ITT: Nostalgic Boners
you might like this, her skinny dipping in Hair
I am a bad man
tell me I wasn't the only one beating off to toilet seat girl
pretty sure this was the first woman i ever jerked off too
14yo Lacie Chabert in the movie Lost In Space
movie's terrible but she spends the whole time in tight-fitting outfits acting incredibly pouty and sexy
Imagine being Arnold in that scene and having to be all like "damn, Jamie Curtis, you fuckin' fine, all sexy with your tight body and horrific androgynous monster face. I would totally have sex with you, both my character and the real me." when all he really wants to do is fuck another 16 year old in his dressing room. Like seriously imagine having to be Arnold and not only sit in that chair while Jamie Lee Curtis flaunts her disgusting body in front of you, the favorable lighting barely concealing her stretchmarks and leathery skin, and just sit there, take after take, hour after hour, while she perfected that dance. Not only having to tolerate her monstrous fucking visage but her haughty attitude as everyone on set tells her she's STILL GOT IT and DAMN, JAMIE LEE CURTIS LOOKS LIKE *THAT*?? because they're not the ones who have to sit there and watch her mannish fucking gremlin face contort into types of grimaces you didn't even know existed before that day. You've been fucking nothing but a healthy diet of blondes and supermodels and later alleged rape victims for your ENTIRE CAREER coming straight out of the boonies in Austria. You've never even seen anything this fucking disgusting before, and now you swear you can taste the sweat that's breaking out on her dimpled stomach as she sucks it in to writhe it suggestively at you, smugly assured that you are enjoying the opportunity to get paid to sit there and revel in her "statuesque (for that is what she calls herself)" beauty, the beauty she worked so hard for with personal trainers in the previous months. And then the director calls for another take, and you know you could kill every single person in this room before the studio security could put you down, but you sit there and endure, because you're fucking Arnold. You're not going to lose your future political career over this. Just bear it. Hide your face and bear it.
I wanted to fuck her mouth mercilessly
You know you would.
this right here, this is the correct answer
>tfw I bought the DVD of My Stepmother Is An Alien to fap to 13yo Alyson Hannigan
>totally worth it
Imagine having those thighs wrapped around your neck while she pushes her red bush into your mouth...
this and britney spears toxic in the sparkly skin coloured bodysuit
Holly Valance in her Kiss Kiss music video was a instant diamonds one for me.
Not gonna lie, the though of that just made me almost cum. No homo.
fuck i always thought brittany was over rated. maybe its because of her annoying voice and slutty persona that made my human instincts kick in to tell me there was something wrong with this girl and i shouldn't want to stick my dick in her.
im into blondes and shit too its just her face and body i just a 7/10 and after adding on her slutty behaviour and horrible singing makes her like a 4/10 then after seeing current Brittany all fucked up makes her an easy 2/10
Anabella Lwin, especially when she posed naked on the cover of a single aged 15
until she had that cosmetic surgery that made her look like an elderly rent boy
I got my first boner to her. She was in an elevator humping a guy's face
Gawd damn. THIS is what she used to look like/ Someone needs to track that surgeon down and beat him to death with an aluminum dildo.
She's also a genius.
Years ago I taped the mtv awards and garbage performed only happy when it rains.
She got up in front of everyone and just grabbed her crotch so hard.
I'd never seen anything like it at the time and fapped until it fell off.
here's an old school fap. unfortunately i forgot what her name is.
All saved to fap folder. Thank you, based Anon. You are my hero. I have nothing to give you in return but every single one of my internets.
She needed 5 pounds of makeup for the camera to get within 20 feet of her though. This other blonde tho...
I was seriously in love with her when i was younger.
Think Charmed was her last show she was young enough in, shame they wasted so much screentime on 90210.
Don't hurt yourself anon...
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire NSW armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across Australia and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Australian Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, cunt.
Girls Gone Wild infomercials late at night.
I devoted billions of water babies to this little motherfucker.