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Let's have some fun /b/. So I made a fake Tumblr for lulz,

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 256
Thread images: 59

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Let's have some fun /b/.
So I made a fake Tumblr for lulz, said I identify as a couch, I am furniturekin, proceeded to do some posting about otherkin blah blah
Now they're threatening to dox me, they're rustled. Eternally. Get in here and let's have a good raid.
>TLDR Tumblr is mad
>>
>>609721647

>Tumblr is mad
>The sun is burning
>Rabbits are fucking
>OP is a fag

That's what Tumblr is there for. For people to gather around and get mad and find new and exciting things to be mad at.
>>
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Bump for interest
>>
They tried to dox me and showed me to be about 600 miles from my actual location
>>
The fire rises. They want me to kill myself for "mocking otherkin" kek
>>
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Mocking otherkin? Can you mock a joke?
>>
>>609722467
Have you claimed that they are unjustly opressing you? tell them that you were born as furniture in a human body and that if they don't like that they're no better than the kkk.
>>
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Gotchu with da reblog
>>
>Shitty fake tumblr accounts.
Oh boy, I bet no-one has done this before.
>>
>>609722731
Yes you have to lash back for hating a lifestyle you didn't choose you were born furniturekin you didn't choose this and then blow the situation way out of proportion you need to add triggers
>>
>>609722886
If ya don't like it the you can GET OUT
>>
>>609722826
Thanks kek
>>609722731
Every message I claim they are furniturist MRA's, see they're trying to dox me but here's the fun part. I'm a cross country truck driver posting from a phone, I've been in 3 states just today. They're confused lol
>>
>>609722826
>chairself
>>
bump for interest
>>
bump come on nigga
>>
Here she is. The doxer, sxlemwxtch. She mad
>>
>>609723817
>tumblr female doxer
> kek
>>
Where are they getting information about you from?
>>
Here's the dox threat. Still waiting on a response. I swear fucking with this site is too easy.
>>
>>609723997
Not sure anon, ima be honest I know nothing about doxing and I haven't bothered to proxy my android. So I'm sure there's a way, I couldn't care less if they found my address or other sites though, what's the worse they can do? Send a privelege check pizza to my house? Kek
>>
Anon, dont, there is no point.
These tumblrtards, legitimately enjoy feeling vicitimized or 'insulted'.

Their personalities are kind of like some sort of a cross-breed between internet trolls and online religous activists.
>>
>chairself
Kek
>>
>>609724055
Kek
Someone dox that silly bitch
>>
Here's the post that triggered them and caused feels. Well, one of them
>>
>>609722267
>>609722267
>>609722267
Spokane?
>>
>>609724909
I was nowhere near Spokane that's the funny part. I was going through FUCKING NEVADA when that was posted.
>>
Here's my profile/blog or whatever u call it, tell me how THIS could offend so many snowflakes..
>>
>>609725420
kek
>>
What you do is take screenshots, and go to tumblr with uploaded screenshots and tell them they are cyber bullying you, and use he tags #Cyberbullying #signalboost #Signal boost #Hatecrime #Furniturekin
>>
>>609725420
>Stain resistant
Lel
>>
OP here What should I post or do next for maximum kek?
>>
>>609725781
this
>>
>>609725781
That's is actually a really good idea, I'm a victim too, my identity is no less important than any other.
>>
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>>609725420
>>
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>>609725420
>stain resistant
>chairself

Doing god's work op...
>>
>>609725420
Can someone explain why the ugly girl in the picture cares where this furniture person is located?
>>
How did they fail dox you?
>>
get nudes of female doxer blackmail her
>>
>>609725781
This.
>>
dox her back faggot
>>
The fire rises. I'm being bullied and harassed guise.
>>
>>609725993
For dox newfriend
>>
>>609721647
How do I reply to her shit

>new to tumblr
>>
>>609726587
KEK
>>
>>609726618
Reblogging it with your reply.
>>
>>609726617
how do you dox?
>>
>>609725993
Probably a teenager that 'identifies' with some group on tumblr..
>>
>>609726587
Good work.
>>
>>609726784
first you need to delete system 32
>>
>>609721956
Sounds an awful lot like a certain imageboard.
>>
We need to raise furniturekin awareness. Make furniturekin accounts. We identify as tables, chairs, pull out sofas and loveseats. We are united. We are stain resistant and vintage. We are furniturekin
>>
>>609725420
mad lel. getting roommate to look into furniturekin now. she's a tumblr.
>>
>>609727178
I call water bed
>>
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>>609726747
>>
>>609727348
4chan and tumblr living under the same roof, wtf?!
>>
I am sofakin
>>
If you're a chair, can I sit on your face?
#TRIGGERED
>>
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>>609725420
Top bur /b/rother
>>
>>609727637

I see where you're going with this
>>
>>609727389
Go fuck bedself
I wanted that one
>>
>>609721647
  
  
  
please bump my thread >>>/s4s/3270464



    

  



  



  

     


  
                       









       


    
  
  
  
  
>>
>>609727744

>kek'd and check'd
>>
>>609727637
As long as you don't start stoolkin him like sxlemwxtch.
>>
>>609727955
no
>>
>>609728000
Checked.
>>
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>>609727955
>>
>>609727905
That makes one of us
>>
Sofakin tired of this...
>>
OP here, got another one butthurt. She's bullying and triggering me
>>
>>609721647

I am Mohammad-kin. You have my Allahuckbar bother
>>
>>609728316
clever
>>
>>609726948
Kekkingtons
>>
>>609728316
Topkek
>>
>>609727495
we butt heads. a lot. but all and all she's a good person. she used to spit the "70 cents on the dollar" propaganda at me until I showed her the credited articles and source data. got it here, of course. she hasn't mumbled it once since then. got something else from here about how modern teachers are actually skewing male grades. she was a teacher for a year. got two articles and the source paper for her to read. she hasn't read it yet because she is afraid of the truth, I think. she likes to believe that women generally have it worse in all walks of life. my goal is to slowly convert her to the truth.
>>
>>609726587
Did she just refer to otherkin as "mentally ill children"? TRIGGER WARNING! STOP TRIGGERING ME!

Say something like "how dare you call otherkin mentally ill, our lifestyle is just as valid as yours"
>>
>>609728257
>>609728316

>sofakin
>existence implied
>never use "to be"

"Sofakin angry"
"Sofakin scared"
"Sofakin horny"

etc, etc
>>
>>609728703
Good point. We have so much ammo against this cunt.
>>
>>609728845
kek
>>
>>609728703
Good catch. This.
She just invalidated her whole wite nite campaign.
>>
As sofakin one of my triggers is rick James, because fuck yo couch is rape
>>
>>609721647
>furniturekin
cupkeks
>>
>>609728975
#rapeculture
>>
>>609728975
lelel
>>
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>>609728975
>>
>reclinerkin joins the battle

Started messaging sxlemwctch or whatever the fuck her name is
>>
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>>609728000
Nice trips
>>
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bump... gotta watch this.
>>
>>609729140
This... free the sofakin from #rapeculture an#fartrape
>>
I'm jumping in this. I identify as a bowl of soup. Campbell's clam chowder. Its hard being soup :'(
>>
>>609729455

Ask her why she uses "x" to cross out the vowels; are vowels an oppressive invention of the patriarchy?
>>
>>609729455
>>
I am smegmakin

I just cba tumblring

Smegman/smegme/smegself

(y) xD
>>
>>609729673
bump for mass trolling.
>>
>>609729673
Kek

>Faggot can't even come up with an original idea
>"i'll join the tumblr club"

Fuck off you degenerate faggot, go bait the 13 year old tumblr girls
>>
>>609729667
Kek
>>
>>609729667
This..... very much x is labeled the female sex chromosome, x also marks the spot.... the wet spot where women as sex objects should always sleep
>>
report them for harrassment
>>
And please: some furniturekin identify as "gender mayonnaise"
>>
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Do something funny...
>>
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>>609729936
>>
>>609730065
Reblogging all her shit and call her out for bullying otherkin and calling them mentally ill as well
>>
She's doxkin
In all levels except physical, i can dox
[Dox]
>>
>>609729936
This is cyber bullying and it's not okay.
4chan is a safe space, okay?
>>
>>609730142
Fucking this
>>
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>>609730280
Of course it is
>>
>>609730193
nypa
>>
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>>609730265
>>
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>>609727431
Dem Jimmies...
>>
>>609730233
checked
>>
>>609730280
Nigga cyber bullying ain't real

Fucking turn off yo screen
>>
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>>
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>>609730265
>>
>>609730707
>>
>>609726101
Anyone who seriously occupies their time with tumblr usually is too stupid to even know how to pull up a command besides copy and paste
>>
How do we report sxlemwxtch?
>>
>>609730565
Thats like saying women need to learn self defence. Society should stop teaching men to rape.
#rapeculture #bullyculture #signal boost #signalboost #Dr. Who
>>
>>609726784
Turn off your computer and go to bed. Then don't go on your pc for a few days.
>>
>>609726101
He said earlier he's in a truck, so I guess by the time they've found anything he's already far away from that location.
>>
>>609731138
Exactly. I'm moving at 60 mph so any dox they attempt is gonna fail.
Also, cocs wants to play..... spamming my inbox with shitposts
>>
>>609731426
this is cocs....
>>
>>609731498
This has potential....
>>
>>609731498
yuppp
>>
>>609725420
TOP KEK

Gold


>>609725781
This
Report it even
>>
>>609730565
I identify as monitorkin and this post has triggered me.
>>
>>609721647
>Load up skyrim
>Proceed to listen to introduction
>Dovahkin
>wtf.jpg
>Ring up Bethesda, tell them that I'm a furniturekin and not this mysogynistic 'Dovahkiin' and threaten to boycott all their products
>The patriachy loving man on the other end starts laughing and I have an anxiety attack. He can only hear my extremely heavy breathing and become artificially concerned. (We know men cannot feel concern for women, only enjoyment at their suffering which is why they are scum)
>'Ma'am are you okay? Do I need to call the paramedics'
>'No you cis male scum, taking my rights to my healthcare away from me as well as my personal identity of being a furniturekin'
>Hang up the phone and cry for three hours straight
>Microwave disc and cause a house fire
>Blame Bethesda for triggering me and have the support of many fellow tumblrs
>They release ESO which allows you to be any kin you want.
>But there are only binary gender options
>Triggered.png
>Boycott products until TES VI comes out.
>>
HERE GOES OP BEING A FUCKING FAGGOT AGAIN
>>
>>609732323
#triggered
>>
>>609732323
#triggered
>>
>>609732323
#triggered
>>
>>609732323
#triggered
>>
>>609732323
#triggered, times three
>>
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OP here, thanks for the keka so far bros, any ideas on how to get the shit storm really kicking?
>>
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I identify as reloading kin. Take this an do what you must /b/ros
>>
>>609724055
>I want everyone to hate him
>they can't prove he's NOT a pedophile
>>
>>609733240
She also can't prove that it was me who beat her lol.
>>
>>609733203
Meant 10:54 AM sorry, posting in a moving truck isn't easy as it seems
>>
If we get enough furniturekin you guys should open up one of those blogs or whatever they fucking are to explain what are furniturekin so people take it seriously and actully join.
>>
>>609733203
That writing...

Do you have parkinsons disease?
>>
>>609725420
Kek good work OP
>>
>>609733683
That moving truck he's clearly writing one-handed in...

Do you have eyeballs?
>>
>>609733779
No but I have a hella lotta smegma

SMEGGMAN
>>
>>609730193
How can they think identifying as fucking neptune is legit but being a sofa isn't?? #doublestandards
>>
>>609734058
>implying tumblrinas have rational thoughts anyway
>>
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>>609733683

MFW his writing while in a truck is neater than mine normally.
>>
>>609732323
#Niggered
>>
Haha yogaokiedokie is tep kok bra
>>
I really want to flood tumblr with Monitorkin, Waterbottlekin and shit like that.

If you identify as another gender you're retarded enough, much less a fucking skunk or whatever the fuck those idiots rag on about.

>come at me tumblrfags so obviously lurking
>>
I'm lurkin
>>
>>609734866
Nice dubz, check'd

Yeah, I wish the tumblrinas and tumblrfags would come out and play. Would be nice.
>>
>>609734426
True true
>>
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Otherkin

Someone needs to add a furniturekin section.
>>
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>>609734426
Pic related, 99.9% of Tumblr Tards.
>>
Well here's a good place to start. Let's flood this blog with our uncommon kin types.
Yes this blog is real. Go check it.
>>
How do these tumblr users manage to dox people? It's not like they're elite hackers
>>
>>609735174
THE EDITS ON THAT FUCKING WIKI

>KEK KUK KOKKITY KOO
>>
>>609735174
>It's literally autism
>>
Based truck driver in on the tumblr lulz, OP is a legend
>>
>>609735174
>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Otherkin
>BRANCH OF AUTISM
HAHAHAHAHA
>>
>>609729666
fucking satan trying to convince us that he's just a harmless bowl of soup. ain't nobody falling for that you silly devil you.

>captcha: whatral right
>>
Bumping for great injustice

>where are all the shit-tier butthurt Tumblrinas?
>>
I'm looking through this thread and I have a question what the fuck is a kintype??
>>
>>609723817
/b ros. Here's the latest I have found on our new Tumblr Friend "Neptune":
instagram: @likes_space and snapchat: anasayshey

Do your worst!

inb4 NYPA
>>
>>609735904
A mental illness
>>
>>609735944
Nice doubles
>>
>>609735975
What kind of mental illness?
>>
>>609735944
Dubz do speak truth. Get to it!
>>
>>609736098
People on tumblr thinking they are not human, for example wolves, planets or in OP's case; furniture
>>
"Don't tell me I'm asking to be sat on!"

#rapeculture
>>
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>>609735174
>branch of autism
>largely based on attention seeking
>>
>>609730707
>>609730873
fucking dead #topkek2012

>rattles
>>
>>609736260
THIS
>>
>>609736098
A really american one.
>>
>>609735944
I'll be damned. Screenshit your damage anons.
>>
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>>609736257
Are you fucking serious?
>>
>>609736366
>Only in america
Fuckin' yanks
>>
>>609736462
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Otherkin
>>
>>609727124
Kek
>>
>>609736391
Silly bitch thinks she can DOX, goddamnit I was DOX'n when she was still shitting on herself and taking milk from a tit.

Tell them lurkin tumblrtards to get on my fucking lvl
>>
>>609736098
It's basically when retards believe that they are genuinely a reincarnation something else. Like OP is pretending he is part-furniture, some autists think they are part-dragon or dog or whatever.
>>
>>609736602
DOX her then faggot
>>
>>609735944
Here's her (sxlemwxtch) IG guys. Use her photo map to see her location
>>
>>609736602
bumpin other anon's post. Easy, peasy...BITCH

http://sxlemwxtch.tumblr.com/about
>>
Not really sure where to go from here
>>
>>609736730
4got image sry
>>
>>609736730
I'm on it.
>>
>>609736516
Oh Jesus Fucking Christ
>>
>>609736854
Yeah and I think it's worsened by the fact that no one takes them seriously, well except other Tumblr users that relate to that "state of mind" They tell stories that resemble a bedtime tale a mongoloid moron or severely autistic twit would write.
>>
>>609736811
These fucking 14 year olds are too brave
>>
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bumppp
>>
>>609736811
She looks like her parents don't talk to her often and that her peers at school are absolute fucking retards. Anyone who tries to talk sense to her would be replied with "OH YOU'RE JUST A TROLL & NEED 2 STFU"
>>
>>609736811
This bitch is ugly. 4/10 would regret licking her butt
>>
>>609737304
More like too naive
>>
>>609737366
checked, and kek'd
>>
>See also Autism
>Top Kek
>>
>>609737218
I'm not really one to judge but if you think you're something else besides human you've got a real fucking problem.
>>
>>609725420
Lmao
>>
>>609737760
>Furry lifestyler
>More top kek
>>
>>609725781
This
>>
>>609732323
#triggered
>>
>>609737789
It should be treated as a legit mental disorder. I mean I'm sure the majority of the people on Tumblr do it for the attention (just like hardcore Catholics pretend to speak in tongues so they feel like they fit in and shit) but if people genuinely think they are something that's not human, there's something very wrong with their brain.
>>
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Call the authorities on her lolol
>>
>>609732323
>>
>>609730885
I know chicks who only look up porn gifs and that kinda shit on tumblr, or participate in #ToplessTuesday. It's not a about special snowflake faggots
>>
>>609726587
Kek
>>
>>609738077
Charge your phone you fucking nigger
>>
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Kek
>>
Wow been while since having several keks in one thread

Thanks OP
>>
>>609738032
It should. Jesus and I thought I had some problems
>>
>>609728349

BDP?

Borderline Dersonality Pisorder?
>>
>>609738096
I don't use Tumblr, but to my understanding its a pretty huge website with a really broad variety of people. This whole SJW-otherkin-retard shit is just one of the communities it's home to.
>>
>>609736516
Holy fuck Ahahaha
>>
>>609735852
I almost died when I saw that
>>
>>609738398
It seems to house a lot of autism. More autism than you would see in /b/
>>
Don't use tumblr and am to lazy to learn it, but gj op many lulz were had.
someone screencaping this shit?
>>
>>609738257
top kek, almost spit out my coffee
>>
>>609738588
Oh yeah plenty of autists, but different types of autists. The ones we tend to target represent just one community of the tumblr autists.
>>
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HAHAHAHAHA
>>
>>609738730
Fortunately we just have one type of autism. Tumblr, well is a plague of autism
>>
>>609738812
>judaism
kek
>>
>>609738812
Ultra top maximum kek
>>
>>609725940
Kia Stahp.
>>
>>609721647

Sorry OP I really want to help out, but always get real mad when reading their shit. It just won't work out, though I wish you good luck.

Peace out #1
>>
that wikipedia page... my god, I love you guys
>>
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kekagge
>>
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This is a good thread. OP is not a faggot.
>>
>>609727178
This, I'm in
>>
>>609728686
God's work. If you get more stories, make a thread.
>>
Where's those lurking autistic tumblrtards that were ITT earlier?
>>
>>609725420
Goddammit /b/ this is the hardest I've laughed in awhile. My sides are currently on vacation in another universe.
>stain resistant
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Thank you OP for allowing me to realize that I'm furniturekin.

Captcha fealt
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>>609725420
>stain resistant
fucking got me
>>
>>609740246
kekus maximus!
>>
Someone is fixing all the wiki edits, but they missed the Joe Laycock reference.

>my fucking SIDES
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>Jews
>furniture
kek
>>
>>609733203
Find out where she lives and then drive your truck through her front door while hauling furniture.
>>
Need a new bread, b4 404!

OP - Where are you? Pull the truck over damnit!
>>
fuckin wiki's been fixed. cunts
>>
>>609740726
THIS OP
>>
Oh my fucking shit we need to start a furniture kin movement
>>
MFW, Autisticly being more autistic than these Tumblr-fags makes my nose bleed.
>>
>>609730193
Send dick pics to the Snapchat
>>
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>>609737305
>>
>>609740750
OP here I haven't left yet, stick around, tonight I'll make a new thread with my new blog, VeggieKin, I sexually identify as cauliflower. I'll make a new thread
>>
>>609725781
This so much
>>
>>609741053
You better fucking deliver, I'll be here
>>
>>609722826
/orochimarusel/

my sides... 10/10
>>
>>609740726
THIS THIS THIS
>>
http://cookieandstuph.tumblr.com/post/93805779181/im-furniturekin-i-identify-as-a-chair-becuse-i

relevent. 2014
>>
See also
>Jet Fuel
>Beams
>>
>>609738388
The dsm no longer calls it borderline. There is now a spectrum called "unstable personality disorder" in it's place.

These idiots who self diagnose aren't doing it from updated material....if Any material at all.
>>
>>609725420
This. XD
>>
>>609740700
Fucking christ, laughing to tears right now
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>>609727178
tables, chairs, pull out sofas and loveseats

holy shit dude, where are the real challenges??!

I identify as a 19th century ceramic tile stove
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>>609728845

underrated post
>>
>>609740700
Thread posts: 256
Thread images: 59


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