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Yesterday was the craziest day of my life, /b/. Let me tell you

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 25
Thread images: 9

Yesterday was the craziest day of my life, /b/. Let me tell you my tale.

>mom left when I was a kid, been living with dad ever since
>he's pretty fucking rad
>anyway, onto the actual story
>be me, 6 months ago
>sitting in my room, eating doritos and playing vidya because I'm no-life trash
>go into kitchen for some orange soda
>fucking love that shit
>putting the liter bottle back in the fridge when the front door opens
>peek out to see who it is
>it's my dad and he's with some gril I've never seen before
>immediately fall in love
>she's the most beautiful thing my eyes have ever laid my eyes upon
>she can't be a day over 18, but she gives off the youthful glow of a child
>walk into living room and say hi and ask who he's got with him
>her name is Luxor, and her old family threw her out onto the streets (her dad was an old friend of his until now, and he's known her for years)
>she's going to be staying with us for a while until he can help her find a new place to live
>ohsweetjesusyes.jpg

continuing in thread
>>
Okay
>>
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>>592536778
>fast forward a few weeks
>Luxor has moved in completely
>unfortunately the house is pretty small, so we set up a little space for her in the garage
>we never use it since we only have one car between us and we could use the space for storage anyway
>I thought she was going to hate us for putting her in there, but she didn't seem to mind it too much
>jack off everyday to the thought of her being under the same roof as me
>she's everything I've ever wanted
>all I can think about is her gaping mouth draping over my throbbing cock
>she will be mine
>spend the next several days attempting to win her affection
>offer to take her out to eat, go see a movie, the simple stuff
>she pretty much ignores me every single time
>sothatshowitsgoingtobe.pdf
>decide that I must have her by any means necessary
>dad tells me that one of his coworkers is throwing a party next weekend and he wants Lux and I to come
>the date is set
>>
>>592536778
This better be pretyped, nigger
>>
Bwomp.
>>
What kind of fucking name is luxor?
>>
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>>592537082
>the day of the party arrives
>Lux and I hop into my dad's truck and he takes us to the party
>his coworker (Craig) has a pretty sweet place
>three floors and a large backyard with a pool where the party is taking place
>I enter the backyard as my dad goes to introduce Lux to his associates
>and so it begins
>I creep into the house when nobody is looking and begin rifling through the drawers in the kitchen
>I find what I was looking for: a large steak knife
>knife in hand, I creep over to the screen door to scope out my target
>Lux is the talk of the party
>everyone seems to have a comment for her and my dad's friends can't seem to keep their hands off her
>what the fuck is this
>how am I going to get her alone with all of this shit going on?
>wait inside for another 20 minutes, just waiting for people to leave her alone for one moment so I can get her into the building
>no such luck
>that's it, I can't wait any longer
>>
>>592536778

u never stated how old u are or was

u 12 yo or what?
>>
>>592537360
Her real name was Rulo before she got turned into a heartless and then Luxor was created as her nobody. She really does have no home because she doesn't truely exist.

>She doesn't exist.
>>
>>592537689

shamalan pls go
>>
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>>592537549
>charge out of the house with steak knife in hand, heading straight for Luxor
>tackle Craig as he was the closest one to her and stab him relentlessly in the stomach
>people try to pull me off but I cannot be stopped
>turn my head toward Luxor, my face contorted into a fiendish bestial grin
>she stands there, frozen with fear, her mouth wide open from shock
>I make a mighty leap from Craig's corpse to Luxor's slender frame, ripping open the fly of my pants in the process
>shove my fully erect dick into her gaping mouth
>scream with pain and shock as my dick suddenly feels like it's on fire
>pull my dick out to find it looks like a burnt hotdog
>mfw most beautiful gril is actually most beautiful grill
>>
>>592537360
the kind someone 18 on the streets has...

she turns out to be a stripper slut and knobs his fake ass tiny cock the end....

save this shit for later op! i got fappin to do!!!!
>>
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>>592537901
niceeee
>>
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>>592537901
>tricked
>>
>>592538164
>>592537901
No it wasn't. It was way too fucking obvious. >Samefag
>>
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>>592537901
>>
>>592537901
7/10 good show mate
>>
>>592537689
Kek
>>
>>592537901
Had to go back and reread that shit. 8/10 made me kek.
>>
>>592537549
I feel that this thread is doomed to end with the dinosaur being walked in bel air by a spagetti monster that resembles shrek
>>
>>592539692
or dino steaks on the bbq
>>
>>592537901
Lol I liked it
>>
>>592536778

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6uL3Qf48UA
>>
fuck I knew something was wrong when I saw she had a weird ass name
>>
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>>592537901
8/10 OP made me laugh
Thread posts: 25
Thread images: 9


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