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Tell me, /b/, what do I text my Mom?

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 273
Thread images: 32

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Tell me, /b/, what do I text my Mom?
>>
>>576041017

dick
>>
>>576041017
diapers, laxatives and a packet of condoms.
>>
>>576041208
WINRAR
>>
>>576041017

Mega Stuff Oreos
>>
>>576041017
pick up some sexy undies so I can fuck you tonight
>>
"I want you ;)"

Is she hot?
>>
>>576041208
Early win
>>
>>576041017
half a water melon, half a water melon, super glue
>>
>>576041017
battetoads
post cards
Jackie Chan
>>
>>576041017
Sharpies, oh...and mom? Come home soon.
>>
>>576041208
>>576041325
OP reply pleas
>>
>>576041017
"I Want a huge cup of your female ejaculate in my face. Please mom, let me fill your fartbox with semen and watch you shit it onto your own face. oh , and some milk please."
>>
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What now?
>>
>>576041017
Zucchini, hand lotion, men's fitness magazine
>>
>>576042020
sorry autocorrect, I meant lube
>>
>>576042020
Do you want me to wear a condom on my dick next time?
>>
>>576042020
Mom I'm so horny. Can I please lay my seed in you tonight
>>
A bucket of horse semen, and a pack of condoms.
>>
I want DICK, mother.
>>
jking just take a banana and some condoms pls
>>
>>576042173
winrarrrrrrrr
>>
Just kidding, unless you want some dick... I got some here if you hurry back ;) ;)
>>
I could come along, we could pick up some dick together.
>>
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>>576042173
winrar
It will be funny
>>
>>576042173
winrar
>>
I've been hiding it for to long mom. I've wanted to fuck you ever since I was 15. Come home soon so I can fuck your ass. Also, buy lube ;)
>>
>>576042020
A dildo, a dick.

what are you fucking stupid?
>>
>>576041017
pillow case dog tape
>>
>>576042483
dude
>>
So many instawinrar tonight. Deliver OP. Better be your mom too.
>>
>>576042483
op wont to much of a pussy
>>
>>576041017
a new mom
>>
>>576042173
>>576042173
winrar
>>
>>576042483
So, like 3 months?
>>
>>576042483
Pick this one over the other one imo.
This will get you laid
>>
>>576042020
op deliver
>>
>>576042823
with their powers combined...
>>
>>576041017

A bag of cheetos mommy.
>>
>>576042823
Gotta pick the first winrar
>>
>>576041017
>>576042483
do it op
>>
Spotted dick. It's a dessert.
>>
>>576042483
inb4 op is too much of a faggot to deliver
>>
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Here we go again.
>>
>>576043095
Of course he's too much of a faggot
>>
>>576043149
I dont wanna stop.. Mom I've been turned on by you for years now.. I need your body mom please
>>
Mother, I've wanted to guzzle your anal juices since I laid eyes on your perfect figure
>>
"I really want you mom..."
>>
Call it off dude. They know, that was funny tho
>>
>>576043149

Let's get serious for a minute. I want to penetrate you hard and deep. Let me be the father of your inbred retard baby. You have no idea how long I've been waiting for this.
>>
no i'm texting you mom. i want to stuff my meat in your ass
>>
>>576043149
Let me anal you gently, sweet mother.
>>
>>576041017
mom, im serious. I havent jacked off in months. Ive got enough cum to feed you for a week, so what do ya say?
>>
>>576043149
SHIT IM SO SORRY MOM, my friend got a hold of my phone and started texting weird shit.
Anyway, can you pick me up some of your vagina from the store?
>>
Mom, I want to have sex with you
>>
Send a dick pic.
>>
Don't make me rape you... Mom
>>
OP DELIVER
WINRARRRRRR
>>
>>576043149
No mom I meant to send it to you. I find you extremely attractive and I would love to place my seed in you tonight. Please mom I thought about this for a long time and I really want to show you my love.
>>
>>576043149
please just get me condoms so i can use them on you tonight.
>>
You wont be telling me to stop later :3
>>
>>576043149
Get your strapon ready... I can take it all
>>
>>576043283
come on op send a dick pic to her.
>>
>>576043149
>implying this is actually your Mom.
You sure got us buddy.
>>
No mom for real. I want to drown you in my semen and pump my tiny meat puppet in your brown tunnel of love
>>
>>576043149
Mom do you play minecraft?
>>
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Mom i'm a faggot, forgive me
>>
>>576043378
THIS
>>
Come on mom, you know you want it.
>>
>>576043389
re-roll
>>
>>576043465
WINRAR
>>
>>576043149
So I texted "mom" to the wrong number. Let me try again... Mother dearest. I came from your pussy and I want back in.
>>
>>576043149
i want to taste your pussy juces again, mom.
>>
>>576043465
Winrar!!
>>
>>576043149

Dude that's awesome.
>>
>>576043465
winrar
>>
>>576043545
Send pic too
>>
>>576043465
Holy shit i win everything
>>
>>576043465
winrar
>>
No right person...answer the question mom
>>
>>576043442
rerolling
>>
Send dick pic
>>
>>576043527
Kekking hard irl, reroll
>>
>>576043465
Winrar, but don't do the faggot ":3".
>>
>>576043605
two winrars, is this a 4chan dream :*^)
>>
>>576043482
Nice Id there.
>>
ITT: OP ruins his relationship with his mom
>>
>>576043149
no mom I'm serious
>>
>>576043675
>>576043465
With these combined
>>
>>576043465
WINNeR
>>
>>576043149
come on guys how can there be so many gullible ppl in this thread, this obviously isnt real guys
>>
>>576043465
WINRAR
>>
ayy lmao yo pussy be like sunny delight, its the good stuff kids go for.
>>
>>576043919
It's fun nevertheless
>>
>>576043919
ignorance is bliss nigger
>>
>>576043919
play along faggot
>>
>>576041017
>>576041208
>tfw first reply is winrar
>>
>>576043919
*bored ppl
>>
>>576043919
Not gullible... We know, we just like to have fun nig
>>
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>>
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>>576043919
>implying anything on 4chan is real
>>
>>576041017
Op u only have to wait 30 sec...get with it already
>>
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The plot thickens
>>
Op, he be a fag
>>
>>576044482
hes having problems coming up with replies
>>
>>576044607

Good idea, I want him there to watch
>>
>>576044607
Dad already knows..
>>
I'm going to shove my dick in you.
>>
Send her this faggot
>>
I'm okay with a threesome ;)
>>
It's okay though, he can join us too
>>
>>576044607
Please dont call, I just need you..
You have been driving me crazy with that amazing body of yours mom
>>
>>576044607
send a dick pic op show her you really love her.
>>
But mom, i really love you, and i want to take this to the next level.
>>
Dad already knows
>>
>>576044607
Ooh can Dad join us and make a threesome?
>>
>>576044607
Dont call him. Just think about the fun we could have. And he would never find out. Dont you want my cum in your ass?
>>
no please dont, i dont want this to be a 3way.

also send a pic of your dick
>>
>>576044607
Dads dead...
>>
I came in the panties your wearing today. How does that make you feel?
>>
>>576044607
And who do you think is helping?
>>
>>576044607
Mom, I'm not asking for a threesome. Just you, me and the whipped cream ;)
>>
>>576044607
BITCH DONT CALL THAT FUCKING CUNT NIGGER. I WANT YOU

YOU ONLY

YOURE ALL I WANT TO FUCK ALL OF MY LIFE.
>>
>>576044607
Good he can watch while I give you a DEEP dicking.
>>
>>576044607
Roflmao.
"The plot thickens"
Op you're such a riot.
>>
>>576044607
"OH SHIT my friend was on my phone"
>>
op is full of shit but here goes:
Ask dad if the horse vagina was good?
>>
>>576044607
You know you've been having these feelings, too, Mom. Don't deny it.
Come home now and nobody has to know of our forbidden love.
>>
Dad knows, he's coming too. Can we penetrate you at the same time
>>
>>576044607
Im not really into threesomes
>>
hes waiting in bed for us
>>
>>576044607
Niggerjew analtits
>>
>>576044816
/roll
>>
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>>576044607
All you have to do is add yourself as a contact and delete the double messages
>>
>>576044607
can you buy me winrar?
>>
>>576044742
REROLL
>>
>>576044607
I am fake
>>
Sorry, mom. It was just a practical joke. Please don't call dad... He'll start touching me again. :(
>>
>>576044941
winrar
>>
Plz, just me and you. Dad fuck you every week
>>
>>576044607
I'll be sure to blow a load in his ass later after you
>>
Dad is ok with that, I asked him
>>
>>576044941
winrar, i guess
>>
>>576044607
Good, I want him to know that is own son is fucking his wife.
>>
>>576043575
Re-rawl
>>
Goddamnit Mom! Just let me give you the ol' lick-a-roo!
>>
I saw with that nigger last night cunt. Take my 4 inches or I rat!
>>
>>576044941
Winrar
>>
>>576044607
Good Dad can fuck me in the ass while I'm fucking you.
>>
>>576044941
winner
>>
>>576044607
stop avoiding the dick, you are gonna get it either way
>>
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>>576044607

How old is your mom OP?
>>
>>576044880
REROLL
>>
>>576044941
Fucking idiotic winrar
>>
>>576044607
Thats right, call dad...no ones gonna hear you...scream :3
>>
mom, please just wait. Havent you ever thought about me being inside you?
>>
>>576044941
hahah
>>
>>576044976
and you're a saging faggot
>>
>>576044941
Winrar!
>>
>>576045031
Lame winrar.
>>
>>576043389
bumping for this
>>
>>576044607
he already knows. We both wanna have a night of pleasure with you, true family love
>>
>>576044941
That's a winter
>>
>>576045165
bump with dick pic
>>
>>576045121
fag
>>
>>576043605
WINRAR
>>
>>576044816
Roll. Also with dick pic say, "so am I bigger then dad?"
>>
>>576043782
thanks
>>
>>576044976
Who is Today? what a weird name
>>
Just kidding mom I want a bag of cheetos.
>>
>>576045389
im calling op out as a bitch if it doesn't happen
>>
Can you tell dad to pick up some fried chicken? Because I am also a nigger now
>>
>>576045512
He took a screenshot and that's in the photo app
>>
Post already
>>
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>>576045440
Jew
>>
>>576044816
roll
>>
>>576045389
lets see this winrar
>>
>>576045626
Look!! It's me Heaven and I'm a raging faggot!!!
>>
>>576045527
Between me amd you we can make op send his mom a dick pic if we try
>>
>>
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>>576045925
faggot
>>
Reason OP is taking so long, is because hes doing multiple threads at once.

Just look:

>>576041017
>>576038704
>>576043289

OP is always a faggot.
>>
>>576045995
bet that i think op is a beta pussy
>>
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>>576044941
>>
Op you give me a semi and then leave? You're the reason Ebola is still prevalent faggot.
>>
ABANDON THREAD! OP IS A FAGGOT!
>>
OP is kill

>dad kilt
>>
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Let's keep this going.
>>
>>576046176
How can his phone battery be on 90% and 7% at the same time?
>>
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>>576046453
everyone exept him is a faggot
>>
>>576046176
Retard, none of the carriers are the same.
>>
>>576046558
Can we meet in private?
>>
>>576046587
Because this thread is fake and gay, if you had not already remarked.
>>
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>>576046558
>>
>>576046558
ok, everyone, he is confirmed a faggot
abandon thread

we didnt get our winrar

plot never intesified

op pussied out

nothing to see here

faggot, op

now i want ur dad to kick ur faggot ass
>>
>>576046558
You're welcome. Now show me that ass ya fuckin cunt
>>
>>576046558
Look mom you are going to get the dick tonight no matter what. Either you spread them legs and let me in willingly or I will be raping your tight asshole.
>>
Mom, let me fuck you in the asshole. You won't regret it. I've dreamed about this for years
>>
>>576046558
Mom, I just want to grab your tits and twist your nipples like I twist my nipples masturbating to your pictures.
>>
>>576046558
-+don't be a beat bitch op send "mom" a dick pic and tell her you really love her and jerk to her cooking dinner
>>
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>>576046558
>>
kekekekekek

"I felt dad touch me in my sleep when i was little and was too scared to tell you"
>>
I'm gay. (fore you)
>>
Rubbers. Magnum ;)
>>
Give me your pussy
>>
im really drunk mom
>>
>>576043724
This
>>
>>576046962
Re-roll
>>
find a huge dick on the internet and ask if she likes it
>>
>>576047120
winrar
>>
>>576047028
pls
>>
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>>576047120
>>
>>576046558
Let me lick your sweet cunt, mom.
>>
>>576047120
Winrar
>>
>>576046558
I was on PCP the other night, and i saw that we had to fuck. Let me rim you, eat your salad, cum inside you and have babies.
>>
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>>576047120
lame winrar
>>
>>576047285
/roll
>>
Can you send me a picture of your tits? I'm trying to cum and I really want to see them.
>>
>>576047120
WINRAR
>>
>>576047120
>>576043724
win
>>
>>576047120
10/10
PERFECT WINRAR THREAD
OP PLS DELIVAR
we also want a timestamp of you and your phone
>>
>>576047421
IF U DONT GIVE US THE WINRAR I WILL FIND U AND UR FACEBOOK AND U WONT LIKE ME OP

SEND UR DICK TO UR MOM FAGGOT
>>
Your all very welcome, shame op is a pussy...
>>
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Op deliver
>>
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>>576047421
if you pussy out, send her this and say "im ready to go if you are?
>>
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Can anything top this?
>>
>>576047939
le epic troll
kill yourself, op
>>
>>576047305
How the fuck is op sending his mom a dick pic a lame win? Nigger you're dumb.
>>
>>576047386
>>
>>576047939
yes a valid answer you faggot
>>
>>576047939
Faggot detected
>>
>>576047939
could you be more nigger
>>
Really??!! Abandoning thread, op you faggot.
>>
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>>576047939
>>
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>>576047939
OP you're a fucking faggot stop fucking texting yourself you attention-whoring cunt
>>
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>>576047939
GG NO RE

OP just trolled the fuck out of us
>>
>>576047939
Are you fucking serious you nigger? Go kill yourself faggot, i'll rekk ye mom m8 u fookkin wankiiiiir.
>>
mom send me nudes or ill kill myself
>>
>>576047939
Fucking faggot
>>
>>576045291
>>576045626
>>576045925
>>576046152
>>576046176
>>576046453
Fuck you heaven.
>>
>>576047939
Let me spell it out for you: suck my balls, Im running away!
>>
>>576048116
>>576047939
Op don't do that you nigga
>>
>>576047939

I want to go bak inside your vajayaj
>>
I've wanted to bang you since I got my first pubic hair
>>
And this thread sarted off so well
>>
i want to fuck you tonight mom
>>
>>576047939
Mom...I've got something really important to tell you....
>>
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FAGGOT OP SEND THE DICK PIC OR I'LL RAPE YOUR DREAMS
>>
Send her a picture of your dick
>>
That was fucking lame dude
>>
>>576048376
Op take this
>>
>>576048116
boom
>>
OP deliver for /b/. don't be a bitch
>>
>>576047939
Mom, just wanted to say, I love you more than I probably should, if you catch my drift
>>
>>576047939
Look mom you are going to get my dick no matter what. Either you are going to spread them legs and let me get some of the sweet nector or I'm going to shove my dick so far up your ass whoever can pull it out will be called king arthur.
>>
>conversation empty
nigger have you ever spoken to your mom
>>
>>576048376
Winrar
>>
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>>576048376
>>
>>576047939
Look mom, lrts just mess around one time and see if you like it. Im really into eating milf asshole and getting pegged, you fucking me with a strap-on. If you want I've been saving my money and I can give you $1500 plus ill buy an 8 ball of coke. What do you say?
>>
>>576048598
topkek
>>
>>576048376
>>576048376
>>576048376
>>576048376
>>576048376
winrar
>>
>>576048416
>>576048461
He fucking wont, he is a fucking pussy
>>
>>576048376
WINRAR AHAHA
>>
SEND HER A DICK PIC
>>
Im almost to the point of ip tracking OP for being a pussy.
>>
Stroke the shaft and swallow the gravy
>>
op deliver i want 2 sleep
>3:00 here
>>
>>576048936
Please do, let /b/ get revenge
>>
>>576049062
bump
>>
>>576048936
Please do.
>>
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>>576048936
do it, fuck wit
>>
>>576047939
I'm going to dox u on pastebin in t- 5 minutes

choose to do us justice and all i do is talk to ur mom.

Don't do us justice, and i talk to ur dad send him the conversation with my dick as ur pic.
>>
>>576048936
How the fuck are you gonna get a random 4chan posters IP?
Thread posts: 273
Thread images: 32


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