>>693048912 >>693048986 Hello thanks friends okay I'll try get to the point quickly Basically my ex girlfriend of about a year and I broke up after going to different universities after highschool, but her family lives in my city so whenever she comes back up for her breaks we meet up. I haven't met a single other girl I've liked as much as her so basically I'm still in love with her and have no idea what she will think if I ask her if she wants to be together again, it kills me inside when she goes back away but I'm really worried she wont want to be with me just cause shes half a country away :^( should I just man up and talk to her about it or is there something else I can do? Feel free to ask whatever questions about the situation
>>693049463 Honestly dude, I don't know what to tell you. It sounds like it sucks and I wish I could tell you that there's an easy solution. But honestly, it all depends on what you want man. If you really like this girl and it pains you to see her leave whenever she leaves town then you just gotta be upfront with her man. Cause, not telling her and letting this "cycle" continue, it's gonna tear you down bro.
>>693049979 Forget about her man, if she says she didn't feel the way she used to. Then it's not the fact that you weren't bringing new stuff to the table or anything like that. She lost something, that's typically what lies behind that "excuse"
>>693049852 Thanks man yeah I see what you mean, it is wearing down on me quite a bit. I mean when shes back and were together we almost have the same relationship dynamic that we used to (i.e sex and sleeping holding eachother etc,) do you think because this remains there is a real chance that she will want to try long distance?
>>693049463 Having personally been in a (failed) long distance relationship through university, I'm going to have to give you the same bullshit advice that I read and heard and never listened to and wished I did after realizing I was an idiot for 3 years.
Just grow on your own man. This is the time to go meet other people and go do dumb shit with you and your friends to go and make more friends. Can long distance work? Yeah of course; my best friend and his girlfriend were the kind of couple that sort of got together as a silly high school hook up--now they've been together for more than 4 years. Go figure.
But I think at a certain point you have to offer yourself an ultimatum: talk to her with an open heart and really be prepared to accept that, hey, it's over, or just drop it completely. Simple thing. Not easy, but simple. But as >>693049852 said don't let the cycle continue.
>>693050220 I'm gonna be real with you man, let me be the first to tell you. There's a chance yeah. If that's stuff is happening, there's a surefire feeling down there that still "wants" or "desires" you. Doesn't exactly mean that she's going to want a LD relationship, you know?
But hey man, like I said, you just gotta be straight with her. Especially after one of those "tender" moments, she'll be more receptive to what you have to say.
>>693049979 Well think of it this way: would you want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't love you any more? Sucks, especially after having been together 3 years (been there) but what's the alternative? Trying to make her love you back?
>>693049463 Don't be friends after breaking up. IDC what you think you want, it's a bad idea. You can't hang out with her and her family and reasonably expect to get over her quickly, and you're always gonna wonder. This is gonna eat at you the whole time your friends. You can ask her out if you want, although I personally wouldn't, but if she says no you need to stop being friends. Don't phrase it as an ultimatum though let her answer you as if you just wanted to get back together, and if she says know put space between yourselves
>>693049979 dude i have honestly lurked since 2011, and i only ever reply on these feel threads. shit kills to see other people down all the time over non-sense like this. in times like this its hard to be "hard", but lets face it. she left because she lost feelings, thats not your fault at all. dont get down over this and use it as a chance to grow and get better. find someone else who synergizes with you and dont let this get you down. i swear im preaching this shit but the moment you start kicking yourself in the ass over it, is the moment you've lost. use this to grow and become better.
>>693050386 >>693050547 Thanks so much guys, a lot to think about. I'm with her for 2 days starting tomorrow evening then I won't see her until she's next back in my city so I should probably make up my mind soon about what I do. If i do want to ask her about it, what do you think would be the best way to go about it? I really hope that if I do this, in the case of rejection, we still function the same way together when we do see each other in future. I may add that she greatly helped me battle depression after the passing of my most respected role model, my grandfather, so our connection is extremely significant to me.
>>693051454 hey no problem. to be honest the best thing is to get away from these threads. it'll drag you down. go do something you enjoy, and something you did BY YOURSELF, dont think about that girl. go play WoW or jerk off, idk. just keep a level head and be productive.
I'm at the point where I'm in bed all day and have no desire to get up to do anything. I'm tryna fix my sleep schedule so I can do programming shit 6-8 hours a day and lift weights and gain weight and shit. That's the goal for the summer. But by fucking god I can't do shit. It's not even the first time I've been in this bullshit slump.
I don't even know what I'm saying anymore. I've lurked these threads from time to time, wanting advice or anything really--even the relief of putting stuff into words, and I can't even get that.
Want to sleep, but I'm so tired all the time. Want to lift weights and work out, but I don't even eat enough on a day to day basis (like 1500 calories when I need 2500). Want to do programming shit so I can salvage my, thus far, useless college education, but because I'm so tired all the time can't just fucking sit and do it.
Video games have no appeal. Friends are nice to be with and all but 1) they have their own lives at this point and 2) doesn't change the fact that I can't do shit about all the above shit.
Basically I'm useless and whining about shit that's been figured out but I just refuse to do.
>>693052541 i've found forcing my self into shit has done the trick. for instance i was pretty unathletic like freshman year of highschool so i got into lacrosse. granted i hated the fucking sport, i still forced myself to work out and atleast apply myself. now im relatively healthy and i leave for basic training soon, so i guess it helped.
>>693052035 I could give you all the bullshit about how I "feel complete" with her, but I'm intelligent enough to know that feeling like that is most likely my young naivety coming through. Thanks for the great replies and advice, I think I'll have the balls to ask her out again but I think I will be able to come to terms with things if she doesn't want to try a LDR. I'll probably keep lurking the thread, but I've come for what I really needed and you and whoever else replied have my greatest thanks for giving me all your input. If anyone wants to suggest how I discuss this issue with her that would be much appreciated, cheers guys
>>693051533 Set aside a time to talk, and let her know it's something serious. Try your best to be matter-of-fact about things in the sense that it's best not to make her feel like she's trapped into making a particular decision or answer you a certain way.
I feel like _____ but I accept and understand if you feel like ____
If she responds in a way that's discouraging of a romantic relationship, do your best to prepare yourself for that response--if she doesn't want a romantic relationship, then that's that. You can't have a (happy) relationship where only one person has the romantic feelings. This conversation should be about finding out how she feels and making a decision based on that.
But again, from someone that's been in a LDR, shit's hard, and I'd hate for you to have to go through the agony of that and realize that it wasn't for you in the end. A relationship shouldn't be the only thing in your life. It should be ONE OF the nice things you have going on in your life.
That said, I'm also really good friends with the person I was in a LDR with, despite everything. Obviously every situation's different, but it's possible she can still be in your life even if things don't work out romantically.
>>693054440 not really much to tell >be me, 6, maybe 7 >family was poor so all sleeping in one bed >wake up cuz parents got out of bed >look outside >see dad holding tiny lifeless corpse beside ambulance >she was only 29 days old
>>693052541 Exercise will help you feel less tired and also help with your sleep cycle. Get some protein powder that you can use to add more calories and also fix your diet. You'll feel way better if you're eating decent food and working out
>>693041982 The most feels I got from that pic was realizing that I've seen ids cycle here and gone multiple times. And with this the realization of how much of my life has been spent shitposting and thus wasted
>>693056283 Yeh trying, lifting weights every other day, but I'm figure I should add running in between those days. Already got the protein powder, I gotchu on that. I think I'm mostly just thinking too many steps ahead and getting discouraged when I realize I'm at step 0.6
>>693057179 Thanks my dude, just hard to get over the thought of "hey, if I started doing these small things 4 years ago when I said I would start, I could have been in such a better place" but that's life I guess.
>>693049414 I had an experience similar to this. I used to be friends with this girl who ended up turning into an enormous cunt. She texted me out of the blue one day some mean shit so I drove to the cemetery, took a picture of her recently-deceased mother's headstone and sent it to her with a shitty little comment attached alluding to how fat her mother was in life
Actually, I guess the two stories aren't all that similar
>>693058514 2 years fiancee, new girl I know few days. Kinda amazing all this what is happening. Really. But somethig is missing with fiancee. I guess its mans desire to get girls, to be in game, or I just want to experiment, like that. Had ony one gf before fiancee.
Yes I am fucking piece of bullshit now. And I bet b had something to do with that. But there no turning back now. I ADMIT IT.
>>693059274 Just letting you know that 5 days in comparison to the 730 (ish) you've known your fiance are very very very different things. I think you're over-idealizing whatever you see in this new girl, who you can't even know all that well. Who knows, maybe she's secretly a fucking psycho, but you can't know that yet really
This is my first reply after months of lurking on this site, I'll give it my best shot. >Have this awesome girlfriend named Daphne >She means the world to me, and I feel love for the first time since middle school. >One day, she leaves school, and I call her over and over, no answer. >Arrive at her house 2 hours later, her parents tell me while sobbing that she is in the hospital because she cut an artery on her arm. >Nonono.jpg >Rush to see her, they let me in- she looks terrible, and sobs when she sees me. >I regurgitate some Fault in Our Stars stuff, trying to sound funny but to show her I love her. >She promises to stop cutting, and I cry with her. >Two weeks later, she cut again and died, her parents found her in the tub. >mfw If only I had been more convincing, she might not have done it.
Was waiting for one for a while here goes > Be me > 8th grade > My middle school did this weird thing where they divide everyone into 4 teams and each team has 4 teachers > Almost all my friends get put on other teams > Start making new friends > One is this dude I knew from elementary school named Colton > Get really close to him > Start hanging out >Town has a music festival > Colton, his gf, my friend and I spend almost 2 straight days together. > feelsgood.jpg >Make an assload of other friends on the team > Yearbook signing comes > Colton is the first one to sign it > Freshman year > Colton and I have almost no classes together > Don't talk to him any more > Find different friend groups > Drift apart > Sophomore year Nov. 1st > Some friends me and are playing LOL over skype >at my dad's house alone (parents are divorced) > Mom comes in >know something is up > She is bawling her eyes out > "Anon, Colton is dead" > Died in a car crash cuz his friend floored it and lost control > Immediately tell my friends >This kid was one of the most popular kids in school > We all sit in silence > I go to his funeral > cantspellfuneralwithoutfun.png > Actually the saddest thing I have ever seen > His 13 year old brother has to pry his mom off his corpse > Go home > See 8th grade yearbook > "Anon, you are hilarious and smart, hope we have some classes next year"- Colton Taylor I have to keep that yearbook wrapped under blankets in my closet or I can't sleep at night.
>>693061669 Shit you're young as fuck. I mean compared to the age people get married around where I am anyway; I'm sure the norm is pretty different depending where you live and whatever.
I think at a certain point you have to concede that YOU feeling bad for how SHE feels for something YOU did is super bullshit. Like you're allowed to feel bad and everything--human emotion and whatever--but keep in mind that it's something that's entirely on you. I don't know what your relationship with your fiance is like, but seeing as she's only 20, I can assume the's pretty naive and maybe not the most emotionally mature so I don't know how she'd handle you telling her the truth.
Best I can say is really think about how you feel about your fiance. You're not married yet, so if things end, at least it's not at a point where she feels like she's settled down with you and her future is set.
>>693062164 In my case, boyfriend eventually told his fiancee. I suspect she found out through the grapevine anyway. Not sure of the damage done there. It was also a weird case where he knew me better than he knew her. (She was essentially a mail-order bride.)
He and I cut off almost all communication until after they divorced. It seemed like any time that he and I chatted or were in the same geographical location, she just went off on him. Wasn't pleasant.
He was my first. I was 20. It hurt so fucking bad. Looking back, he and I admit that we would have made very different decisions.
My solutions: 1) cut it off with one or both, say nothing 2) cut it off with one or both, tell both of them 3) come clean and beg for forgiveness and go to therapist as a couple
The fiancee is going to find out sooner or later, anon.
>>693063028 Then postpone the wedding and visit a therapist.
Seriously, one of my biggest regrets before getting married was not going to premarital counseling. It would've given us the opportunity to really talk about what's important to us in a practical way, instead of the "love conquers all" bullshit.
My girlfriend just broke a promise to me. I can't tell if i should move on or try to fix our relationship. She wants to stay together. Can i have words of advice? Also i wont say what the promise was, it doesnt matter anyways
i just want the pain to stop. i left you five years ago. that was longer than we were together. but i knew i made a mistake. i tried to come after you that summer but..you didnt want to make it work again.
im so sorry.
i know my life is punishment for what i did to you.
Hey /b/. Felt like absolute shit today. Here's the story.
>be me >21 kissless virgin >meet low self-esteem fat girl that likes me >friendzone her >2 years later >haven't found a gf >talk to fat girl again out of desperation >try to get friends with benefits situation going >she's currently in a "relationship" with a chick online >tells me that she doesn't really like her and it probably won't get anywhere >start flirting with her in text >she's into it >sends me pics she drew that are sexual in nature >flirting gets sexual >"is this just dirty text anon or are u serious?" >tell her I'm serious and that I find her sexually attractive and that I want to have sex with her >she seems taken aback by this but doesn't seem put off >ask when she wants to hang out again >says not sure cause of school, work, and other stuff >think nothing of it and maybe she just needs time to think >ask how her new job is going >short responses >get nervous >text her a couple days later >responses short but she keeps the convo going >next day >ask what she's doing for Independence Day >one word responses >ask a few times over the course of this to play games online with her (we did that a lot) she either ignores or responds to something else I said instead >I take this as her not being interested in me
Now this is where I truly fuck up (I think). In my head now my safety net has just been taken away. At the very least I knew this one chick liked me and now that I feel it's slipped away it starts to send me into depression
>feel like shit all day today because of this >tired as fuck >out of retardation/desperation I text her >tell her that I had a shitty day cause I've been feeling isolated and that the plans I had with friends fell through (true) >for context she's usually really concerned about my well-being and health >response from her seems very canned and unsympathetic >just decide to stop there and play it off as needing to vent and there was no one to vent to.
Kill me. Why do people have to cheat on me. I give them what they want but they just dont care about me. I guess people use me because im well off making money. Yea i might of bought her a new car or took her to Europe. But then you cheat on me with my best friend. Hes not my friend anymore. I hate you. 3 times this has happened. First time the other dude was my friend. Just fucking kill me. Hit me with a semi. Shoot me. Run me over with a train. As long as im dead ill be happy. Fuck everyone. I want my money burned in a fire. Might as well burn my house down with me in it. Fuck life man. Fuck life
I'm tired, /b/. I've been tired for a while... I'm trying to change, but I have no willpower to. The moment I tell myself "I'll do my best", my energy runs out on the very thought of it. It feels meaningless. It's funny how I'm jealous of how other people live, how I want to be like them, but can't do a thing to change it. It's not that I'm lazy, it's just that everything I've worked myself on before turned out to backfire at me. It's like life doesn't want me to advance.
I cannot feel anymore. Whether it's sadness, happiness, anger, or another, I just don't feel. My life has hardened me. I want them back, my friends. It's hard to live for something when you don't feel anything. What should I do?
>>693050195 Letting go and making up excuses to try to get them back or thinking of what I could have done better is something I'm still fighting with. I still think about my ex all the time, and it's already been 6 months. Said he'd just wanted to be friends. Why do people always do that? I was in love, he didn't feel the same anymore. I couldn't be just friends.
>>693063185 do you have kik or anything like that so we could talk a little? it seems you understand that more than others. Btw. new girl knows that I love fiancee, she says that she will wait because she fell in love etc. and I have really big test ahead, in 2 weeks me and my fiancee are going to live together, never done that before. Can be good or bad.
It's possible. Even in these cases, you must have patience. Also consider certain emotional imbalances. It seems you made a slip. Do not panic under no circumstances, nor lose your composure. Pull yourself together, if you assume that it is worth. Otherwise, pigeons, follow with your life.
>Be me >19 >Go out with girl from Kentucky for a whole year >beautiful, funny, whole 9 >Leave for army BCT >Get my phone back >found out not only did she dump me, she's been dating another guy >oh yea shes pregnant >mfw I thought I was the one >mfw I now realize I was the one
>>693065582 Im in the exact same place. Im gonna try working. I just bought and assembled a dip and pullupbar station and i got a pirated version of p90x. I figure if u gotta live this life u gltta keep tryin until so.ething works. I dont care if u dont succeed till ir 50. Life is the only damned game in ths world so u might as well play it.>>693065582
I hate to post this being in no shape to reply to other anons who have posted in this thread.. I'm drunk, and depressed. Mostly depressed.
My fiance died almost 2 months ago, lung cancer. Haven't been able to sleep normally, quit my job and have been unmotivated to find a new one.. Any money I have goes straight to booze.
I'll kill myself before the new year. I have no family or friends that would care, and there's always that little idea in the back of m mind, the possibility maybe I'll see her again in another life.. But who knows, I'm ending it for my own selfish reasons.
>>693065062 I had 3 women cheat on me and it killed me but i never thought this. Youre beta and a faggot Killing is pathetic. Be a man and find someone else play that whore on. Fuck her and leave and repeat you nigger
>>693049461 Every feels thread man, you never cease to let those words go. Shit soaked life. Stop doing this to yourself anon. Who gives a shit about that one dude who made you feel the need to live those words out man.
How do I apply myself in life? I don't have a girl because I don't care. I don't hold jobs because I don't care. I don't have friends because I don't care about them or their problems. What do? Not really feels related but wanted advice.
>>693070828 I have the same problem. What I've done is become extremely bitter. I care about no one but myself. and I've reached a point where I don't even desire improvement anymore. I think the only escape is death. I will kill myself in two days.
>be me >get put in "gifted class" for children with top 5 % iq in county at 1st through fifth grade >makes me a social retard because with same kids for years >struggle through the rest of my schooling hanging in the back of several groups >get into drugs and alchohol at young age for years >kick that shit barely pass high school >become neet for 2 years until i join the army >4 years in career is good but is still literally all i have >drink heavily every night >contemplate suicide all the time but don't want to do it myself, no real human connections that give a shit
honestly thinking of getting out and going to some 3rd world shithole warzone on my own to fight until I get killed because i'm too much of a pussy to do it myself.
>>693072176 Then stick it out with her, bro. She needs help and if you love her, show her that support. But remember, there is a chance you'll get burned again. It's easier to hear about a ship we love sinking than to stand aboard it while it sinks, know what I'm saying? If it gets too hard to watch, you have to leave before it hurts you.
>>693045020 >>693045881 >>693063883 >>693066262 >25yo kissless virgin here reading these shits is the last thing to do. First, they are false in the way that some girls probably started liking you at first, but you didn't saw it because you see yourself as non desirable. "Chad" banged her a couples of hours after in front of you, but apparently /b/ is obesessed by cucks so some of you maybe enjoy this ? I, just don't care anymore. I'm not attracted to anyone since I gave up 2 years ago. I fap too much but it helps to calm down the urges. Now that I don't try anymore, things get better. Less social anxiety, girls are more receptive. But still don't want. I have nothing against girls but I don't want to play the game. I just wasted the times where you can fuck and love with butterflies without consequences.
>>693041982 i dont know if this is a good place to say this because of assholes and shitheads alike. but i feelt very bad about the way i treated my dad especially today
we had a little argument over something and i called him a fucking idiot, and then i screamed it again when he asked what i said. threatened to kick me out and etc i got angry and punched a tank so i had to get stitches
when we got back home i told him i was sorry, then he said sit down in my room and he talked and started crying saying i never wanted you to leave. you know in my heart i will always love you. he tells me about his dad and how he got beaten by him all the time, and my dad cant read and his father beat him for that too.
when he was telling me how hard he tried to read his whole life he said he even went to jehovahs witnesses to get a little book, and he looked at his hand and just stopped. and then cried. i believe he was looking back at how i called him an idiot and that linked to him not being able to read. i couldnt bare to see him like that so i hugged him and i said ill never disrespect you again, but i feel utterly terrible with myself and i cant hold in my tears when i think about it and how he gave everything up for me and had to work with his hands the whole life doing everything the hard way.
>>693066027 I feel like I'm having the same thing happen to me, where I'm becoming increasingly confused about my sexuality. Personally, in my situation, I think it's because with girls I've only had my heart broken again and again, and I'm subconsciously done with it. I've began to silently and accidentally fantasize about a few of my best guy friends who, a couple years ago, I would never have even thought about cuddling with or kissing.
You really should just hang yourself. You never cheat, ever. EVER. You don't deserve her. All you deserve is pain and loneliness.
If you can't be loyal and keep a fucking promise you made to the one person it matters the most to, you're fucking trash and deserve to be treated like it. Go bury yourself in a fucking landfill, alive.
>>693041982 I don't know what's wrong with me. I've been crying on and off all day and I don't know why, usually I can control my negative emotions but it's just been awful today. I've been off self harm for about a month now, it's been harder than ever to resist. And the worst part is I bailed out on my best friend today, I feel so goddamn terrible about it. He's be there for me for he last six months and I just cancelled last minute... I'm a shitty friend, and a shitty person. I was just scared of him seeing me in such a weak state that has no reasoning.
>>693047426 been there done that. I wouldn't recommend regurgitating or re-digesting those few happy moments, everything else become bland after a while, even those feelings of nostalgia. that's how I moved on. my future became more important than a person that's now product of the past. my objectives are and goals don't include her, she's irrelevant. I learned that from her...and she was right.
Me and my old man were best friends. March 14th 2015 he suffered a TBI. I was halfway across the U.S for work. I rushed home as soon as I could. It turned he also had stage 4 bladder cancer. He'd been hiding it from us. I watched my father a man I worshiped, drank with and always been my best friend become a shell of his former self. He recovered from the TBI but he was never fully recovered like a piece of him was missing. I don't know.
Eventually I left that fall for work again and had to listen through my mother about how he was slowly dying. I didn't even go home for his last birthday/thanksgiving. The fear of watching my idol decay before eyes was too much. We had our last christmas in a rehab facility. I gave him a book on general custer. He loved to read especially biographies.
He passed away Jan 29th at 3:00 am.
I keep trying to finish the book I gave him. I'm at the point where his bookmark is and can't do it.
I stay strong in front of my mother because she is a wreck but god Anon. it's an awful morning for rain.
Christ I miss him. I can't tell you guys the horrible things I would do to have one more day, one more drink to ask everything I wanted to with him.
>>693041982 I've had bad health all my life, and now I think I have a tumor in my tongue. I'm 19. I don't want to die. I don't want to lose my tongue. All I want is to live a normal fucking life. Why is that so much to ask? I don't have any friends, I left all of them when I was 17. My family only tolerates me. I wish I believed in a god so I could have something to look forward to. I've tried before, but it always felt like a delusion.
>>693066522 Same. I'm joining the army as soon as I finish college. That way I'll at least have some kind of purpose and if I get killed I wont be remembered as some lazy fuck who didn't do shit with his life.
>>693074391 Wanna feel better and do something that'll make your dad respect you for life? Teach him how to read, how to write and never let him feel stupid again. Then buy him books for birthdays and christmas. Don't half ass on him though, EVERY night possible you have an hour reading together.
I simply cannot fathom what my future holds, my only goal in life is to be happy but the how is what's always puzzled me. I've learned how to distract myself and be happy in the moment but I'm miserable in the long run.
I find that while it sucks to picture someone you love being physical with someone else, its the other little things that get to me way worse. Or, the things I thought were just little things. Sex is fantastic and all that, but its only one part of a relationship.
For instance, my last girlfriend and I had a little cafe we frequented; went there probably three or four times a week. I went in there a few weeks back and she was there with someone else. She sat across from him the same way she used to sit across me when we were engrossed in conversation; leaning forward over her arms, which were bent at the elbows and leaning on the table, both hands around the cup of whatever she had. Head tilted just a bit while she listened, same old smile that I still remember. Legs crossed at the ankles, underneath her chair, purse on the floor between her and the wall, jacket slung ungainly over the back of the chair.
That little place, it holds a lot of memories that I associate with her. Our first date, first time she met my best friend, first time I met HER best friend, etc, etc. Seeing her there with someone else, it just felt strange; like I had stepped out of a role in a play, while someone else stepped in to take the reins.
I think that's the big thing about that picture; it isn't so much about the intimacy between two people, so much as "can you handle being replaced?" That's a hard thing to handle for a lot of people and now, in my early thirties, I'm learning its hard for me, as well. Nothing to do about it though, just keep doing your thing and keep your head up.
>>693079907 >I want to get a book published. >I want to travel Europe, and Southeast Asia. >I want a circle of friends who don't just tolerate my presence >I want to go to school and study something. Not sure what. >I want to learn how to play the flute, violin, guitar, and a few other instruments >I want to build a house. >I want to love >I want to move somewhere cold and remote with somebody who loves me. Northern Norway maybe. Or Alaska. >I want to learn to ride a horse >I want to have children. Two boys, and a girl. >I want my life to have meant something >I want to die peacefully at an old age surrounded by my family and friends
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