[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y ] [Search | Free Show | Home]

Fuck me sideways. 28 y/o Alabama anon here - my best friends

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 257
Thread images: 39

File: image.jpg (466KB, 1600x1120px) Image search: [Google]
image.jpg
466KB, 1600x1120px
Fuck me sideways. 28 y/o Alabama anon here - my best friends sister just turned 16. Just tested positive.. I absolutely 100% I'm only guys she's been with. She refuses to talk abortion. How fucked am I ? She looks ok but I think my BF and her parents are going to fucking kill me. Any bright ideas /b?
>>
>>675728234
Do a flip faggot!
>>
Falcon punch girl in stomach a few times
>>
>>675728234
Push her over the stairs
>>
>>675728234
Pour bleach down her pussy.
>>
>>675728234
>tested positive
>100% only guy shes been with
>i think my bf

stop
>>
If you pump her full of vitamin c it can induce an abortion, but unless you live with her that will be hard - I'm talking massive amounts cooked into food.

Or if she's hot you could just marry her, it'd be easier.
>>
>>675728487
Roll
>>
smoke crack.

you're not a coward are you?
>>
>>675728985
This, just marry her op you fucked either way. Should have pulled out like a champ alpha and came all over her asshole
>>
>>675728234
Man up
You fucked her raw. You deal with it
>>
>>675728944

This
>>
Ayyy maybe you should have her move in and slam that 16 yo pussy for as long as you can.

I'm 27 and I've realized I'll probably never fuck a fresh 18 year old again...
>>
>>675728234
cut her head off
>>
>>675728234
So by best friends sister you probably mean your sister being Alabama and all.
>>
>>675728850
This should work, OP.
>>
>>675728234

relax anon, its alabama. That shit flies. I'm sure your uncle cousin daryl will talk it over with his brother jethro about you knocking up his daughter-sister
>>
>>675728234
If any of this is true, you are legit going to jail. Should've thought twice about having unprotected sex with a 15 year old you dumb faggot.
>>
>>675729126
Rolling
>>
File: goats.jpg (14KB, 436x311px) Image search: [Google]
goats.jpg
14KB, 436x311px
>>675728234
Join ISIS
>>
>>675728234
How old is your bf? And what made you fuck a 16yo if you like guys?
>>
So true - would have never fucked her but it just kind of happened. We were smoking a bowl and she caught me looking at her feet. I have a huge foot fetish. We started fooling around and next thing I know she rubbing her pussy on my dick. We started with just the tip but she started bleeding and she locked her legs around my ass. It's kind of gross but the blood felt so amazing.
>>
File: eb7.jpg (123KB, 942x943px) Image search: [Google]
eb7.jpg
123KB, 942x943px
>>675730645
>>
>>675730156
OP here. Well BF stands for Best friend or in this case ex-BF. We are both 25 and i know his sister since she was born. I really dont know what to do here...
>>
>>675728234
28 man tha fuck up. You need to do right by that little girl and your new family.
>>
>>675730919

>We are both 25
>Fuck me sideways. 28 y/o Alabama anon here
>28 y/o

OP's slippin
>>
>>675728234
become a sailor/ join the navy
start a new life living in the high seas

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGyPuey-1Jw
>>
Bribe her for an abortion.
>>
>>675730919
Be the man that fucked that girl marry her. Do right by your bf and her parents.
>>
Just pretend it was after she turned 16? it's completely legal. Screw your friend, screw the chick, screw the kid. Move away.
Hope you had fun.
>>
File: image.jpg (24KB, 236x354px) Image search: [Google]
image.jpg
24KB, 236x354px
OP here - pic related. I couldn't resist.
>>
Alabama hmm?
>Fucked my best friends sister and got her pregnant

>Fucked my best friends sister

>Fucked my friends sister

>Fucked my sister

FIX'D
>>
Rip OP
>>
File: 20160211_185230.png (784KB, 1079x797px) Image search: [Google]
20160211_185230.png
784KB, 1079x797px
>>675731812
Redneck. Now this story makes total sense.
>>
>>675731812

apparently neither can google images

keep on diggin
>>
>>675728234
>Alabama
>16

Shes getting a little long in the tooth for Alabama, isn't she?
>>
I can't understand shit
>>
Where in bama. I'm here too. Can handle the situation. At least give her a proper fucking.
>>
>>675728234
mexico
>>
Not so simple to just leave. I just had my house trailer moved to a new lot and there a years lease on it. Her dad is at Kilby prison for a drug charge but my BF is in college at Tuscaoosa (Roll Tide motherfuckers). Brandy looks good but she's fucking 16 and has no idea how hard life is. She wants to go to Cosmo school to cut hair. I'm just getting my life started as a basic EMT hopefully yo go on to Paramedic. Have no clue what to do.
>>
>>675732721
Where are you? Pics of chick? I have people in the doc, but not at kilby.
>>
>>675732721
Dude you are 28. Sack up. You own trailer... are emit be a good man. And take care of her. She can got learn to cut hair. You can choose a good life. If you leave her and your baby your life is fucked. Be a man sack up and take care of her.
>>
File: OP.jpg (83KB, 487x475px) Image search: [Google]
OP.jpg
83KB, 487x475px
Found OP
>>
>>675728234
>best friends sister
douche
>I'm only guys she's been with
fool
>>
>>675728234

Whew... that's a tough one. Good luck friendo.
>>
>>675728234
There's the good ol' stairway abortion
>>
Just remember...

God doesn't give anyone anything they can't handle.


Atheist: 0
Christians: 1
>>
>>675733510

Hmmm... children with terminal illnesses?
>>
>>675731339
Agreed, a pirates life for OP.
>>
>>675733510
Like cancer and aids
>>
>>675728234
quads name your baby

guasimodo charlies junior
>>
Having a child is the absolute worst reason ever to get married and play house. 1st kid OP? K now you know where they come from. Don't fuck up like this again. Pay support and don't fuckin let some bitch and her kid ruin your life.
>IM A FIRM BELIEVER IN A MANS RIGHT TO CHOOSE! IF YOUR CUNT AND STINKY HOLE ALONG WITH YOUR RANCID WOMB OF A WHORE HAS CHOICES THAN I SHOULD HAVE THE CHOICE OF OPTING OUT OF PARENTING/SUPPORTING THE SELFISH LITTLE FUCKED UP BRAT.

When you think about it, it would make America great again if men had the right to opt out. Bitches would quit shitting out their welfare checks, men would be happier and less oppressed, especially white men.
>>
>>675734504

Magnus McSmoothrod
>>
>>675732721
No one in Alabama misspells Tuscaloosa. It's just about the only thing they have pride in spelling correctly.
>>
Sorry guys I think you are missing the point. Basically she was at my trailer waiting for her mom to get home (next door). I started admiring her feet. Gave her a foot massage. She said I could kiss her toes if I wanted... I asked if I could kiss her lips as well. Yep. Got her shirt off - swear to Christ guys PUFFY nipples - I mean like the nipples were almost bigger than the boobs.. WTF...had those things in my mouth. Then she pulled out my dick. I'm not exactly huge but she went down on me.. A few minutes passed and I was going down on her. Her pussy was kind of rank but she had been in gym class and had to run that day. We started rubbing my dick on her clit and then we just put the tip in - one thing led to another and I got a bit excited I noticed blood on my dick and she said this was her first time. She locked her legs and the blood feeling and smell made me cum buckets. I immediately felt bad about it and asked her to leave. I have fucked her 4 times since then... Always after school. She is now texting me non stop and wants me to take her to her first OB/GYN appointment. I told her that her mom can put me in jail... But she says her mom likes me... I'm so fucked.
>>
>>675734999
pics or it didn't happen
>>
an idiot is born every minute? and?
>>
>>675728234
feed her an abortifacient
>>
>>675734638
Check your privilege. This young guy should man up and take care of that little girl and her baby.
>>
>>675734999

Holy hell. Got yourself in a situation to say the least.
>>
>>675734999
No you're not. Do right by that young woman. You have a trailer, a job. Take care of her have a life. She sounds sweet be the man in her life. Other things will workout.
>>
I like the way you think brother first piece of solid advice in this entire thread. Here's the problem... I'm afraid Brandys mom will have me arrested if I don't accept responsibility. Her mother works at one of those check cashing / title loan stores so she makes ok money but I kinda doubt she wants to raise another kid. Her and Brandy don't get along very well.
>>
>>675728944
Are you too stupid to understand that OP is using BF as best friend, not boyfriend?

>>675728234
Also OP, we all know you ain't fucked your "best friends sister" but you actually fucked your sister, so you're pretty screwed since you're a pedophile that likes incest.
>>
>>675728234
Are you in 205 man?
>>
It's called a condom, you fucking idiot. Life's over now, home slice
>>
Didn't take pictures - sorry.. I realize your 14 and all but when men fuck girls we don't always have 14 cameras running.
>>
>>675736167

Yeah, if the girl really likes you and the mother doesn't like here you're in for a ride. Tread lightly.
>>
>>675728234
Move to another country. Cut all ties. Delete all social media profiles.
>>
File: 55.png (8KB, 225x225px) Image search: [Google]
55.png
8KB, 225x225px
>>675728234
>filename
>>
>>675736167
Brandy is now yours. Her Mom will be proud of her young son in law that's done better for her daughter already then she's ever done. Be the man your an EMT. Take care o that girl, your baby and have a good, great life.
>>
>>675735509
>said check your privilege
>unironically
>>
Bamafag here too. 256.

You're fucked OP.
>>
>>675728234
why are you fucking girls if you're gay op? you have a bf that you stick your dick in already
>>
256 - Talapoosa County
>>
File: Magic preggo.gif (1MB, 285x300px) Image search: [Google]
Magic preggo.gif
1MB, 285x300px
>>675728234

Falcon Punch?
>>
>>675736511

Why wouldn't you have a proper camera set up in your dungeon?
>>
Not gay BF equals best friend. We grew up together.
>>
>>675737045

And how often do you have sex?
>>
File: 48d.png (69KB, 600x466px) Image search: [Google]
48d.png
69KB, 600x466px
>>675736638
Thanks Sherlock
You prouved OP is a fake. gg
>>
File: CeQHLRsWwAEISPE.jpg (11KB, 236x236px) Image search: [Google]
CeQHLRsWwAEISPE.jpg
11KB, 236x236px
>>675737284
>>
>>675736557
Yeah OP solid advice right here, tread lightly into her mothers room. Your BF's family will have no choice in accepting you if you also knock his mom up!
>>
>>675734999
Be great dad
>But she says her mom likes me
>fuck her mom too
>>
>>675728234
Post nudes.

Then enlist in the Navy and see the world.
>>
>>675728234
bring her to 6 flags in roughly 6 months
>>
Just out of curiosity - do you think it's possible to not be a virgin and still have a partial intact hymen thing. I mean she bled that night - a lot. She messed up my couch real bad but she told me one time that she had fooled around with this other guy from her school. I'm 90% sure it's a half nigger drug dealer that hangs around the trailer park. She denies it but jail or not if I find out she sucked off a nigger I Will never speak to the hitch again - kid or not. I hate Niggerlovers.
>>
move to israel
get a new name
become a goat herder
>>
File: Waluigi Card Mastah.png (173KB, 375x524px) Image search: [Google]
Waluigi Card Mastah.png
173KB, 375x524px
>>675728234
Show her a picture of Waluigi.
>>
>>675734999
Yeah, OP fuck her mom it's the only way
>>
File: xZ7wd0gh[1].jpg (26KB, 400x307px) Image search: [Google]
xZ7wd0gh[1].jpg
26KB, 400x307px
Man, fuck that bitch man. She's a professional lyologist.
>>
>>675737045
OP be a man grow a pair talk to your friend tell him. You'll do the right thing and care for young Brandy. Now you get to be brothers.
>>
>>675734219
And unwanted pregnancies that the bitch won't flush.
>>
>>675728234
Just move outta state, change your number, and make all your social media private. Keep tabs on her tho in case the kid ends up being famous you can come back into their life.
>>
>>675728234
so what isn't the age of consent like 12 in alabama?
>>
>>675728234
Get MPT Kit. Administer in her food/drink. Next day, problem solved!

You have 50 days from today. Go!
>>
>>675738014
Yeah I get the predicament you're in, what if in 9 months all you have to show for you chivalry is a black baby with drug dealer genes...

Better to fuck the mom too, at least have one baby this year
>>
>>675734638
You just went full bama cousin.
>>
Is there a staircase nearby?
>>
>>675728234
Hey! I live in Bama too! If you want, you can post her address and I can go "induce" abortion!
>>
>>675732721
>>675732721
>Not so simple to just leave. I just had my house trailer moved to a new lot and there a years lease on it. Her dad is at Kilby prison for a drug charge but my BF is in college at Tuscaoosa (Roll Tide motherfuckers). Brandy looks good but she's fucking 16 and has no idea how hard life is. She wants to go to Cosmo school to cut hair. I'm just getting my life started as a basic EMT hopefully yo go on to Paramedic. Have no clue what to do.

really hoping this is bait
>>
>>675731251
this he was originally 28 now he is 25. Get your story straight mate
>>
>>675728234
Pretty fucked / 10. Don't know Alabama laws, is that rape?
Was it worth it?
>>
>>675728234
your first mistake was falling for the trickery of 3D women
>>
File: 1440644371561.jpg (78KB, 472x472px) Image search: [Google]
1440644371561.jpg
78KB, 472x472px
>>675728234
Basically kys. If trips you gotta do it.
>>
>>675728234
op... lookup Pennyroyal tea... get some...
then....
call her over.
give her some tea from the dried leaf.
rub her back with some pennyroyal oil and coconut oil mixed together.
make her dinner.
sit down and watch a movie.
repeat until induced abortion.
never speak to her again.
>>
>>675738887
off bah 1
>>
File: download_20160124_030705.jpg (9KB, 270x480px) Image search: [Google]
download_20160124_030705.jpg
9KB, 270x480px
>>675738887
Underrated
>>
>>675728234
You're going to jail if she tells someone, just get prepared to be refered to as 'chomo'.
>>
>>675738331

Mr. Show is the greatest thing to ever be on TV.
>>
>>675728234
FAKE!

http://pregosarah.blogspot.com/2011/12/pregnant-again.html
>>
OP Here - thanks for the chat. I'm getting out of her now as I have to work in morning. Still have no fucking clue what to do about all this and in case you are wondering - this is absolutely real. Learn from my fuck ups - wear a condom. Oh and I'll leave you with one more thing that I didn't mention hut I know you guys are going to love....
I unfortunately got Herpes last year. I don't have an outbreak currently but Brandy doesn't know. I swear guys it just can't get any worse.
>>
>>675728234

I want you to read this closely, really mull it over.

You can get things on track for now. Take care of her, take care of the baby, be supportive overall. Don't jump the gun and get married. As long as you don't get too emotionally involved and distance yourself a little with your work this shouldn't be too hard. Keep it on level. I'm not saying don't love her, just don't treat it like it's the end all be all. This leads me to my next point...

It's going to end. There's no avoiding it. She hasn't even matured yet, and when she does she is going to change. Probably 5-6 years. Nothing you can do is going to wow her into revisualizing you at that point short of a ring, and all things considered that probably won't cut i. She is going to realize how you both fucked up and it should never have happened. She's not going to want to look at you anymore. Your only saving grace will be how good of a father and partner you were through those years. Maybe she won't ruin you. Maybe you'll get to continue being a father.
>>
File: Snapchat-4711677498658144998.jpg (51KB, 480x782px) Image search: [Google]
Snapchat-4711677498658144998.jpg
51KB, 480x782px
I feel bad for ya brah. Better hope they dont press charges.
>>
>>675739782
>http://pregosarah.blogspot.com/2011/12/pregnant-again.html

Confirmed, OP is fake
>>
Real world answer:
Accept responsibility and do your best to raise that brown baby as your own. Fuck the mom on the side to keep her side of the family happy. Problem solved.
>>
Didn't have a picture of her stick.. She was tested in the ER at Opelika
>>
>>675739811

Fucking moron. Learn to keep your dick in your pants.
>>
>>675740356

Haha. I live in Millbrook.
>>
just an hero
>>
>>675728234
Grew up in Mississippi. First long term girlfriend (6 years) was devout christian family. Constantly worried bout getting her pregnant bec. she was the type you wouldnt do anything if her momma told her not to (Cept for fucking like Grape Ape, hypocrite slut) Do this, talk to her private, tell her you will pay for abortion. Fucking tell her you love her blah blah, just try to brainwash her into getting an abortion. Chances are, if she Alabama and devout christian she can be brainwashed. Best fucking luck. If all else fails do something stupid like get her drunk one night and tell her in the morning "holy shit babe, you drank last night, the kid will be 100% no doubt fucking retarded just from having one drink. Then cut shit off with that dumb whore pronto. She can be persuaded, just dont stop trying. From one bro to another, you can convince her eventually. Then break shit off with the stupid 16 year old whore who actually wants to keep her fetus. Dont let up, as soon as she starts crying and you see a glimmer of hope of her changing her mind call planned parenthood and schedule it for TODAY. Do not wait on hour more than you have to. As soon as you break her down, get it done. The very minute. Do not wait until tomorrow. God Speed.
>>
>>675740638
This is your best bet
>>
>>675739811
OP if your still around, she probably gave you the AIDs she got from the nigger
>the blood was peroid
>>
>>675728234
Do this:
Make her eat loads of food so she looks fat, then wait until the baby comes, u take away from her until she's 18, then you did it.
>>
>>675741088
The dubs say you have a point... my mind can't get around to it yet, but you probably have a valid point in there somewhere
>>
>>675729228
/thread
>>
File: 1437407683110.jpg (20KB, 320x374px) Image search: [Google]
1437407683110.jpg
20KB, 320x374px
>>675732144
>>
get her really drunk one night
next day get 3 or 4 abortion pills, grind them up and put them in a smoothie
blame the dead fetus on the drinking
>>
>>675740899
Sweet check my dubs. Seriously not fucking trolling you. Try every trick use every insecure thing about her to convince her. You WILL. She will eventually start crying and talking about what it will be like if she DOES get abortion. That very fucking second get it done. Make an appointment. Do anything you can to make her less reluctant to backing out. Make it seem like it was her decision, schedule that abortion, once you do she will be 50% more likely of following through. Take the lead, be forceful. Maybe she will resent you, but you will not be a child support paying fag for the rest of your life. God Speed.
>>
>>675740899
Bumping my own advice bec. feels for anon. Been with devout southern dumb ass whore. Play her emotions. Break her down. You can if you try hard enough. Do it. Be harsh, be mean. she may very well resent you, but you will be doing you both a favor. Seriously dont overlook my advice. Best way to do it (punching her in the stomach advice is bullshit) Best way to do it is to break her down and brainwash her. Then take the lead, schedule it, tell her she cant back out. Fuck tell her you have a lawyer (she may be looking for that typical southern whore easy way out thru child support) DO NOT LET UP. EVERY SECOND OF EVERY FUCKING DAY TRY TO BREAK HER DOWN.
>>
Thanks brother
>>
>>675742552
OP is still going to jail for stat reap
>niggers gonna pound his ass
>>
>>675728234
Well if they kill you then you don't have to worry about your bastard.
>>
>>675728234
born in AL

not gonna be president anyway, doesn't matter
>>
>>675742552
Heres is one more advice from me. You might have to play into her selfishness (good chance shes a typical southern who looking for child support and a gov. dole) Tell her this. "Babe, I been doing crack a few times lately, I didnt want to tell you bec. I love you but our baby will be born retarted. Do you have any idea how much it costs for the medical attention an baby like that would need? Welfare wouldnt cover it. We would both have to get full time jobs. Look babe, if you get an abortion I promise ill quit the crack and we can have another kid in a few years. You will be poor all your life if you carry this baby full term. I love you I want you to have my baby. But we need to try again later. You know you the chances of him being normal are slim to none. Could you live with that on your consience? I love you babe and want you to have my baby. But this isnt the way. I'm calling planned parenthood tonight. Lets just get this over with" Then fucking break off with the gold digger typical southern welfare/ child support riding bitch. GOD SPEED ANON.
>>
>>675744220
dude OP and his bitch both live in traliers
>they is poor and always will be
>>
tell her you will kill yourself if she doesn't flush it out
>>
>>675744220
Please Please all anons check my advice. I been in a similar situation (was a false alarm). Please, dont discount my advice. Save my text for the future.>>675742552
>>675741767
>>675740899
Please anons, theres not much life advice I can give. But seriously consider mine if ever in that situation.
>>
>>675744638
and post /b/ if she calls bluff
>>
>>675744526
exactly why anons whore girl will want to carry to term and try to get welfare and child support. Gotta play on her selfishness. Gotta never give up trying to convince dumb whore to abort.
>>
fake your own death
>>
>>675744526
Dated mississippi whore who tried to pull the same shit. I know what I'm talking about. They are looking for the welfare and child support. Brainwash that whore. Check all my advices. and God Speed.>>675744691
>>
OP, did you not google "how to induce a miscarriage"? Actually, it's better that you didn't, depending on the state.

So, as it turns out, 75% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage. Most of the time, the woman doesn't even realize she's miscarried. You wanna induce miscarriage? Here are some things you can do:

1) Vitamin C - Get her to take shit tons of it daily for the next few days. DO NOT EXCEED 6,000mg per day, or you might send your gf to the emergency room (expensive, but not super deadly, usually).

2) Raw cinnamon / cinnamon supplements. You can buy these things pretty much anywhere. Do NOT EXCEED half a TEAspoon, or you risk as above.

3) Blue and Black Cohosh mixture. Google this, too much text to put in here for preparation.
>>
File: photo (11).jpg (186KB, 1600x1195px) Image search: [Google]
photo (11).jpg
186KB, 1600x1195px
I think you should falcon punch straight to 27/12 2011 and cheat that kid out of a chance of life
#nice try OP
>>
>>675734638
As the population plummets and all the mud slimes come to fill the gap. Wonderful idea.
>>
>>675728234
>I absolutely 100% I'm only guys she's been with.
Poor grammar aside, you're 100% not. That sweet innocent little girl could've have been spit roasted by 20 niggers one night and you'd never fucking know. Get a paternity test if she tries to trap your ass. If it's you, sorry bro. lol
>>
>>675745841
>>675745653
People here are not reading my advice. I promise mine has the best LEGAL bet of getting bitch to abort. Falcon punches and posisoning are not the way to go. Checkem. Your best bet is mental games. Seriously read my replies. Starting with this one.>>675744220
and finish with these.>>675742552
>>675741767
>>675740899
>>
>>675746651
Your advice is retarded. It's way easier to slip massive amounts of vitamin c into the girl's kool-aid than it is to convince her of that shit. Plus, once the fetus is gone, she's free to be someone else's problem, if she wants to get knocked up again.
>>
>>675731812
image jpg FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKKKKKE
>>
>>675736511
MEN?
MEN FUCK LIL GIRLS
NICE
CANT WAIT TO BE A MAN
>>
What are you tripping about exactly...about having a baby, not wanting a baby, stachetory rape? Are you positive about age of consent there? Here in Washington state it's 16 years old with no age difference laws.
>>
>>675745653
Don't do this shit, way too easy to get caught, then you get charged with poisoning, assault, can get double charged I some states for the fetus. Just stop being a total fucking pusssy
>>
>>675746931
Really, and you think her docs wouldnt fucking see a huge amount of Vitamin C in her blood. They will follow that up. It amounts to poisioning. Is vitamin C even a fool proof plan. Bec. I'm pretty much sure convincing the bitch to get an abortion is a more legal and sure fire way of dealing with it. You dont think her docs are going to find an ungodly amount of vitamin C in her blood? They are going to take one look at that tox screen and start asking her what the fuck shes been eating. Then the police will get involved. Stop being 13. Dont fucking drug the bitch. Brainwash her. Its totally do-able. and legal.
>>
File: 1381587526568.jpg (36KB, 448x495px) Image search: [Google]
1381587526568.jpg
36KB, 448x495px
>>675747491
>stachetory
>>
OP listen up

Go on the tor browser, find abortion pills, put it in her drink, profit!
>>
>>675747981
Phuck hue speling poleece
>>
File: MysteryoftheUrinalDeuce02.jpg (371KB, 3300x2550px) Image search: [Google]
MysteryoftheUrinalDeuce02.jpg
371KB, 3300x2550px
>>675747981
>>Shay stadium
>>
>>675730919
28 or 25. I NAME THEE, TROLL.
>>
>>675729371
Man you gotta stop with that
>>
File: james-morris-poster[1].jpg (30KB, 900x600px) Image search: [Google]
james-morris-poster[1].jpg
30KB, 900x600px
>>675747981
>>
>>675728234
So you fucked a 16 year old girl, without condom, and you didn't talk about contraceptive or abortion ?

Kill yourself.
>>
>>675729240
Lots of young girl likes older men. Especially the slutty one.
>>
>>675739162
This
>>
Check your laws, age of consent is 16 in alabama...anal and oral however are illegal there, go figure
>>
Well now that you've been cocktrapped, the only thing left to do is Falcon-Punch!

Seriously, you're both in for a shitty life. You're going to be stuck at whatever shitty job you're at now trying to provide for your new family and will have absolutely no time to yourself between raising a kid and working at your job.

Your babymama is 16 for chrissake. Calling her "immature" would be an understatement. After she spits out the kid, she's going to have to drop out of school and basically make no money until she has time (a couple years later) to get a GED, and even then college or even a technical school will be a distant dream. Since she'll be so busy raising the kid, she'll basically be a socially stunted 16 year old for years to come.
And unless you are both ready to be the kind, loving parents it takes to raise a good kid, (I don't know about you, but your 16 year old bride definitely isn't, or won't be when she sees how much fun all her friends who didn't get preggers are having in a couple of years), the kid you produce will be a fucked up trashy brat who will go no further than either of you ever did, and its only life accomplishment will be producing even more trashy brats to replace it, just as you two did.

This is why the south is such a fucked up place. Because supposedly Jesus said abortion is bad somewhere in the Bible, so you have a bunch of people fucking and refusing to get an abortion because it might cause a tornado or some dumb shit, so they try to romanticize the notion of playing house without considering that maybe they are not emotionally mature enough, or even at at a good place in their life to support a child so the kid ends up growing up to be a fucked up, sociopathic halfwit, just like its parents.
>>
Where are in AL?
>>
>>675734504
ifucked mysister
>>
>>675728234
Your going to jail. Have FUN BUD
>>
>>675747924
>>675747878

>Way too easy to get caught
>Water-soluble vitamin that clears the system in 24 hours
>No negative side-effects when taken within the limit I'd just described

Seriously, do you even science?
>>
Uncut here. I have so much sensation that I prefer to fuck my gf slowly. Always masturbated rubbing with nice fabrics like satin and it has always been fucking awesome. I cum liters. I also have minor phimosis but it doesn't bother me at all, no pain, no nothing.

Where I live, being cut is a sign of being jew. We always joke about it. I don't really think there's too much difference so don't believe the ones saying you had a part of you taken away. It's just more sensitive, that´s it. I think cut guys can achieve the same sensation but have to rub more.
>>
>>675749030
>>675748777
>>675747924
>>675746931
>>675746651
All these falcon punch and poison her threads are giving me diabetes. Seriously, check my advice. You can do what I said. It take a large mental commitment, but if you have half a brain it wont be hard to encourage a 16 year old alabama whore to abort. You can do it. Brainwash that bitch into aborting. Dont fucking poision her, dont fucking falcon punch her. Play on her selfish emotions.>>675744220
>>
>>675734638
Man can choose. They actually have plenty of opportunity to choose.

They can choose to fuck with condom.
They can choose to pull out
They can choose to fuck girl who aren't dumb enough to lie about their contraception and take it properly

OP choose to cum in a 16yo girl pussy, because he's a degenerate pothead. He already made his choices
>>
You're fucked dude.
>>
>>675749030
Don't listen to this faggot, having kids isn't bad, just deal with it. Better for you to cooperate than have her file for child support, then you are fucked. If you can convince her to NOT PUT YOUR NAME ON BIRTH CERTIFICATE that would be huge in the eyes of the law if you are trying to not be involved. When the baby pops out, I'd go to the store and buy a paternity test...they aren't that expensive
>>
>>675749729
Did you even read >>67549030?

The Falcon-Punch was a stupid joke; the ultimate advice was to convince her to abort.
>>
>>675749452
No he's not, learn to read and research the law...unless you at a nigger then you should contact the last public defender who defended you for being a dumb nigger
>>
>>675728234
you're fucked brah
>>
>>675728234
she a cheating bitch that lies to you. how do u know ur dick the only she had
>>
>>675728234
try pushing her down some stairs
>>
>>675750027
>says having kids isn't that bad
>advises you to not put your name on birth certificate

ANOTHER LESSON FROM THE SCUMBAG STEVE SCHOOL OF PARENTING. (BUT ABORTION IS BAD, M'KAY?)
>>
File: image.jpg (69KB, 461x665px) Image search: [Google]
image.jpg
69KB, 461x665px
>>675728234
>>
& twitter.com/Gawker/status/713235678113488896
>>
>>675744220
Ive said my piece, Hope best for anon. Coming from Mississippi (Alabama's neighbor) That 16 year old cunt is hoping for welfare and child support. Gotta play on her selfishness. But good luck man. Falcon punch and poision her if you gotta, but I think my approach has the best bet. You could brainwash that bitch into aborting. I done it. God Speed never the less. I gotta eject from this thread bec. all the falcon punch replies are giving me liver failure.
>>
File: dea.gif (3KB, 400x300px) Image search: [Google]
dea.gif
3KB, 400x300px
OP is fucked.

Well, then again, it IS Alabama.
>>
File: Black Guy Pranking Dad.gif (1MB, 320x180px) Image search: [Google]
Black Guy Pranking Dad.gif
1MB, 320x180px
>>675731251
Maybe it was a typo 5 and 8 are close on the num pad
>>
>>675728234

Prison...or marriage, which is its own kind of prison I suppose.
>>
File: 1404683961567.jpg (19KB, 500x353px) Image search: [Google]
1404683961567.jpg
19KB, 500x353px
>>675728234

> 28 y/o Alabama anon here
>my little sister just turned 13. Just tested positive..

Corrected it for you.
>>
Stairs....very high staircase.
>>
File: John-Candy-GIF.gif (3MB, 300x169px) Image search: [Google]
John-Candy-GIF.gif
3MB, 300x169px
>>675751719
>>
>>675734791
They do if they are Auburn fans. But no one that is a real ROOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLL TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEEEE would do it. Unless drunk or too stoned to type.
>>
>>675729240
>I'm 27 and I've realized I'll probably never fuck a fresh 18 year old again...
Yes you will I was fucking a 17 year old when I was 35
>>
File: 1453434506650.jpg (50KB, 751x418px) Image search: [Google]
1453434506650.jpg
50KB, 751x418px
OP confirmed for literal retard
>>
File: 1446265417883.gif (622KB, 499x310px) Image search: [Google]
1446265417883.gif
622KB, 499x310px
>>675730645
>>675730853
>>
>>675728234
Anhero your way out quick!
>>
>>675739162
bump
>>
>>675751022
Read the whole post nigger
>>
File: ace-dancing.gif (417KB, 400x302px) Image search: [Google]
ace-dancing.gif
417KB, 400x302px
OP, I have an idea. Post nudes of her, shame her then she will an hero.
>>
>>675733150
ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT?!
>>
>>675728234
Go to Vegas get married behind their back, fucking roll with it...
>>
>>675752356
English, yes bad much language main faggot no
>>
OP i had a similar situation - no baby involved but i was banging a girl who was 2 months short of being legal (17) when i was in my mid 20s, parents and friends knew and everyone liked me and approved, her parents offered for me to stay over whenever i wanted. About a year later i dumped her to chase a hotter chick and everyone turned on me, went to cops, and i got caught. In hindsight i brought it on myself of course.

Your #1 job is to keep her happy. If you piss off her or her mom and they go to the cops, you may have troubles. Especially if she has saved messages between you, etc. Age of the baby according to doctors along with DNA test would also be solid evidence. So, stay with her, treat her (and your baby) well, and keep her happy. If she leaves you, fine, but don't leave her without being prepared for a shitstorm. And if you guys stay together and raise your kid, well, worse things have happened, right?
>>
>>675736167
Which explains why your best friend's sister wanted to get pregnant. It's her golden ticket away from her mom.

You do NOT want to be involved with that scene.

Abortion, abortion, abortion. The girl is 16. She doesn't even know what her favorite food will be in 10 years from now. She has no clue about anything yet, other than she's known you her whole life, so you'd make a good daddy to support her as she escapes her home and jumps feet first into being "an adult".

16 is way too young for kids, even if she has a confused 25 to 28 year old EMT whose friend of identical age would only be at Alabama if he served a couple of hitches in the armed services.

You better talk to her mom and get on the same page as one way or another, you are screwed. But if your little anxious 16 year old baby cooker keeps it, you, her, and her mom will be super uber screwed.

So man up, and stock helping a 16 year old get high so she can climb on you and get pregnant to escape her teen life with mom. And remember, always wrap your rascal if you don't want your cumsleeve getting pregnant. Or just get yourself a 2D wife and an onahole and be truly safe, lonely neckbeard.
>>
>>675728234
http://www.ageofconsent.com/alabama.htm

If her parents are good, they will press charges. Have fun taking it up the ass in prison. And also being on the sexual offender's list for life.
>>
>>675728546
this
>>
>>675728234
>I'm only guys she's been with

LOL CUCK
>>
>>675728234
Use the hanger method while she sleeps.
>>
>>675738577
>MPT Kit
9 weeks max.
OP has not said when he came in her
>>
File: condom-cartoon.jpg (34KB, 319x300px) Image search: [Google]
condom-cartoon.jpg
34KB, 319x300px
Betcha wish you wore one of these now.
Enjoy watching your formerly cute (if not a bit underage) hottie slowly turn into a fat, obsessed, shrieking hellbeast. Enjoy things like "getting enough sleep" and "having fun" while you still can.

Your life has been written.
>>
What Is the Age of Consent in Alabama?

In Alabama, the age of consent for sexual intercourse is 16. Generally, a person over the age of 16 can consent to sex with anyone else who is over the age of 16.


You might be ok, but I still suggest a large flight of stairs.
>>
Any anons remember the whole /b/rad from last year? The story sounds similiar.
>>
>>675729228


Word
>>
>>675728234
You'll never be able to get out of this. If her parents actually settle with no charges, they will report you right when you try to take off.
>>
>>675728234
This is what you get for fucking teens. They're fucking dumb.
>>
>>675728234
Try to turn into your astral form dude
>>
>>675738014
It's possible for women who've fucked 30 guys to still bleed when you fuck them. It just depends on the physical organs involved.

She could have also bled a lot because she was on her period. Girls are extra horny when they are bleeding, and they are extra fertile. It's the mess they make when they are on their period that make most girls not want to fuck, even though they are extra horny. Most fine the mess embarrassing.

She may have just been on the rag. In fact, most girls barely bleed when you pop their cherry. But they will bleed a lot all over when you fuck them and they are having their period.
>>
>>675753201
Yep...she'll be sucking down ice cream, chittlins and McDonald's faster than he can pay for it.

All because he should have bought a box of runners for a few bucks.
>>
>>675753888
Rubbers*

And trips
>>
>>675733232


If that was my brother, I'd fuck him. Full homo
>>
>>675728234
You could sneak a few abortion pills in her food or drink. But please do this sooner in pregnancy. Any later and you could fuck the child's birth up which is even worse when the kid has to live with disorders because of you.
>>
>>675732721
Stop fucking using BF to say best friend. Bf stands for boyfriend, faggot
>>
>>675738563
16 is age of consent in Alabama.

Fucking a 15 year old when you are older than 17 is jail time (statutory rape) in Alabama.
>>
>>675730645
Bullshit.

Fucked my gf on the rag. That shit felt gritty and dried quick.

The fucking smell too. Never again.
>>
>>675753435
>Just turned 16 already knocked up
>Do you math?
>>
File: mugshot redneck.jpg (15KB, 453x534px) Image search: [Google]
mugshot redneck.jpg
15KB, 453x534px
I found the 16 year old pregnant girl in question.
>>
> from the South
> types, thinks and acts like an utter retard

OP confirmed for being a nigger
>>
Pertened to kill yourself and leave the state
>>
>>675754474
Oh, well then it's dicks up the ass for OP
>>
>>675754585


Sexy
>>
>>675754665
>Pertened
>>
>>675740899
This is good. Listen to this anon
>>
>>675754380
Dude, if anything the blood makes a slip and slide out of everything and it takes away from it.
>>
>>675733490
Didnt Eric Clapton sang about it?
>>
File: image_thumb[3].png (1MB, 581x772px) Image search: [Google]
image_thumb[3].png
1MB, 581x772px
>>675738014
>2016
>still being racist
Have fun raising that kid with your trailer trash girl in hickville Alabama
"Roll tide!"
>>
well what the hell does she look like? post some pics
>>
File: 1257288882987.jpg (16KB, 406x347px) Image search: [Google]
1257288882987.jpg
16KB, 406x347px
>>675736638
Damn.
>>
>>675728234
They should fucking kill you. You're 28 and she is 16. Not only that, but your best friends sister. Find the nearest bridge and jump faggot. No one will care
>>
>>675752879
Do you actually read that you dumb fucking cunt? It clearly states that you at wrong. Many mant states, ahem like alabama, have 16 as a.o.c.
>>
>675755749
>still being racist
>implying any human has ever stopped being racist
>>
>>675754585
I am kekking so fucking hard. reason its so funny is because its so fucking true. White trash whore is only keeping the baby bec. of welfare and child support laws. Keks my fucking sides out. Knew a girl (dated all my best friends) in highschool. She was suddenly pregnant like 20+times till the guy would break up with her then she would magically have a miscarrige. KEks all day long. Bitch even said to me once (no lie) "Hey anon if this doesnt work out with your best fucking friend would you ever consider marrying me?" Honest to god, I was like 17 at the time and she was probably 14. Dont fuck with them southern welfare whores. You done goofed OP.
>>
>>675729126
y'all cowards done even smoke crack?
>>
File: hqdefault.jpg (22KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]
hqdefault.jpg
22KB, 480x360px
just an hero
>>
>>675752774
What happened after you got caught?
>>
>>675756302
I dont think he did anything wrong. Fuck this kyke op, don't even trip
>>
Push her down the stairs
>>
File: 1458714360503.png (368KB, 582x359px) Image search: [Google]
1458714360503.png
368KB, 582x359px
>>675733510
Trying to figure out what "god" will do about all the war, genocide, nuclear arms, aids, Ebola, rabies, cancer, and starvation which plagues this earth...

Seems like a dick because he doesn't really do shit for anyone, Most believe in him as "god of the gaps"
>>
>>675740899
>>675744220
>>675754847
Anon here, who is trying to give best advice. Play on her selfishness. AKA
>she will never have money
>Retarded kid is super expensive
>welfare and child support wont cover it
>Can you live with that on your consience girl?
>TELL HER you are scheduling the abortion, dont ask
>She starts crying, thats when you know you hit pay dirt
>Tell her you love her and want to have a baby soon, but not right now
>Break it off as soon as she aborts
>you can brainwash that stupid cunt, just try hard, try often, and dont give up.
>>
>>675758491
Trust me 100% anon. She is not keeping this fetus for religious reasons. She is keeping for welfare and child support reasons. You can talk the whore into an abortion if you put 2 hours of planning into what you are going to say. As soon as she starts crying, you know shes considering it, then take the lead, schedule it, tell her she cant back out, force and brainwash that whore into doing it, she will, I promise. Then break all fucking contact with that southern welfare queen. Live, Profit, Dont fuck up that bad again.
>>
>>675728234
Skip town and ghost. You don't wanna go down for statutory rape.
>>
Roll tide you fucking retard lol people in the south crack me up.
>>
>>675752871
>Or just get yourself a 2D wife and an onahole and be truly safe, lonely neckbeard.

worked for me... 1 1/2 years single and loving it.
>>
>>675753888
ooo, this is bad...
trips dont lie...
>>
File: 7MKXeSc.gif (2MB, 612x639px) Image search: [Google]
7MKXeSc.gif
2MB, 612x639px
>>675759153
> loving it
is it hard to type with your lips around the barrel of that gun? #WeebLyfesMatter
>>
>>675757357
probation, sex offender list.

worst part was losing my pimp IT job. now i work in a factory with a bunch of dindus
>>
>>675754760
I cought that too, nice call.
>>
>>675729240
go to piliphines lol
asia's loli central
>>
>>675758491
Best advice right here OP. Go with this approach. And BREAK IT THE FUCK OFF AFTERWARDS. Dont go fucking with a welfare queen. I dont care how much you love her or how much you think she has changed and become an honest truthful woman. BREAK IT OFF AS SOON AS SHE ABORTS AND NEVER LOOK BACK. You done GOOFED OP. Count your losses, brainwash that whore into aborting, and never ever in ten million years ever text her, call her, or see her. You almost just got cucked hard. You wanna pay for a fucking kid of the girl whos fucking 20 guys a week? Convince her to abort, cut off all contact. If you are unsure of how to do that, re read some of my advice posts.
>>
>>675729195
This
>>
>>675729228
Gayest answer in the thread right here. Cucking oneself to an unwanted larva is not manning up, it's being a faggot. You can get out of this OP. Make it clear to the bitch that she's too young to have a kid and you'll never be a father.
>>
This story is some bullshit redneck trailer park musings of some newfag.

Rolling for tits

And Spider-Man - where is Spider-Man when you actually need him?
Thread posts: 257
Thread images: 39


[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y] [Search | Top | Home]

I'm aware that Imgur.com will stop allowing adult images since 15th of May. I'm taking actions to backup as much data as possible.
Read more on this topic here - https://archived.moe/talk/thread/1694/


If you need a post removed click on it's [Report] button and follow the instruction.
DMCA Content Takedown via dmca.com
All images are hosted on imgur.com.
If you like this website please support us by donating with Bitcoins at 16mKtbZiwW52BLkibtCr8jUg2KVUMTxVQ5
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties.
Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from that site.
This means that RandomArchive shows their content, archived.
If you need information for a Poster - contact them.