETIME.......
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>>696484111
check them trips.

didn't i read something awefully similar to your story on vice or some shit?
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>>696490821
It's a slippery slope, is the next month going to turn into Now i have 4-5 beers every month or two and smoke weed slightly even more often? Your judgement man...I know when there is smoke there is fire, if you think your problem is becoming bigger ask for help or use online resources to find solutions.
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>>696490571
You're right. I need to remain faithful to psychedelics. I don't want to sound as narcissistic as I actually am, but it would seriously only take like a year work to turn me into fucking Thor. I'm in some Nietzsche depths with a head full of Rush songs but it comes down to that I am going to die the pathetic pile I knew I'd become out of indecision
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>>696490571
Thankyou, by the way.
>>
>>696474715
I have a porn addiction, Ikeep browsing b and r9k because I think I'm missing something
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>>696490822
I want to be completely off any substance. I really do want all those emotions back. Bupe makes everything just meh, I dont feel any emotions really. I do have a career path as a boilermaker/welder so I got that going for me at least. My hobbies are mainly video games and guitar. I guess I kind of am shy around girls idk tho I want to get myself right, and also not really up for getting feelings for some girl that could end up crazy.

However I plan to get my dose to the point where I take .5 daily, and once my body adjusts Ill skip a day etc etc to try and make it as painless as possible. My sub doc better prescribe me some benzos and clonidine tho when I jump off.
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>>696491054
The difference between me and you, is that I understand how hard it is...I've been where you are and I undestand how vehemently opposed to anyone trying to make you understand how your weekendly wins off your favorite drug are actually infact just fake uppers or downers that further make your problems worse...don't believe me? I don't care. You'll still be a drug addicted shit poster on 4chan, and I'll be back out of my heart giving advice to bring people out of the clutches of addiction. I meant this for a more counter but I figured it'd work for you :0
>>
>>696474715
Can't drop the drugs
>dad has shitty casee of ALS
>is getting feeding tube and put in a wheelchair tomorrow
>me and wife just got married in january
>we've been having issues
>go to visit dad today
>in tears and says he wants to be a grandfather before he dies
O shit
Fuck
>also says he wants me to stay off everything at least until he passes
>I'm only 18 and so is wife
>so tonight I'm on 60 mg of hydro
>me and wife are going to smoke the last bit of our weed (about an 8th left )
>then end the night with 2 Xanax each
>tomorrow starts baby making season
I feel horrible but my dad never fucking cries at all this motherfucker still drives to his appointments and will still try to walk without his cane or braces
>>
>>696491294
Stop thinking about your life and where it's headed if your doc. prescribes something or not.. thats fear. What do you want from your life? Stop blaming others and taking a pill to make it feel alright when in reality its just a shortcut...be on your deathbed and be genuinely happy you lived a life worth living...
>>
>>696491413
Would your dad want you to use drugs with your wife and not confront the fear or problem in front of you? Live your life how your dad didn't...if heaven is foreal, he'd be proud.
>>
>>696490886
I don't know, but I've told it on various places. I haven't heard anything like it but I can't be that unique.
>>
>>696491413
At the same time life is so fucking dull without substance I've been dabbling in anything that comes around you name it meth coke opiates Salvia just about anything out there besides RC's and haven't done too many hallucinogens outside of shrooms and a very mild San pedro experience and tweaking binge hallucinations
>>
Been sniffing coke for the last 6-8 months. What started out socially is now becoming routine and I know I need to stop as its now affecting my finances.

I also can't get my dick hard when coked up and had an embarrassing situation recently, which tbh hurts more than having no money left.
>>
>>696486426
You're full of shit, no one listen to this cunt.
>>
>>696491525
Youre damn right thats fear. I have every right to fear dope sickness. It is the scariest shit ever. Even getting on subs was hard man having to go to the clinic in full WD, off of fentanyl no less. Crying/screaming/puking driving 30min to get there.. ill never forget that day. Fear is the only thing holding me back from getting off suboxone. I almost gaurentee others feel the same and I can understand how people take bupe for years before trying to stop. But I know I cant let myself do that.
>>
>>696491661
The logical solution : STOP. I undestand it's hard hearing that from someone else. But I can see in your near future what this abuse might cause you...do you want completely and utter bullshit surrounding you day to day, ranging from paying your baby mama or drug addiction? Find the life you want without drugs..
>>
>>696491294
Don't post leather pants, that shit is my weakness.
>>
>>696491614
I haven't figured out underlying issues why I do them I figure there was issues at first now it's become just a life is dull and boring outside of substance but seeing him cry really hit my soul so going out with a bang and then going to hit sprouts aND go all organic no soda and shit exercise hit the gym and try to fulfill my dad's last wishes I know it's going to be shitty as fuck and there's goING to be those fuck it days and wife is completely on board too so that helps I mean if she wasn't she would get the boot because my dad didn't even get to retire he's only 39 and probably won't live another year
>>
>>696474715
GIVE ME THOSE FUCKING OC's NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

I'M GONNA OD TONIGHT DONT GIVE A FUCK
>>
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>>696492097
Why not anon?
>>
>>696491413
I understand the actual dependency weed creates , but it's not something you have to feel too bad about man. If you go two to three to four days in-between joints it's so fucking nice to get stoned again. And your wife can get all kinds of thc in her, the baby might be less competitive but it'll be happy and easygoing:3

I'm real sorry about yer Pa, man.


Guitar welder you sound like you're on a real good fucking track, man.


Getting high used to be fun. Used to be chill, why is that diminishing so fast?

I fantasize about getting a huge sack of dope ($200 or so) and smoking it all with a hooker, or in a frosty forest somewhere far away from home and other folk. Just making sure it's enough to pop my heart somewhere pleasant; or fucking a big fake tit blonde. Damn. Is that common and/or eeally improbable ?
>>
clean for about two years now. feels good.
>>
>>696492183
Cause I don't want to wank, its late.
>>
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>>696491969
Oh my god man, you are so unique, dope sickness, man you are so unique. I didn't use you're heroin jargon and I'm sorry for that. My mind has reverted to a fearless, non addicted, pussified vision that has been coerced into believing it self by drugs.

Listen, only YOU know the solution to your problem, people can help and propel you to the solution, but the only one that can actually start doing the problems and finding the solution is YOU.
>>
You know you think you got that shit under control but if I’m doing it every day how could I be having shit under control? You gotta be happy with life as it is; with your mind clear, you know? It’s kind of crazy because even when I think about like myself in the future I think yeah I’ll have like a little secret room in my house and I can go escape for the night and get stoned. It’s kind of fucked up I guess. It’s like I’m incorporating getting high into my future. That’s probably not the best look
>>
I can say I'm addicted to weed , but I'm too poor so I can only afford about 250$ worth monthly. I'm also addicted to victimize myself and always blame others for my foolish behavior or choices. But I'm pretty ok cuz I'm not a neet.
>>
>>696492104
Okay? If that doesn't sound appealing why curl up in a ball and let it happen? Make things that you want come to fruition. It's very, very hard and I'm on a path like yours but I don't feel the need to be a pussy to others around me and have them verified before I VERIFY MYSELF for its self worth. IF YOU AREN'T GETTING WHAT YOU WANT OUT OF YOUR LIFE. STOP DOING THE SAME SHIT THAT'S CAUSING IT. CHANGE CAUSES CHANGE....
>>
>>696492074
>find the life you want without drugs

thanks man il think that one over
>>
>>696492276
Lol if you dont understand then fuckoff man.
>>
>>696492296
And you've come to a conclusion where it's not normal...so you gonna let it continue or find a solution? Either way the earth doesn't give a fuck about you, so why put any value into to either?
>>
I'm... I'm addicted to memes... :(
>>
>>696492462
The earth doesn't give a fuck about you or that response..just know that there is a life without drugs and your constant hatred of everything around you. I hope you find help man, drunks dont have to be the end all , be all. Women are great BTW
>>
>>696492204
It's not even weed that's the issue it's just being fucked up to enjoy life that's going to be fucking hard
>also married a chick that will snort a line of coke off my dick
Best shit ever was me being doped on opiates while she was on some molly
>that full throbbing dope dick
>told her she couldn't make me cum it's impossible on ops
>that bitch rode my cock from sundown to sun up

This is the shit I will miss for sure
>>
>>696492074
Kill the dragon before it kills you, If you think you might be addicted to cocaine, please get help. Even if it is just a friend you trust who can watch over you for a few days and make sure you're okay. I quit heroin alone on someone's couch with nothing and nobody to help me. I cannot even begin to tell you how that feels.
>>
>>696492747 meant to
>>696492462
>>
I'm a horrible alchoholic. I hate my fucking life and I hope it kills me soon.
>>
My poor freind has an addiction to cup cakes this is her reaction if she cant find hers

https://youtu.be/6FSODPGmznk
>>
>>696492462
so i have to understand your dope sickness to help you? get the fuck over yourself, if someone hasn't shot up your cocktail of benzos or black tar heroin doesnt mean their advice is any more potent to solving your problem. Get over yourself, you arent godly..you are actually a speck of starmatter on a planet that is having TRUMP AND CLINTON FACE OFF FOR PRESIDENT FOR THE MOST POWERFUL COUNTRY IN THE WORLD. YOU ARENT IMPORTANT. You're on the side that could care less about other humans dying or living.. I'm here trying to help humans that see dying as a solution...to let them know continuing on without a SUBSTANCE abuse probelm is a existence worth living.
>>
>>696475829
I still have to remind myself that cops are not a problem. Not using, not carrying. Have not done so in years. Have a good day officer. Feels weird but I can just relax.
>>
Just tried meth, disappointed honestly.
>>
>>696492942
I don't see the comedic value in your post even if it is in an addiction thread..if you could tell me I would be forever grateful, thanks!
>>
>>696493080
Tik is kak my freind
>>
>>696493080
Try hotrailing it
>thank me later
>>
>>696493090
Addiction isnt real its just weak minded idiots with no control over their own minds im mocking you
>>
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>>696493010
Yup, fuck the agenda against cops...constantly vilified while holding the hardest job in the world against DINDU's who wont get the fact that being passive and listening to officers orders will keep you alive..
>>
>>696474715

Meh. It's a personality thing.

I keep my tolerance low, indulge 2 or 3 days and take a break a few weeks.

If you take drugs everyday, you're fucked.

I stuck with my promise to never snort or shoot, it has worked out. I can get a nod from 15mg oxycodone. You junkies ruin it for the rest of us who have control and for those who need it for legitimate pain relief.
>>
>>696493270
What's your point? You're more alpha than me? You have more money than me? You can control your mind? What's wrong with helping people that can't? Are they less of a human than you?
>>
>>696493275
What about the one who was chading a disabled man when police took the guys truck for a gun and then shot his care taker who was laying on the ground with his hands in the air calmly explaining the situation?
>>
I injected 3 whole marijuanas earlier today
It was a fucking rush like you wouldnt belive.
I felt like I could run forever
Which I would have done if I didn't keep bumping shit with my throbbing viagra cock
10/10 would butplug marijuanas
>>
>>696493439
My point is stop whining practice meditation and learn top drop any "addiction" in mere seconds
>>
>>696493270
Kek our addiction are just different than yours
Make sure you get your coffee on the way out to mcdonalds in the morning to get your mcgriddle like you do every morning and if you're late and miss those you get really cranky and bitchy or hey make sure you get your soda from quick trip or make sure you get your porn time in before mommy and daddy get home because you gotta do it or you might be an angry boy all night
>everyone has addiction mine just is more involved
>>
>>696493664
12 year old sitting on his richfag computer in his richfag house all given by his jewish parents - The Post
>>
I'm on methadone, about to turn 21.

I was weekend warrioring roxi 30's, then I only started looking forward to the weekend. Then I bought then on a weekday here and there. Then I bought them everyday. Then I moved to whatever opiates I could get my hands on, opanas, heroin, dillys, poppy seed tea, anything.

No one knows.
No one.
>>
>>696493664
You're addiction could range from drinking starbucks to looking at tranny porn. It's all relevant man. This just happens to have more people.
>>
>>696493449
You can't even type your argument correctly, why would I believe you'd give me your opinion and argument correctly?
>>
>>696474715

Are these 30mg adderall?
>>
>>696494037
Don't think you are unique is the first part, the one that rips through your addiction. YOU AREN'T SPECIAL. What you have done has been done by someone else and you should never feel special for continuing degenerate acts. Go ahead and do those pills, rail em, snort em, get that high. What's it going to do? Further turn you away from the problems in front of you? >>696494037
Life wasn't supposed to be easy.
>>
Stopped smoking weed about four months ago. Not because of addiction, but because i couldn't get a job without doing so.

While smoking was fun, i mostly used it as medication for my severe depression and anxiety. After stopping I'm battling fucking awful body pain from the anxiety and depression and all day every day i just want to kill myself. Which ironically makes it impossible to land a job because people pick up on that shit no matter how hard you try to hide it. Which increases anxiety and depression, which you then can't medicate for (literally nothing else works for me), which makes it impossible to find a job.... fucking never ending cycle of bullshit.

Fuck prohibition. That shit does not work anyways.

Somebody give me some fucking shrooms so i can get a fresh perspective, fuck.
>>
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QQDBOWbKvWg
>>
Stoned 8 years 26 now. Try to get my shit together now.
>>
>>696493865
Have not been to mcdonalds in years cause the food sucks dont drink coffee anx i could be looking at pprn right now but i dont feel like it

>>696493966
No 29 year old sitting in his appartment on his android phone all bought with his dead end job

>>696494121
Because we all make typos i just dont bother looking at or correcting yhem
>>
>>696494278
Nope, but I did this to myself.
I was not happy with who I was.

Opiates made me forget about life for a few hours and just be genuinely happy.
>>
thirty-six hours sober
day dreaming about a bottle to get me through the day
>>
>>696494662
Seriously try meditation
>>
I relapsed nearly two years ago and just subbing a subby now, have 6mg a day.
Managed three yeaers clean, two of those in rehab. 666 days in rehab man.
>>
>>696494777
>two years in rehab
are you a richfag
>>
>>696494485
God dam those were just examples you fucking faggot holy shit
Natural selection is the first thing I think of when I see your fucking responses
You must be a perfect god in the flesh with absolutely no addiction whatsoever
Do us all a favor and just fucking drink the bleach already
I heard it helps with your meditation
>>
been addicted to using drugs in general , of which a year really badly. Recovered on my own, but now facing social anxiety, mild depression, and psychosis.And probably a bunch of other crap, but I realized that all the medicine and psychiatrist appointments where making it worse.
I have been clean for over 3 months now, but I really hope I'll start feeling (a lot) better over time..
I sold shit, so I was always able to take it whenever I wanted, and it got out of hand big time. shit I used;
Cocaine, ketamine, mdma, speed, GHB, nitrous, weed, 4fmp, 2cb.. and stuff which I took, but was not really addicted to: Xanax, alcohol, weed, LSD
>>
>>696492985
Get out of here you fucking 14 year old.
>>
>>696494728
Seriously kys
>>
>>696474715
>smoked weed every day for 2 years
>stopped 3 days ago
>constipation, extreme sweating and headaches

Who here /fell for the "weed isn't addictive" meme/?
>>
>>696494902
Nah, got a years funding at £26k and after 18 months i was working and paying rent to them. I didnt like anyone to move out with and to complete the programme you had to move out with peers.
>>
>>696495143
weed itself isn't addictive
>>
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>>696493270
>he thinks free will is real
>>
>>696494618
Ok so you have never found who you were.. why not experience things and find what you like regardless of substance abuse?
>>
>>696495235
you're confusing addiction with chemical dependance
>>
weed is a nigger drug, yes I went there.
>>
>>696495143
I agree somewhat, its probably so e underlying anxiety. I get it like fuck but dont k now why aside of drugs
>>
>>696495143
Take asrpin and laxitives the sweating you can ignore
>>
>>696495270
if someone "thinks" its real, doesn't that make it real for that person?
>>
>>696495270
The guy who posted that was retarded and probably high of one of drugs that he continually wastes money on regardless of his bank acoucnt
>>
>>696494972
what kind of psychosis?
>>
>>696495503
Same could be said with addiction, so why are constant haters saying it's not?
>>
>>696495306
I'm trying to these days, I finally have a good job, I'm not broke all the time and I'm actually planning on buying a house soon.

I would really like a relationship but I'm worried about telling a girl about my problems and her abandoning me. Part of me feels like if I could find the right person to give me that push, I could do it.
>>
>>696495235
You get physical and psychological withdrawals. This is the definition of addictive. As the other guy said, I think you're confusing it with chemical dependance.

>>696495359
Yeah, probably is. That's why I started in the first place.

>>696495363
I literally have no money until friday. Just gotta stick through it I guess.
>>
>>696495143
Why do people insist that weed isn't "addictive"? I've sold it for more than 5 years. I've known people who spent the biggest part of their paycheck (almost all) at weed the moment they receive it. I've known people who prefered weed over eating and 3 of my friends went to a rehab just for weed. Smoking in moderation is OK, but the problem are the people who start smoking 'erryday from a young age. Weed induced apathy isn't a joke. There's no need for a 15y/old to smoke before school, during lunch and after school and be stoned for the biggest part of the day.lso, apathy induced by weed is not cool. You cant just numb bad feelings. You numb them all, especially over time as a regular smoker. When I take a break, the bad times feel a bit worse, more emotional... but the good also feels better...with stronger emotions. I get an ecstatic lively feeling when something good happened and I am not stoned. These feelings remind me that I am alive and human which is another reason substances shouldn't be praised so highly, like extremists in a cult.
TL;DR weed is okay in moderation, but it's still a drug and shouldn't be used excessively
>>
>>696488265
That hits the spot anon.

Thank you.
>>
>>696495557
Well its quite retarded, i.e. while sleeping over at my friend I experienced him trying to rape me, I was unable to react, move, or do anything.. but I really felt, and experienced it all.. if I had something to hurt him with at that time i would've probably killed him.
Though after which felt like an hour or so I was able to move, and the hand I felt on my leg wasn't even there.. weird huh
>>
>>696495834
that's sleep paralysis. Not psychosis
>>
>>696495834
This was while I was on drugs, and was sleeping next to him. (he only has 1 big bed)
>>
>>696495989
that's sleep paralysis bro. Happens more often to people when they use drugs. There seems to be a link between MDMA and sleep paralysis. Even a couple of days after MDMA, the chance of sleep paralysis is much higher. The hallucination is super real, frightening but you just can't fucking move. It happened to alot of people I know (druggies)
>>
>>696495747
I agree wholeheartedly. I starting smoking heavily at 15, and it is by far my biggest regret in life. I've spend more than half my paycheck as you say on that shit for the last 4 years. Just thinking about how much money that is, man.. Fuck.

I really, really wish that I could do it in moderation, but I know the second I touch that shit I fall back in.
>>
>>696495958
I've had sleep paralysis, but this was way different. The psychiatrist even stated that I had suffered trauma from it back then. Even now I still don't trust my friend, like.. I can tell myself it didn't happen out of logic, but I literally felt him doing.. stuff.. My entire body was shaking throughout the experience, kicking my legs, etc.. but still it kept on going
>>
>>696495834
Fuck mamba/spice
>>
>>696496192
maybe he really did do something, idk, I kinda confronted him about it, and we haven't really talked since then.. lel
>>
>>696496192
kek sounds like what used to happen to me when i was smoking pot
i mean that was a decade ago and my memory is fuzzy but yeah
>>
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Nothing I can think of

In a state of bi polar hell I snorted heroin for about five days, then quit cold turkey.

The hand cramps, fever and back pain from withdrawal were so bad I've not touched anything that strong since nor will I ever

I can't imagine what long term withdrawal must FEEL like let alone going through it
>>
>>696496470
>bi polar hell
heh u ever just wanna like force a manic episode on yourself just to feel that great again?
>>
>>696496192
I'm really sure it's sleep paralysis man. Everthing you say is spot on. The hallucination of touch also happens when you experience sleep paralysis. The fact that you've experienced sleep paralysis before means that you'll probably have it again (and had it again). Do yourself a favor and look up lots of stories of sleep paralysis. You'll be amazed how much your story represents one. My friend is still traumatised by one, said he felt a hand tightening his grip around his neck. Says it's SUPER freaky
>>
>>696495655
That person is you..fear can be overcome...its yourself that has to overcome that.
>>
>>696496614
>I'm really sure it's sleep paralysis man.
He hasn't mentioned a thing about being asleep though.
>>
>>696496680
he said he was sleeping in the same bed with his friend
>Though after which felt like an hour or so I was able to move, and the hand I felt on my leg wasn't even there.. weird huh

dead giveaway it's sleep paralysis
>>
>>696496594

I'm on wellbutrin now and feel pretty great most of the time

Nothing really compares to how I felt when I met my wife though, I was clearly on the up swing and that chemical burst that you get when youre in love was better than anything Id ever felt, still feel it

All though had I been on wellbutrin, I wonder how it would've felt

If I could just have the Ups without the bad decision making, the headaches and insomnia and no Downs, you bet man
>>
>>696496642
Youre right. I'm just weak right now.
I don't want to be like this for the rest of my life.
>>
>>696496915
>on the up swing and that chemical burst that you get when youre in love
people talk about how drugs ruin you for life because of how amazing they feel. they never experienced what you just described though. fucking amazing shit, man, right on. i hope you can stay balanced though.
>>
>>696496853
>he said he was sleeping
he said he was sleeping over at a friends
this might be a cultural thing
>>
>>696497058

appreciate it, brother

its one of those things that you cant really describe, euphoria from any source means different things to everyone
>>
>>696487540
>>696487540
underrated>>696487540
>>
>>696497011
I believe in you, I hope you can do this. I hope you can realize how awesome you are and how capable you are of doing this.
>>
>>696478576
The point of no return is implying that you can manage it in any way. Do what anon said. Go to a meeting, because the first step to solving a problem is admitting you have one.
>>
>>696474715
Shit. Drinking now at 8am. Done rehab 6 times, hospital about 20 times, my body is totally broken. Stepping in front of a speeding truck is next. At least opiates didnt get me. Dont drink, kids.
>>
>>696474715

I have a severe caffeine addiction. It sounds stupid, I know, but I will literally drink/take caffeine pills until I have a cardiac arrest. It has happened once.

My usual drink was two five hours, redbull, and an energy pill as a chaser.

The fact that the shit is available everywhere and no one took me seriously wasn't helping. I would break down and cry a lot. Finally tried to put my foot down. The headache and the fatigue lasted 2 weeks and 3 days straight. I was back on the shit in a week, because all it took was "one bad day" where I felt just too damn tired of everything. I've been clean now for a month and a half and it is easily the hardest thing I've ever done.
>>
>>696498208
alcohol addiction is more brutal than opiates if you ask me. At least opiate addicts can actually function and heroin is affordable for anyone who can hold down a job.

Alcohol addiction will just straight up destroy your body and you can even die going cold turkey from the withdrawals...
>>
Question [for any qualified anons that care to answer and/or provide insight]

Do you consider yourself (or someone you may know) "clean" and "sober" when the only thing used is methadone in a treatment clinic?

Thanks in advance for any replies!
>>
>>696498749
No, im on subutex and consider myself a smack head still. You're clean when off everything imo
>>
>>696498749
No you are only clean when you no longer use at all
>>
>>696477468
Drugs don't suck. You just can't handle them. Stop making excuses for your lack of self control.
>>
>>696483509
This guy is the asshole of the year.
>>
You ever wonder if some people feel like I feel when I get high but they don't have to get high they just have that feeling
>>
>>696497915
Thank you anon.

>>696498749
No as someone on methadone, I am the furthest thing from sober.
>>
>>696498749
Methadone is a medication. I take it in front of a nurse everyday. Is more clean then stuffing a rig into my arm every 4 hours
>>
ITT you were way cooler when you were using.
>>
>>696499923
Definitely cleaner. You're still not sober, though
>>
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>>696475063
It breaks my heart to hear that, but dont decide the past couple of weeks is "starting again". Its a war, you know you can win it, don't let a single battle cost you the war you ARE WINNING! (yes, 'are'! you are still very much in the game right now!)
You know how they call guys who have fucked the same girl "Weener Cousins"? this Addiction...this "Man's Ruin"...shes a super cunt. a wicked disgusting bitch. and she fucked you. shes fucking me. For what its worth, im happy to consider you my weener cousin and i hope you can put that bottle down, man. i really truky genuinely pray you find your strength again. I'll be thinking about you.
>>
>>696500432
Wow, you are a fucking retarded dip shit.
These meeting attending fruits are all the same. You're going to think about this random person that you have zero frame of reference for? What a hero
>>
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Anyone here kick a coffee addiction before? I am 25 and trying to constantly be working so I can be successful early in life. Coffee makes me 5 times more motivated, so I'm pretty cavalier about drinking several cups a day. Still I try to have days or even stretches of days where I don't drink any, and on those days I get nasty headaches. As I understand it, it's a pretty easy addiction to kick, correct? You just get past those initial headaches for a couple of days, then you don't get them any more. Still I worry that I won't have as much energy without it. I remember having way more energy when I was younger.
>>
trying to quit benzos while having a fuckload of neurological health problems. holy hell this is hard.
>>
>>696498155
i appreciate your advice. it's just that i've been able to get out of it before it really fucked my life up in the past, so i think i'll be able to do it again
>>
>>696474715
I've been daily high on a cheap rc for two weeks.
What is the best way to start using less? Quitting it fully seems wrong to me. also high rn
>>
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>>696488265
Well said, friendo. Di
>>
>>696483509
Are you me? Been smoking since I was 14, but started selling at 15 and always had a steady supply of weed and income. All of my money still went straight to weed, even when dealing. The last 2 years I've easily smoked 2-3 or more grams a day, my tolerance is has no limit. I vape with a volcano, but it takes 3-4 bags vaped rapidly to get high. I don't know who I am if I take weed away, because that's all I ever did when I was young. The only way I can stop, is when I know I will smoke again. I just don't know what to do when sober, as everything is so incredibly boring and unsatisfying. I look pale as fuck, with dark circles around my eyes. I haven't cooked in half a year, most of the times I eat around 1 meal a day, I go to sleep at 4-5 am and get up at 4-5pm. It's obvious I have more problems than just weed, but in some way I feel like it takes me down but keeps me going.
>>
>>696500907
Took me about 6 years to quit benzos. I still dabble every couple months but it takes about 16 to 20mg for me to feel even the slightest buzz so money wise its not worth it. Have take take half a months of script worth in one day no bueno
>>
smoking like 6 joints a day now stopped completely as ive moved, have absolutely no appetite
>>
>>696488265
You have a knack for writing. Do you do any work online? blogging/journalism?
>>
>>696501392
yo dude i'm at your point now, just stop. I know it's fucking boring and shit and everything is so uninteresting, but just begin to work on yourself, you can actually make that enjoyable. Stop smoking weed, and start playing the game of reinventing yourself. Change your entire life, start taking cold showers instead of hot, start going for walks, i like to go for walks where i pretend i'm high, when i'm high and i walk around i just like looking at clouds and thinking how pretty they are, and you don't need to be stoned to do that
>>
>>696501392
>I just don't know what to do when sober, as everything is so incredibly boring and unsatisfying

As opposed to your amazing life now.
>>
>>696500726
try switching to green tea, you'll still get some caffeine and all of the benefits associated drinking green tea, i used coffee to help me with intermittent fasting to stave off hunger, when i started bulking again i cut my coffee intake and experienced the worst headaches of my life, started drinking green tea and it helped a lot.
>>
>>696500907
Bruuuuuv I lost my mind coming off em. I was awake dreaming, handed teo laptops and my htc one cause i thought my housemate was hacking mr through wifi and was going on cp to get me nicked. I even rang police to ckme to my house to watch my cursor moving on the screen haha
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