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If you could tell your TEEN self somthing what would it be

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 96
Thread images: 15

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If you could tell your TEEN self somthing what would it be
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>>607477687
Jet fuel can't melt steel beams And the shit is white and gold not blue and black
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Start drinking sooner, life will be better.
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lie and cheat way more.

plenty of dishonest people are very happy.
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I got blue and black and steel beams don't need to melt to collapse they just need to lose structural integrity which happens at lower temparures than melting.
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>>607477687
9/11 9/11 9/11
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cut your fucking hair
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Don't smoke the weeds
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>>607478290
This.
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Why cut hair
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You're gonna end up going full Nazi eventually. Don't bother dancing around it.
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>>607477687
The desert is ours. It is my home. Invaders come here, but they do not leave. They do not understand the desert; they do not understand how it gives life, and how it kills. So they die, and we grow stronger. The dead, now, the dead cannot pass on their newfound wisdom...so invaders keep coming, keep trying to take our lands and our wealth. But then, wealth flows through this land. And if our people have one thing, it is the love of wealth. It is sweeter than water, it is more powerful than the sword, for any sword can be turned aside with a gold coin. Gold will buy a thousand warriors...and a thousand warriors, why, they are the start of an empire!
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Cut your hair, you look ridiculous.
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>>607477687

Start jogging and swimming, get healthy you lazy shit. When Emma takes you in the cupboard at school and starts wrestling, don't get annoyed and leave.
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>>607478498
Haha please explain the cupboard
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>>607477687
All your dreams will come true and it all works out.
It's not true but at least it would be cool to hear my future self say that to me. It would have given me a ton of confidence.
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>>607477847
Agreed anon...Scientists say that Feggets who see the blue and black have something wrong with their cerebral cortex and are pretty much autists
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she's your cousin nigga, don't do it
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Download Ableton Live and get producing. You'll thank yourself later when you can skip out on going to school for production.
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I would convince myself to suck my own cock ("don't worry boy, it's not gay, it's technically masturbating) and i know he would like it...then i would tell him to stay the fuck away from women and I'd get a redo where i save my money, my time, my freedom, and my sanity! Suck a cock once in a while and get yours sucked too and you'll be aces!
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>>607477687
kill urself save the trouble
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>>607477687
Buy Apple stock when you're young. Then sell it in August 2012. Then buy all the Bitcoin you can. Sell that all at $900 each. Enjoy your retirement.
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>>607477687

dont follow your heart
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>>607477687
>If you could tell your TEEN self somthing what would it be
Convince your parents to buy shit-tons of Microsoft and Apple stock.
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>>607477687
the girl after that girl that breaks your heart after five years will get pregnant after six months

and you're okay with it.
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>>607478886
Fucking betafaggot...let a broad(s) get to you that bad
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She wanted the D m8
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Attend the walker school and sing the alma mater with pride more
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>>607478579
I was about 15, slightly above average girl drags me into the cupboard and shuts the door and starts kind of grabbing at my school blazer and generally mucking around and physically playing.

It goes over my head and I think she is being an ass and kind of break free and leave.

She had amazing tits too. I think I was like literally retarded.
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Nothing, my teen self would not listen to advice anyway.
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>>607479148

What can I say...your mom sucks a mean cock...
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>>607477687
dont buy a xbox 360. that shit will ruin you for the next 3 years. and fuck tracey , she wants it so bad
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I would tell myself to browse 4chan more. That's how the world really measures success. just to troll my young self
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>>607477687

1. Don't ask Melissa back out again, will ruin you
2. Don't date Jacqueline, just fuck her, or if you date her, don't feel anything
3. Elishia was good to you. You fucked that up
4. Don't do IT for a living, you're going to hate yourself and your life.
5. Even though dad told you not to stay in the family business as a butcher, stay in it. It's hard work and money will be tough , but you'll respect yourself more when you're 40 and not wishing you were dead.
6. For fuck's sake, *always* wear a fucking condom you nitwit. You dont' need 18 years of payments for a child you don't want, which you'll be paying for in 20 years if you don't listen to me now.
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never let BRANDY get away

NEVER
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Alright enough of that jazz, let's turn this into a real teen thread
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I would tell myself to follow my heart, and hang out with my real friends. The only people that have never fucked me over. The butterflies.
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>>607479366
What does that even mean child??
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>>607479861
thank you based OP, I have been waiting
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Stop being such a faggot
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Don't bother playing wow
Sierra will get fatter and sell your shit for heroin don't even text that slut back
Never get in a relationship with someone that wants to fuck in the first month, it gets stale.
Spend time with dad, he doesn't have very long.
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>>607477687

when 2011 comes around, sell everything you have (and still live of course) and build a bitcoin farm. Don't worry you don't need to know what it means now. Just do it.

Then wait for it to hit about 300 USD each and cash out. it'll take a couple years, but it'll be so fucking worth it.

Also here's the powerball numbers...
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>>607477687
Just fuck 'em you little shithead; they so want it.
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As soon as they come up with that Bitcoin shit invest ALL your fucking money into it and than sell everything in the few weeks its booming and everybody is loosing their shit over it.
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Cmon guys
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>>607480054
>Sierra will get fatter and sell your shit for heroin don't even text that slut back
lol what the fuck anon, never date junkie girls
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Back to the Future lied to you. Hover boards will not be availabe by 2015. Also Convince parenta to invest in redbox as a gift to you. Yourwelcome younger self. Ill thank me once those checks start rolling in.
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>>607477687
I would tell my TEEN self to fuck TEEN ariana grande :^)
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>>607480204
Lets do this. Lost my folder.. hard as a diamond right now.
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>>607477687
Don't act so coy, you'll just end up with no friends.
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>>607478027
>>607477908
dank memes :^)
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>>607480494
:^)
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>>607477687

If you're talking in online chats and girls say they're 13, they're probably decoys from Perverted Justice. Fuck them.

If you ever go to a girl's house, take a fucking gun, just in case Chris Hansen fucking pops his ugly fucking face out and says, "Why don't you have a seat right over there."

Distract him, pull your gun, and end that miserable fuck's life. You need to because otherwise you'll get arrested anyway for just showing up and your life could get ruined. So make it worthwhile going to jail and shoot that fucking fuck right in his fucking face
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>>607480614
:^)
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>>607480726
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Guys, guys. I am a computer, AMA.
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get a job in highschool.
dont lie to yourself about college, you know you arent cut for it and just go to trade school.
do NOT live with your girlfriend.
every girl you like is crazy or will become crazy due to sudden death in her family,
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>>607480265
Started out with weed and the occasional pill, I think she started doing heroin to lose weight, tried it myself fucked for hours then woke up the next day in more pain then I've ever felt. After she ripped through my savings I fucked her friend and posted any proof of her being a heroin addict I could on fb and told her family, last I heard she's in prison.
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Sup /b/

So my psychology professor is a huge feminazi, and today she decided that she was going to force my mostly male class to watch this shitty fucking male hatred movie. So, femnazi hate thread.
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"an hero, now, while you're still young"
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>>607480726
KEK
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Don't wear shirts to your knees and huge jeanco pants.

You have an amazing body and you need to show it off.
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>>607481060
>you have an amazing body
kek, you fucking troll
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>>607477687
Go to the 6th grade Valentine's dance stag and then go straight to bed/playing xbox
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Self discipline will lead you to nail some huge opportunities. So stop the procrastination before it takes away things you want
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Quit world of warcraft, you care about it more than your future. You end up making 12 an hour at 25 instead of being an Architect like you had planned out.
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Don't worry, things will get better.

They'll also get worse after but still, don't worry about it. You'll be able to handle it by then.
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No, those shirts aren't fitting the same as a year ago.
No, it's not normal to go up a jean size a year.
No, your relationship will not work if you leave her to 'cool down' behind the TV for a few hours every day. Do some shit.
You will sell your CD collection for a stupid price. Don't even bother, you never even listen to CDs anyway.
Your hair is going to go very thin around 22. Might want to get a ballin' cut beforehand.
If you go to college, actually join a student society. You might not consider it cool, but holy balls you'll need it to network.

Lastly, do not buy Western Digital external HDDs. You'll lose all the music, porn and random stuff you have. Twice.
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>>607480913
shes a good girl, she made her bed
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>>607480726

I've started taking my gun when meeting new chicks (legal) off craigslist. I'm too paranoid of getting jumped or whatever, so it's always in my pants, just in case. Then once I know the girl is legit I don't bring it for repeat visits.
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>>607481606
shotgun?
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don't bullshit around trying to find yourself and "the" answers after high school. join the army and take the most pog job possible, one with plenty of chicks like human resources. fuck the infantry no matter how much recruiters push it and no matter how high speed you are. fuck your parents because they are holding you back, they aren't worth your time or concern. fuck bitches, get money, do your time, and when you ets get out join a trade school and a wilderness school to learn self sufficiency. get the fuck out of civilization bc the economy is going down, get innawoods and make bank as a park ranger. youll be a happy man
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>>607477687
Don't fuck that dog...
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Start trying, please start trying. Take shit seriously, stop spending your weekends playing wow and vandalizing shit with your friends. Start taking school and life seriously, prepare so you can have a good future.

Don't bother with Caitlin, she's a crazy bitch who gets married twice and a DUI by the time she's 21. She's not worth it.

Join the football team or something, you're fucking ripped as shit. This will leave you too.

Don't date these girls: Caitlin, Katie, Katelyn, Jacy, Angela, and Megan.
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April 11th, 2007. Offer to go to the store instead of your mother, if you don't, she'll get into a car accident that will leave her with crippling chronic pain for the rest of your life, cause the financial ruin of your family, and kill any opportunities you'll have in life.

Your grandfather will die a few months after that from heart failure, spend more time with him, he's the only father figure you've ever had.

Don't fuck Michelle, wait a year or two and ask Alyssa out instead, you'll be better for it and you two are so compatible it hurts.
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She want it too. Just do it and don't be an autistic faggot.
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>>607477687
Start grooming cousin Molly now, she becomes a fox in a few years.
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>>607479787
You sound like a faggot in younger years.
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ITT: ragret

DICK BUTT
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1) Actually give a shit about grades in high school. Football scholarships a lot better than wasted money on weed
2) Tell Brett don't go on that trip, you'll be a wreck after his funeral of you don't
3) Fuck the skinny slut behind you in health
4) Fuck Nikki instead of getting your boys from the bar, you'll lose your chance
5) Don't go do power hour the night of your 21st, you'll skip 3 finals and get kicked out of college
6) Keep working out and eat better, beer guts are only hot in trailer parks
7) Caitlin might be hot and a fun fuck, but she's bat shit crazy
8) Stop caring about others so much, most do nothing for you
9) Snorting coke and paying $200 for a blowjob from a stripper when u can't get it up isn't balling, it's a waste
10) Seriously, if your gonna spend that money atleast be able to get it up and fuck her
11) Keep drawing, who cares if artist don't always make a lot of money
12) Again, Caitlin's crazy. Don't let the pussy mesmorize you
13) Take your feels and wipe your ass with them
14) Your mothers a raging alcoholic cunt, get used to it bud
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>>607478749
Is that what scientists said? You fucking mongoloid.
>>
DICK BUTT
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I would never have been on this website if I went back and told my younger self what I want to; so it would be a positive change.
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>>607477687
Cancel that one new years party. Do it.
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don't date samantha but when you meet esther keep fucking theshit out of her
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>>607477687
Just kill yourself now, it gets even worse later your brother is a convicted pedo, and mom and dad get worse so you will be stuck with them for 40+ years
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>>607479587
>goes back in time to troll self. you belong here anon I give you all the bananas
>>
1. Stop smoking cigarettes you fucking idiot.
2. Don't join the Marines, you are too smart and you will hate being yelled at by people with half your IQ. Also wasting potential.
3. Several of your friends are going to be dead before you are 25, prepare yourself.
4. Don't go to graduate school right after graduation, you won't have motivation and will regret not going with the job opportunity. You can always go back.
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>>607477687
Stop being a pussy. Life sucks and it's not going to get fucking better less you make it better
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>>607477687
That busty blonde you have a crush on has the hots for you. Seek and destroy.
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>>607477687
DO MORE DRUGS FAGGOT!!!! YOU WONT DIE!!!
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>>607484387
5.When friends die don't start drinking heavily. 3 years of borderline alcoholism fucks you up. Just don't start drinking, your life is way better sober.
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Take every single opportunity you get to fuck bitches and get money. Don't join the military and don't sell your car ever.

>tfw missed out on so many opportunities and now regret my life
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"you cant be tried as an adult unless youre 16 in this state, go rape women"
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>>607477687
i tell myself things all the time, its how i think
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>>607477687
Look into gender identity disorder and hormone replacement therapy. Now.
Thread posts: 96
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