Give me the god damnist cheesiest you got b. Don't hold back.
The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
When William joined the army he disliked the phrase 'fire at will'.
>>591309733Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.
I had to quit being a doctor because I kept losing my patience.
When Peter Pan punches, they Neverland.
Don't trust people that do acupuncture, they're back stabbers.
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.
The Longest Joke Ever Written
An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a Hawaiian and an Alaskan), an Argentinean, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovak, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uruguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, an Iranian, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Syrian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, an Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahaman, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Canadian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and two Africans walk into a fine restaurant.
After scrutinising the group, the waiter says:
"I’m sorry, you can't come in here without a Thai"
A boy was born with no eyelids in Texas this week, so to compensate they used his foreskin as the missing eyelids. Doctors say that he will see just fine, he will just be a little Cock-eyed.
The aristocrats varies depending on the person telling it. It can be a minute or like half an hour long. However long it takes to offend everyone in the area twice over is usually fine.
There once was a whore from Peru,
Who filled her vagina with glue.
"If they pay to get in",
She said with a grin,
"They can pay to get out again too."
There was a young lady from China,
who had an enormous vagina.
And when she was dead,
they painted it red,
and used it for docking a liner.There was an old monk of Coblenz
Whose ballocks were simply immense
It took 44 laymen
3 priests and a shaman
To carry them thither and thence