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b, how can I get a girlfriend ?

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 85
Thread images: 8

b,
how can I get a girlfriend ?
>>
>>685354081
By not trying.
>>
>>685354081
Get off /b/, get /fit/, and just try to chill out more.
Also, don't be afraid to make it obvious what you want from them without asking or begging them for it.
>>
Getting a girlfriend is not the same as getting a bike or something else, you earn the privilege to date someone, then you work at keeping them. First thing you do is smile a lot and try to be happy even when you have nothing to be happy about. Carry your self with confidence even if you don't have any. Compliment the girls on what their wearing and doing even if you don't mean it. And most important, brush your teeth and have a fresh breath, nothing worse than a nice person whose breath smells like shit.
>>
>>685354081
get off 4chan on a Friday night and go hang out with your friends (who hopefully include women)
>>
>>685354081
it's easy:

step 1: get a girlfriend
step 2: you're done
>>
>>685354081
Stop being a lousy cunt and get a life. The fact of the matter is, as long as you're desperate you won't get shit. Get your own apartment and a job, then chicks are easy.
>>
Stop watching porn and get out more
>>
>>685355598
why?
>>
>you
>girlfriend
pick one
>>
>>685354081

Don't know mate, got the same problem. 20 years old, kissless virgin.
A couple of days ago I was hanging out with a friend of mine in my room, playing videogames and stuff. I asked her for a handjob, she slapped me and raged out. What did I do wrong?
>>
>>685355913
Sorry bro, there's no hope for you if you thought that was actually a good idea.
>>
>>685355913
Really? The fact you asked that just answered your own question. Swagger bruh. You can't just ask that shit blatantly
>>
talk to them like the guys in porn talk to chicks.....it works for them......have fun
>>
>>685354081
you can't
>>
>>685354081
Go out insetad of shitposting on /b/ faggot
>>
>>685355913
playing video games in your room at 20....that should be the first red flag you fucking idiot....you have great moves....
>>
>>685356220
Don't listen to this guy.
If you're going to get anything as experience, talk to randos here or go on omegle.
Or, you know, go outside.
But who the fuck wants to do that?
>>
>>685355247
femanon detected. Also full of shit. Bitches stank the same way dudes stank
>>
>>685356507
ya great advice, talk to a bunch of losers on 4 chan. that should bring in the chicks for ya....
>>
>>685354081
Sauce?
>>
>>685356138
>>685356209

Well, it wasn't exactly out of the blue, she's a big time slut. All she does is talk about all the dicks she gets, what am I supposed to think?
>>
>>685354081
Treat women like shit and you'll have one in no time.
>>
>>685356767
Rule number 1, girls never want to be thought of as sluts.
You'll get slapped if you call any girl a slut outside the bedroom.
>>
>>685356767
Even if she talks about, she's most likely joking about it just to misdirect it.
>>
>>685354081
Sauce?
>>
Eventually a girl will just want to fuck you and ask you out basically. I don't ask girls out anymore as I'm a male feminist and that would be oppressive.
>>
>>685356716
Not a female you fucking idiot, a 40 year old man with tons of experience. I'm willing to bet that I can get your mother and girlfriend to drop their draws for me without effort. I know what women like and want to hear so I apply those things then get to work. You’re just some naive little punk that thinks pussy should be ready and available whenever your little dick gets hard.
>>
>>685354268
Underrated wisdom, listen to this anon, OP
>>
>>685354651

Forever this. I've been in four relationships totalling 7 years plus 2 years single (use tinder dude) and this is all there is to it. Unless you're the fattest cunt out it'll only take you 6-12 months of really hard work and research to develop an attractive body and then you just need to not be (a) creepy and (b) weak. Be assertive. Be confident. Watch lots of Scrubs.
>>
>>685355782

Holy fuck you better not be OP.
>>
>>685357231
Well, she is. And, beside the fact that we were actually in my bedroom, I never actually called her slut.

>>685357392
Fuck this shit, what am I supposed to think if all women (and people in general) is being cryptic about stuff? And I am the weird one, then people wonder why I'm cynical and misogynist.
>>
>>685356721
I'm assuming that this person is such an autist that they couldn't figure out the basics of human interaction, so this would be a good primer on it.
People call you out for your faggotry here like no other place, and you need to have to stupid beaten out of you if you ever want to get better.
>>
>>685355247
Almost 40. This guy has it right.
I dated a lot in my 20's. Met my wife when she started university. We've been together for over 10 years now.

First and foremost. Just be happy being single. Be happy being alone. And if you suffer from depression or some shit, get help and meds for that. Other than that, getting a girl friend is easy.
>>
>>685357773
made me laff
>>
>>685356767

You ask her, you are insinuating she is a slut.
Most girls want to be put into a position where they can comfortably decide on their own if they want the dick whilst at the same time appearing like they don't have a choice.

If you can master the art of giving someone a choice whilst making it look like they don't have a choice, your dick will never be dry, and the creampies will runneth over.
>>
>>685356355

Aww, who's a widdle virgey? Who's projecting?
>>
>>685358037

Nah you're just autistic.
>>
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I feel like getting fit wouldn't even save me from being a kissless virgin.
>>
>>685358265

Then teach me, master.
>>
>>685358037
That's human interaction.
The bank teller directs you to one of his associates, when he really means to say is "Fuck off", or when your professor tells you to consult the syllabus he means "Fuck off".
Don't listen to what someone says, listen to what they mean.
Also, don't talk about this with other people or else you give the message that you're a paranoid freak.
>>
>>685358037
You're and idiotic moron that can't read between the lines. You deserve what you got. Develop some fucking skills you giant twat.
>>
>>685354081
by not browsing /b/
>>
It
It's simple my /b/rother
You must simply drink the bleach.
>>
>>685358526

I literally just broke up with my gf today, so you should really ask someone else.
>>
>>685358623
Humans are fucked up, no surprise we kill each other, or rape, or start wars.
>>
>>685359010
Well, sorry about that.
>>
>>685358265
t. virgin
>>
>>685358523
Same with car, money, suit... It's a combination of more factors.
Just have a fantastic life which every girl would like to by part of
>>
>>685359041
Hey, this is a better alternative to what you just said.
That's what it means to be civilized, polite lies and holding back the worst of your impulses so we don't slide back into the hell hole of prehistory.
>>
>>685359103

No dude, i've been begging to break up with her for literally over a year. On several occasions she's refused to leave my apartment unless I agree we're still together.

The sex was great
The cuddles were great
My life still sucked
I will go into the mountains and train for 4 months, and when I emerge a beautiful butterfly I will find a superior mate who has a lower BMI and hopefully takes up less of my time. It is known.
>>
>>685359436
No, that's not an alternative, that's exactly why we're destroying ourselves. Maybe if we were more honest, more straight forward, less hypocrites, the world wouldn't suck this much.
>>
>>685355913
> handjob

At least you have guts. remember that part. You'll need it.

Then look up Corey Wayne on youtube, read his whole book, do everything in it and watch all 4,000 of this videos.

Shit fucking works. Too goddamn well. I have to carve out time for myself (like right now when I just want to relax) cuz bitches are constantly breaking down my door.

You'll eventually learn you have to make definite dates happen. My system was each morning, I figured out the next three evenings/afternoons when I wanted to be with a hot woman. Then, when I meet a woman, I see if we're compatible, can have fun, then tell her I'd like to meet her at time X at place Y. If that doesn't work, try the second timeslot and the third. If that doesn't work, just forget it. Next honey.

After that, go to the date and just have fun, tease her, enjoy yourself, don't pretend to be anything you're not. Make it cheap and short. Public place. No movies, no restaurants. Coffee, glass of wine. Sandwich. Art gallery. And make it in the evening or late afternoon. At the end of the date, kiss her good night. Not a peck, but not a full on make out session. Then wait half a week and tell her you want to see her in one of your time slots. Don't ask. Don't call her in the mean time. If she doesn't/want/can't make it, then drop/forget her forever unless she gets back in touch with you.

All this is in Corey's material. If you do anyting else except learn from him you're a fucking waste of time.
>>
>>685354081
get a lot of money and go to the gym
bonus if you can act like a complete asshole
>>
>>685359103

Also i'm 28
>>
>>685354081
First you get the money, then you get the power. Then you get the girl.
>>
>>685354081
Asking /b/ how to get a gf is like asking tumblr how to lose weight.
>>
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>>685359403
Yeah, that's really true, back when I was more excitable and clearly getting projects done, I had more women interested. I don't know what happened.
>>
Give me sauce on that webm please op.
>>
>>685360378
My sides man... sweet jesus
>>
>>685354081
all right, here it is, make sure your listening.
prepare
>prepare your entire life for having a girl round all the time.
>make sure your room is always sexy and ready for a girl, and sex.
>dress confidently every day.
>walk with your sholders back and your chin up
>never leave a dirty room or you wont want to bring a girl home
>look up sex tips, know how to finger, eat out correctly. know at least 5 positions. get to where you are confident sexually.
>have a job so you have money to spend on food for her or go to school so you have your own life and it doesnt become all about her.
>have a routine (make french press coffe twice a day, read a book for 2 hours every day so you have a life of your own before and during the relationship.

VISUALIZE
>visualie the girlfried you want to the last detail, this will be fun because you can choose.
>visualise the sex, practice, make sure you masturbate so you dont prematurley ejaculate during sex.
>SLEEP NAKED this helps you get comfortable with your body.
>visualise spending the night and having her around.

Attack
>find where girls hang out, get around girls, find where the parties are, hang out with your friends and encourage them to explore more. put yourself out there.
> LOOK HER IN THE EYES, every girl you approach, look her directly in the eyes. if she likes you shell love it.
>the goal here is to get as many phone numbers as you can. if a girl gives you her phone number, she will gladly hang out again, and sometimes this means she actually wants to fuck you. always follow up, if she doesnt text you back for a while, just wait, she may be playing games.

Finding the ONE
>when you find the one, you will know it. its a feeling that only comes every once in a while, but you will know.
>play it cool, dont talk too much, ask her about herself, let her do the talking. If you talk too much a girl can figure out more about you, wich can be bad in a lot of cases.
>when you have sex, let her sleep in bed with you,
>>
>>685359673
Come back soon, sensei, I'll be needing thy teachings.

>>685360001
Thank you, the first useful answer I get here.
>>
>>685359956
Imagine for a second everyone that doesn't like you, has a problem with the things you do and the way you look honestly expressing their distaste for you and never holding back. That would make for a great society, right?
>>
>>685360378
>Asking /b/ how to get a gf is like asking tumblr how to lose weight.

Need illustrations
>>
Don't bother. They're not worth all the fucking bullshit.
>>
>>685354081
first of by closing 4chan, faggot
>>
Try a Badoo account.
>>
>>685360968
Op said a girlfriend not a fat whore
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>>685360789
This dude will be taking cock up the ass pretty soon.
>>
>>685360470
sorry the comment was too long,

to summ it up
>prepare yourself and your place for a girlfriend
>sleep naked to get comfortable with your body
>put yourself in the vicinity of girls
>look them in the eyes
>let her do the talking, ask her questions about herself, dont talk too much


if you cant find the energy to go out looking for girls at parties etc. dont jerk off for as long as it takes you to start talking to girls, your dick will want to explode and your hormones will be crazy trying to get you to mate. naturally you will try harder, a little secret i learned from my senpai, worked for me

good luck
>>
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>>685360602
Yes, because we would avoit the people that we don't like. Right now, having to live with everybody with no restrictions, we are growing hate inside us, which will eventully come out.

P.S.
Sorry about the grammar, I did my best to not fuck up that phrase as much as possible.
>>
>>685361134
another tip is to have expensive cologne,
>spray it in your hair, spray it on your pelvis, spray it on your bedsheets.
>not too much
>>
>>685354081
Don't be afraid of rejection.
Know that deep down, all women are simple creatures, the same as men just with different sensibilities.
Get yourself out there on ANY social media platform. I met my IRL gf of 2 years on goddamn meetme.
>>
>>685354081
Look up NIck Sparks on youtube, he is kind of a douch but look past it, his stuff is very usefull. helped me and my best friend have sex with like 10+ girls in a year. (we arent much pussy slayers, im not trying to brag etc.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBhxkOai2HM
>>
>>685361207
Then please explain verbal and mental abuse, because that's what we would end up with. We hold back because of empathy and sympathy for others. Without these things, we end up in a community where anyone can approach you and say what they want however they want.
>>
>>685354081
Dont try to let her think you are rich if you arent (even if you are) it always ends badly
like dont show off with expensive clothes things etc, it will get you results, but its hard to sustain.
>>
How do you anons get confidence in yourself? Every time I have to talk to someone new or even talk in general I get a gross feeling in my throat and I need to get the fuck out of there.
>>
I know how much everyone on this site hates reddit, but if any of you are seriously looking for guidance when it comes down to getting and keeping a woman, you should all take a look at "the red pill" subreddit.
It takes a very analytical, and sometimes a little psychopathic, view point when analyzing women and relationships with women, but it's all really good stuff.
>>
>>6853628
Maybe you just gay. Try dick.
>>
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>>685354081
bcom wizar liek me
>>
>>685354081
sauce maybe ?
>>
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>>685354268
>>
>>685357781
I'm willing to bet this guy idolised Charley Sheen and has paid for sex.
>>
>>685362840
So do I, but when I know I need to act confident, I imagine myself as someone else. A Chad like character from a TV show or movie. In that moment I'm not anon, with his insecurities and flaws, I am Chad, I'm fucking flawless and perfect.
And then when ur done, just return to your normal self.
It takes a while to trick ur mind into believing it, but once you do, yoll stop spilling all that spaghetti.
Thread posts: 85
Thread images: 8



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