jokes thread: i start whats worse than finding a worm on an apple?

bumperino spaghtino

whats worse than spilling coffee all over your newspaper?
>niggers

>>609206230
OP isn't lonely!! lol!! roflcopter!!!

>>609206426
>>609206485
thanks gais keep bumping
whats the hardest thing of seeing a kid being killed?
>my dick

What has a short dick, and fucks it's own mom?
>OP

File: 10985178_460620110752835_2646708543816224331_n.jpg (3KB, 141x103px) Image search: [Google]

3KB, 141x103px

>how do you get a jewish girls number??
pull up her sleeve

>>609206792
:D
thanks lori

What does a baby look like after a minute in the microwave?

I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.

>>609207008
kek

What's worse than winning the Special Olympics?

Being in the Special Olympics!

>>609207122
Something tells me you fucked it up

This bloke is a joke
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpNbo1PDaTw

how does they celebrate a child´s firts birthday on africa?
>putting flowers on their grave

how long can a nigress keep a shit?
>9 months

why jews watch porn backwards?
>because they like tha part when the hookers gives the money to the protagonist

bumperino spaghetino

why muslims girls dont talk during sex?
>because they are not allowed to talk to strangers

>>609207270
You are correct Sir. worse = better

anyone lurking?
we need you to contriboot

>dank memes

3 bumps more

why do black people have white palms?
theres good in every human

>>609207270
Referring to another thread; if I had LSD, I would not be drinking and we would not have this problem. XD (This F*&^ing Captcha thinks that 1/2 a rack of ribs is a steak! Fucking Gay!)

What do you call a nigger with a peg leg?
Shit on a stick! -joe

Why do niggers always have sex on their minds?
Because they have pubes on their heads! -Bo

What does Pontiac stand for?
Poor Old Nigger Thinks It's A Cadillac! -ricky

Did you hear the one about . .
. . the baby nigger who went to heaven and got his wings? He said, "God! Look! I'm an angel!", and God said, "No you stupid nigger! You're a bat, now eff off!"

I like black people . . .
. . I used to have some black friends 'till my dad sold them!

What does a nigress and an ice hockey player have in common?
They both change their pads after 3 periods! -ashmoor

Why do blacks have white hands and feet?
They were on all fours when God spray painted them!

Why do black people have white hands?
They were up against the wall when God spray painted them!

Why do black people have white hands?
Everyone has some good in them! -bonz

Why do black people have white hands?
It rubs off the cop cars! -bonz

Why do more niggers get hit by cars in the winter?
They're easier to spot! -brenden

What do you call two blacks on one bike?
Organized crime! -bobo

Why are niggers getting stronger?
T.V.s are getting bigger! -tim

>>609208625
kek

how do you make a little girl cry twice?
rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

What's the best part about fucking a 4 year old girl in the shower?
slicking her hair back and pretending she's a boy

how the muslim boy knew his father raped his sister?
>his dick tasted like blood

what would you call the flintstones if they were black?

>niggers

>>609209060
Thank you www.deadbabyjokes.com

>>609209406
topkek

bumperino

>knock knock
who's there
>the Holocaust

>two guys walk into a bar
>the Holocaust

>>609209796
anne frankek

cheers

4 guys drive to a church
>its the holocaust

>why did the nigger cross the road
>the Holocaust

hitler really enjoyed it
>the holocaust

>it's the police mam your son was killed by a hit and run driver the driver was the Holocaust

dank memes
>the holocaust

> family goes to see a talent agent and says they have the best idea for an act
>talent agent says describe the act to me
>the Holocaust

ITT
>the holocaust

>A priest, a rabbit and Mohammed
>the Holocaust

an Irish man walks out a bar

two people talk about shit
>the holocaust

Three couples went in to see the minister to see how to become members of his church. The minister said that they would have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and tell him how it went.
The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle-aged and the final couple was newlywed.
Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister. The retired couple said it was no problem at all. The middle-aged couple said it was tough for the first week, but after that, it was no problem. The newlyweds said it was fine until she dropped the can of paint.
"Can of PAINT!" exclaimed the minister.
"Yeah," said the newlywed man. "She dropped the can and when she bent over to pick it up I had to have her right there and then. Lust took over."
The minister just shook his head and said that they were not welcome in the church.
"That's okay," said the man. "The Holocaust."

Late one night a man is driving down the road, speeding quite a bit. A cop notices how fast he is going and pulls him over. The cop says to the man, "Are you aware of how fast you were going?"

The man replies, "Yes I am. I'm trying to escape a robbery I got involved in."

The cop gives him a skeptical look and says, "Were you the one being robbed?"

The man casually replies, "No, I committed the robbery."

The cop looks shocked that the man admitted this. "So you're telling me you were speeding...AND committed a robbery?"

"Yes," the man calmly says. "I have the loot in the back."

The cop begins to get angry. "Sir, I'm afraid you have to come with me." The cop reaches in the window to subdue the man.

"Don't do that!" the man yells fearfully. "I'm scared you will find the gun in my glove compartment!" The cop pulls his hand out. "Wait here," he says.

The cop calls for backup. Soon cops, cars, and helicopters are flooding the area. The man is cuffed quickly and taken towards a car. However, before he gets in, a cop walks up to him and says, while gesturing to the cop that pulled him over, "Sir, this officer informed us that you had committed a robbery, had stolen loot in the trunk of your car, and had a loaded gun in your glove compartment. However, we found none of these things in your car."

The man replies, "Yeah, the Holocaust."

I don't really know if I am gay, because I have never tried penis. It's like when I was I kid, I said I didn't like vegetables. Well, I had never tried vegetables. Now that I am older, I have tried vegetables, and I really like them... Maybe it's the same with cock? Statistically I am gay! Because I have only ever played with one penis, mine. But I FUCKING LOVED IT! I HAVEN'T STOPPED PLAYING WITH IT SINCE! I like 100% of penises I have ever played with, but I only like about 60% of the vaginas I have been in.

>>609211581
kek

>Me chinese
>me pray joke
>me put pepe
>the Holocaust

There were three restauraunts on the same block. One day one of them put up a sign which said "The Best Restaurant in the City."
The next day, the largest restaurant on the block put up a larger sign which said "The Best Restaurant in the World."
On the third day, the smallest restaurant put up a small sign which said "The Holocaust."

>>609210177
old school; i like it

I see where this is going.... I don't know if I am gay. "The Holocaust!"

Put a mattress in the pool.
It usually takes the Holocaust.

>>609213224
>crane
>Holocaust

An American lawyer invited a Czechoslovakian friend to stay with him in his mountain cabin. Early in the morning, the lawyer and his Czechoslovakian friend went out to pick berries for their morning breakfast. As they were picking blueberries, along came two big Bears - a male and a female.
The lawyer, seeing the two bears, climbed a tree.
His friend wasn't so lucky and the male bear caught him and swallowed him whole.
The lawyer drove his car to town as fast has he could to get a policeman. The policeman took his gun and ran to the berry patch with the lawyer.
Sure enough, the two bears were still there. "He's in THAT one!" said the lawyer, pointing to the male.
The policeman looked at the bears, took careful aim with his gun, and SHOT THE FEMALE.
"What did you do that for!" shouted the lawyer, "I said he was in the other bear!"
"Exactly," answered the policeman. "Would YOU believe a lawyer who told you that the Czech was in the Male?"
(The check is in the mail.)
>the Holocaust

>nigger
>the Holocaust

What did Delaware?
>the Holocaust

A little old lady wanted to join a biker club. She knocked on the door of a local biker club and a big, hairy, bearded biker with tattoos all over his arms answered the door. She proclaimed, "I want to join your biker club." The guy was amused and told her that she needed to meet certain biker requirements before she was allowed to join. So the biker asked her, "You have a bike?" The little old lady said, "Yea, that's my Harley over there," and points to a Harley parked in the driveway. The biker asked her, "Do you smoke?" The little old lady said "Yea, I smoke. I smoke 4 packs of cigarettes a day and a couple of cigars while I'm shooting pool." The biker is impressed and asked, "Well, have you ever been picked up by the Fuzz?" The little old lady said, "No, I've never been picked up by the fuzz, but I've burned Jews in an oven."

A woman went to doctors office. She was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out, screaming as she ran down the hall. An older doctor stopped and asked her what the problem was, and she explained. He had her sit down and relax in another room. The older doctor marched back to the first and demanded, "What's the matter with you? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old, she has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?" The new doctor smiled smugly as he continued to write on his clipboard. "The Holocaust though, didn't it?"