Archived threads in /asp/ - Alternative Sports & Wrestling - 721. page

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>Ambrose and Sasha Bizarre Adventure


Last Thread
https://archived.moe/asp/thread/2716515/

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>A seven star match isn't possibl-

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>GOTTA MAKE JOE LOOK STRONG !!!

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Japanese Wrestling Stars To Battle For Tag-Team Championship Gold at Slammiversary 15
Pro Wrestling NOAH stars Naomichi Marufuji, Taiji Ishimuri Look To Shine In The Impact Zone

NASHVILLE – GFW/IMPACT Wrestling, a subsidiary of Anthem Sports & Entertainment Corp., announced today that it will bring two superstars from Tokyo-based Pro Wrestling NOAH to participate in Slammiversary 15 on July 2, a live pay-per-view filmed in The Impact Zone on the backlot at Universal Studios Florida.

Naomichi Marufuji and Taiji Ishimori will team up to battle for the GFW/IMPACT Tag-Team Championship belts, now held by the Latin American Xchange (LAX).

El Hijo del Fantasma and Drago, two stars from Lucha Libre AAA in Mexico, also will compete in the 4-way match for the GFW/IMPACT Wrestling Tag-Team Championship. The final participants in the championship match will be Garza Jr., and Laredo Kid, representing Mexico-based The Crash.

Marufuji has competed in multiple promotions during his illustrious career, including New Japan Pro Wrestling, All Japan Pro Wrestling, and Ring of Honor. He is a former three-time GHC Heavyweight Champion, and the only man to win Junior Heavyweight Championships in all three major Japanese promotions.

Ishimori holds the distinction of being the longest-reigning GHC Junior Heavyweight Champion for Pro Wrestling NOAH. He has been wrestling professionally since 2002, is one of the best high-flying wrestlers, and has been a singles and tag-team champion.

"It's an honor to welcome Marufuji and Ishimori to The Impact Zone. I know the fans will be awestruck with what these two can do inside the six-sided ring," said Jeff Jarrett, who is the founder of GFW/IMPACT Wrestling and now serves as the company's Chief Creative Officer.

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Who ready for MOTY?

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>tries to throw a chair in the ring
>shes botches
>it bounces off the ropes and smacks her in her face
>she looks back at the camera and laughs
what did she mean by this?

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...can we all finally agree that Asuka is objectively the greatest female WWE wrestler of all time.

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The Rock: "It doesn't matter if you matter! The only thing that matters is that you understand, you get it straight in your head that at Royal Rumble there ain't no way, and the Rock means NO WAY, you're gonna stop the Rock from becoming WWE champion."

CM Punk: Unlike a lot of people I'm glad you're back. I don't care what your schedule is. I don't care if you work here 16 days a year or 365 days a year. You could be Santa Clause and have his schedule, one day a year. I'd still kick your ass. I don't care how many movies you film every year. I know how hard that schedule probably is, but every time you come back, whenever you decide to grace us with your presence, I'm gonna kick your ass. Because this isn't candy land. I'm like nobody you've ever faced before. You can make fun of the color of my t-shirt and you can talk about pie and you can sing songs and you can rhyme and you can do your tired, lame-ass schtick. I just want you to know that come Royal Rumble, and you have about three weeks to realize this, I'm gonna kick your ass 'cause I'm the best in the world. I'm the best thing going today. I'm the best guy you've ever stepped foot in the ring with. And you need to understand, congratulations, Rock, you just graduated from the kiddie table, but you just bit off more than you can chew. You're playing little league with your little insults and your rhymes and your 'millions and millions' and your finallys. And I'm in the big leagues and I'm swinging for the fence. You need to understand that your little jabs and your insults, it's all kiddie games. You can't leave a mark on the champ's face. Come Royal Rumble, understand, when you step in the ring, your arms are just too short to box with God.

The Rock: Uh..CM Punk You may *tries to remember line* Boxing with god *resorts to childish insults* Cookiepuss, *john cena tier faggotry*

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>The WWE Universe

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Who is the heel and who is the face?

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>The E will die in your lifetime

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>According to The Wrestling Observer Newsletter, Carmella, Nia Jax, and Alexa Bliss are being added to the Total Divas cast. They are replacing Renee Young, Eva Marie and Paige.
dayum

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Since you all love to talk about drawing, which wrestler is the biggest draw of all time?

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WWE women BTFO

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Two days. Only two days remain until NJPW decides to print their footmark firmly on American soil for what promises to be an incredible weekend. Why haven't you made the switch yet, E-drones? Now is as good a time as any to at least take a gander at another product. With the G1 Special shows in America airing LIVE (Saturday night, 8 PM EST on AXS TV and NJPWworld.com/Sunday night, 8 PM EST on NJPWworld.com), watching NJPW has never been easier. Come join us, E-drones, we have great wrestling and incredible characters. Don't worry, we won't tell Kevin Dunn and Vince that you're watching NJPW with us so your jobs aren't at stake. Historically, companies have thrived, feeding off of each other and growing together under the pressure of competition. If you want wrestling to create some sort of buzz, if you want wrestling to be fun and interesting again, you'll watch the G1 shows this weekend. Make the switch, E-drones. Trust me, you will NOT regret it.