Best of greentext

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>>596427496

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some classic stuff

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contribootin

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Contributing

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>>596427136
>I can't handle this
>My heart hurts

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newfags wont get this

>>596432121
KEK

>>596430743
>>596430743
ya bro

fucking love prison

ball hockey tournaments

fuck ya

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>>596427136

>>596428358
This made me rage sooooo fucking much.

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I've got a few greentexts in my folder i'll dump

>>596434949
this had me bursting into laughter

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I rarely lose these YLYL greentext threads. You want to know why?

...its cause I'm a lil stinker! Hahahah!

I'm just a lil stinker, hah!

>MFW i'm just a lil stinker

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>>596435031

>>596433098
it was really hard to read this

>>596434730
This is so fucking beta

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a huge kek

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>>596427136

>>596433696
one of the best i've read here

>>596433696
howling.
11/10

>greentext

>>596427136
Thar be a feel a brewin'

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fuckin anthony
30+ mins read, but well worth it

>>596430404
classic

>>596428786
fucking lost

>>596432178
dinokek

>>596432178
I got the joke, but because of what you added I think as if I missed something
>▲
[spoiler]▲▲[/spoiler]

>>596441256
[/spoiler]spoiler[spoiler]

>>596433098
Jesus christ what a fucking faggot. I'm visibly angry.

>>596441638
How do I spoiler on /b/?

>>596442004
you spoil it every time
>newfag

>>596436382
>18
>house party
>9/11

Too bad it was on a weekday. This nigga would have been in school.

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>>596433098
Please tell me this isn't real

>>596442567
>nigga
>school

pick one

>>596433098
What the fucking hell is this shit?

>>596438347
>>596438653
Really? I thought it tame.

>>596434949
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-F4gG7rXw1s
wow, that does make it.

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Contributing

>>596445642
someone explain the sauce on the verse?

>>596428358
i probably would have killed them

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>>596427136

>>596429892
>all my keks

>>596428358
this is depressing because that is the extent of legal action that can be taken in the situation

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>>596428358
DUI gone and feminists lives ruined, plus the white knights lives also pretty messed up.

I hope the kid grows up okay, but this anon did a great thing.

>>596444507
I myself am English. Seeing people post shit like this amuses me, because its just fucking funny how people think all Brits are posh toffs that smoke pipes. Most of us just say the word "cunt" like its the most common work in the world.

>>596446518
omg I just lost so hard

>>596432491
>work as a nurse
>EMS goes out
>I go with him
I hate it when a story is glaringly fake from the very start. Ruins it for me.

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>>596448766
pic related is how Americans views you English types

>>596449609
shut up and have fun fagit

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IDK why, but this always makes me lose my shit

>>596434949
tears. lost so damn hard

>>596433098
Feeling like beating the living shit out of someone after reading this...

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at this point of the thread we need the greatest bastard of them all EB McGee

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>>596451520
fake and gay

>>596433098
>"dont worry he knows"

holy shit i don't think i have ever wanted to kill a bitch so bad in my life

>>596439451
Kek'ed so fucking hard

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>>596451843

>>596428358
That's the reason why I fucking hate whiteknights.

>>596437694
>detonnatez
hahaha

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Mark the mint man

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this got me quite a bit buut its a good greentext imo

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Anyone got any more shit from /k/?

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>>596454436
I only have a couple that don't take forever to find on my phone.

>>596432897
/fit/

>>596433696
I lost it at grandmother's urn.
>wonderbread + mayo
what the fuck man

>>596428656
>let's smoke the property of my little brother while my dumbass friends are invading our home!
His friend deserved it.

>>596433098
I want to beat the shit out of the beta faggot for being such a beta faggot, wow.

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>>596436382
>>house party on 9/11
...on a tuesday, at 9 in the morning

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>>596457578
>what is reading comprehension
you retarded yo

>>596432178

>newfags wont get this
>9/05/13

...

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>>596427136

>>596453903
you son of a bitch.. it hurts.

>>596458945
GOAT

>>596427136
Feel club
The last rule is if this is your first night, you have to feel

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>>596459029

>>596451520
Shit nigga you almost made me cry.

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>>596429892
The best part is how many replies he gets

>>596429475
kek

>>596451520
Thanks, I was looking for it

>>596457250
Are you saying he deserved to die in an outright painful and horrible manner because he accidentally mistook a fuel cell for a blunt?
It definately sounds like you are.
And guess what that makes you?

A fucking cunt.
How can you wish someone a painful death over a stupid mistake

>>596460037
whaaaaaaaaaaat
>i am not a robot

>>596446939
>check'em
lost so bad

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tfw no little sister to take care of and be a big brother to

>>596439451
10/10

>>596462145
>greentext

fucking moron stay over at reddit

>>596462145
this doesnt look very much like green text or 4chan, what is this fuckery?

>>596461366
checked.

>>596462536
huehuehuehue

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>>596427136

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>>596462717
>>596462713

>>596433098
At least he didn't accept his fate as a cuckhold.
That's some hardcore crazy manipulative bitch right there tho.

>>596462145
This one is hilarious, post more plz

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>>596441443
Awesome

>>596429892
the replies

>>596428358
And this ladies and gentlemen is why you always carry a gun and a combat knife.

>>596433098
I would have killed someone if it was me.

>>596432897
goddamn... what a fag

>>596433098
And on this day, anon developed a cuck fetish

Seriously though, wow. How does someone allow themselves to be walked on like that. Grow a spine.
This was actually saddening to read. Poor guy is probably still head over heels for that toxic bitch

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time to dump

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>>596465377

dubs oh yesh

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>>596465427

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>>596465507

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>>596465548

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>>596465592

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>>596465664

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>>596465713

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>>596465788

>>596428358
This is how retarded and worthless white knights are IRL.

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>>596465854

>>596428358
fucking yes

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>>596465988

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>>596466101

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>>596466176

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>>596466286

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>>596466323

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>>596466450

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>>596466535

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>>596466905

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>>596467043

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>>596467148

>>596446939
Holy fucking shit.
my sides
my tears
my everything
aylmfaoo

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>>596467216

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>>596467311

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>>596467411

>>596432897
I was expecting it to end with some kind of pay off like he went and burned jakes house down or even some kind of dinosaur or some other shit but nope literally just a story about a dude who tried to be alpha but became so beta he basically became an it.

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>>596467519

>>596465427
has anyone else ever taken a shit like this and just put a finger on either side of your arsehole and pulled?? it is fucking heaven!!

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>>596467642

>>596434652
That's enough internet for tonight. Goodnight /b/ros

>>596461901
A waste of time.

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>>596467862

>>596427496

Whomever this fuck is, I hope he dies alone and afraid.

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There's 7 parts, will I post the rest?

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>>596467993

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>>596468259

>>596468201
yes

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garuntee noone of you have seen this before ever because i made it a few months ago. first time posting

r8?

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>>596468443
Alright
>>596468201

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>>596468659

>>596433098
this made me sad and uncomfortable

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>>596468346

>>596461971
Same here , it really sucks :(

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>>596468697

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>>596468791

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>>596468702

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>>596468843

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>>596468891

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>>596468926
The End

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>>596469007
ty

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>>596468983

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>>596469195

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>>596469467

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>>596469578

>>596464859
You do realize that would make everything worse, right?

>>596453903
right in the god damned feels...
>>596451520
wow...

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>>596469739

>>596466000
nice dubtrips bruh

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>>596439451
>mathturbator

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>>596431189

>>596427496
imagion what people thought when they found the body. covered in semen.

>>596446631
"ridin' dirty" you fucking inbred

>>596427496

I think the authorities are going to think that the kid was kidnapped, raped, and murdered when they find a naked body fill of jizz and if they're able to link the DNA from the jizz back to him he's going to be in for a lot of trouble.

Let's say that he's caught and his story holds water in court with the evidence that the death couldn't possibly have been done by him, what's the penalty for fucking a dead body you've come across?

That is some pretty sick shit and I know he's going to feel bad about it for the rest of his life whether he gets caught or not.

>>596439451
>>596439451
http://www.kens5.com/story/news/local/2014/06/24/10303644/

holy shit

>>596433098
I'm glad its not me who gets the rage from reading this. Shit like this, a few other things, and some painful as all hell life events have actually started to make me get off to the pain and disgust I feel from these sorta stories. Thinking about going to counselling for it but until then moar like this?

>I had a dream once that I was in a school for whatever reason.
>I was going to each classroom door and I'd peak in.
>I don't remember why I was doing this, but somehow along my journey I encountered Bill Cosby.
>He didn't see me that I could tell but he was sputtering his gibberish language.
>He was riding a rascal or small scooter through the halls.
>It's odd now that I think about it, but was normal in the dream to me.
>Something in my mind told me to get the hell away from him.
>I began darting through the hallways and he was always on my path on his damned scooter.
>I couldn't see him and he couldn't see me, but I knew he was there because his scooter kept making a 'meep meep meep meep' sound when it moved.
>Running out of places to run, I darted into a classroom and ducked behind a small wall in the room.
>I could hear his scooter nearing me.
>"Meep meep meep meep"
>It got closer to me.
>"Meep meep meeeep meeeeeep" the meep sounds growing longer as the scooter slowed, right around the corner from me.
>One last "meeeeeeeeep" and I could see the front wheel of this damned scooter with this possessed Bill Cosby who spoke in tongues.
>This was when I decided to take action.
>I sprung out from behind the wall and I believe I yelled "Pudding pops!" while waving my hands at him like a crazy person!
>Then I woke up. Confused.

>>596461901
funny but cut off at the bottom