Story time, /b/. I'm going tell you a story about the craziest

>>606040002
are you sure? does it really get better? or is it just another empty promise that every god damn storyteller on this website makes?

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>>606040002
Continued

>Best friend is still dating Sarah
>She asks me for help with her math homework
>Offer to tutor her as a favor to my friend
>She's actually pretty nice to talk to
>Pretty much forget about the whole rape thing
>Start driving her home after school
>She develops a pretty obvious crush on me
>Don't act on it because I respect my friend
>After a while, she breaks up with my friend (for unrelated reasons)
>She wants to date me, but I'm not interested

And so starts the most convoluted, batshit insane plot I've ever seen trying to get me to date her.

Stay tuned, /b/.

>>606040002
Not sure if tree fiddy or walk the dinosaur is coming

>>606041355
has potential, but ill be damned if im going to bel air

>>606041355
>tuned staying intensifies

>>606041355
It was at that time that I realized Sarah was a naked banana from the YLYL era

Pre type the story next time dick head

>>606041015
true stories are usually anticlimatic and boring

>>606042320
this

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>>606041355

>Sarah is now single
>Text her sometimes, like I said she's nice to talk to
>Occasionally she mentions her friend Brian
>Brian is an older guy she met at a poetry slam
>They hang out and go to poetry readings and shit
>One week, Sarah stops showing up to school
>Text her to see whats up
>Turns out Brian tried to commit suicide but failed
>He's in the hospital recovering
>She's staying with him to keep him company and make sure he doesn't try again

I should mention that I've had suicidal friends before, so I'm taking this very seriously. Sarah is absolutely devastated. When she comes to school, it's clear she's been crying and not sleeping. I'm worried for her and consider talking to a counselor, but I decide not to.

TBC

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>>606040002
only a split second sooner and you would have insane quads

>pic related
>fyi pic is of christian bale crying after heath ledger footage was shown at a movie rewards event

Bumper cars

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>>606042616
boomp

This story is shit.
The fucking prego story is better than this shit.

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>>606042616

>A few weeks later
>Sarah is out of school for a good week
>Text her
>She got into a fight with Brian
>She left the hospital room to clear her head
>When she got back, he had killed himself
>HolyFuckingShit.png

Now here's where it gets interesting

>But wait, she says
>He left you a letter
>Only you're allowed to read it
>I haven't been able to bring myself to give it to you


Stay tuned to hear about the letter. I still have it, I'll try and get a good pic to upload

>>606042616
>Brian commits suicide
>Sarah asks OP to comfort her
>Sarah and OP make out
>OP finds out Sarah made up Brian, Cried a lot for no reason, and didn't sleep just to get OP to want her to fuck him

>>606043597
well duh, the letter probably says to date op too

The wait is real

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>>606043565
>The letter reads
>For OPs eyes only
>Open letter
>OP, you must dump warm stale cum all over dead body
>Then I'll be at peace
>P.S. Sarah wrote this

Op ded

>>606043597
>>606044159
Op here you guys are right, this isn't true, oh and I'm a huge faggot

real op here, claiming id.
disregard that, i suck cocks hahahahaha!

>>606043565
continue faggot

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>>606044502
OP has confirmed our doubts. This is a spiderman thread now.

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>>606043565

Pic related, the three fucking page letter.

I was gonna post it, but I realized it uses our real names, hence the blurry picture. I can scan it and block out the real names if you guys want, but it'll take some time.

Or i can just sum it up and continue with the story.

>>606044972
continue story then post letter

>>606045112
this

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>>606044972
>tfw OP may still deliver

>>606045112
What officer Cock-Knuckles said

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>>606040002
I am still waiting for the continuation of the story...

>>606045350
Kek at pic

> what type of autist writes a suicide note to someone they don't even know?

>>606045256
this

>>606045745
this

>>606045793
this

>>606045793
this

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>>606044972

To sum up the letter:

>I'm going to kill myself
>I need someone to take care of Sarah after I'm gone
>I'm afraid of what will happen if you don't take care of her
>I'm afraid she'll go back to doing drugs
>Please, it's my dying wish
>Goodbye cruel world

>mfw I read the letter
>I fell for it hook, line, and sinker

>>606045890
this

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Hurry up. Pic related.

>>606040002
I knew a girl, who claimed she was from New Zealand. Faked an accent and everything. Girls are batshit crazy sometimes

>>606045964
this

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>>606045945
>not pre typing story

>>606046091
im in new zealand

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>>606045945
Why the fuck don't OPs type this shit out before pussy farting all over /b/?

inb4 this is all fake and
>So come on Jack be nimble,
>Jack be quick
>Jack Flash sat on a candlestick

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>>606040002

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>>606046438

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>>606045945

>Don't want to ignore this guy's dying wish
>Don't want Sarah to kill herself or go back to drugs
>So I start hanging out with Sarah again
>She's really not doing very well
>Very depressed, sometimes breaks down and cries about Brian
>Do my best to help her, not having much of an effect
>Afraid she's going to kill herself
>Starts weighing down on me
>Losing sleep, worrying a lot
>Become somewhat of a mess

>>606043565

inb4 cotton eye joe

>>606046438
Hahah that story reminds me of being a kid and playing with my Fingerbox, while watching freakazoid, remember candlejack? I used to be so afra

>>606047197
OH SHIT A SNI

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>>606046438
>tfw Don Mclean is a /b/ro

>>606046856
Eligible pics of letter or it didn't happen

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>>606046856

>Start talking to my friend (not the same one as before) because I need to get it off my chest
>Tell him the whole story
>Friend is like "Hold up just a second, nigger"
>"This Brian guy, who you've never met"
>"Writes to you, and only you, a guy he's never met, before he kills himself"
>Start to think about it
>WaitJustAFuckingSecond.stl

Dumping my tinder goth story while OP is being a fag.

>Just chilling at home one night
>Eating and fapping like usual
>This brilliant idea pops into my mind
>Find phone and get on tinder
>Uncontrollably start swiping
>Every 3rd girl looks like a whale
>Likeigiveafuck.gif

>>606046856
I'm so damn glad I'm not one of the chucklefucks that are gullible enough to get into op's problem

>>606047583
>guy youve never met writes you a note
>believes it
youre a moron op

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>>606047583
Op here with pics of sarah

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>>606047583

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>>606047583

>Realize I've never seen a picture of Brian
>Realize I've never talked to him
>Realize nobody else knows him
>Realize she's made up people before
>Realize this story is super fucking sketch

>>606047738

>Check phone again 30 mins later
>About 3 matches
>Nowtosealthedeal.exe
>Texting away like shakespeare
>Mingle my way down to 1 girl
>Eventually convince her to come over
>Looks like a sketchy goth bitch
>Tells me she'll be here in 10 mins

doing a full reading of this story in a fruity voice, not sure if to post or not.

>>606048034
Lol EPIC MEME XD XD XD

>>606048160
will listen

>>606048206
ROFLMAO!

fuck this stupid fucking thread

OP, kill yourself and that fat fucking bitch

>>606048152
>About 3
you had 1, nigger

>>606048152

>Sound at the door
>Tell her to come in
>Evil looking walrus slides into my house
>Engageawkardness.com
>Let out a beta conversation starter
>Bitch starts talking about conspiracy theories
>Eventually I just go for a kiss
>As I get closer she directs her mouth elsewhere
>Mouth is literally up against my earhole
>She whispers "read the first letter of every sentence".

im done op, fuck you

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>>606048152
Hmmm... Seems promising

>>606048861
this anon has officially stolen op's thread

>>606048861
lol.

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>>606048148

>Realize I'm gullible as fuck

>But surely nobody is that manipulative
>surely nobody is crazy enough to invent a person and have him commit suicide
>surely nobody is crazy enough to write a three page letter pretending to be the suicidal guy
>surely nobody would miss school, lose sleep, break down and cry to make it convincing
>surely nobody would think this is a valid way to get a boyfriend
>surely

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>>606048861

>>606048861
MOTHERFUCK

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>>606048861

>>606048861
Fuckin noice

>>606048861
oh shit nigger

>>606048861
heh

>>606048861
noice nigger

>>606049161
OP you're a disappointment

>>606047841

i think we should start writing emails to people using moot's name and see how many people actually think it's moot emailing them. same thing.

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>>606049161
Shirley

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>>606049161

>Don't know what to do
>Afraid she'll kill herself if I confront her
>Afraid I'm wrong and she was actually telling the truth

So I do the only logical thing:
>Stop talking to Sarah completely
>Don't make eye contact in the halls
>Keep walking when she says hi
>Don't answer her texts
>Pretend she doesn't exist

>>606049599
And try to sell them 4chan gold memberships

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>be me, reading about how OP fell for the most obvious shit to ever hit the fan
>never met this guy
>he writes a letter to you, and only you
>you believe this shit
>mfw

>>606049726
go away

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>>606049726
"Logical"

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>>606049726

>Mfw she won't stop texting me
>Mfw she admits the whole thing
>Mfw she professes her love for me
>Mfw she begs me to date her
>Mfw I keep ignoring her

>Turns out, Sarah was never real.
I was the crazy one. I made it all up.
>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
>Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

>>606049726
>logical
>still talking to this crazy bitch

>>606050235
I think you mean autistic works of fiction

>>606049940

fucking this shit right here, nigger

as soon as he said he bought the guy in the hospital i was all "nah nigga, that a trick doe"

no one woulda believed that bitch again

>>606050439
the thing is OP got all depressed because he is a fucking retard

OP is fucking guitarded, whole thread is acoustic

>>606050235
I'm OP, quit trying to derail my thread

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this is now a banana thread

>>606050693
I'm the OP, stop attempting to deroad from my bread.

>>606049726
> asleep one night
> sarah calls me repeatedly
> start to get pissed! answer the phone
> sarah is crying hysterically, tells me she's about to jump off the bridge, how she can't handle life
> get in my bike and start cruising to the bridge, there's only one in town
> i see her standing on the rail! I hop off my bike, get on the floor! everybody walk the dinosaur!

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>>606050154

To this day, she still texts me.

Pic related, got another text today

So now, /b/, I ask you.

What should I say to her?

>>606050826
I'm in love with you, Sarah. Can you meet me at my place?

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>>606050826
check these dubs is what you should do

>>606050826
what does she look like post pics

>>606050826
I despise of you on a cellular level
Post a pic of Sarah bro

>>606050826
"Anon killed himself who is this"

>>606051270
this

>>606051270
this

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>>606050826
Damn this bitch cray. Post a pic of her OP.

>>606048861

Saw the other thread where he spelled out walk the dinosaur, still 8/10 OP. Well done.

>>606051041
MOAR

>>606051270
Holy fuck this

>>606046201
are you retarded?

>>606050826
Ask her why, why she invents people, why she cant just ask you out normally

>>606051455
checked

>>606051270
this

>>606051677
checked & kek'd

>>606051491
Why would you think that?

>>606051270
OP send this and you will go down in history as the greatest non-faggot of all time

>>606051800
checked myself and kek'd

checked myself and kek'd

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/thread

>>606051270
do dis

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Did someone say dubs Fred?

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>>606051452
i dont rly got gifs

>>606051102
>>606051153


Alright, I'll see if i can without doxxing her

Gimme a sec.

I can also scan the letter if you guys are still interested

>>606050235
kek

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op look at these trips

>>606051800
You're checked as well, friend.

>>606052211
double double, ill take it

>>606048861
Ahhh,
Bravo

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>>606051270


That would be fucking amazing, but she knows it's not true. We have mutual friends and shit, she would know if I killed myself.

>>606052101
u need to go on with the story fag also dubs get

>>606052211
all i see is double doubles.
checked

>>606052211
Double dubs. Sort of like trips.

This is such a mess.

>>606052428
how about you do that anyway just to see what reaction you get

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check my dubs cause im blessed by dubs fred

>>606052486
But. Not. Trips.

>>606052428
Get all your friends in on it. Get back at that hoe.

>>606052513
But these dubs will fix it

Give her dick you fucking faggot, op

dubs dubs smoke dubs everydubs

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>>606052428

Pic related, it's her

>>606047583
Are you stupid or just autistic?

>>606051823
Dude posts about crazy girl pretending to be from new zealand and you decide to reply with ''im in new zealand''. Fuckin why

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Trips get

>>606052709
Ew

>>606052709
You know I was on the fence about your story. Now that I've seen her it all makes sense.

>>606052588
Is everyone going to just disregard that anon called and checked his own dubs?

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dindonuffin

>>606052709
qt3.14

>>606052709
Ask her for a pic of dirty panties the dirtier the better

>>606048861
made me chuckle

>>606052709
you did say 4/10 and well you didn't lie...

>>606052944
Yeah, because THESE DUBS ARE BETTER

>>606052944
CHECK EM

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check em

>>606051041

Image search didnt help, any sauce or artist?

>>606053166
>>606053255

check'd and check'd

>>606052709
Hit it, secretly record it, tell her and use it as blackmail, make up some convoluted story about how itll upload to xvideo, pornhub... etc, if you dont stop it everyday. Milk the blackmail, 7/10 daily fucks and make her cook and clean.

>>606052709
with one single picture, OP just proved his entire story...

Bravo OP

this is now a dubs thread

all these dubs, reminds me of a dubs thread long ago in which i was a dubs god, good times

>>606050826
She's not a psychopath/sociopath OP. You're just a faggot and she's mentally sick.

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>>606053166
>>606053255
Welcome to the breakfast dubs my friends

>>606053333
Holy shit checked

>>606052096
show?

>>606053333
LOL fuck omg

>>606053333
oh shit

>>606053333
holy shit my first quads

>>606053333
here we go again, just like the old thread, brings a tear to my eye now all i need to do is roll 1234 eventually

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Dubs or Dishonor

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>>606053333
You too sir got checked

>>606040002
dubs thread

>>606052709
well blonde
blue eyes
white skin

bonus for glasses
and not fat

>>606053333
>this can't be happening

>>606052101
scan letteer fagg

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>>606052709
OP delivered. Nice.

>>606053333
good job son, ill never roll dubs again sadly

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Will I get dubs?

>>606053333
WHAT DO YOU WISH OF US OH LORD OF QUADS?

>>606052709
>4421694798315
You done fucked up son

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You are blessed by Dubs Fred. May you have good dubs in 5 posts

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>>606052709
Found "her" (if OP is legit)
facebookcom(slash)daryan.mckeown

>>606052709
op.

Sanest thing to do: ignore her for all eternity and let time do the separation.

Least sanest: bang her.

>>606052709
Get nudes

>>606054044
Oh shiiiitttt

>>606053903
What dubs sire? You mene these? Checkem

>>606054044
>daryan.mckeown
i have to admit this is close

IF DuBS this thread is SHIT

IF NOT DUBS THREAD STILL SUCKS

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>>606054044
Get fucking rekt OP. Anon is based god

>>606052588
nope chuck testa

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>>606052709
She hot its just her glasses lol

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>>606052709

Holy fuck, the dubs in this thread though.

I'm afraid to hit it because I'm afraid she would accuse me of rape or something. I don't want to put my dick in crazy and regret it.

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>>606054044
>ohshit

>>606054277
Thread is confirmed trash

>>606054399

DOUBLY CONFIRMED

>>606054488
ohh shit

>>606054399
>>606054277
Checked 'em, thread is double trash

>>606054488
Dem dub dubs.

>>606054488
>>606054399
too many

>>606054360
Record it, make sure you audably ask if its okay before you shove in balls deep and nut in that crazy ho.

>>606054488
TRIPLY SHIT THREAD ANONS ABORT ABORT

Is this OP? /chase.albers.12

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>>606054044
AYYY LMAO

>>606053867
>>606052709
>facebook/daryan.mckeown
Daryan McKeown. Class of 2016.
OP is either pedophile faggot or underageb&.

dubs if thread is kill
no dubs if op is faggot

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>>606054044
Confirmed. It's her. Anon is based.
Rest in peace OP press F to pay respects

>>606054270
have you sent her anything yet OP? faking suicide was best suggestion

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>>606054044
>DARYAN

>>606054969
Is that OP in the pic?

>>606054969
should we raid pretending to be Brian?

>>606054044
That girl's like 17

>>606054860

Or OP just took a pic from some rando's facebook to make his bullshit story look real

>>606054488
I am the new Aragorn of dubs, the heir to Isildur's dubs of old, you niggers.

This thread is ass

dubs, check em

>>606054969

well OP, that's one ugly bitch

>>606054969
GG everyone message her with details of story

>>606054969
Thanks, OP is probably full of shit though

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>>606050826
Your story started good and ended horrible. 2/10

>>606055091
no you moron that's brian

rip

Rip OP, linking bread to the child and bailing. Fake and gay, or underageb&

>>606052709
>>606054044
MORE THAN JUST CLOSE
teeth are the same
eyes same
forehead size/ hairline
cheek mole
cheek smile muscles
lips same [thinnish]
eye brows same [though can be plucked, but still]
wears hair same [though dyed]
same glasses

nice hunting dood

>>606054360
don't hit it. she's not hot enough to be worth any potential trouble.

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>>606055091
>yfw OP's name is Shrek

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Muahahahahahaha

>>606055275

No shit. Anyone who believes this is fucking retarded

>>606054860
>>606054860
>>606054860
>>606054860
>>606054860
This

>>606055404
oh my god

I smell faggotry op...

check em' and kek em'

55555

HURRY NIGGERS, SCREENSHOT THE PIC AND GREENTEXTS AND DO AN EDIT
Op will be kill by psycho bitch.

>>606055404
fucking kek, also beta af

File: NamiLoadScreen_3.png (154KB, 308x560px)

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>>606055404
>Daryan
>Shrek

>>606055404
OP fucked up

>>606048861
I've seen plenty of these, but none that used the steel beams one. Bravo, sir.

File: Capture.png (1MB, 1167x762px)

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>>606055372
forgot to attach pic
even though already confirmed
oh well fuck it

K-E fucking K

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>>606040002
Oh Baby a Triple!
Oh Yeah!

Triiiiiiiiips!

>>606055372
Thanks /b/ro

If you fags have Kik message me: Kmingage

>>606055404
URL is facebook (slash) chase.albers.12

Hey Chase, why did you change your profile name to Shrek you raging faggot?

File: 1427332524142.jpg (31KB, 357x353px)

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>>606055848
>>606055845

>>606055845
THATS NOT TRIPS NEWFAG

>>606055848
Shit. Uh abandon thread?

>>606055922
Muh kekles

>>606050826
Nice Moto X.

>>606055996
No...but these are dubs

i finger my anoos for dubs

>>606048148
>It was a dark and stormy night.
The only part missing in OPs lame assed story.

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>>606055427
>>606055404
>>606055392
>>606055091
>>606055044
>>606055156
>>606054969
>>606054845
>>606054270
>>606054044
Are you faggots really this fucking dense?

Op confirmed to be shrek.

>>606056180
Those aren't dubs, these are

File: deal-with-it.png (2KB, 1024x228px)

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>>606055946
Fuck I just noticed there's a 2 in the front sorry old fagg

>>606048861
Top Kek

>>606056300
Dubs speak the truth.

>>606056298
Thats why I said "(if op is legit)" fag. Learn to read. Plus it COULD be "Sarah"

>>606056298
>>606056579
Are you faggots really this fucking homosexual?

>>606051270
this

File: OP is fag.jpg (14KB, 200x200px)

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Did you guys even read the story? It's total BS, this is just some random pic op found on the internet

>>606055404
Wait wut Shrek is a real name

>>606055404
/chase.albers.12

Well looks like OP is a hardcore memer

>>606056815
Also a faggot

>>606052211
almost

>>606056665
Only someone as autistic as OP could own a facebook page dedicated to Shrek.

3/26/15
The day shrek told us abput his psycho girlfriend, was subsequently betrayed by /b/ and is presumed dead by his grill
Nevar fourgit.

>>606056748
Maybe. Screencap of relevant plot
Points in text? Confession? A connection of some sort.

>>606056759
yeah he got shrekt at birth by his parents

>>606056961
Also the day I got these sweet, sweet dubs

>>606053333
Checkt

>>606056961

F

>>606048861
Just Eating This Find Uncontrollably? It doesn't make any sense

>>606056986

Blurry screencap of some random papers
Texts that he probably sent to himself
It's bs

>>606056748

this

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>>606052709
Put your dick in it op

>>606052709
Not worth the crazy. Not even average or cute. Borderline ugly. Would consider if great personality.

>>606057279

this

>>606054969
69

>>606057366
>>606057366
>implying crazy doesn't equal a great personality

Crazy girls are interesting as fuck. I live for them.

File: 1355543745393.png (75KB, 193x243px)

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oldfag here dropping by for a visit.
ya'll are pathetic. no one has even sent the link to the thread to the girl asking who OP is to dox him.

>Saint Darren Wilson comes in from his holiday stroll
>To his surprise, a nigger to mow
>Enthusiastic he jumps to his pistol with glee
>Exclaims Darren, Every high noon, Mike Brown he waits for me
>Looks to his left, sees big Mike Brown
>Barrages him with bullets, hands raised high
>Every shot strikes it's mark sending blood sky high
>All of Ferguson was 1 nigger down
>Maybe there wouldn't be a racewar had Darren been in town

Check all first letters

File: 3811997_t.gif (315KB, 200x143px)

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>>606052709
>4/10
More like 7.5-8/10
op is a faggot

>>606057694
>three years
>oldfag

>>606057279
Kids are creative these days.

>>606048861
no

>>606051270
This

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>>606057927
try 7 piece of shit

>>606057694
>oldfag here
Newfag detected

>>606048861
WHAT THE HELL DOES
"Sound tell evil engageawkwardness let bitch eventually as mouth she" mean

>>606055404
pls be OP

>>606057882
>8/10
Nigger wut

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>>606057882
Shitty troll is shitty

>>606058140
It's obviously three.

>>606057182

First letter of every sentence you stupid fuck

>>606058274
ikr

solid 10/10 for sure

>>606052709
Woah. OP, what state do you live in? I wanna start dating Sarah. She is 100% my type.

>>606057882
I genuinely agree

>>606053867
What?

>>606055404
my fukken sides man

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goddammit OP new bread finish the damn story

>>606058199
Dumb fuck.

>>606058507
Facebook link.

File: image.jpg (65KB, 597x600px)

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Op bailed top kek

>>606058274
>>606058326
beautiful white race, 3 points right there, glasses, my personal preference, +2, blonde hair +1, cute face + 2

>>606057608
>>606057344
I agree, lookin at that bastard I'm guessing he doesn't have pussy lined up at his door