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New Joe the King scorpion thread! We're space programming

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 335
Thread images: 98

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New Joe the King scorpion thread!
We're space programming him!
Get in here!!!
>>
Fuck yes, you are based OP
>>
Bump, ready for launch op
>>
Guys the balloon isn't working
>>
cmon faggot lets do it
>>
Old thread
>>554222818
>>
>>554240050
SEND HIM TO VALHALLA
>>
>>554240050
Go to a store and buy a pack of balloons.
>>
I think I'm going to wait, keep him alive, and just buy some balloons. This isn't working.
>>
>>554240050
YOU MUST DO THIS!!
>>
>>554240050
Are you op from old thread?
>>
>>554240274
he needs helium!
>>
>>554240246
> thinking you can kill JOE THE KING
>>
All hail Joe, the scorpion king! The Earth's ambassador to the stars!
>>
>>554240274

I would, but all the shit stores around me are closed and don't sell balloons.
>>
>>554240359
FUCK WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT I SHALL KILL MYSELF FOR THINKING SUCH STUPID THOUGHTS
>>
>>554240050
Fuck it, are you an American? Go buy some bottle rockets, tape them together. Then glue wings on them to stabilize them. Find one of those old vending machines that give you a prize in a plastic ball thing. Put him in the ball, glue the ball to the top. Presto, we have a scorpion in space!
>>
>>554240493
Kill yourself. You're not good enough to be Joes servant.
>>
U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!! U-S-A!!
>>
>>554240493
use condoms?
>>
>>554239528
Everyone must listen to King Joe's theme song as we prepare to send King Joe into space, thanks to Based OP.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nr2_IjGKEDw
>>
JOE HAS SPOKEN.
HE WISHES US TO WAIT UNTIL OP CAN GET SOME HWLIUM BALLOONS
>>
>>554240942
Are you sure it isn't this?: http://youtu.be/JGw8DWctAts
>>
>>554240756
>>>554240493
>Then you must be sacrificed by Joe's string of death.
y u delete?
>>
>>554241005
Yes sir based joe
>>
>>554241005
GOD SPEED!!!
>>
http://www.ehow.com/how_12019168_build-tiny-hot-air-ballon.html
>>
>>554241237
I did not.
>>
>>554241237
I did. Misspelled sting and didn't want to be shit on.
>>
>>554241352
Gonna try this.
>>
>>554241227
Guile's theme is appropriate for every occasion...
I believe you are correct in your statement good sir.
>>
JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE
>>
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>>554241692
i need this to happen. you are my only shot to save this week, OP
>>
>>554239528
how is the building of the ship going?
>>
>>554242141
Attach this to a shoebox. Build him a little command module in it
>>
>>554242316
Started over
>>
>>554240246
>>554240050
PLS OP
>>
>>554242584
then add more boosters
>>
unrelated question

does King Joe like bukkake?
>>
>>554242668
do you by chance play ksp
>>
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>>554240246
VALHALLA-BOUND
>JOE, THE SPACE SCORPION KING OF VALHALLA
>>
>>554242141
Wow, what are the chances of someone missing an arm and someone with a freakishly long arm working in the same store?
>>
>>554242141
Do one like this one. Use a big black garbage bag, like the ones used for corpses, for the fuel a corny(eaten) or line thread with kitchen oil.
>>
>>554242668
Maybe multiple stage fuel for the balloon? Like some how make it to where when one of the fuel sources gets close to burning out, it lights another fuel source?
>>
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>>554242826
>
>>
>>554242717
Everyone likes bukkake
>>
I saw space program
Am I too late?
>>
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>>554243191
>>
>>554243343
its only just beginning /b/rother
>>
>>554243414
What game is this?
>>
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>>554243414
my dicks is diamonds
>>
>>554243539
Oh yes, I don't feel sleepy anymore
>>
>>554243582
9gag adventures
>>
>>554243582
skyrim 5
>>
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>>554243582
A shit one.
>>
>>554243582
kerbal space program
>>
>>554242624
For fucks sake this isn't working.


Seriously, I'm just going to go buy balloons later. Sorry guys. Keep a look out for a new thread in few days.
>>
>>554241005
I like that even his thoughts have punctuation
>>
>>554243582
minecraft
>>
>>554243582
Darude - Sandstorm
>>
>>554243582
Civilization 5: brave new world expansion
>>
>>554243814
somebody cap this shit so i dont miss it or something
>>
>>554243814
Gonna need a scheduled time and date, OP.
>>
>>554243715
>>554243748
>>554243870
>>554243873
>>554243901
this
>>
>>554243814
don't forget helium
>>
OP look at this, pretty easy to do fast at home.
You can use something else instead of candles.

http://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Mini-Flyable-Hot-Air-Balloon-with-Candles
>>
>>554243980
>>554243814
>>554243980
>>554243814
>>554243980
>>554243814
>>
>>554243582
Battle Toads: Rocket Edition.
>>
>>554243582
kerbal space program
>>
>>554243980
This. Gotta know when to be on the lookout. The entire nation will be watching as King Joe is lifted to the heavens
>>
>>554243980
Oops, not OP.
>>
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>>554243814
NOOOO!!!
IM COMING TO FIND YOU OP!
IM COMMING TO HELP!
>>
>>554243814
I don't care about what anything was DESIGNED to do, I care about what it CAN do.
>>
>>554244092
this is actually a surprisingly accurate description
>>
>>554244292
That guy looks kinda like putin.
>>
>>554244092
ayy lmao
>>
>>554244092
top kek
>>
>>554243582
Shrek-It-Ralph
>>
>>554243582
Mario Kart: Xbox Special Edition
>>
>>554244092
ayy lmao
>>
>>554243814
see
>>554244056
>>
>>554244409
His face, I mean. Disregard his hair and body and... Shit, I gotta sleep.
>>
What kind of scorpion is this.
>>
>>554244594
Why don't you end your questions in a question mark.
>>
>>554244594
SILENCE HEATHEN
>>
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This is the best thing I've seen on /b/ in years. God speed, King Joe. God speed
>>
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>>554244456
>>554244541
>>554244541
>>
>>554244826
>Why don't you end your questions in a question mark.
>>
>>554244826
Why should he.
>>
>>554244947
>>554244940
>>554244826
what the fuck is wrong with you guys.
>>
>>554244292
Give me time guys, trying again.
>>
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>>554244541
>saging this thread
>this must be bait...
>>
>>554244594
King Scorpion
>>
>>554245060
What the fuck is wrong with you.
>>
>>554245060
they are on 4chan.
>>
>>554245197
da fuck is wrong with this wrong punctuation ass using pleb>>554245202.
>>
>>554245149
good luck OP
>>
>>554244826
Question marks are for women, dags a children
>>
>>554245149
until this thread dies! I STAND BY YOU SCORPION KING JOE!
>>
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>>554245060
I don't know, what's wrong with you.
>>
>>554245149
GOD SPEED
>>
>tfw scorpion joe gets more bitches than all the men on earth combined
He probably has alien chicks lining up to get a taste of him
>>
>meanwhile
>>
Can we make a wikipedia entry for joe? He can be a new species of scorpion.
>>
>>554244594
Think you mean what kind of King is this
Answer: space scorpion..... Joe to his friends
>>
>>554245604
All hail King Joe! The Space Scorpion Pimp!
>>
OP, apparently scorpions flow when exploded to UV rays. Put him under a black light and have a King Joe rave before take off
>>
Joe is a rocket man.

ROCKET MAN! BURNING OUT HIS FUSE UP HERE.....ALONE!
>>
>>554245740
Then instead of explaining who the almighty joe is, we can just link the page.
>>
>>554245927
>when exploded to UV rays
>>
>>554245987
great idea
>>
>>554245987
Now someone else go do it
>>
>>554246452
anyone saved the pics from last thread?

OP?
>>
>>554245987
good because ive already got plenty of based joe pictures saved
>>
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GOD SPEED KING JOE. YOU WILL REMAIN IN THE HEARTS OF EVERYONE ON /B/ FOREVER. ENJOY YOUR BUXOM SCANDINAVIAN WHORES IN VALHALLA!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFks9A9TCF0
>>
Huh
>>
>>554246721
>>554246645
Maybe you two could help each other
>>
>>554246721
upload it to somewhere, mega, anonfiles whatever
>>
anyone thinks the thread is dying?
time to create another one?
>>
329 post to go
>>
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What do you suppose joe will do in space?
>>
Seriously if this isn't happening lets set a date OP
>>
>>554247636
rule with an iron pincer/stinger
>and alien bitches
>>
>>554247636

Conquer the Universe of course!
>>
>>554247636
Conquer
>>
>>554247636
I don't know. What do space overlord scorpions do in space?
>>
>>554247636
Conquer
>>
>>554247636
Conquer
>>
>>554247727
Balloon is finishes. No idea if it works.
>>
>>554248007
Fuck you
>>
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>>554247636

Have sex with some hot humalien (Half Human,Half Alien) bitches like this one
>>
>>554248171
O dem
>>
>>554248171
YESS
>>
>>554248171
Yes all we need now is a short test
>>
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>>554248171

Oh boy
>>
>>554248171
how gives a fuck if it works. this a space program! if it doesn't work, Joe will live in infamy forever in the lessons learned binder
>>
>>554248171
Test time!
>>
>>554248171
It's happeningggggggg
>>
suggesting installation of an anti-suicide device. scorpions sting their brain at the slightest realization of destruction, aka thinning atmosphere, or heights.
>>
>>554248171
it's happening
>>
>>554248525
Okay guys, we're ready for launch. But.
It's night time.
>>
>>554248732
Do it tomorrow, but at a set date
>>
>>554248732
night launches are a thing
>>
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>>554248732

GUYS,KEEP THE BREAD ALIVE!
>>
>>554248732
stream?
tiny chat com
>>
>>554248732
im quivering with antci....
>>
Joe a day the AEROSPACE STAR GAZER_00107895,7 are ready.
>>
Make him a tiny submarine and send hin down the toilettivedans cressid
>>
FUKIN HYPE
>>
>>554248924
No, mobile dude. And it's dark.
>>
>>554249058
look at that nasty ass room.
>>
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>>554249058
pre flight systems check

power
>go
life support
>go
fuel
>go
balloon
>go
guidence
>go
we are go for launch i repeat go for launch
>>
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>>554249058
LAUNCH IT FAGGOT

>capatcha : space rflmun
>>
>>554249226
we must count from 3 to 0
>>
Shit. I'll be at work by the time you launch tomorrow.

Someone cap the thread tomorrow! I gotta go!

Godspeed, Joe, the scorpion king!
>>
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3
>>
>>554249413
oh shit
3
>>
>>554249193
joe trashed the place
>>
>>554249193
>look at that nasty ass room.
>most is scrap from building ships
shut up faggot
>>
>>554249674
3
>>
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GO FOR LAUNCH
>>
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ALL SYSTEMS GO
>>
>>554249737
GOOOOO
>>
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>>554249737
ITS HAPPENING
>>
>>554249665
How2count
>>
>>554249737
Bye Joe! Godspeed!!!
>>
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>>554249737
>>
>>554249737
THIS IS MAJOR JOE TO GROUND CONTROL
>>
>>554249665
>>554249674
>>554249726
We were supposed to count down
>>
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>>
>>554249737
Moar pics please
>>
>>554249058
Glorious
>>
>>554249737
>tfw listening to space oddity right now
Farewell joe scorpion, our own major tom
>>
>>554249737
did it worked?
I would like to see joe landing in someones head
>>
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>>
>>554249737
The greatest achievement of our lifetime.

Godspeed, Joe.....

Godspeed...
>>
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>>554249058
>>554249737

oh shit, its the empire!
there is no stopping it now!
>>
>>554249737
Don't worry guys, if anyone can fly this thing it's joe.
>>
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>>
>>554249961
Fuck that
>>
>>554249961
what did you expect from /b/?
>>
damn i missed the old thread


GOD SPEED JOE
>>
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We need a report was launch go or no go
>>
I hope it doesn't go the way of the Challenger....
>>
;_;7 Never forget
>7/1/2014
>>
>>554250350
Failure is not an option
>>
>>554250350
i really/dont want to see that.
im rather conflicted
>>
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>>554250350
we don't need this right now, ground control
>>
>>554249737
GOD BLESS THE UNITED STATES OF FUCKING 4CHAN. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Qzb87qir7Cs
>>
i wish i was joe
>>
>>554249737
we need feedback from the launching platform ground control
>>
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Record a video and make it into a gif.
>>
>>554250539
/thread
>>
>>554249945
GODSPEED JOE.
>>
>>554250530
I'm just saying....
We haven't tried the hot air balloon method before. It is untested, maybe unsafe!

AND WE SENT OUR BEST MAN UP IN IT!
>>
>>554250660
This is a small step for Joe, but a great leap for the scorpions!
>>
>>554250565
we all do

>>554250660
i can't believe! this shit really worked?
>>
>>554249665
>>554249674
>>554249726

holy shit

look what the glory of King Joe was able to accomplish

/b/ counted to 3
>>
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Goodbye, my sweet joe. Rule the stars as tou were born to. We will forever be watching the night sky, remembering this day.
>1/7/14
>>
>>554250660
better pics
>>
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>>554250660
GOD SPEED JOE MAY YOU RULE THE HEAVENS ABOVE
>>
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>>554250660
>i waited 2 threads to post this
>>
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>>554250660
God Speed Joe!
You will always be loved!
>>
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>>554250660
JOE CAN INTO SPACE
>>
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>>554249737
>>
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>>554249737
>>
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>>554250660

Replai to these ife u Crai evry tim
>>
>>554250827
Fucking Kek'd when they were supposed to countdown
>>
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I'll see you soon, joe.
>>
>>554250660
>>
we have done it /b/ros Joe is on ascent to the heavens
>>
>>554250660
ALL HAIL THE KING
GODSPEED
>>
>>554250891
good one
>>
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>>554250660
Let the light carry King Joe to the sun, where he will reign in glorious incandescence
>>
No video OP?
>>
This was so successful that I shit muhself
>>
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>>554250660

Gentlemen, I'd like to thank you all, and most importantly OP, for bringing about one of the most legendary threads on /b/ in years.

It's threads like these that keep me coming here.
>>
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JOEEEE
>>
>>554250660

You have my respects joe
>>
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Watch joe get fucking captured by aliens thinking he's from another planet like then and use their advanced technology to turn him into a super intelligent 6ft morphoscorpion that will come back with the other scorpion life forms and fuck us all by launching us into space. Highly unlikely though, Our hero will likely accomplish a fantastic orbit very high in the atmosphere then return in a rather dramatic crash landing somewhere in the ocean or luckily on land. Or a plan fucking hits him. Shit im so high while browsing this thread that I'm thinking up all the shit our joe could go through. God speed Joe Lightscorpion
>>
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>>554250660
HOUSTON! WE ARE HAVING DIFFICULTIES
>>
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We salute you
>>
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Goobai joe
>>
Hi mom, I am in an epic thread. Geur and peace.
>>
>>554251420
NO JOE THE WHOLE NATION IS COUNTING ON YOU
>>
http://youtu.be/7uTAIpU0sa0

We will see you again, Major Joe. The king of the scorpions!
>>
>>554251420
OH GOD I CANT WATCH
>>
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The legacy of the /b/ space program lives on
>>
>>554251420
WHY WOULD GOD LET THIS HAPPEN?
>>
>>554251420
JOE NOOOOOOOOO
>>
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>>554251420
>>
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>>554251420
JOOOEEE
>>
>>554251420
I WARNED THEM OF THE DANGERS!
>>
>>554251420
OH SHIT
>>
>>554251420
IS THIS THE END FOR OUR HERO???
>>
>>554251420
>>554251142
IT NEVER STOPS
>>
remove hit tail 4 weight
>>
>>554251420
ITS BREAKING APART

also 420get
>>
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>>554251420
JOE! MY GOD JOE! NOOOOOOO!
>>
>>554251684
Oh shit. JOE!
>>
>>554251684
FUUUUUCK
>>
>>554240246
lmao
>>
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>>554251420
>>554251420
NO
>>
>>554251420
I-I'm scared mommy, will Joe make it to space?
>>
>>554251684
NNNNNOOOOOOOO

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RY3XiM7oGj0
>>
Gentlemen, A moment of silence for King Joe the Space Scorpion
>>
>>554251684
GOOD LORD MAN GET IN THERE!
>>
>>554251684
IS JOE OK?
>>
>>554251420
shit
it's not going up?
is it to heavy?
is there any leak?
try powering up the fuel
>>
>>554251684
THE LEGEND NEVER DIES?
>>
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>>554251402
a plan most certainly did hit him
>>554251420
CASUALTY REPORT!!!!
>>
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>>554251684
JOE NO!
>>
>>554251684
JOE! HE HAS TO BE ALIVE OP
>>
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>>554251684
JOE! NO NO THIS CAN"T BE
>>
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>>554251684
>>554251684
>>554251684
>>
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>>554251684
This isnt happening. THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING
>>
>>554251684
NO DISPATCH FIRE STAT
>>
>>554251684
The Lord of Light
>>
RIP JOE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wn_iz8z2AGw
>>
>>554251684
I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN! WHY JOE?! WHHHYYYYYYY
>>
>>554251839
tfw
>>
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>>554251684
>>
>>554249034
It is shivering god dammit.
>>
>>554251684
the night /b/ cried
>>
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>>554251684
NOOOOooooOoO
>>
>>554251791
M... Men.. We've recovered what is left of Joe's spacecraft.
>>
>>554252045
NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>>
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>>554251684
...
>>
>>554251684
GET HIM OUT OF THERE
>>
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the challenger blowing up is just a reminder King Joe lives forever
>>
>>554252045
What went wrong? I demand answers. Someone has to pay for this.
>>
>>554252045
But what of joe?
>>
>>554252045
Never let go, Joe. Never let go.
>>
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>>
>>554252045
But... What of Joe
>>
>>554252045
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2WH8mHJnhM
>>
>>554252045
VALHALLA VALHALLA VALHALLA
>>
In fact, I never liked joe. Fat ass cunt.
>>
>>554252045
Where's Joe?
Did he survived?
>>
>>554252045
Viking funeral
>>
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>>554252045
RIP Joe
7-1-2014
Nevar Forget
>>
>>554252045
Science has gone too far
>>
>>554252045
Joe will live on, not just in the heart of /b/, but in the heart of adventurers for generations to come
>>
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GUYS,JOE MAY BE DEAD BUT I AM THINKING WHEN MY DOG GIVES BIRTH,I WILL KEEP ONE OF THEM AND SEND THEM TO THE MOON! PROJECT DOGECOIN IS NOW IN SESSION!
>>
>>554252045
>>
>>554252045
How will we tell his family?

Oh God....Mrs. Joe....and his children!
>>
>>554252045
WHAT ABOUT JOE
>>
>>554242862
A for effort. Gonna submit to creme de la meme so your ID will be etched into the tabletes of le funi maymay history.
>>
>>554252224
Hating Joe won't make your parents love you y'know
>>
>>554252045
Why! why joe! he had family man, his son was counting on him!
>>
>>554252045
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fmPWa7gL8k
HEIL JOE
>>
We must learn from our mistakes /b/ros!
>>
>>554252045
I Will Never Forget you Joe the Scorpion king ;_;7
>mfw
>>
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>>554251684
>>
>>554251967
Beat me to it.

Men, Ten HUT!

Where's his 21 gun salute?
>>
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>>554252224
Shut the fuck up fuckboy, Joe was a god dammed hero
>>
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>>554252125
This day, we have suffered one of the greatest losses in BASED history...
>>
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>>
OP, is there going to be a funeral?
>>
>>554252416
This
>>
>>554252332
I don't hate him. I just don't like him and that's all.
>>
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>>554252134
>>554252134
>>554252134
>>554252134
THE SMOKE LOOKS LIKE A SCORPION.
IT HAS BEEN WRITTEN IN THE STARS FOR YEARS
>>
>>554251684
he new the risk.
he was a great king and will be missed
>>
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I CALL FOR AN INVESTIGATION!!!!
>>
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Guys...

What if joe reached Valhalla?

What if he made it after all?
>>
>>554252489
no not joe NEVER JOE
>>
>>554252489
JOE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
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>>554251420
It can't be over
>>
>>554252489
I'm going to fucking cry OP
Never forget
>>
>>554252416
Always have at least 20 balloons and a large tank of helium at home?
>>
>>554252543
JOESUS FUCKING CHRIST
>>
>>554252045
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=didzxUkrtS0
rip
>>
>>554252468
But... No... This can't be.. It's.. It's...
>>
>>554252489
WE NEED TO SEND GOD SCORPION KING JOE TO VALHALLA ASAP
>>
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>>554252045
Scorpion? Scorpion?! SCORPIOOONN!!!

Oh jesus....oh god...all the blood.
>>
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>>554251420
>>554251684
>>554252045
>>
>>554252613
It's certainly a possibility.
Shall history remember Joe as we wish?
>>
>>554239528
Quick! Check the crew cabin!
>>
>>554250045
>check ignition and may Joe's love be with you
>>
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IDEMAND A VIKING BURIAL FOR JOE
>>
>>554252543
IT WAS A PROPHECY FOR EVENTS TO COME
>>
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>>554252489
>>554252489
>>554252489

WE NEED A REVIVE
>>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fiy9YB1coMw
>>
>>554252134
JOE SURVIVED CHALLENGER ?
>>
>>554252692
oh god. a whole new world of pain and loss opened up in my head.
i miss you so much joe....
>>
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>>554252489
nevur ferget RIP in peese Knig skurpuns
>>
>>554252942
no joe was challenger
>>
DID ANYONE SCREENCAP THIS??????
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nNxpwPMjro
>>
I choose to believe he ascended to a plane of existence that we just can't understand
>>
>>554253046
DIY FAG
>>
Op...i think we need to make a grave
>>
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>mfw Joe escaped the crash and is now planning his own ship design and will go into space and will return in 5 years with a million bitches and advances technology and then give funds to the /b/ space program so that we can send sharks and tigers into space
>>
>>554253173
But I'm on my phone :(
>>
>>554253046
>saved page as:
7-2-2014 the day /b/'s space program went too far
Thread posts: 335
Thread images: 98


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