ITT: God Tier green text stories

ill give it a bump. at work so nothing to contribute

>>580455898
same for me, bump

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Bumping

>>580455496
mega laughs

>>580455496

My fucking sides

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Shamless self bump

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bump

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The feels ; (

>>580456000
Dem trips

>>580456830
topkek

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my favorites are the long ones like this and google ultron

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>god tier

>>580457548
Google ultron had a shitty ending

>>580456093
damn...

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You all knew this was coming.

>>580456093
I choke up every time I read this. Fuck man...fuck.

>>580457002
whelp. Never taking that job, no matter what they'd pay me.

>>580459014
The feels are strong man

>>580459164
Any dying pet/horrific accident post just goes over my head, but this shit. Fucking hits home.

>>580459037
Shits fucked with my mind hard

>>580456608

Satisfying as fuck.

>>580459293
You have any pet threads? Never read one before, the posts that have feels are uncomfortably satisfying

>>580457628
yeah but it was still pretty interesting along the way. pretty relatable and ill greentext why
>be me, 14
>in computer lab at school
>learn about google docs
>basically a cloud
>I knew a little bit of vbscript
>open notepad
>type do msgbox loop
>message box says "achievement unlocked- obtain virus"
>cant close message box because loop
>send to all of my friends
>tell them to open it
>they do
>a few of my friends think its funny
>they send it to all their friends
>everybody in the computer lab (about 100 people) eventually have the file opened
>one kid starts freaking out
>tell the it guy at school
>it guy is borderline autistic
>thinks there is a hacker afoot
>traces it back to me
>thinks i am level 80 elite haxor
>i get suspended
>computer lab is shut down for a month as they try to rebuild all the computers
>are too stupid to figure out rebuilding the computers doesnt erase it from google's servers

1/2

>>580459709
There's one with an abandoned cat that's pretty heavy, one of the most famous but I can't recall the details.

2/2

>rumor spreads
>whole school thinks i am elite hacker
>later in the year i start learning c++
>have an IDE open
>simple iostream programming exercises open
>teacher sees
>thinks i am hacking the school's hard drive mainframe servers
>wat
>sends me to office
>look at laptop
>"looks like hacks to me"
>get suspended
>about a week later the school's servers crash
>"hacker's at it again"
>rumor spreads that its me
>get suspended
>wasn't even me
>banned from computers at that school
>got kicked out of school
not expelled, just got a letter after that school year saying i couldnt come back
>go to new school
>we are using google docs
>find my file
>"sfhskfhsdkjhsk.vbs"
>i had other vbs files there so i didn't know what it did.
>other ones were just sendkeys
>task manager is blocked on school computers
>couldn't close window
>teacher comes
>thinks i have a virus
>get suspended
>come back
>everyone thinks the school is being hacked again
>now known as that hacker kid
>didn't even know how to hack
>still never hacked anything
>mfw

>>580459732
>>580459894
hue

>>580459894
Made me laugh pretty hard

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Yep, its that time again

>EB motherfuckers

bumping

i really like greentext stories

>>580460719
; ( This one got to me

>>580456093
Am I the only one who hates the one? His dad comes off as a massive shallow cunt. I have no idea why the guy humored him as he did.

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worth the read

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>>58046>>580461278

>>580457002
Jesus Christ on a Cranswick that made me cry.

>>580459894
yeah. most fuckers are so tech illiterate that they wouldnt know binary if it bit them in the ass

>>580462043
:/embrace the feelings /b/ro

>>580462194
there are 10 kinds of people in this world
people who understand binary and people who dont

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>>580456093
tfw

Anyone have anymore Feels thread?

does anybody have the hornet one

>>580462959
nice one. i hope you enjoyed the subtle pun i made

>>580463603
i didnt at first because for some reason i read bit as hit

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Bump

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>>580463425

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>>580463425
>>580464253
goddamnit I forgot to say all I have left is weird shit from /fit/ and /v/ lol

>>580460719
Fuck.

>>580464678
Top fucking kek

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>>580464678
fucking love this one

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>>580460719
mfw

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>>580464945

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>>580456608
Fastfood you say?
read it! its worth it

Anyone got any good recent ones? While /b/ has gotten shittier over the years, some greentext stories are still pretty good.
Saw a life story one a couple of days ago with a guy who talked about events leading up to his sisters death, any one have that?

>>580461289
Save the picture onto a flash drive and put it in the box of things you'll understand when you grow up.

>>580456093
this one is seriously harsh man..

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>>580463529
This one?

>>580461289
It's not shallow to want your son to be happy though? The dad was probably crying because he felt he had let the anon down as a father, and that it's his fault he doesn't have any friends.

>>580456556
saw that coming from a mile away, still chuckled

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>>580463603
>>580463760
>>580462959
Look at me, I know computers!

>>580461289
No, the father wasted his son to be happy. Right or wrong he thought his son couldn't be happy living life like he was.

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>>580465603

Chuckled at this one.

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>>580455496
The Ballade of Edgardo.

>>580461493
Fuck I thought this would have a nice ending. :/

>>580461493
Why the fuck didn't he at least dox the cunt before killing himself?

>be 5
>parents adopt some chinky smelly bitch
>cries all the time
>breaks all my toys
>fucking hate her

>puberty hits me
>she's actually really pretty
>fap to her underwear and spy her in the shower

>she hits puberty
>fucking hot
>catch her masturbate
>be beta as fuck and panic
>"please don't tell mom and dad"
>why did I say that

>few days pass
>we're awkward as fuck, I'm horny
>she's more mature than me so comes up to me
>"you wanna talk aout the other day"
>we talk she explains, we start talking about masterbation
>she never saw a dick
>i should show her
>she agrees
>hard as fuck
>blushing and awkward, keep saying dumb shit
>she touched my dick
>i came and started farting
>rushed out of the room
>never talk about it again

>>580457687
loled hard

>>580466161
look at me, i point out the obvious in a passive agressive manner!

>>580466517
does anyone actually know what game this was?

>>580467038
Yes

>>580465936
yes thanks

>>580466161
>implying binary is only computers

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>>580456608

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>>580456953

>>580467868
>why didn't he dox the cunt
>yes

Tasha's brother

/thread

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suck muh keks

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Just came here to post dubs

>>580461493
actually just realised
>greentext: 28 October 2011
>article saying he an heroed: 8 July 2011
Bollocks confirmed

>>580457002
Nope, no fucking way I'm reading that one again. Nooooo fuckin way. Fuck that shit.

>>580469989
mfw 1 number off quads

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>>580457002

>>580470324
It gets bettter the more u read it

>>580456093
All the feels , man thats rough

>>580470503
I've read all of them. I'm not going through that roller coaster again. To be fair I've seen some shit of my own and reading some of the stories makes me a bit uncomfortable.

>Inb4 lelele tumblr triggers

>>580469924

this

>>580470876
Its so sad but so intriguing

>>580461493
I must say that I felt.

>>580471013
Brother almost died from OD, his heart actually stopped just as the paramedics got their shit set up. I had to help both of my brothers get one of their dead girlfriend's out of the shower after she hung herself. Similar stuff with suicide attempts by friends (I've been on the rope myself) and lots of trips to the hospital. I'm not crazy ptsd about it but I get a bit uncomfortable around the subject.

>>580471209
holy fuck that sad. man tear'd.

>>580457548
Anyone have the whole pooping bandit story?

>>580460719
Got me.. Few manly tears there!

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>>580455496
Nigger

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>>580471803
Way ahead of you

>>580467403
Fuckining kek'd hard

>>580471714
Sorry to hear man :/

>>580469989
damn that's close

>>580472197
Oh don't be. I like being the person I am today. I'm pretty happy, both my brothers are doing well, I'm fairly well off and sometime in 2015 my girlfriend and I are going to look for a place together and I'm probably going to propose to her shortly after that. All in all I've come to realize that shit will always come at you and the best thing to do is let it slide off.

We need the bean boy, FUCK.

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>>580472923
got ya bro

>>580472893
Great to hear; hang in there man!

>>580473150
thank you man

>>580473150
This made me so confused

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Bump

>>580473842
Kek

>>580457301

This needs more recognition.

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>>580473842
what the actual fuck?

>>580472027
absolutely beautiful

>>580473842
why would any one want a dolfer with so many kevin spacey's?

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>>580460719
DDamn. I'm got.

>>580475031
dolfer ????what i just did?

>>580460719
www.youtube.com/watch?v=CnTGX9GlFPE

>>580475653
Hahahhaha yess

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One of the best,

>>580467215
literally hate every second until
>i came and started farting

>>580467403
fucking kek

>>580465135
i swear that is my uncle kenny

>>580464678
never fails to fucking disgust me

Finally! A good thread!

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>>580476126

Bump, I'm out of pictures ; (

>>580456093
wow thats sad