ITT: I make shitty soup awsome.
So we start off with 2 tablespoons of oil and 1 tablespoon of crushed red pepper. Always season you oil with your aromatics.
inb4 sperm
>>578873523
Go on op, you have my interest
Bump for interest
>OP
>>578873523
bump what kind of soup?
>>578873630
You're never supposed to reveal the secret ingredient.
bump
Next add a tablespoon of puréed garlic.
>>578874116
any dishit knows you should mash or slice the garlic yourself, not use pureed garlic
>>578874116
Why are you cooking sideways? Why is your shit not falling out the pan?
And most importantly, are you actually in space, OP?
>>578874116
http://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.hubatka.cz/hphotos-ak-prn1/44530_491807354174208_665546187_n.jpg my soup
>>578874039
>Secret
>not using semen in every dish you cook
>>578874379
Gtfo my steak
>>578874308
>http://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.hubatka.cz/hphotos-ak-prn1/44530_491807354174208_665546187_n.jpg
I will fuck your mother
>>578873523
what's aromatics? is it like a mattress? I don't want that in my soup
>>578874116
I make soup all the time. I want make even better soup than I make now.
therefore I'm bumping
>>578874541
Nice try she is dead
>>578874308
>http://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.hubatka.cz/hphotos-ak-prn1/44530_491807354174208_665546187_n.jpg
jumpscare warning
>>578874675
Whata afag, Heaven
>>578874675
>>578874541
>Following a link
>4chan
You deserved whatever it is.
>>578874541
You bastard.
Make sure that shit gets hot! Spread it around, bruh.
>>578874379
A secret is a secret because you don't tell people, not because it goes unused.
>>578874824
>>578874863
"waaah, mommy!"
okay babbys
>>578874884
why are you so fucking slow fgagot
>>578874675
fuck you heaven
Hurry up fgt
Now add your proteins.
Today I will be using diced bacon and a few shrimp.
Fuck this! I'm makin a sandwich!
>>578875174
sure we can swap right after i'm done fucking you
>make sure the balls don't touch!
>>578875341
look good so far, op.
>>578875341
>Bacon
>Shrimp
Oh sweet jesus tell me more. I'm almost there.
>>578875341
Yes...
buhhmp
>>578875341
>adding two meats with different cooking times at once
you fucked up
>>578875341
Please post smells for my face
>>578875429
fuck you as well anonymous my dad owns microsoft he will ban you
>pic related
keep going OP now lets see the dog turd
Squeeze a lemon in their cuz acid will compliment this.
>>578875652
>>578875341
yeah bro u shoulda rendered that bacon off a little first then cooked the shrimp in the bacon fat. would've given the bacon a better texture in the soup and you wouldn't be overcooking the shrimp which are pretty delicate even in a soup. faggot.
>>578875652
The bacon is already cook & shrimp takes 40 seconds. Wait until you taste it to fucking nay say it, flapjack
>>578875741
don't stop op, i'm getting hard
I think I'll add some red onions and sliced bell pepper as well.
>>578876085
should have diced peppers and onions
>>578876163
But then you don't get the crisp feeling of biting into the big pieces
>soup
>>578876085
Are onions really needed?
>>578876267
a good reason to dice them.
You alreayd have crush from shrimp and bacon...
>>578876324
onions are always needed
Flip it! And shit. Do some bad ass tricks and back flips.
>>578876412
damn son, op's a badass.
One table spoon of unsalted butter and a pinch of salt and pepper.
>>578876412
>>578876412
dont flip it unless you want to play 52 food pick up
>>578876412
>bad ass tricks and back flips
Op finish this shit I'm hungry
>>578876937
Do you want it to taste awesome or not?
>>578873523
Unless you're gonna fuck that soup go to /ck/
>>578876773
this looks like a good drunk meal, goonna try it this weekend after getting wasted
>>578876937
Yeah maybe if you suck at flipping michael j fox looking retard
>>578876773
I think you mean kosher salt right op
Two fingers of a dry white wine. I'll be using a Chablis.
>>578877241
>2014
>not using seasalt exclusively
>>578877389
Whatever you are making, and how ever it tastes, it's not soup
>>578877241
Winter salt that you spread on your driveway
>>578877392
Sea salt doesn't hav iodide.
>>578877523
This.
Where the fuck is the broth?
Stills sounds good doh.
Yes kosher salt. Now quit distracting me. Fuckers.
>>578877523
All he has to do is dump this pan into any kind of broth and then it's soup. That's all it takes to turn anything into soup.
>>578877392
Accurate image. Enjoy your goiter.
>>578877780
Urine
>>578874068
Fuck off Vladimir
>>578877943
still a soup faggot
>>578877780
So if i shit into a soup
does it turn into a shit soup
>>578878042
Yes.
Soup + anything is still soup.
Now here's the part you guys will chastise me for. The soup.
>>578873523
>>578874116
>>578874884
>>578875341
>>578875741
>>578876085
>>578876412
>>578876773
>>578877389
>>578877762
Are you going to pee in it or what, I ain't got all day.
>>578878160
lmao. Awesome.
>>578878042
There's only one way to find out anon
>>578878042
Yes. You could dump icecream into broth and call it icecream soup.
>>578878160
NIGGER WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?
>>578878160
here we go
>>578878160
>>578878160
>>578878160
disappointment
>>578878160
!!!!!!! I'm actually ok with this.
>>578878160
>>578878160
plz dont OP
>>578878160
>>578878160
I said I was making shitty soup awsome
>>578878160
at first I was gonna give you shit about that, but then suddenly... I want ramen now
>>578878160
You are just a poor trailer trash pleb in the kitchen
>>578878482
I mean it's a complete waste of that beautiful food you made, but I'm sure it still tastes good as fuck
>>578878598
im still very interested, continue
>>578878160
FUCKING KEK
>>578878598
What the fuck, ain't you gonna prepare it separately?
>>578878598
>dumping raw fucking noodles into the pan
saw that comming
>>578878182
MFW Ive seen this nigger for about an hour today
>>578878160
oh, nice, i like korean Shin Ramyon.
Add your water and seasoning packet.
>>578878598
That looks mighty fine OP
>>578878598
why the fuck did you put raw noddles in it?
>>578878958
and the seasoning packet, too
jesus
>>578878985
Why'd he also put raw shrimp in there fucking retard?
f5-f5-f5-f5-f5-f5
I MUST SEE THE END RESULT
>>578878598
why not just make awesome soup for the same price, damn it op
>>578878985
Because they cook in the boiling soup.
>You rely on your parents to cook for you
>>578878958
Not even shirmp ramen?!?!?!
>>578878958
If you're going to use ramen in shrimp soup at least use the fucking shrimp flavor
add REAL soup, not fucking stir fried noodles
>>578878835
Those noodles aren't raw. They have been fried and dried.
>>578879103
all shrimp is raw before you cook it dipshit
Jesus tittyfucking Christ those burners are fucking disgusting. Clean your cooktop OP.
inb4 this concoction of foods creates mustard gas and kills OP
>>578878958
Oh fuck I get it now! Food boner re-engaged
Simmer till noodle is tender, son.
>>578874308
>http://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.hubatka.cz/hphotos-ak-prn1/44530_491807354174208_665546187_n.jpg
So hot. Post more.
>>578878958
Minus this, OP.
I will be trying it.
Looks delicious, thanks.
>>578879349
i like this
>>578879349
Diarrhea bruh
>>578879349
NOW jack off into it
>>578879349
>starts to slow clap
bump
This thread is epic.
>>578878598
Still a bit interested. To your credit you said shitty soup - made awesome.
I sometimes sneak the flavor packs of ramen into my quick soups or dinners. Here's a little secret EVERYONE LIKES IT.
No shit - I've served posh ass motherfuckers soup that had ramen flavor packs in them & they slopped it up.
That said, I know how to make a proper soup. It's just funny how people will trash ramen & then slurp it up with a smile.
>>578879271
HENCE THE FUCKING COMMENT, jesus fucking cancer
try reading some insight past your 4th grade reading level
>>578879314
Nerve gas
>>578878598
I can only imagine how this tastes.
>Chicken flavor
>Shrimp flavor
>Bacon flavor
>All meld together into a confused meat broth
>>578879349
I would absolutely eat this
For the love of god, anons that can cook please post easy recipes that a retard such as myself can follow that won't taste like shit in my mouth
>>578879349
That actually looks pretty fucking good.
Now jack off into it.
>>578879349
i take it back, this actually looks pretty good.
>>578879726
please yes
>>578879349
Now shove it up your ass OP!
>>578879664
I agree it looks fucking tasty.
>>578873523
nice job op
>>578879726
Buy a crock pot. Every decent crock pot recipe online is easy as shit and delicious.
>>578879349
looks so fuckin tasty
>>578879726
all normal white man food is tasteless
you need to learn the curry
Garnish with parsley and chow down. Tastes just like gumbo or jumbiliya. I'll be back tomorrow with more wacky recipes. Peace, fuckers. I got work to do.
>>578879859
Do you just throw shit into it and let it sit? then eat the fuck out of it?
>>578879497
It's not the taste of Ramen that i dont like about it.
it actually tastes good and reminds me of my childhood.
It's the 0 fucking nutritional value it has.
I just cant eat it any more as a source of food. I will eat it, sometimes 2 packs. And I will be hungry in 20 mins.
>>578878160
could someone save this? this looks fucking delicious
Good Job OP. I'm out!
>>578879989
Oh my gawd, I have so many feels right now
>>578879989
can you make scrambled eggs next?
>>578879989
Write a fuckin book OP
>>578879989
i liked it thanks
>>578879989
>no piss
kinda dissapointed
>>578879989
>>578877389
>>578877762
>Dat stove
>Dat squeeze bottle
>dat kosher salt
>all dat stainless steel
you are in a professional kitchen arent you?
>>578879349
Looks like paella at this stage.
>>578879989
Nice recipe faggot. Used to do this often when living with roommates, we called it NINJA RAMEN!
Still do it sometimes.
>>578879991
Sometimes there's an extra step or two down the road, but for the most part yeah. Start it in the morning, go to work or whatever, and in the evening you have a delicious meal.
I'm eating some left over chicken soup I made in it. It was literally just 4 chopped chicken breasts, a large can of cream of chicken soup, a large container of chicken broth, and butter. Cooked for 6 hours on low, added egg noodles, then cooked for about 45mins to another hour and it's delicious as shit.
>>578879726
This is one of my favorites that I came up with when we were low on food. Super fucking fast and tastes way better than you would expect.
>Can of tuna
>Tortilla
>Miracle whip or mayonnaise
>BBQ sauce
>Ranch dressing
>Lettuce
>Dump can of tuna into a bowl
>Mix in miracle whip and BBQ sauce to your liking, but I advise using a tiny-ass squirt of BBQ, just enough to add a bit of flavor.
>Mix the shit out of it until it is paste-like
>Put it on the tortilla
>Slap lettuce on there
>Give it a squeeze of ranch
>Wrap it up and eat it
I have tons of these shitty recipes because for the longest time all we had to eat was canned food and the basics.
>>578879989
thank you op you are a gentleman and a scholar
>>578880279
You better fucking believe I screen capped every single post by OP on my phone for future consumption.
>>578879726
This is actually easy as shit. Btw, ignore his filings and put some marmalade on there and sprinkle with powdered sugar when it's rolled up.
can someone make a screencap of the steps?
too lazy to do it myself
>>578879989
you magnificent motherfucker
>>578879989
>>578880279
http://4archive.org/b/thread/578873523
>>578879726
Cut up some broccoli, cut up some potatos, chop up some onions.
Boil them until they start to get mushy, add salt, garlic, basil.
Put it in a blender. Add a bit of cream.
You just made broccoli cream soup.
I've got more. But I'll take time to type them properly, unlike this one.
>>578879989
Can also add a half a can ov v8 for more flavor.
What, a good thread on /b/??? You have my respect, sir!
Will be dumping some of my foodstuffs
1/?
>>578878958
ch...chicken flavor with shrimp?...you monster.
>>578879349
ADD THE JIZZ!!!!
>>578881021
I made this once in college after seeing it on here. It's disgusting. I couldn't finish a whole one.
>>578877762
>>578879989
God dammit, I swear I fucking work wherever you are...all this shit that looks so damn familiar
>>578880465
Here's one that my buddy made up and it's actually pretty decent.
>1 Can of tuna
>1 large potato or 2 small
>Cheese
>Mayo
>BBQ sauce
>Cut the potato up and put into microwave for 4 minutes
>When done, put in the rest of the stuff to your liking
>Mash it all up with a fork until it's all a uniform pasty stuff
>eat
Manage an Italian resteraunt. I now have work to do. Late /b/.
2/?
>>578879989
Needs egg bro
>>578881234
bye
this is why i browse /b...random posts like this
>>578873523
>soup
>oil
>crushed red pepper
Did you mean make it shitier?
4/?
>>578880465
Here's two more recipes for poorfags, both with rice and broccoli.
I call this one "Potato salad except the potatoes are rice instead"
>Instant rice
>Dill weed
>Miracle whip
>Broccoli (frozen or fresh, i don't give a fuck)
>Literally just cook the rice and broccoli any way you want
>Mix them together
>Use as much miracle whip and dill weed as you like, just taste it as you go
>Eat at room temperature
Next
>instant rice
>Worcestershire sauce
>Your favorite seasoning
>Rice
>Same as last recipe, cook the rice and broccoli any way you want
>Mix that shit together until it tastes good
>eat it
>>578881225
Nice. I'll have to try that.
>>578880465
All the momentum OP just gained from his souptastic voyage into my heart, was just obliterated by your suggestion of "food".
I can literally smell the tuna/mayo/ranch/bbq clusterfuck you Great Value ingredient usin nigger
>>578881557
good job faggot
>>578881572
forgot to list broccoli in the 2nd recipe
>>578880073
>>578879726
Soups are easy as fuck, but usually take time unless you've got broths prepped up.
For an easy soup do this:
> 2cups chicken or beef broth in hot sauce pan depending on what meat you're using.
> Add chopped mushrooms stirfry veg or whatever blows your hair back
> Onions last if you like em a bit crisp.
> High heat rolling boil. about 2 min
> Toss in your proteins any meats you had left over or saute meats, shrooms, & onions ahead of time then add to broth with liquids from saute
> Let boil about 1 or 2 min.
Here's the good part.
>crack egg into your soup bowl
>Pour scalding soup over the egg
>Gently stir for 15 sec so you get the whites flaking off
>Then mix the yoke into the broth - Delicious.
>>578879989
>>578873523
Ok, that's a nice dish and i sometimes buy ramen just for those noodles [many uses, they even can go well with scramble eggs], but really, seasoning pack over your own set of spices? You started uot so nicely with that pepper and garlic, i think that pack was uncalled for.
>>578881643
Thanks nerd
5/?
>>578879104
newfag
>>578881234
Make us a recipe book pls OP
>>578873523
>soup on a frying pan
>>578881234
Good work, OP.
6/?
>>578881234
thanks OP
Ingredients:
> can of tuna
> chicken flavor ramen
> a potato
> carrots
Just cook up the ramen as usual, and simmer the potatoes and carrots, (or other veggies) separately, although you could probably do them together. Then add the tuna and boiled veggies to the noodles. Bam, done. (You could sub a can of chicken for the tuna, I just used tuna because its what I had on hand. It doesn't taste to bad if you're broke)
7/?
>>578881572
Also, another good one for really poorfags is to make any kind of tomato sauce pasta but replace the noodles with canned greenbeans. Saved my ass so many times when we didn't have noodles but I was craving spaghetti and meatballs.
8/?
>>578882010
Yes - sauces & soups are oft made in saute pans
>>578879989
Prison soup, next up, prison burritos.
>>578878160
i kawked
9/?
>>578878958
>>578879989
why the FUCK would you ruin a perfectly nice soup base with that goddamn MSG laden ramen garbage?
Wine makes for the perfect stock with some water and salt - plus the bacon and veg creates a stock of its own ... so you really don't need that fucking ramen at all.
would be more delicious and more healthy without it. my opinion. i know most of you retards would disagree.
Archive request plz. So many chad ducking keks itt
10/?
>>578874675
>.jpg
>click to activate Adobe Flash Player
OK
(holy shit. capcha: theyurge influence)
illuminati confirmed on 4chan
oh gawd..
this is some hella-shit trailer trash szechuan.
fuck u OP fag.
>>578882296
Oh god this will be the way I die.
>>578874068
BYLAT!
don't forget this, i've been hooked on it since 2001
11/?
>>578879726
Made this image last night while cooking.
Day before payday food
12/?
>>578875591
You gave me a kek m9
>>578882713
Holy shit, that recipe will turn women into men!?!?
>>578874267
this. we slice our garlic before we blend it with oil to make our garlic butter.
>op is a fag and has no clue what he is doing.
13/?
>>578883145
Bookmarked the website, gonna order some when I get paid. How is it??
14/?
>>578876394
kek
>>578881403
Why not just throw those ingredients down all at once, then throw a slice of bread on top?
15/?
love this thread
it's the slow hook that catches the spooky fish
16/?
>>578877389
Where da onions at?!
17/?
>>578883628
I use it the most on chicken and usually fried eggs but it goes well on almost everything, don't get the salt free brand it's not as good as the original. It's hard to explain what it actually tastes like, it's a really different type of salty flavor but I fucking love it
18/?
>>578883139
its wrong. Correctly will be "Blyad`"
>>578884183
made this once before - protip: add salted butter, otherwise it tastes like asshole
also keep them coming please based anon
>>578879989
Well done OP
>>578880389
Yeah he is.
19/?
>>578884371
No, retard. correct would be блять.
20/?
>>578884270
I dont use salt free anything, I fucking love salt. I've been using some random ass cajun seasoning I found one night, but the ancient Greek spice thing really caught my interest.
>>578879989
Im going to cry. Its so beautiful.
>>578882584
Prison food usually has lots of the packets of flavoring with the noodles being prepared in a variety of ways. Nowhere does shrimp ever become part of prison food.
>>578884552
No ur wrong
>>578881803
Trying omlette mode now
21/?
>>578879989
Why did you even add the ramen noodle? It's soup. Soup doesn't NEED noodles, much less shitty noodles. Also how are you so poor you opt for bad noodles over actual pasta?
6/10
>>578884631
Tony Chacheres
22/?
>>578884798
Where did you come from?
>>578885002
your mom's vagina
>>578881021
>mfw hamdog
>>578885124
Nah, that would be me.
>>578882936
Cheap, don't have to cook it for 20 hours, also ramen noodles are literally just regular noodles...
>>578884552
ты ебан, чтоле? Кто говорит бляТь? Д там!
>>578883446
Oh and you do? They use mashed garlic in alot of restaurants, it's quite easy and practicly the same.
I worked in different restaurants they used it.
Learned in cooking school to use it
>>578884952
moar pls
>>578885504
Mate, pick a language you actually speak before trying to teach me how to curse in Russian.
It's not д, it's т. No one writes it like that. Check a dictionary.
>>578884952
Keep posting
>>578879989
>i got work to do
frig off, cyrus
How does everyone make their beef stick together so well?
>>578885780
That's fucking gross.
No wonder Amerifats are fat.
>>578885779
a tut pacany po ruski gavit shtole
>>578885780
Step seven: heartattack
>>578886053
USA beef, 50% flour.
Epic Thread.
ARCHIVED.
>4archive.org/b/thread/578873523
Anyone else think of this?
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Xh_IlJj0hqY
>>578878598
fuck you OP I'm out
>>578885780
>cover with cheese
Great thread, dont stop.
>>578885779
Блядь - это "женщина легкого поведения", а блять "восклицание". Понял, пиндос?
>>578886187
Are you shitting me? That sounds like it'd burn like a motherfucker.
>>578886132
>>578886160
>>578886383
kek
>>578877762
op will you marry me? this looks amazing
i love you
Sorry, ducked out for a smoke
23/?
>>578874675
I still clicked it.
It was cool tho...
>Get cat wrap in sausage.
>Enjoy
24/?
>>578886134
>Mate, pick a language you actually speak before trying to teach me how to curse in Russian.
Read that again.
>>578886456
Sure, fagwad. Whatever you say. He was indeed trying to say slut and not fuck.
Yes, yes.
25/?
I love you.
>>578880389
He's probably in a college that does prof cook courses.
>>578886673
what is it, god damnit?
26/?
fuck captcha
>>578886771
Ну и хуле ты пиздишь что-то, ебана?
>>578875341
>meat
dropped
>>578887310
American food is disgusting you people disgust me