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Heroes of /b/, get in here faggots

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 238
Thread images: 92

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Heroes of /b/, get in here faggots
>>
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Steel Bagnolia reporting in.

Powers of:
>Limited field of vision
>The ability to optimize the space within any container
>Recycles
>>
>>694823727
lel
>>
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>>694823544
add Abominable Umpire yo.
>>
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>>694823544
Master faggot here to watch your back. I can sense other faggot in miles. Other than us of course. (I'm tired so no new photo)
>>
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Any name suggestions?
>>
>>694823953
Make it yourself fam

http://heros-of-4chan.wikia.com/wiki/Heroes_of_4chan_Wikia
>>
Sweaty Hard To Breathe Man and Skullfuckface ready for war!

That picture is interesting, that mans abilities would be well suited among the rank of the Ostfront.
>>
>>694824065
>http://heros-of-4chan.wikia.com/wiki/Heroes_of_4chan_Wikia
I KNOW NOTHING.
>>
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>>694824065
i don't know how
>>
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Something with an apostrophe.

Also, The Unsinkable Captain Cravat, reporting for duty
>>
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>>694824024
Like Kha'ak
>>
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MEGA FUCKING FIST GUY REPORTING FOR DAMN DUTY
>>
>>694824024
Ayy Lmao-Man
>>
>>694824389
What will it be? Will you join us?
>>
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Cow 0f Chaos stampeding in
>>
>>694824282
>>694824352
>top right
>contribute
>make a page

You're all set comrades!
>>
>>694824631
Whapshanka reporting in
>>
im open to name suggestions
>>
>>694824583
>694824024
im the legit eyylmao-man
>>
>>694824631
In time. Present circumstances prevent the Captain from signing up at the current moment
>>
>>694824839
Crimson Cuntblade
>>
>>694824839
The Facefucker
>>
im havin a wee giggl at the wiki
>>
>>694824839
Fistful of Funk
>>
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The Leathered Tanker reporting in for the Ostfront Guard
>>
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@soviet time watchers
kebab remover wishes to join
>>
>>694825010
that's the point. I fuckin love it
>>
>>694824836
I like those blinds
>>
>>694825145
Welcome comrade, together we shall crush the Nazi scum and smash the religion of peace.
>>
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Behold, as I, Captain Cripple, return, now stronger than before, with sword in hand. Who dare challenge me? Expect no mercy.
>>
>>694824907
Kik me if you ever get the chance.
Cow0fChaos
>>
>>694825356
What's so special about my blinds?
>>
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new page Abominable Umpire
created by Zombierawr64 11 seconds ago
New page: The Abominable Umpire is the hero who defends the american past time no matter the cold
>>
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>>694825437
You are welcome among our ranks any time Cripple

>with sword in hand
lost
>>
Soon I will have the most powerful hero /B/ has ever seen!!! maxo the youngfag or maxo the real estate agent idk witch tho. I will post pic in later thread anons don't have right material here
>>
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i can solder that
>>
This is the cow of chaos. I Godda go. Cya next time, heroes
>>
>>694824836
You know Whapshanka. I'll never forget that first thread. Here's to you.

>>694825145
Amazing comrade! good to have another brother in arms. Shall I put you in our wiki?

http://heros-of-4chan.wikia.com/wiki/The_Soviet_Watchers
>>
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>>694825547
idk I think it's the window itself, the windows in my house are pretty lackluster compared to yours and the blinds really compliment them as well as the rest of your room
>>
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>>694825745
forgot pic!
>>
>>694825747
I say again
tits or gtfo
>>
>>694825745
please do (^:
-kebab remover
>>
the weeb wanker

powers:
katana
autism
magic (via wizard status)
>>
>>694825894
probably a trap
>>
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>>694825906
>powers
>autism
>>
>>694825954
At least we'll know for sure
>>
>>694825954
Then it's even better
>>
>>
*cough* MAN THESE SHEETS ARE WRINKLY
>>
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>>694825635
I am flattered, but I prefer to work alone.
But give me sign when you need a hand.
>>
>>694825844
Thank you
- Whapshanka
>>
>>694826085
that's not really a power, anyone can do that
>>
>>694825904
done comrade.
>>
>>694826281
w...
>>
The Stimulator's abilities/credentials include:

>Boosting your car/truck/utility vehicle
>BDSM parties
>????
>Pain Olympian
>>
May we draw our hero temporarily until we can make pic? I do not have supplies to create mine in full photo right now. I will later (as in a few weeks because I won't be home) though if a wiki editor anon will contact my kik - itsalreadygonetoofar
>>
>>694826594
you're supposed to only use what you have in the room
>>
history:
*graduated top of my class in the US navy seals
*been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Qaeda
*have over 300 confirmed kills

fear me faggots
>>
>>694826371
could you makings page for me, comrade?
-kebab remover
>>
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>>694826679
what if im outside, can i use anything I want?
>>
Dan the Raciat Martian here

On mobile so fucked up the wiki page.

Wut do?
>>
>>694826816
I've heard of this guy. He once killed 9 men with 2 bullets and no gun
>>
>>694826646
Comrade, are you employing a distraction to the dirty scum whilst brave heroes sneak up behind them?
>>
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>>694826950
Racist
>>
>>694826950
wtf is a raciat
>>
>>694826646
a
>>
>>694823544
Anon lad here.
>>
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>>694826159
Of what sheets do you speak?
>>
>>694826835
Here you go comrade!

http://heros-of-4chan.wikia.com/wiki/Kebab_Remover?venotify=created

To edit press the edit button on the top left. If you don't want to put anything that's fine, I might write something. Also updated on The Soviet Watchers page

-STW
>>
>>694827134
o-ok
>>
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>>694827205
Straightener, it is good to know you are still well.
>>
>>694824839
Pew-pew Fuck-you
the sweetest streetfighter
>>
>>694827321
forget u saw that link. im deleting it all now. it wouldnt let me delete straight away.
>>
>>694827205
My sheets! Someone wrinkled my 1500 count sheets I got in Venice last summer. They're irreplaceable and I don't know what I'll do!
>>
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wonder weeb reporting
>>
>>694826816
Captain Copypasta
can replicate endless pasta at will
and fling delicious pesto covered spaghetti at his opponents
>>
>>694823544
General Sexcapades reporting
>>
>>694827838
kek
>>
>>694826679
Well fuck. Sorry first timer here never really seen one of these threads the years I've been on (2 year newfag)
>>
>>694827873
Bobby Box Belt Head
>>
>>694827642
>>694827321
all deleted. wow. that was scary. shouldnt have done that.
>>
>>694827412
"Well" is not the word I would use to describe me.
These wrinkles plague me.
It is assuring to see your crisp, unwavering bag, Steel Bagnolia.
>>
>>694827873
damn the box helmet looks like some medieval shit. looks great
>>
When I made the thread yesterday I had no idea it would explode like this
>>
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>>694827803
Dear God, citizen! I have not dealt with an issue of this magnitude before. This may take some preparation.
>>
>>694828171
heres an upgraded version
>>
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>>694828425
You gave the call Comrade and brave heroes emerged.
>>
>>694828540
is that a padlock on the front? good god
>>
>>694828540
Mr Watsinthebox
villians keep trynig to untie the belt to see whats inside but never succeed
>>
>>694828785
no no no. my name is general sexcapade
>>
>>694828785
>Alternate
add this to his wiki right now
>>
>tfw 3 of them are me

but you will never know which ones
>>
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>>694829015
Dan the Racist Martian here

How can I join a faction
>>
>>694829015
Holy shit, THE Triplicate Tim?
>>
>>694829218
You can join a faction by going to the page of your choice, clicking on the edit button on the top left, and adding yourself to the list of members.

-STW
>>
>>694829218
just claim that you're apart of one (except for Fiber Force and Vitamin C) you shoulds join the KKK
>>
>>694829489
Link to KKK?
>>
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darth autismo reporting in
>>
>>694829218
Just swear allegiance to the one you feel calls to you. Also have it approved by a member

Good night heroes. Never forget why we are here. JUSTICE FOR ALL!
>>
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>>694829903
>>
>>694829489
http://heros-of-4chan.wikia.com/wiki/Kool_Killers_Klub
>>
>>694829709
http://heros-of-4chan.wikia.com/wiki/Kool_Killers_Klub
>>
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>>694829997
Godspeed
>>
>>694824893
U GOT MY APPROVAL
>>
>>694829997
take it easy my friend

-STW
>>
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Name: El Borracho Grasa
Power: Metamorphis. When I drink Mezcal I sprout moth wings that spread a poisonous powder.
Weapons: Hatchet of Justice and the Knife of Judgement
History: Drank a bottle of Mescal with a radioactive worm in it and gained super powers.
Weakness: La Migra
>>
>>694829997
Until the next time we meet on the fields of battle comrade.
-Sweaty Hard To Breathe Man & Skullfuckface
>>
>>694826816
Gorrila warfare?
>>
>>694829015
>tfw I am enough heroes to start a faction just by myself

im starting the "Holy shit I want to fucking die but Im to much of a pussy to kill myself" faction. it has 3 heroes (all me) but you will never know which ones, so be careful accepting new heroes, they might actually be me acting as a double agent for myself
>>
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>>694829997
Farewell, friend.
>>
>>694829997
Godspeed my friend
>>
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>>694830550
pelotudo
>>
Name: maxo the creator
Powers: power to be cyberbullied
>>
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>>694830550
>>
>Become 4chan hero

Wut do now?

-Dan the Racist Martian
>>
>>694831171
sweaty mexican here i lold
>>
>>694830550
El Borracho who was then known as Juan Miguel Sanchez Escobar El Segundo was in line for the head position of a massive underground drug cartel in the north of the country
at the age of eight he was bitten by El Chupacabra during the height of a lightning storm
The sang real of the beast dripped onto some gardening tools and became the legendary hatchet of justice and the knife of judgement
>>
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>>694831248
>>
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>>694831248
We must straighten all of the unjust.
>>
>>694831248
>make a wiki for yourself
>join a faction
>talk shit in the threads
>giggle at the wiki
>???
>>
>>694831077
Hailing from the Cayman Islands
Maxo the Creator aka Captain Urea
can leap two feet at a time while dispensing justice from his two main weapons which fires aged urine and an endless stream of diarrhea
>>
>>694831315
fuck thats a way better backstory.
>>
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OP reporting in

Powers: being a faggot
>>
>>694831587
Thank you so much anon my god this is great I am in tears please make me wiki my phone's shit
>>
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wonder weeb is back with added upgrades. My powers include
>breaking up large crowds with awkward jokes
>stealthy avoiding others
>talking people to death
>heat protection from my cool frog sunnies
>>
>>694831779
wheres the wiki?
ive been making back stories all night but i have no idea what you guys are up to
>>
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>>694826085
>>
>>694831813
the 6 billion dollar weeb
>>
>>694831959
http://heros-of-4chan.wikia.com/wiki/Heroes_of_4chan_Wikia

feel free to contribute
>>
>>694824908
kek
>>
>>694825437
those dildos tho
>>
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>>694826519
You could say that the pain olympics was.. shocking..
>>
▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
P R E S I D E N T
>>
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>>
>>694831813
wonder weeb
originally born female on the planet weebo arrived on earth some time in the 1920s during the height of the great depression where he given a poncho while wandering aimlessly in the streets of harlem
as the country recovered from the financial follies of the decade, weeb was sexually affected by the sudden influx of economic decadence and grew more masculine
the changes to his/her physique only added to its powers
>>
>>694832280
kek
>>
>>694832280
didn't even notice that
>>
▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬
P R E S I D E N T
>>
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Call me Dr. Diarrhea

Power: Can make people have violent diarrhea
>>
>>694831441
Good, brought muh tonfas
>>
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>>694832543
Pic related
>>
>>694832526
kek

The Projectile Dysenterian
>>
I AM GENERAL SEXCAPAES! EMBODIMENT OF LUST! FEAR ME VILLAINS!!!
>>
>>694832526
My sides holy shit
>>
>>694832644
i'd hit it
>>
>>694832659
>Dr Diarrhea
>Holy shit

Cardinal Crapper
>>
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>>694832526
Keked holy shit join us at KKK
>>
▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
P R E S I D E N T
>>
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BolognaMan here

Power to change villains into Bologna and take potato quality pics

Weakness: vegans
>>
>>694831077
>>694831779
got you in there
maxo - you diarhea spewing son of a shit gun
>>
>>694833202
im the real BolognaMan, fuck u
>>
>>694833202
kek
>>
>>694833452
It wasn't on the wiki yet
>>
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Edgemeister here.
>>
Sonor - the trashcanslayer is back!!!!!
>>
I am... The Cracker Jack-off

Powers:
>Mixtape is literal fire - burns enemies and gives you likes
>Can distribute delicious snacks on a whim
>Uses Ununtrium throwing-cards to slice through most things

Weaknesses:
>Weebs get on his nerves and will hunt them relentlessly
>Has to go shopping for snacks (that shit's expensive man)
>Is straight but likes traps so not really
>>
>>694833202
Bologna Man - an Italian from the city of Bologna
systemically reconstitutes his enemies into a fine quality deli meat by taking multiple cloudy images of them in quick succession
his long time arch enemy - Asperger the Asparagus from the underwater city of Atlantis is in constant pursuit to destroy Bologna Man
>>
>>694833990
13/14
>>
Join Ostfront, heroes! No jews allowed!

http://heros-of-4chan.wikia.com/wiki/The_Ostfront_Guards
>>
>>694825747
taBnaMm repp

Powers
>Trap b8
>?
>Degenerare faggot
>>
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>>694826085
>tfw I remember bullying this guy on tumblr

Are you from the U.S.? I'd honestly fuck the shit out of you tbqh lad. Post throwaway email slut.
>>
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MR. TOSTITO REPORTING IN
>>
Guys epic bread with a bitch getting SWATted and livestream coming get in here fags
>>694827610
>>
>>694834347
can confirm epic bread
>>
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Greg reporting in
>>
>>694833749
Edgemeister. Soviet Time Wizard here. Will we ever know your gender, or is that part of the mystery?
>>
>>694833749
Edgemeister from the city of Dresden was horribly maimed and disfigured during the firebombing of the city in the second world war
during the rebuilding of the country in the post war years, she found her place as a grammar nazi and can be found roaming cityscapes around the world correcting passerbys with their improper phrasings and use of verbs
>>
>>694834320
Mr. Tostito

Powers:
>Inhuman strength due to his rippling 6-flab
>Can deafen enemies with royalty free ukulele music
>Expert marksman - can shoot with bag on head

Weaknesses:
>hard to breath in a plastic bag
>Can't survive russian winter due to no shirt.
>gets boners at inappropriate times
>>
>>694833968
epic
>>
>>694834854
Love the backstory and I have been doing some grammar editing on the wiki :3

>>694834687
Take a guess
>>
>>694833764
Sonor - the trashcanslayer was born from a horrible industrial accident at a metal refinery that primarily manufactured trash cans in the city of philadelphia
during the explosion, a trash can was permanently embedded onto his skull and encased his brain in a bioradioactive energy that allows him to see through the trashcan and most metals
>>
>>694823544
im an hero and i hav autism :D
>>
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Not rly a hero.
>>
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How can BolognaMan be of assistants guys
>>
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>>694834926
>royalty free
>>
can imagine one of us in this thread is serious about be being a super hero and will actually go out and try to stop crime.
>>
>>694834637
Greg
a phasar from the planet fiscus is in fact a double agent working with the CIA MIB division
he has taken on the form of an internet user to mask his identity to the world and spends his days without sleep trolling the world wide web for pertinent information that will assist his people during the coming invasion
>>
Anons how do I change the name of my page? I like my nickname better.
>>
Why don't you cunts head over to >>>/soc/?
>>
>>694835906
sup - im n the wiki - what doyou want changed?
>>
>>694836095
because we're making shitty heroes not really socializing any more than other boards on this site
>>
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Squawking jester reporting in.
My only powers are flight and a limitless amount of shit to shoot at my enemies. Also my mom can provide rides in her van
>>
>>694836220
You can make your shitty heroes and not socialize there as well.
>>
>>694836112
I got it covered. I wanted to change mine to captain urea thx though anon
>>
>>694833202
>that fucking picture

Holy shit nigger my sides
>>
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Need a name
>>
just curious. what are the current factions?
>>
>>694836463
Chauffeur Shannon
>>
>>694836590
Vitamin C and Fiber Force r big ones but closed to new members. KKK, soviet watchers and outfront guard are getting big but KKK is getting a tad crowded
>>
>>694836974
Meant for
>>694836556

-BolognaMan
>>
>>694835475
Not rly a hero
an inter dimensional being that escaped from a parallel universe where his people were persecuted is capable of teleporting into enclosed rooms surround by drywall only
although this ability gives him free access to every office space and most homes in the country, his powers can not be felt in wooden areas and cottage country
>>
Well great thread comrades. But justice needs me. Take it easy

-Soviet Time Wizard
>>
Is there a group against weebs and neckbeardedness? The Cracker Jack-off would like to join this group!
>>
>>694837301
Farewell comrade
>>
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Greetings, heroes.
I am in search of a faction that would best suit my interests.
I am a trained warrior coming from a German background. I seek to cleanse this world of it's wrinkled and crooked foils.
Strength: Grandmaster of Clothesironringen.
Weakness: Pretty bad PTSD.
>>
>>694837575
>>694837575
Hm either NANDO lot or Kool Killers Klub

-Dan the Racist Martian
>>
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Goodnight my anons. The internet will sleep safely now that they know that captain urea is watching over us
>>
>>694837880
>German

Probably the ost front guards or try the KKK
>>
>>694836343
Squawking jester
a teenaged delivery boy was brought to new life in New Orleans when his Mardis Gras party equipment van was submerged and was wedged into an electrical transformer relay station in the city during flooding caused by Hurricane Katrina
the 12,0000 megawatts of power affixed beautiful swan feathered wings to his heels that gave him the power of flight
unfortunately for his enemies the surge of electrical power also loosened his bowels to the point of giving him the ability to create projectile diarrhea - a formidable weapon against his foes
>>
>>694838004
well done Cap'n
>>
>>694825747
gr8 b8 m8.
>>
I going to make a new faction. The KKK is getting too big for me.
All those who wish to enter the Knight of the Internet Table may do so
>>
>>694838209
Thank you for forging a backstory for me anon.
>>
Do you guys want to sub to my youtube channel? https://m.youtube.com/user/ThinkingPinkie
>>
>>694839111
Check'd also underage b&
>>
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>>694825437
>MY SIDES
>>
>>694837924
Well I want in the Kool Killers Klub!
>>
>>694839111
Trashbag Trooper the Master of Trips

Shortly after birth he was placed in a trashbag and thrown off a bridge into a trashbarge. This barge took him to 3 mile island where the profuse radiation fused his DNA with the plastic encasing him allowing him to become part trash bag.

Discovered by the government in 2007 after suffocating the mother who abandoned him he became a member of a crack squad of CIA hit men known as Group 42.

After a mission in Guatemela he learned he had a brother who was being tested on by the CIA, so after a daring rescue mission they are now both on the lam from federal officials and complete hit missions to support themselves and avoid capture.

Powers include suffocation, mild stretching, and getting trips at will
>>
>>694832387
Pony pls go
>>
>>694840294
Fine but you have to sub to my youtube channel https://m.youtube.com/user/ThinkingPinkie
>>
>>694839718
Cool u in my nigga

-Dan the Racist Martian
>>
>>694840533
Great. Have some crackers my cracka.
>>
>>694840533
>my nigga
>white
>racist
hmmm
>>
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Nameless hero reporting in, requesting names

Powers
>Can play guitar, music gives strength to nearby heroes and damages bad guys
>Expert on music, can literally name any song ever
>Can't fucking see with this stupid bandana
>Lost one eye fighting a mythical dragon
>>
>>694841235
>picture is upside down
Curses Apple, you won't get away with this
>>
>>694841235
Cycle the minstrel.
>>
>>694841235
Dank bat
>>
>>694841235
>>694841235
The Overturned Overture
>>
>>694841615
Not that guy but damn that's clever
>>
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The Altiplanic NINJAAA
>>
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>>694841615
Woah
>>
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>>694841615
I like it
The Overtuned Overture I shall be!
>tfw no Wikia account
Frick
>>
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>>694842355
Behold my weapon!
>>
Bag Man reporting in. Paper will always reign over plastic!
>>
>>694842732
Bag Man, dare we look in that garbage bin?
>>
>>694842919
WILL THERE BE A PLASTIC BAG IN THERE!?
HIS WORST NIGHTMARE!
>>
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>>694842711
>>694842732
Are those the same guitars just different color?

Literally same exact shape from what I can tell
>>
>>694843240
it is an extremely popular guitar shape, BolognaMan.
>>
>>694843478
Shit my bad

I'm a trumpetfag
>>
>>694843240
BalognaMan has a good eye. It is probably a fender though. It's the most popular design,

-Cracker Jack-off
>>
>>694843240
Same guitar, a stratocaster
>>
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>>694843593
>>694843898
Behold, gents.
As you toot your flutes and trumpets, we pay tribute to our God of Thunder.
>>
>>694844049
Wait my bad
The guitar in the first pic is my strat, I think the second pic is maybe an Ibanez, either way they are both strat shaped

I know the second isn't a fender though, fences have metal plates connecting the neck and the body
>>
>>694844191
Wow straightener, nice guitar. Im a piano, vocal, and electronic guy myself. Check my mixtape.
It's actually really tight yo.

-The Cracker Jack-off
Thread posts: 238
Thread images: 92



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