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Rate my new pet, /b/

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 197
Thread images: 58

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Rate my new pet, /b/
>>
10/10
>>
>>557473584
fingernails/10
shitpet/10
8/10 overall if pic is retaken with him fighting for life crawling out of your ass
>>
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>>
devil smile
10/10
>>
>>557473584

Call him
The Reptile who Would Much Rather Be Back In The Swamp
>>
>>557474024

Probably not, considering that species doesn't live in swamps, you dumb cunt.
>>
>>557474024
Yeah I'm sure she'd rather struggle to survive than be fed and kept comfortable in a closed environment without natural enemies, diseases or parasites.
>>
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>>557474024
You're completely and utterly retarded.
>>
Also, my other geckos, while I'm at it.
>>
Some offspring.
>>
Offspring from last year.
>>
>>557474689
>>
>>557474761
>>
Are you some sort of reptile breeder?

Are you Slash?
>>
Itwillneverloveyouback/10
>>
>>557474905
I mainly breed arachnids, the geckos are just a side hobby.

No, I don't know who that is.
>>557474946
>Depending on pets for affection.
Please.
>>
>>557475109

>having a pet for any other reason
Please.
>>
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>>557475179
>thinking anyone will ever love you, pet or otherwise

I have bad news.
>>
>>557475179

Explain aquariums then
>>
>>557474246
>>557474385
>>557474440


Seems like I've hit a nerve.
Give her the option of going home, then you can call me names.
>>
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>>557475179
>Having pets to make up for your lack of social life.
Please.
>>
reptile is master race
>12/10
>>
>>557473584
wtf is that thing it looks cool
>>
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>>557475729
Then she would die.
>>557476027
Rhacodactylus leachianus.
>>
>>557476153
ill paypal you 10k to put this in your ass
>>
>>557475729

I called you names because you don't even know what habitat it belongs in. You'd probably throw a bunch of freshwater fish in the ocean.
>>
>>557475483

To see cool shit? They arent pets, they are attractions.
>>
>>557476790
Scolopendras are too defensive and fast to be put anywhere they don't want to be.
>>
I'm a little drunk and it makes me want to smoke mairjuana.
>>
I request moar.
>>
>>557477069
They're my qt widdle petsies.
>>
>>557477341
Tortoises do have a rather small cuddle factor, though.
>>
>>557477407

They're moe
>>
>>557475802

>turtles will never love you either

Did you dumb fucks not have puppies growing up. Its about creating a bond then feeling sadness when your best buddy who you love and who loves you passes on. When a turtle dies you go out and buy a fucking new one.
>>
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>>557477407
I'd like to lay atop a giant tortoise's shell and see what it does about it. Like some old 50+ year old tortoise. Galapagos tortoise or whatever that biggest ones are.

I hope that wouldn't be animal abuse.
>>
>>557477517

Legitimate question, are you autistic? You seem to be really upset that people enjoy things you don't.

Was your dog a registered emotional support animal?
>>
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>>557473584
Any tips on reptiles as pets? I really want to get one but they just seem so expensive and fragile.
>>
>>557477407
Look at this motherfucker and think again.
>>557477517
>When a turtle dies you go out and buy a fucking new one.
They outlive you.

That's not a turtle, shows how much your opinion is worth.
>>
>>557477659
The shell will invert and close around you - then digest you slowly. Seen it happen - the shell fuses closed once inverted, so without a blow torch, noone is going to be able to help you out of there.
>>
>>557477751
Not saying they're not cute.
But their physical aspects make most parts of their body rather pointless to pet.
>>
>>557474831
10/10
>>
>>557477701

>you seem to be really upset that people enjoy things you dont

summer pls go
>>
>>557477719
Keep them warm, special light, humid tank, food supplements (vitamins etc), careful with the food supply.
Read a book on the animal you want to buy before you buy it.

They are fragile, so find out how to take care of them before you have one.
>>
>>557478078

So yes then
>>
>>557473740
Did you read Amigara Fault? wow
>>
>>557474526
Holy fucking shit! They're cute as fuck! 10/10
>>
>>557477659
Nothing, tortoises don't give fucks.
>>557477719
There's a lot of hardy ones to start with, these for example.
>>557474831
>>557474761
>>557474689
>>557474571
It's not hard to take care of most reptiles, it's generally the experience you need to work with more 'defensive' species, you need to understand how they work before you get further into the hobby.
>>
>>557473584

want one of those for a long time myself/10

congratulations OP
>>
Fucking A, reptiles.

What's your favorite?
>>
>>557473584
What camera did you used to take the photos?
>>
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>>557477949
I don't see why you really want to pet animals, there's only a select few that understand/enjoy it.
>>557478116
Many don't like being too warm, many don't like humid environments, many don't require any sort of lighting.

Many are really hardy and can withstand a lot of abuse, these are the 'beginner' species.
>>557478261
It gave me an odd feeling.
>>557478263
I have one of the only couples in my country, I think.
>>
>>557473584
>Charming eyes
>Beautiful smile
>Obviously obedient
10/10 Would bang
>>
>>557478318
That's a weird looking reptile
>>
>>557478448

Komodo dragons are awesome but I'd never want to be near one.
>>
>>557475109
Jesus Christ m8,I have Arachnaphobia.I can't even imagine what it'd be like to be around a shit ton of them.
>>
>>557478394
I got lucky and was able to get it for a good price.
>>557478712
Nikon D3100.
>>557478448
Leachies are definitely my favourite right now.
>>
>>557478734
Not sure if you can generalize that for entire species.
I've got a freakin fish that enjoys being pet.
Or he's just dumb...
>>
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>>557477894
Holy shit - so that is how they consume major nutrients?

>>557478318
I was hoping it would give me a ride
>>
>>557473584
One of my fav animals, he looks so smug and chill. Total bro. 10/10
>>
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>>557479021
Because it's a M. balfouri.
>>557479195
Get over it then, there's nothing to be afraid of.
>>
>>557479176
Kind of have this odd fantasy of owning one. Cute little fucks.

>>557479214
I adopted this girl yesterday. Makes two so far. Own any?
>>
>>557479302
They don't do that, he's fucking with you.
>>
>>557477659
When I was about 7,my parents took me to the Zoo and they had one of those turtles there.I shit you not I rode on top of it.
>>
>>557479245
He's probably just badly bred and thinks you're a cleaner fish.

My girlfriend has a retarded ballpython that doesn't get stressed by anything but moist surfaces.
>>557479302
I'm not sure if they can carry the weight of a adult human.

Even if it could it would probably just lay around.
>>557479319
He was actually pretty freaked out because I just got him, they don't like new environments.

It stared at me angrily during the transport.
>>
>>557479382
I have arachnaphobia too, but this guy just looks sooo fluffy....wanna cuddle him
>>
>>557479382
blue spider .. first time i see one
>>
>>557473584
Not reading the thread, cuz fuck it. But is that a legit Leachie, or did you go the "Poor Man's" route? Also, what island?

Pic semi-related, it's my 3 month old gargoyle gecko(which will only load sideways so...whatever)
>>
>>557479432
they shit on bath lol i have one lizard every time he make the biggest shit i see :D
>>
>>557479695
Maybe. Inbreds among fish aren't uncommon after all.
Still, it's cute, in a weird way.
>>
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>>557479432
No, I don't have enough space for iguanas, sadly.

Also, the look on his face during the transport.
>>
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>>557475802
Sup turtle bro. Awesome pets huh?
>>
>>557479941
the face is i want kill you
>>
>>557479432
Those are fucking /b/ro's.Parents used to have one when I was little.It climbed on the cealin an shit.10/10
>>
>>557480051
But it's not a turtle...
>>
>>557479941
Unfortunate. Probably my reasonable favorites. I got another, a green girl. One day and they're already friends.

I lived in Costa Rica for a while. Tons of these guys everywhere. Was pretty cool to see.
>>
>>557479702
A lot of people with arachnofaggia actually aren't afraid of tarantulas.
>>557479853
It's an actual leachie.
It's an Mt. Koghis Tröger-line .
>>557479918
My tortoise takes shits the size of it's body during bath time.
>>557479934
They're actually extremely common, you just don't hear about them often.

Fish breeding goes wrong a lot due to the high demand.

Pic is my tortoise enclosure.
>>
>>557480214
Youre right. Sorry. Its just that i have like 10 actual turtles so i dont really think of it as not a turtle.
>>
Do you do the professionally OP?
Give me some background info about yourself.You seem pretty cool.
>>
>>557480580
Post pictures of 'em!
>>
>>557480361
that is because tarantulas are a bit more laid back and chill. also they are bigger which makes it easier to deal with - I know sounds counter intuitive.

It's about the fast jerky undpredictable movement. Many other animals show clear signs of agression and you know when they try to fuck you up. Spiders are like swooshdiwoosh im over here now I'm overthere and now I bite you. Also their legs freak me out.

The bigger ones are not as "crawly" and look more like a hairy bro so I lik em.
>>
>>557479941
OP, as a dog owner, who's considered getting fish in the past, the amount of expression on that cheeky little shit's face has absolutely won me over
>>
>>557480798
Let me see if they are out. I had to move them to a smaller habitat so i could clean
>>
>>557473584
10/10 would pet
>>
>>557480361
tarantulas definitely don't freak me out as much as other spiders.Dont even know why.But,if I woke up with one on me I would have a panic attack and die.
>>
>>557480985
Yay, flippery shelly cuteness.
>>
I am the walrus
>>
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>>557480798
Heres a few of them. They are not very active this morning
>>
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Please don't kill me for liftin this from reddit. But this fucker is so damn cute. He only needs a tiny tophat and a monocle.
>>
>>557481440
Mind my asking of why you have ten turtles?
>>
>>557481440
Why aren't you sacrificing them for some free pizza?

/b/ will send you pizza if you smash em up and post the videos
>>
>>557481587
/b/ would actually probably dox his ask and get him arrested.We love animals now,Didnt you get the memo?
>>
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>>557480051
That's a tortoise m8.
>>557480279
I heard they sometimes lay in hotel rooms.
>>557480703
I'm a gardener.

Err, I'm 20 years old, look like a scrawny viking and have a lot of obsessive hobbies.
>>557480813
They actually show clear signs if you get into them.
>>557480959
They're also the most vocal gecko species, they make chicken sounds and stuff.

I was watering my tortoise enclosure, the plants are drying out due to the weather, it's 90F or something.
>>
>>557481790
octillery?
>>
>>557473584
Not a QT3.14 chameleon.
0/10
>>
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I'm also drying out due to my adaptions to the northernish climate.
>>
>>557481790
>chicken sounds

that fucking settles it, I'm gonna do this properly and start saving up. Will probably take a few months, but well done OP, you've won me over
>>
>>557481790
Well, I couldn't say from a tourist's point of view because I was living there. Mind you, it's a 3rd world country, so more shacks and less mansions.

Anyhow, what country do you live in?
>>
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>>557481790
I know that they too show signs, but for the ignorant everyday joe it probably is too subtle.

that photo though freaks me out - even more fast moving tiny legs - nope nope nope
>>
>>557481790
>emo centipede
More info OP.Howd you get into this,how much has it cost you,where have you gone,where do you acquire these lil guys,do you study reptiles in college,ect...
>>
>>557481843
It's a T. dollfusi.

I named it octillery, sadly she didn't live very long.
>>557481941
Chameleons are picky cunts.
>>
>>557479449
Thanks bro I was really getting scared of turtles for a second.
>>
>>557473584
10/pet would do some petting
>>
>>557482107
Did you*
>>
>>557482164
I see. I was thinking pokemon over here.
>>
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what island is it from? I have a NA/GT mix
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>>557481979
http://youtu.be/ntIc3RWNiUA?t=22s

They're expensive as fuck, I'm just saying.
>>557482028
The netherlands.
>>557482043
I wouldn't consider that fast compared to some spiders I've had to deal with in the past.
>>
>>557482164
Do spiders of this size have the mental capapility to recognize their owner and remember that he's not a thread and the "good guy"?
>>
>>557482668
Not a fan of scorpions either.Used to live in this place,they were everywhere.In my bed,in my fucking bathtub,in my shoes.
>>
>>557482668
Native or foreign? You seem very articulate.
>>
>>557479645
Omg anon, that's actually kind of cool.

Honestly I'm not even going to question how you were able to ride while at a zoo. Unless you're in some third world country.

Or Australia.

Anyway, living the dream, man.

Or should I say, mate?
>>
>>557482107
I've been interested in bugs and herps ever since I remember, I never really had a point where I got into it, because it was always there.
It doesn't cost me a whole lot outside of my 'personal pets' (non-breeding animals), it actually pays for itself.

Reptile expos/online/breeders.

No I'm an average normal gardener.
>557482551
>557480361
>It's an Mt. Koghis Tröger-line .
>>557482772
No they will attack/display defensive behaviour when provoked.
>>557482879
Send them to me.
>>557482914
Native, even though I'm relatively foreign in my way of doing things, the Dutch are typically very stubborn, sterile, boring people.
>>
>>557483697
I'm American.Im not sure how many zoos you've been to,but in alot of them they keep the giant tortoises out for people to play with.They keep a person by them and just let them walk around the zoo.They will also let you hold the Boas.
>>
>>557484137
too bad, so you can't really bro out with them? Maybe I should get a snakebro they seem pretty chill
>>
>>557484137
>You are more than the average Gardner,you are the super Gardner who uses his reptile minions to fight crime.
I have also had a fascination for reptiles from a young age.Snakes are the shit,lizards are downright cool.Ive never went as far as collecting though.The only lizard ive ever had was a gecko from florida.This thread makes me think I should start.Any recommendations on what breed I should get?
>>
>>557484735
I don't feel the need to 'bro out' with my pets anyway.

I like snakes, but I'm not interested in getting them any time soon because I don't feel like keeping dead mice in my freezer, and I don't have enough space for more pets other than tarantulas.

Pic related, shit's crowded.
>>
>>557485240
post me pic of you
>>
>>557485212
Species, we don't have breeds with reptiles, only morphs.

Leopard gecko's are a hardy starter, I breed them.
>>557474689
>>557474761
>>557474831
They're these things.

Easy to take care of, handable, and not smelly or noisy.
>>
Since nobody posted any chameleons,here is my 1yr old female veiled
>>
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>>557485439
Here.
>>
>>557485240
Awesome pic,
Well I like to bro out rom time to time.
You just have to get a really big snake and you don't need mice in the freezer, just let it out when the neighbour's kids a are playing .....
>>
>>557479432
I have a fuck ton of those on my island. Infact, so many, they are road kill every day.
>>
>>557482668
I have a ton of these on my island too.
>>
>>557485576
Holy shit bro,you legit look like a skinnier Thor from the avengers.
Thanks for the recommendation btw.
>>
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>>557485540
>Keeping chameleons in wooden enclosures with plexi glass slide doors.
It's going to die like that, mate.
>>
>>557485882
Its a huge enclosure,and only about 50% of it is wooden,got lots of plants in there and grass is starting to grow
>>
>>557485576
uhm I'm not saying I like you but you are kind a ...uhm cute...uhm....n-no h-homo
>>
>>557486026
Also lots of branches
>>
>>557485686
>>557485814
You have a private island?
>>557485864
No problem.

Also don't get it from a petstore, and do your research before getting it, it can easily be found on google.
Also don't believe everything you're told.
>>
10/10 would give a loving home
then again, i live in norway and this nigger country doesn't allow any reptiles
>>
>>557486026
That's 50% too much.

Chameleons require screen cages.
>>557486110
It's fine anon.
>>
>>557484375
I've honestly not been to many. Except through school trips. So the last time I was at a zoo was in early middle school (2004?)

Brookfield zoo and maybe some others, can't remember all names. Here in Chicago suburbs.

I couldn't imagine interacting with the animals so intimately that I could ride them, but maybe that was the fault of the chaperones I was with.

It was a mostly "watch and appreciate from a distance" type of thing, although

I can totally dig it though.
>>
cool lizard, are they expensive to keep? used to have snaked when i was little then my mum decided she didnt want to pay for them anymore and got rid.

what would be an easy lizard for a beginner and how much would it cost to start up and monthly maintenance?
>>
>>557486220
Got it.I don't want it to die on me.
Also,is there any reason not to get it from a pet store?
>>
>>557476153
You running speed boost/baton pass on that?
>>
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>>557486336
>2014
>Still living in Norway.
>>
>>557486507
I think there was a lot more I was going to say about this, but I can't remember.
>>
>>557486669
Those things freak me the fuck out.
They look like something that should not exist, not even in a horror movie...
>>
>>557486507
I can imagine why,you live in Chicago.Thats a huge city,I'm in the backwoods of Ky.Animals everywhere.
And yeah,it was probably the chaperones.Dont want the children in danger and what not.
You really should visit a zoo though,they're usually pretty cool.
>>
>>557486669
That's the fucking thing off of Hairy Potter
>mfw
>>
>>557486550
No, just expensive to get.

>>557485468
>>557486220

Feeding them costs me little to nothing, I breed Blaptica dubias.
Starting up a small colony will cost you about 10 bucks, and it'll be enough to last a life time if they're properly kept (and thus, breed)

I feed them remains of fruit and stuff that I ate.
>>557486587
They can take a beating.

Pet stores buy the cheapest species in bulk, which are often badly bred and raised in half-assed conditions, they're also the most expensive to buy them from and will pue a lot of misinformation out on you.

Breeders are easy to find, they're relatively common.
>>557486646
I don't understand.
>>
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>>557486947
They're actually harmless.
>>
>>557481583
I rescue them. Ive seen too many of them get hit by cars. All of my turtles have been picked up in high traffic areas
>>
>>557486646
>>557487193
Aight thanks.Also,the other bro is making a Pokemon reference.
>>
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>>557486947
kawaii spieder to the rescue
>>
>>557487301
MY FEAR IS NOT RATIONAL!
>>557487387
Spiders are ok, though.
>>
>>557487307
I do that to.I live in Kentucky,so every time it rains it seems like there is a billion turtles on the road.Saw a snapper bigger than my head once.
>>
>>557487301
I dunno why but this guy chillin looks so cute. Is he realxed? Cause he looks relaxed as fuck!

also, thanks for the pics, keep em coming, love em!
>>
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>>557487385
I see, that makes sense.
>>
>>557485576
Look pretty chill. Would discuss reptilian species with while tending to artificial biomes.
>>
>>557487970
What's the biggest spider you have Op?
>>
>>557487970
Do they come in Zerg and Protoss aswell?
>>
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>>557487742
No she just tolerated me holding her for a bit, they don't always tolerate it and never enjoy it or benefit from it in any way.
>>
>>557488250
It took me too long to figure out WTF was going on there. (Molt leftovers, right?)
>>
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>>557488008
I'm relatively relaxed.
>>557488175
This girl, currently, she's about 8 inch.
>>557482164
Planning on getting a T. blondi in the future.
>>557488194
Likely, they come in all shapes and sizes, some even have horns.
>>
>>557488583
stupid question but what do spiders do all day, just sit around?
>>
>>557488752
What do YOU all day?
>>
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>>557488546
It's a shed skin, they need to shed their ecoskeleton in order to grow.

Not my picture (as I don't have this species at the moment) but look, it has a horn.
>>
>>557488752
In captivity? Eat, shit and sit around. Like almost all animals that are kept in a cage.

Spiders in particular don't really get anything out of human interaction.
>>
>>557473584
8/10 he looks happy as fuck
>>
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>>557488752
Pretty much.

They're basically pet rocks that eat.
>>
>>557488818
A horned spider. What will science come up with next?

Also, you got some form of account I could add on a messaging whateverthefuck? Would like to keep in contact.
>>
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>>557488841
They do exactly that in the wild.
>>
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>>557488951
My skype is vlad.plasmius1

(inb4 spam)
>>
>>557489006
Fair point.
>>
holy fuck
so scared of spiders!!!

dont know why...but looks so scary
>>
>>557488804
touché, of course i lurk on /b/ all day, what else
>>
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>>557489269
How does it feel to be less productive than a spider.
>>
>>557486646
>Baton Pass
>mfw
>>
>>557488885
Those would be the scorpions that lurked at my former place of residence.We also had the black kind.What are called?The only name I have for them is "fucking assholes"
>>
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>>557489935
Buthus atlantis.

There's a lot of black scorpions, you know, like thousands of them.
>>
>>557489845
>those butterflies
You realize that they're literally drinking the tears of that turtle, right?
http://news.discovery.com/animals/insects/tear-drinkers-love-when-animals-cry-140501.htm

Hell, some have been known to gouge the eyes of an animal with their probiscus to make them /cry more/.
>>
>>557490146
Assaulted by butterflies.

I often feel the same way.
>>
>>557490225
Do you have women problems anon?
>>
>>557489845
Spider doesn't even lurk be /b/ro ^^

btw i was just curious not trying to piss anybody off
>>
>>557490401
I dislike butterflies. I love moths, though.
>>
>>557490143
The ones I'm talking about look like ole Buthus Atlantis there,except for they're black.The probably describes a shit ton of scorpions,best I got though.
>>
>>557473584
cool/10
>>
>>557475802
fucken comfy asz turtel
>>
>>557490146
Probably just the algea.
>>557490582
I had moths once, never again, they completely wreck themselves within days.

I'm cooking lasagne by the way, might reply late or not at all.
>>
>>557491303
It's been cool Op,nice talkin to yah.
Enjoy your Italian cuisine.
>>
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this is my baby gummy worm, her name is Charlottle but i just call her snek
>>
>>557492346
Charlotte*
>>
>>557492346
There's a town called Sneek. Belgium I think.
>>
>>557492972
Netherlands.
>>
This was a good thread, thanks OP for all the information and opinions.

I was going to buy a bearded dragon one time, but then I realized I didn't know shit about the species or how to care for it, I just wanted one because they looked cool and had the word dragon in it's name.
>>
>>557493163
Thanks.
>>
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>>557492972
>>557493163
off to the Netherlands she goes where she belongs
>>
>>557493365
Snek is also what snails are called in some parts of germany.
>>
>>557492346
i used to have the exact same snake as that.

not anymore :(
>>
>>557493821
It went to snakeworld, right?

RIGHT?
>>
>>557493924
sucked him up with my vaccumm :s
>>
>>557493821
WHAT DID YOU DO
>>
>>557494168
You're kidding, right?
And even if you didn't why didn't you just open the damn thing?
>>
>>557482668
gonna start saving, my friend. I want a reptile generally, my room's always decked out with shit-tonnes of plants as is
>>
>>557494168
no...
Thread posts: 197
Thread images: 58


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