Walks into room
oh hi op
op looks at me in the eye with faggoty eyes of op i ness
i take off my trousers to reveal my legs made of penises and each hand of my foot is a penisses
op looks stunned
my penis foot finger penises start to piss out poo and vomit mixed as i walk towards op
it looks like silly string
op starts imediatly jizzing so much that his head explodes because op head is also a penis cause he dick head
poo everywhere in little poo strands of string
there also a baby and a my little pony coverd in poo
op dies in room
i walk out and reveal i am lock ness monster standing at about trwee hundredd atoms high
high is from weed that was smoked
tl:dr the window sill paint is dripping onto the pipe because umbrellas sunlight is too near
Sorry, my kid isn't usually this noisy :^)
>Proceeds to text on phone without doing anything to stop the child.
>Zone the fuck out till I notice I'm creeping someone out while I stare at them
>I look up from the noise and examine the people in the room for the first time. You look familiar.
>MFW I realize why it burns when I pee
>Lady allows loud, obnoxious, half retarded child to roll around literally on my feet under my chair, have to almost sit with my legs up in the air. Stare at her. Nothin. Cough. Nothin. Ok. Put legs down, swift little kick to kids head. OH man, did you pinch ur skin in there little guy, ohhhh man. I bet that hurt little buddy. Little bastard stayed on the other side of the room after that.
>child abuser blah fucking blah, hey, you go to a waiting room with a 104 temp, sick as fuck and deal with that shit better than I did. Bet to this day the little fucker has a flat spot on the back of his head.
>Grab the Highlights magazine and circle all the scavenger hunt items in ink.
"Ding, Ding, Diiiing, Diiiiiiiiin,"
"Dunna dun dun duna dund un"
>listens to my headphones
>smokes my e-cig blowing big clouds into the air above us
>spreads my legs wide and burps loudly daring anyone to challenge my alpha status
>playing an imported H-game
>only two chairs left to sit in are flanking you
>four people choose to stand
>one of them is a mother that has a deathgrip on their young child's hand pretending not to see you
>play with this thing when all alone.
>stop when someone else walks in.
>lights up a blunt
>see my child has fallen
>call him over to me
>let him hit the blunt
>he chills out
>i take off my trousers to reveal my legs made of penises and each hand of my foot is a penisses
>reveal my legs made of penises and each hand of my foot is a penisses
>each hand of my foot is a penisses
>each hand of my foot
>is a penisses
I never know what the fuck is going on in this fucking room
Did you just take a picture of me?
>waiting room in an aggressive cycle of yawning
>can't take it anymore as it makes me want to reposition myself, aching my hemorrhoids
>consider the relation of yawning to werewolves, hoping to find the original yawner so I can provide a silent take down with my katana
>take out flip phone
>a few seconds later, an explosion and screams are heard in the distance
>walk up to receptionist
>"Can you please inform me where the closest dumpster is? My ex keeps texting me and I wanna throw out this phone where I'll never find it."
>what could possibly be worse than being retarded? Why bring it in public?
>just fucking feed it and hope it runs into traffic.
>jesus christ I can't imagine living a life with a fucking re--
"Excuse me, is anyone sitting here?"
"Oh, no, go right ahead!"
>Jesus christ and it smells, they always smell...
>Look into the vague direction of the sound
>Look back down to the floor
>Look through the window
>Look back down to the floor.
>Adjust standing position.
>Continue standing awkwardly.
>takes out 50 inches long butplug
>quietly sticks that shit in my ass
>pretends no one's watching while trying not to scream in pleasure
>quietly stares at the only girl in the room
>get up and grab a drink from the machine
>look around and can't see a bin for the plastic cup
>ask the receptionist if there's a bin somewhere
>She says no and then continues typing on the computer
>I'm standing there with a plastic cup in the middle of the room and everyone's looking at me
>"Ookaaay" I uttered, in a somewhat confused manner, not expecting that response from the receptionist who offered no solution to my plight
>a second or two has now passed as I attempt to think of a solution
>all I can think about is the fact it's now been two seconds and if I leave it any longer people are going to think I'm weird
>it's been three seconds while I think about people thinking about me
>"I think there's a bin outside, a bit down the road" a woman from the other side of the room shouted
>my saviour, she brings an end to my agony
>I leave to find the bin
>walk down the road 30 seconds, can't find it
>surely I should've found it by now
>look around, can't see it
>if I take longer people are going to think something's wrong
>"Fuck it" I throw it in the bush
>Go back inside to waiting room and sit
>name is called, I go inside, all is well
>leave just after someone else
>they go in the direction of the cup
>passes the bush
>look to the side
>obviously sees cup
>looks back at me
>laughs audibly for a few seconds
>continues walking and shaking their head
That was the last time I ever went to the doctors office.
Go up to the receptionist. When s/he asks if you have an appointment,
look wildly around and start whispering the word `appointment?’ under
your breath. Then scream it, and jump out a window.
>Look towards the receptionists desk
>See two men kicking her
>Look down at my feet
>Glance at the desk again
>THE MEN HAVE VANISHED
>Kneel and pretend to tie my shoes before standing up again.
>an assortment of chairs in the room
>group comes in and sits next to you
>awkwardly have to grab an old magazine to position yourself away
>batteries on gameboy color just happen to die
>old as fuck PC Gamer
>spending thousands on a shit pc
>stare at carpet, following the patterns
>try to zone out with cellphone
>realize I have no games
>never able to recreate the sound
>everyone thinks you farted
>Jumps on floor, siezing.
>Everyone in shock.
>a small unattended niglet approaches.
>sensing danger, I suddenly rip off my pants and masturbate furiously.
>Niglet runs away to his single mother, who is visibly turned on, but too afraid to do anything about her burning desire.
>The doctors office security comes in through the door.
>the floor is made of tile.
>they try to grab me.
>the jokes on them i coated myself in Vaseline before I came here.
I slip out of their grasp, slipping wildly all over the floor.
>sense the end is near, begin shitting.
>skidmarks all over the floor.
>Slide into the wall
>This is the end
>there is no other choice but to put me down.
>the security guards draw their automatic railguns, and shoot at me repetitively.
>while they reload their guns, I take the sharpie from the lady at the front desk.
>jam it up my pooper.
>The guards have finished reloading, by now, but it doesn't matter.
>turn 360 degrees, and try to walk out of the waiting room.
>the guards don't care. They've already made up their minds.
>They shoot me in the head as I try to moonwalk out.
>my corpse slips into a pile of shit and spaghetti, that was dropped from the niglet's mothers pockets.
Where were you when I was kill?
>everyone erupts into a high laughter, including the tard, over this retard who farted in his seat
>everyone laughing too vehemently to acknowledge man dying on floor
>some guy just came in
>didn't even check in
>isn't in line to check in
>is just fucking standing there
>Is something about to go down?
>walk up to receptionist and bring it to her attention