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Formative experiences in your love life, /b/? I'll start.

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 33
Thread images: 10

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Formative experiences in your love life, /b/?
I'll start.

>have crush on girl for 3 years in high school, 13-16
>barely ever talked to her
>she fucks a lot of guys, but only "cool" ones. never a guy like me.
>age 16, we talk for hours after school one day (no idea why, think it was just an "only two people around" thing), i make her laugh a lot, she asks if i wanna do a movie marathon
>fuck yes.jpg
>go over, she's home alone
>watch three movies, still cant get courage to kiss her
>says she's tired but i can stay if i want.
>i say no
>walks me to door
>i go for it
>kiss her goodbye
>she kisses back
>we go to her bed
>fingers in
>jerks me
>sucks me
>i say "you wanna"
>her: "I dont mind."
>i dont mind. what the fuck
>me: uh...(total virgin fag at this time, obv)
>her: you can if you want...
>me: but do YOU want?
>her: i really dont mind
>this is not how i imagined my first time with my crush
>i fuck it up beta style, pussy out.
>just say i better go
>she says bye, puts clothes back on
>i walk out
>literally havent spoken a word in the 5 years since.
>>
>>611446160

No one gives a shit about your "love life," faggot. Who are you? A nobody!

Get the fuck outta here.

/thread

sage
>>
>>611446160
>you're a fag
>you're a fag
>you're a fag
>>
>>611446270
envious virgin detected
>>
>>611446270
dont /thread yourself, dumbass. and dont say sage unless youre actually going to sage.
i gotchu, OP.
>>
i literally came back to /b/ 1 day ago and i remember seeing this shit 6 years ago


time for me to leave again
>>
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>>611446270
>/threading oneself
Not the first time I've made this thread, friendo. You get some great stories in here from all over.

Here's another
>dating girl, age 16
>lose virginity to her
>she lives about an hour's drive away
>see each other every weekend, fuck like rabbits
>after about 3 months we get a hotel for my birthday
>she leaves me in hotel to relax while she goes and picks up dinner
>leaves her phone
>dontmindifido.jpg
>reading her texts
>see sexting with some other guy
>she comes home
>i dont tell her what I read
>we eat pizza and fuck some more
>i go home next day....throw sim card away and get new number
>haven't heard from her since
>>
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>>611446160
fuck man i really feel for you. look at it this way you got a handjob and a bj so things could be worse.

btw your a faggot.
>>
>>611446160
I was 20 and talked a 17 yr old to coming to my house after prom. My uncle drank my booze so when she got there we had nothing to get loose. we talked and fell asleep.
>>
>>611446645
I fucked my friends older wife , I was 20 she was 30. She cheated om him with me for a month before getting pregnant and marrying him
>>
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>age 17
>at party
>hot chick, flirting with me
>party quiets down, a few of us left
>watching movie
>we're spooning on lounge
>start rubbing her stomach, playing with her hands, etc.
>about to go for the kiss
>bunch of jocks arrive, laugh at us for all winding down, tell us party is just starting
>music back up loud
>girl gets up
>she's dancing with them
>ends up fucking one in one of the bedrooms
>i just walk home.
>>
>>611447029
but who was father?
>>
>be me
>girl invites me over for sex
>don't go
>>
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>>611447063
>>
>>611446270
Better start loosing that weight fgt and maybe just maybe you'll get a chance kinda like that
>>
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>be 20
>date girl for a bit casually, not too serious
>asks me to come over and fuck her brains out on the weekend
>say yes, obv.
>ex calls me, broken up with her new bf, wants to come over and "talk" on the weekend. I say yes.
>text current girl im dating and say i have a poker game i forgot about
>fuck my ex all night
>girl emails me with a picture of some guy at a party and says she fucked him that night because i wouldnt, and she doesnt want to see me again
>i reply with "Lol, I don't even play poker. :-)"
>she replies, i delete the email without reading
>felt like a boss.
>>
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>mate invites me over for drinks
>just me, him, and some hot chick friend of his
>we all get drunk
>he passes out
>chick kisses me
>mfw im getting lucky tonight
>chick goes to toilet
>i go afterwards
>she's left a massive shit sitting in the toilet
>i piss over the top and flush
>doesnt flush
>goddamit
>grab toilet brush and prod, keep trying to flush
>doesnt happen
>hear guy friend wake up and say he needs to piss
>she says im in here
>fuck, they're going to think its my fucking shit that cant flush
>in drunken stupor grab toilet paper and try and force it down
>try not to gag or get shit on my hand
>finally flushes
>wash hands very fucking thoroughly
>he goes in afterwards
>says it fucking stinks in there
>they both laugh at me
>mfw it was her goddamn fucking shit
>did not get laid, obv.
>>
>>611446429
>>611446481
>>611447161
all the guys defending their /b/ro
i love this place
>>
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>21 years old (last year)
>working at carnival
>showbag sales
>work the 9 days, get 2k cash in hand at end, sweet deal.
>reasonably attractive chick working with me
>hot, but in a dirty, used sort of way. I'm sure you all know the type. very redneck, chain-smoking, drug-doing, etc.
>she's into the suburban derelict sort, larger tradie sort of fellows, i'm not really her type
>week ends, all the workers swap facebooks and phone numbers
>get naked photo texted from her
>"oops wrong number lol"
>next day "did you like what you saw"
>we end up going to movie
>awkward as fuck movie, very little touching each other
>go home
>texts me next day
>just straight up asks me to come over and fuck her
>i go over
>like six of her friends just hanging out with her in living room
>offer me a drink
>they're all just chatting, she's barely talking to me at all
>just sitting and drinking beer by myself in corner
>eventually she comes over and takes me by my hand, takes me to her bedroom
>all them just laughing and cheering from living room
>get hard, she starts sucking me
>one of them walks in with camera laughing
>i cover up, she's just there, shamelessly nude, laughing.
>eventually they all leave
>she's acting like nothing happened, pulls out some coke, offers me some
>i'm way out of my comfort zone just fucking staring at her
>she does her line of coke and then puts her clothes back on, walks out of room
>i'm just there naked like wut
>put my clothes back on
>walk into living room
>everyone gone except one of the girls
>tells me they've all gone to get more alcohol, offers to make out with me
>i'm like no thanks
>>
>>611447802
>in drunken stupor grab toilet paper and try and force it down
>try not to gag or get shit on my hand
my sides
>>
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last one
>be at nightclub
>newly single
>see girlfriend grinding with guy
>making out heavily
>icanhandlethis.exe
>she starts rubbing his crotch, groping it
>nope.jpg
>go to toilet
>door lock goes in, but the thing is smashed up and barely holding it closed
>pull pants down, sit on toilet
>dont even need to shit, just sit there
>think about ex, get depressed.
>miss her sex
>decide to rub one out for old time's sake
>pull out my phone
>3g some porn
>start jerking it
>loud bang from outside, staggering noises
>8/10 bursts into cubicle, knocks flimsy lock out of socket
>I sit back and spread my legs just in time, holding my dick up and out of the way
>she vomits into toilet between my legs
>none gets on me
>i hand her my drink to wash her mouth out
>she swishes it around in her mouth, drinks it all
>says thanks
>rests head on my bare legs
>sees my hard-on
>she's obviously wasted
>starts jerking me, sucking me
>I feel her tits a little
>she makes me cum
>swallows it all
>stands up, walks out
>i'm just sitting there with my pants down on a toilet filled with vomit, just finished cumming in an 8/10's mouth
>>
>>611448677
If she vomits at a nightclub she is surely not a 8/10
>>
>>611449624
what kind of arbitrary rule is that?
>>
>>611449831
This girl is obv. trash so she can't be one of the most atractive around
>>
>>611449975
by that logic the virgins would be the hottest around. if they were that hot, someone wouldve fucked them.
the hot chicks are the ones who get offered the booze and drugs, and get trashy.
they only get less attractive than the sweet and innocent ones after like 25-30
>>
>>611448677
>>611448312

lmfao
>>
>>611449624
>if you've ever vomited at a nightclub you're a 7/10 or lower
kbro. You clearly have a lot of life experience under your belt.
>>
>Had a girlfriend in highschool
>We had a lot of sex at school
>A lot
>Very first voyeur experience was when she pushed my into a broom closet under my auditorium and gave me a beej
>We were at it for a full class time (roughly an hour)
>It was the hottest thing of all time

Real talk, she couldn't even finish me with her mouth. I had to do that shit with my hand (Though she did insist of me busting in her mouth) but that didn't stop it from being my favourite sexual experience so far. I don't think blowjobs are that great as far as the sensation goes, but there is just something crazy hot and erotic about a girl wanting your dick into her mouth.
>>
>>611451558
>voyeur
I do not think it means what you think it means.

>she couldn't even finish me with her mouth. I had to do that shit with my hand
I have only once ever had a girl finish me entirely with her mouth. It was amazing.

Don't get me wrong, I've had girls jerk me off without me helping, but as far as actual blowjobs go, they've always had to use their hands. Except that one glorious occasion.
>>
>>611446645
That's some alpha shit bro. Congrats
>>
>>611450417
Dude your standards are fucking low, were you beat as a child or something?
>>
>>611453061
Not that guy but it's nothing to do with standards.
Saying you know how attractive someone is without seeing the person is retarded.
All girls who drink too much alcohol are ugly?
Really? What are you basing that on?
>>
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>>611447449

i fucking lost at ":-)"
great one
Thread posts: 33
Thread images: 10


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