Anymore funny green text shit like this?

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>>562089825
do you mean greentext about skyrim? Because I've got that.

>>562090708
Any funny greentext is fine

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you're in luck then, friend I have like 15 stories from my Traveling with Lydia stories.

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>>562091513
fucking couriers

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if I don't decide to masturbate after this and the thread doesn't 404 I'll post my Kevin the Hedgehog stories.

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when skyrim first came out I saw a couple greentext stories that I couldn't fully understand because I didn't have it. I got the gist because typical rpg problems but I always felt left out.

Recently I got a copy of Skyrim and played the holy jesus out of it. These stories are some of my experiences and I'm always happy to share them, people seem to love them.

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nearing the end

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I made the right choice with this quest, there's really no companion like Lydia.

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skyrim

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>>562092575
that concludes my Traveling with Lydia stories.

If I see some response, I may stick around and post some more hilarious shit I've typed up

>>562091397
i like to do this. gather a bunch of ingredients and eat them all at once. its fun

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This.

>>562092996
lol I was in my house when I decided to do that and I thought "what the hell would my daughter think watching me cram all this random shit in my mouth?"

>Lucia is the best daughter
>Sophie too, their situations made me super sad

>>562093029
Legendary beta

Here, have some OC faggots

>Playing Skyrim
>Have good handle on how it works
>Played the fuck out of Morrowind and Oblivion
>Begin game, make character, etc. Have a godawful nightmare of a time killing the fucks in the first cave for some reason
>Make it through after 2 hours
>Figure it was a "Welcome to Skyrim, you're weak as fuck" type of intro
>Trucking along, doing my exploring shit
>Cross a stream, ambushed by a mudcrab
>Little nigger hurts, so I turn to kill it
>2 more flank me
>I die from a mudcrab gangbang
>Autosave was before the stream, back in town
>Dog comes running up to me, starts talking
>Seems like a cool guy, follows me around and doesn't afraid of anything
>Some fucking how, get to the first dragon battle within the hour
>Dog has followed me this whole time, faithfully
>Dog is tanking the dragon and not dying
>Like a boss
>Eventually kill the dragon, after fighting it for 1.5 hours
>Roommate walks in, asks how it's going
>Tell him how ungodfully hard Skyrim is compared to the other games
>"Have you tried changing the difficulty?"
>Forgot I could do that, go in to change
>Preset was "Master"
>The faggot had set my 360 profile's base difficulty to max
>I got raped by so many mudcrabs, and ran like a little bitch from Giants and huge cats

>>562092246
I have tears in my eyes from laughing. Please carry on

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>>562093913
fine have some of my childhood- Kevin the Hedgehog.

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I have a couple of OC Skyrim if you want them.

>Orcing up the place with dual wield axes and full fucking daedric gear.
>Become dragonborn, harbinger, archmage (somehow) and all that jazz
>Go through my haul of followers over time, killed Lydia first fucking chance i got
>3mainstream5me
>Find this fucking angel bitch in Riften
>Mjoll the Lioness
>Orc senses tingling, need to plough this bitch harder than i ploughed motherfucking alduin's ass
>Tells me about this sword, feel bad so being manly Orc I am, go retrieve this sword and this bitch becomes follower.
>After a while of travelling, seeing the sights, battling together and chatting over mugs of ale, i decide to propose the question
>Get on one knee in the good ol' Bee and Barb of her hometown
>Besides, ring giver was nearby so it was convenient
>She agrees to marry me, we get married next day, we decide to move into my pristinely built home in Morthal
>Her motherfucking friend follows her
>Aerin or some shit
>This bitch better not be cheating on me
>This Aerin follows her everywhere when I'm not fucking around
>Come home one night, wife's asleep in our bed
>Aerin's there, just staring
>Doesn't even notice my presence, just continues staring at my wife's sleeping body
>Killed that bitch for being a motherfucking rapist
>Wife gets pissy, starts attacking me with the fucking Volendrung hammer i gave her, decision regretted
>Finally kill her after long battle
>Mfw my wife got pissy because i killed her stalker

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sorry about the poor cropping on these

>>562089825
>inb4 reddit

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there's a lot of these stories. 7 more after this

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>>562094651
I should be amused at this combo length but it's a sign this thread may 404 soon

bump?

>>562094902
These are fantastic keep going

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fin

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lol it's always hard to know whether it's dead or if people are so enthralled by a story that it's quiet.
Here's some fanart somebody made in the thread

>>562095039
reading

Anyone got that Sims 2 Chin guy greentext story where he watched his best friend and crush fuck eachother and then burned her house down?

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>>562095039
enthralled, MOAR

>>562095039
Those were gr8 m8

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I have this collection of stories from a HS THREAD YEARS AGO WHOEVER PUT IT TOGETHER MADE IT A MESS SO GOOD LUCK READING

fucking caps key went on by mistake

>>562092665
I was in the thread when you were posting these. Such awesomeness man.

and here you have all of my 4chan legacy, save my sex stories

>>562090820
hfs my pc is drowning in coffee splutter

>>562093763
pussy!

/watch?v=RbXtoJLnkxs

keep going

>>562090506
>booryaku
>"no" hiragana at the beggining

>>562095273
Sir Bearington is always a good read.

>>562095265
I have those on my phone, but I'm on the work computer right now in a restricted area. They are fucking hilarious.

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>>562089825
I saw this today I capped it.

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>>562095617

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>Having killed Miraak, me and Throthgar head to the Honeybrew Meadery to get drunk off our asses
>Travelling with Throthgar, son of Bothgar, descendant of Edgar,? brother in law of Inar, second cousin of Falknar, slayer of Gulgar
>Get drunk and are kicked out
>We whine about how long we have been walking from Windhelm
>Decide it was finally time to buy a second horse so now we can both ride
>Get to barn in front of Whiterun and it's closed
>See something wiggle near a stack of hay
>Nude lady layed out on a patch of hay
>Poke her
>Nude lady wakes up and turns out to be some self centered bitch
>She wants to travel with us
>Take her
>She won't shut up as we walk towards the Whiterun gates
>Slap her and dismiss her
>Throthgar states that we should stop this adventuring crap and get some unlimited followers mod so that we can team up with an army of babes
>Ingor him for the rest of the walk home
>Get inside Whiterun
>"PAPA!"
"GOOD GOD, YOUNG LADY! Shouldn't you be in bed?"
>Give her the doll I've been holding from Solstheim that I wanted to give her
>"Thanks, Papa!"
>Give her a sweetroll I've been holding on to since I left Solstheim
>Can't sleep thinking about how stale it must be

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>>562097098
Dumping Chinman

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>>562098228

>>562094651
I just lost my shit imagining Hank Hill dealing with an autistic sonictard for a son.

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>>562098262

>>562098313
more

>>562098274
it's the initials of the filenames isn't it lol

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me to the rescue I guess

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and 5 of 5
didn't even know I had this, thank god I had them named

>>562099109
Found them both on here. Didn't save the names correctly, so they were a string of bullshit numbers. Thanks you based anon for finishing what my faggot ass couldn't.