Rolling for weed and my main man Tyrone aka Darnel aka Crab Man.
My name is Earl.
MFW I got comfy boots and a sturdy tarp.
It's life Jim but not as we know it.
i choose comfy boots and pistol
i intend to survive
make mud hut to sleep in
make stone hatchet
start my own small community on the island
kill panthers and skin them to make clothes
Items: Fishing Rod/spear, Sleeping Bag
Set up a camp next to the water with foliage, use spear as a blade go make sharpened sticks, dig a ditch around of 1meter depth and 2 meter depth around the small camp, fill it with sharp sticks and cover it with foliage, use a strong piece of wood as a bride for myself to go in out the camp, go to damp jungle soil and dig up worms to use as bait for fishing, fish for the whole day, keep some as a bait for animals, eat how much I need and rest the rest of a piece of wood in a sunny place to dry it, use sea water as a preserver, sleep in the sleeping back in the camp.
Eat dried fish, take the fishy b8, go into the jungle. Try to search some small animals, such as smaller monkeys/ birds, rats, of possible the tribe members, study the animals patterns and the group numbers, go predator style and use dirt as camo.
>Also food chain doesint realy make sence in this scenario butt fuck it.
If found smaller animal, kill it, gut it, but keep liver/ intestines/ heart, use a big leaf as a tray or a bag if it's big enough. If tribe member found, fallow him back to their camp, if they have sculls and shit around and look ultra caveman, don't alert them, walk back to camp with the kill, dry slowly and make rubbery string with intestines, use a bendy stick to make a bow, use wooden thin sticks to sharpen to make bow and arrows.
Cook and eat liver.
Skin the animals, using spear as a skinning tool.
Use hide and and intestines, with spear to make holes, make a backpack, quiver, and if possible gloves.
Sleeping in bag again.
>Repeat the last day but on a smaller and quicker scale because I know where the animals are, steal if possible items off the tribe members while they are not looking.
Use fiber from plants to make thicker ropes and strings.
Use Bow+ arrows in a quicker to hunt birds and smaller prey. With feathers improve arrows to fly further and straighter, use hide to make hide boots, shirt/tank top.
YFW Panthas, Gorillas and Bears have a relatively short drop onto a few twigs witch in turn ensure even the Panthas can get out with relative ease.
Your camp is raided.
You spend your 1st night on the island learning what Umbongo feels like.
Porn and a machete, huh. Well, the good news is that I can carve myself a wooden fleshlight.
On a more serious note, the machete allows me to do a lot of woodworking, and a paper porn mag might be good tinder for a fire. If I find flint to bang against my steel machete, I have fire within hours of waking up.
With fire at my command, I can start a forest fire to burn a considerable chunk of the forest between me and the lake. And if I'm lucky, some of the animals will die in the fire.
All in all, things are not looking hopeless.
I still have the porn magazine. I can tell the gods gave it to me as I am their messenger.
The page I used for tinder contained the meaning of life, but unfortunately that was devoured by the snake god as I fought him in the heavens.
I lost and crashed on this island on my chariot of fire. The chariot also caused the forest fire.
>pic related: is holy text
get rekt /b/itches. I can eat panther tonight while i'm wearing my gorilla pelt and my bear tooth necklace while I'm fuckin all the bitches from the tribe since their inferior males died from lack of killing power.
Rollin again because I'm a boss.