i'm just so fucking bored all the time and nothing i do makes me feel anything, i've already tried generic shit like exercising and finding new hobbies and i got with a really nice girl kind of recently, i'm only slightly better because of it
I had my 10 year old cat euthanised yesterday afternoon. She was perfectly healthy and happy until 2 days ago when she came back in to the house stumbling as though she was drunk. We took her to the vet and was told that she had ingested anti-freeze and her kidneys were failing and that she had about a day left. I brought her home because I couldn't shake the feeling that she'd somehow get better, but she didn't and now she's gone and my home is empty. Fucking cats.
>>675728022 17 in my last year of high school. i don't work, i was dealing acid for a while and that got me enough money for everything i needed, i've stopped though. i am in a relationship with her, have been for a month now, she's great but the only time she helps is if i'm actually with her, which doesn't happen much because we live so damn far away from each other. i get to see her about once a week outside of school.
Blood tests showed that she had Ethylene Glycol in her system in too large a quantity to survive, which is the deadly part of anti-freeze. I don't have a garden, only a balcony that has a planter on it. So I'm having her cremated and put into the planter along with the flowers, I guess it's some effort to keep her close to home.
I'm painfully aware of how awkward and unintelligent I am.
At least other spergs seem blissfully ignorant about their social retardation; I know that I'm mentally underdeveloped for my age (22, but it feels like I have the brain of an autistic 15 year old) yet I'm unable to change it.
I have to go into every conversation and interaction knowing that I'm going to embarrass myself, which makes me want to retreat into my room and never come out.
>got kicked out of rigid christian college for having sex >shit was cash btw 10/10 >been home a month now >economy in DC is shit so finding a job is hard >parents are constantly mad at me >bro and sis ashamed of me >all my friends at college and i dont have a car to go do shit >literally just sit at home and browse /b/ and masturbate all day.
Its not so bad, but i lost the meaning to my life it feels like. also pic related,
yup it may feel like that but it ain't true. Some tough love but you sound desperate there. Women (and men) can smell that a mile off and it is one of the most unattractive qualities. My humble advice is that you become happy being alone and by yourself. Find a hobby or interest or skill that is social and nature to build your self worth.
Once you become zen with yourself the rest will follow.
Ignore that girl you're texting. I'm sure you've probably been friendzoned at this point.
>>675730411 congrats anon. I'm very jealous because I'm not quite there myself yet. Although I start work in a couple of months and hope the regular routine, pay and constant socialisation will do me good.
>>675726812 I just got out of a relationship. I mean, it was toxic and I'm glad I don't have to deal with the faggots bullshit anymore, it my own fault for getting involved with him. But I really cared about him. Fucking sucks
I don't know what's wrong with me but I've had this depression for about a year now, it all kinda started when I dumped this girl, that's definitely not the cause of it but then she started dating some fag I knew to make me jealous. Then when that didn't work she fuckin turned him against me. At least I still have my friends, those are pretty much the words I live by but, it's just, it's been such a ruff fucking year and I can't stand it and this depression I'm in isn't making anything better and I don't know what to do.
>>675726812 I spent my entire day with my 10/10 gf. We fucked and shit was great. Yet I still feel empty on the inside. I feel like someone is holding down every one of my limbs and is torturing me by incepting depressing thoughts in to my head. I used to think if I improved my life that the voices would go away. There's no cure.
Back in July we had to put down my 15 year old cat. She ended up tearing a ligament in her back leg and couldn't walk. She stopped eating and drinking. I still feel like I pressured my mother into putting her down. Just didn't want her suffer that's all.
Just got laid off today. Shitty job so i feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and actually have positive thoughts about life. Its crazy. Any other anons have some bad but turns out to be good feels?
I'm not really sure why, my friends aren't actually friends to me They sort of exclude me from things, and sometimes really give me the feeling that they just don't like to be around me, other times we have fun I'm perfectly normal, maybe it's because I live further away from them? Maybe I'm a bigger loser than I think, so it's just out of pity? Or I don't actually have much to offer, there's more interesting people to hang out with? Either way, it sometimes feels like it would be better to not have any friends at all
I also really want to get a girlfriend, but I'm really afraid of getting rejected, I've been turned down sometimes in the past so I really don't have much confidence left It's one girl in particular I'd like to ask, but I see her almost everyday (and the hour I get to see her for is honestly all I really look forward to in my day) so it would be embarrassing for me to be around her if she says no I guess I should try to begin to get her to know me, so first I should get her number or some shit
>>675732050 I've always heard voices. My dad has always heard his name being called and told me that it's healthy for you to hear your name being called even if no one is there. These voices are different for me. They help me think, they help me solve problems, they will remind me of things, and they will talk down to me like I'm trash and should just give them full control. For some reason I can't give them the last sliver of humanity I have
I just feel this giant hole in my soul where it just sucks out the joy in my life; I constantly ask myself whats the point. I am exercising which helps but it takes forever to the point where I wonder if I will ever feel content or happy.
sounds like you should talk to your doctor about that. I would say that it's not always healthy to hear voices and it sounds like this may be something that is affecting your mood and could be a sign of something worse going on.
I'm sorry Anon. You made the right choice though, to push for her to be put to sleep. It would have been unkind to have kept her around to suffer any more. Knowing that there is no more pain is what is stopping me from sinking too low, I'm glad I was strong enough to make that decision and you shouldn't feel bad for making that same decision either. That said, it does hurt and it does cause irrational thoughts. Ohhh, the feels.
>>675733021 I had a shrink for a while, and I don't tell them that so I don't get put in to a mental asylum. I've been diagnosed with major depression, I have some kind of severe anxiety and I'm manic bipolar (all professionally diagnosed). I'm just being over dramatic today. They're always ups and downs. Just I hate the days that go well but my brain decides that it's a down kind of day. It scares me that I won't ever be able to control whether my day makes me feel good or not. I'm afraid il snap on a bad day, that I'm down and finally kill myself.
>>675726812 Everything was pretty good all in all today, actually this week was because my crush didn't come to my job to annoy me, but today just as i leave to catch the train she texts me and i dont notice..shes there and wanted to see me, mean while im on the fucking express train to bumble fuck no where away from the city. what the fuck.
>>675726812 Just feels like nothing I do is right. I'm watching as everyone I went to high school with is moving on with their lives, getting careers, having relationships/marriages, having families, etc and I'm just here...still in college (age 27), trying to get my shit together. Couldn't go to college right out of high school like everyone else, because >my grades were shit; parents didn't care about my academic well-being >parents forced me to join the military instead, from which I washed out Regardless of who 'wins' this election, I don't think I'll see the end of their term. My life is one bad day from completely FUBAR.
>Took a year off from university >Had a bad time, no friends, no gf and was not doing so good in class >Went back to school to finish degree and graduate >Decided I was going to try my hardest and actually study >Nearing the end of the semester >Burnt out >Procrastinated on a bunch of papers >Haven't even started >Scared I came back for nothing and will fail >I promised myself I would do well >I promised everyone at home I would do well >Don't know if I will do well
basically sort of tired of all this "fake friend" thing. Like my interests are completely polar opposite of them and I only enjoy being around a few. Also, an other friend pushed me out when we were good friends for a year and a half, and is sort of dick towards single people, yet we share the same friend group (my original friend group, we meet up every couple months to hang) Also, I'm like short for a guy and it basically causes anxiety when talking to girls, thinking "oh it's like super awkward that I'm shorter and not the normal" bullshit. Life isn't the best right now, but it should be better.
Look. it's clear you both like each other as more than friends because this is not how friends talk. It seems to me like your mutual disregard for wanting to be more than friends is causing a lot of trouble between the two of you, neither of you seem to really know where you stand. You both made pretty shit statements in this facebook chat, they're laughable. Neither of you seemed to be able to say exactly what it was that was affecting you, it just looks like a load of vaguely relevant bullshit. Anon, stop using facebook for this kind of stuff, head over to her and tell her exactly what and how you feel, no bullshit, because if you're trying to be friends with someone you want as more than that then the relationship is already doomed.
>be me >last year of high school >inb4 underage b&, give me 2 months >been slowly realizing over the last few years what I am to other people >I used to think that I was just a bit awkward and a little weird, but funny and not too unlikable >realizing that I'm not that at all >I'm just an unintelligent, unfunny, ugly asshole with no friends and no life >no one really likes me >I'm the least common denominator of society >can't blame them >they just like making fun of me, because I'm the walking joke >the worst part is is that I don't even realize when I'm being a prick, I just am apparently >I hate who I am, I just wish I could be anyone else or just something different
>>675736969 >even my best friend who's helped me realize a lot of this doesn't like me very much >had girlfriend for a while, she hates me now >only reason we dated in the first place is because she is a grade below me and didn't already hate me like all of my class >she sure does now though >forward to a few months after that ends >for no good reason I ask a girl to prom >tall, blonde, softball and track chick so a bit thick but that's just fine >says yes >only because it's a joke to her, I'm sure of it
>be 19 >never kissed a girl >fucked 2, had flings with others that were only sexual >never had a girlfriend >be 5'10 Manlet 218.5 pounds 3 weeks ago, started dieting and exercising so now 207.5 >be making friends and hanging with them to try to meet girls >no girls on tinder or Meetme have pulled through besides some titty pics >have no way to meet girls since my community college is full of antisocial fucks and I only have one class in person >former severe tbi >former c2 fracture >have arthritis in neck >have muscular depression at right temple >blame car accident for everything, but trying to get my life together and find happiness
>>675736967 Well, the thing is, she isn't ready for a relationship yet, she's told me this, she said that she's had a huge crush on me since the day she met me, and even when she was with her ex bf, the whole time she wanted me not him. The problem is twofold, you see, a few months back, she was raped, and it left her really messed up, and her boyfriend left her because of it. She also said, that she didn't want me to be a rebound, because they never work out, and she really wanted this to work.
I also feel like if I just showed up at her house that it would come off as creepy or stalkerish. I don't have any experience with girls, I'm 21 and she was my first kiss if that gives you any sort of Idea
>>675738230 I just make it a point to tell them that it's not something I do, and it's worked with the 5 or 6 girls I've at least gotten to 2nd base with. I want to save it for a special girl I guess. And thanks man, I want to hit 190 and just start building muscle while losing fat. I am actually getting my prereqs for a registered nursing program also.
I refused to listen when all of you said stay away from Asian/American girls. She had lesbian parents as well who hated me just for having a dick. Way too much drama with her, total bitch. She was all over me but as soon as I show feelings back she backed out. Says whatever she wanted but as soon as I do I got bitched at. Shoulda listened. She literally could get away with anything, if being an adopted asian didn't protect her ass her lesbian parents did. Fuck high school relationships though.
Because I'm handsome, and funny, fit, and caring, and never have a hard time picking up women but I have a very small dick. And nothing destroys your sense of happiness more then having someone comment on or even laugh at your little dick. Every time I get a woman to the point of taking clothes off it immediately ruins everything and I from then on I'm treated differently, with a lot less respect. So I remove them from my life but it keeps happening. Literally no esteem
I am older and I have found some success in life. Despite that, my parents still do not validate my accomplishments and I can tell they still think I am a fuckup. I am married with a kid. I feel as though my 6 year old daughter is the only one who actualy listens to anything I have to say. There are no meaningfull conversations to be found at work or within my family. I own a business, have 2 degrees, house, pool, nice car, etc, etc. but all I never satisfied or "happy". I love my wife and daughter so I will live for them but I do wish sometimes that I was all alone in this world so I could take this whole bottle of vicodine without damaging someone close to me. What's it all about anons?
I finally came out and told people that I'm depressed as all hell. I had a breakdown a few hours later and nobody even tried to check on me. When they thought I was fine they sometimes cared, but now that they know I'm not they're all cool with just letting me be alone. I hate being alone, but them not checking up on me makes me feel like they don't want to be around me
>>675726812 MY girlfriend left for a few weeks. Im a pussy People at work are trying to sabotage me to get me fired I work a shitty retail job that I heavenly rely on Even my parents won't text me back siblings planned a trip to BC without me and now my neighbours are being loud cunts and I have to work early tomorrow.
I just went and gave the ponyo (the last movie we watched together) back to my ex. Except I couldn't bring myself to see here after all this time. So I duct taped 2 baguettes, a personal pizza and a chef boyaredee can to the DVD box and threw it in her lawn. She broke it off because of my anger issues and me no longer being a fun loving person.
Okay, that puts things into perspective, but also makes things much harder to judge properly. Don't worry about looking like a stalker, it's called making an effort. Just because this world is full of utterly dysfunctional people who think everything should be done over social media, it doesn't make it so. If what you really want is to save this relationship you have to put yourself out there and make it clear that's what you want, whether it be friendship or more is for you to decide and live with. I, however, feel as though she is using you as a comfort blanket. Yes, being raped and going through hell is not something to take lightly, but it shouldn't be used as an excuse to keep people at arms length and dismiss their feelings. Your emotions are just as real as hers and it's your emotions you have to listen to and live with, so act on your emotions and not hers. You don't know when she'll be ready to be in a relationship with you, it could be weeks, months or years. It might never even happen, she might just move past you on her road to recovery and you'll be left sat out in the rain asking why. Don't let things slip by friend, tell her the truth and be totally honest. If you don't this friendship will become so bitter by the time she has recovered that there will be no chance of a good relationship.
>>675739637 Anon, nobody will love you until you love yourself. Have some pride in yourself and your accomplishments and you'll find that other peoples opinions will no longer be the goal you're striving for
I've had a pretty shitty twenty years, but my sister let me move in with her and her husband and they're helping me get back on my feet and are very patient with all my mental issues. I used to never get along with her, but now we're really good friends despite my years of absence. We watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer together and she'll be having a baby this year so I'll be an aunt . We're getting a dog while her husband is deployed too. I'm job hunting. No pressure. This is literally the first time I've felt safe and shit.
>>675739723 Depression is a battle you take on yourself, why the fuck do you want to bring other people down with you. Just deal it with it and take on the shittiness of life for awhile on your own you little roody poo faggot.
Depressed because I'm not sure if I want to continue my long distance relationship. It's been going for 3 years, and I don't see the long distance part ending anytime soon. Not sure if it's worth continuing.
The part specifically that is making me depressed is that we are a great fit, but I just don't know how much longer I can wait. Granted, I don't like how much weight she's gained in the last 2 years, and that it is one of those mildly co-dependent relationships where she drops the whole "I'd probably kill myself without you".
And I know I'm way too fucking inept socially to get another girlfriend, and she is pretty cool. I'd have to date some dumb bitch that did that stupid ass french flag facebook profile photo shit. Or is "gluten intolerant".
i have no motivation for anything, lame ass 20 year-old fucker that lives off his parents' hard earned money. I keep myself occupied with the guitar (picked it up 2 weeks ago), but eventually it'll lose its charm and i'll be bored again
my grades in school are horrible i literally dont do anything and stay inside for days on end so pretty much a lowlife. and im always sad, its a horrible feeling, whenever i think about my life i get sad and it wont go away and the only escape i have from it is sleep. im a scrawny ugly loser, and the only thing i have going good is my girlfriend who is pretty great.
>>675740512 Not bigger than that. Seriously it's pretty small. I'll have a girl all ready to go then as soon as the pants come off it turns into a nightmare. Some laugh, some come up with excuses to leave. The kinder ones will at least try but it's usully a one time deal. God can be so cruel
>>675741245 Well, this is my problem, and it may be yours as well. I have a very chubby mons pubis, and my dick looks much smaller than it actually is. Id say check out yours and decide if you should lose a few % of body fat. Another option is to get serious with a girl, and eat her out really well before she ever sees your dick.
>>675739637 It's the endless trying of being sucessfull in the end all the money in the world doesn't fix the void. Find real people real people that you can connect with go to the mountains leave society also The School Of Life teaches some shit about that.https://www.youtube.com/user/schooloflifechannel/videos
Youve got to face the problem head on dont be a coward and not do anything do Everything to find some passion or happiness.
>>675740938 I've fucked a nigger (light skinned) and she didn't flinch since I was dom'ing her. Can't act like a pussy or display any insecurity, you just have to fuck them like a whore and don't think about the size of your package.
Only mentioned fucking a nigger since you'd expect them to be the hardest to show a small/avg cock.
>>675730411 I've always ruled out the military, because I don't care to be a part of the program when it comes to war, I can't fight for shit I don't believe in.
But lately I've reconsidered slightly because of all the benefits of getting me off my ass & steady work & staying fit & shit.. I'm just cautious because I don't want to become a mindwashed faggot, I'm already too different from who I was when I was worth being..
>>675741151 it's another country. One of those deals. That's part of it too, I was much more of an introverted loser when we met. Which is partly why I'm conflicted, I feel like I'm changing as a person.
Also, another case for staying with her, I have a little dick and shes cool with it.
>>675742039 I know all the tricks man. I'll eat her out like a pro, have her basically begging for it and then....nothing. it's just small. I'm already in shape, I have 4% body fat. I've even done the relationship thing. After a short time she became completely uninterested in sex, or any sort of intimacy. Then the eyes start wandering and it's all over but the break up. It's seriously ruined my life
Im almost 17 year old male and have no sex drive. No girls to talk to, probs why No friends except for xbox fags Few good family members Cool cousin has type 1 and lost a shit ton of weight looks like a skeleton. Might die Homeschool Live in ghetto Asshole neighbors Asshole landlord Might move to washington or some shit. Dick isnt very big Overweight Bad forhead acne. Big ass bumps Even games are becoming boring. Bad fuckin BO. People in general dont like me not sure why sometimes No skill no job no opportunities Another cousin pretened to be me on xbox live to other family members and made us my fam look like dicks. No girl has shown any intrest in me in about three or four years.
>>675726812 The only two parents that actually raised me are getting way too close to death, and I cant fucking accept it. They used to be able to garden, and go to the library, and stuff, but now they just sit in their chairs, and such. Hell, I'm over here almost all day when i have nothing else that conflicts to take care of them
>>675730457 It's probably a self fulfilling prophecy You think you're keeping all this stress secret, but everyone picks up on it Most people don't care if you're smart as long as you're nice and don't annoy them When in doubt, just don't do or say anything
>>675729010 this is terrifyingly exactly what i was doing when i was 17, no such thing as stopping, next time you need money youll be right back on it. Once everybody knows you can get good gear they wont quit pestering you. Next thing you know acid is coke and your poor and burnt out by 23.
>>675744668 Looked into it. There's no real surgery than can help. You can get implants and stuff but you run serious risk of impotence. I've chalked it up as a loss. Unless someone very soon discovers a way to alter existing dna, I'm basically just fucked...or not fucked.
I'm stuck in college pursuing a degree I don't want to get a job I'll inevitably hate, surrounded by libtards with whom I don't fit in with. I just can't quit, because of how many people I'd let down. Fuck this place, dude
A bunch of crap, I started college last week, so I'm just confused and everything seems so hostile, also, 3 months ago my 10 year old dog died of cancer and I still wake up crying over some dream of him. Also, 2 weeks ago, my dad got a stroke or TIA or however you say that in english and now he's in something similar to a coma. And lastly, I'm really into some chick that's kinda like my best friend and I'm hers too, but she has a bf that's a pretty cool dude. (A beta but he's a nice guy) Also I feel like shit everyday, like there's anything to look up to or anything good that I can do (work-related, like there arent any good jobs or careers) That's about it, I guess, I have those typical teen problems too, I don't feel like I belong anywhere and stuff like that.
>tfw body finds new things to go wrong every few years, starting with a boatload at birth >tfw will probably get cancer or something and die before I'm 40, given my luck I'm not sure if I even care anymore. I guess it's an alternative to suicide.
>>675745761 Also, I don't have anyone to rely on except for that chick, I would have killed myself if it wasn't for her, really, and I don't like that, to depend on someone, like, if she knew what I felt about her and something happened I would feel like shit and I don't want her to know that she's the only one I can depend on because I don't want to force her to do stuff.
Gf just found out I'm an atheist after dating for quite awhile. We live together and I love her but now she feels differently about me. Obviously I didn't think it was going to be a big deal. I really haven't felt this depressed in months. I feel like I'm being punished for nothing. Suddenly I'm fucking garbage. Nothing has changed but now ever thing has to? What the fuck man?
>>675745337 Dont worry anon, its a tough hand to be dealt and im sorry about your last girlfriend but try not to let it get to you. I have a big fucking dick and im in decent shape but have had girls loose interest/avoid intimacy with me at times too. My point is dont loose confidence over this thing you cant change. The good news is women tend to develop intimacy through a partner with charisma and confidence, this shit can be learnt over time and will come as no problem with the right woman, power to you!
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