Archived threads in /asp/ - Alternative Sports & Wrestling - 2340. page

Yes. It's fucking fake fighting

shawn michaels lost every real fight he was ever in

Lesnar was humiliated by Velasquez and nobody seemed to mind. He was literally trying to run away from him in the octagon

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>I was on a lot—there was no way I couldn't get out of it," he said. "The only thing I could do was eventually go to rehab and try to fix my life again. But I actually beat it on my own. I stayed in my house for about 10 days and didn't leave, and I was able to get through the withdrawal."

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>"I had a talk with WWE," Angle said. "It's confidential. I will not be returning for the [brand extension] draft. Possibly in the future, most likely next year, but that is not a guarantee. It was a loose conversation, but I will be in touch with Triple H [Paul Levesque] in the future."

Liar. Those things would shut down his liver if he took 65 a day for consecutive days.

>>1797590
He's getting fucked in the ass in Hell.

>>1797590
GOAT manlet

>>1797590
Awesome wrestler, had the old-school mentallity of ''If i get hurt, means im doing my job right", got a fucked up brain because of it, Homer Simpsond his family

>>1797474
this guys sucks
that fact he ever okayed the name aron rex mean hes a tacky mofo

>>1797474
He's being exposed as total shit on a weekly basis now, it's pretty hilarious.

>>1797493
What you mean anon? Are his promos shit? Or his matches?

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Yup! I get it every year. I can't wait to start myCareer with my trademark character, "Wonder Boy" Zachary Bacon. He's a super chill dude, pretty much nothing fazes him. He's in a tag team with Baron Corbin, together they're called the Bacon Barons. If I had to describe his in-ring style, I'd say he's tricky tricky tricky tricky.

The mask is a tribute to El Gran Luchadore. The striped jacket is a tribute to Salma Hayek. The red kneepad is a tribute to tacos. Tacos rule.

Mr. Bacon (as he prefers to be addressed) was busy training in the Himalayas for the last few years, so he let Stardust temporarily borrow his theme song, but now he's taken it back.

His finisher is the Canadian Destroyer, except he calls it the Crippler Crossface. He's dyslexic and he gets confused a lot.

The title he wants most is the title to his 1989 Ford Orion, which his ex-wife got in the divorce. That bitch.

His two favorite things in the entire world are cheering for Roman Reigns and watching the classic UPN sitcom "Homeboys in Outer Space."

His dream is to one day become a world champion Ultimate Frisbee player, and he plans to use his WWE career as a stepping stone to break into the sport. He has already starred in five direct-to-DVD WWE films: "Fashionistars", "The Yodel Killer", "Who Broke the Lamp?", "Christmas with Steve Harvey" and "Scooby-Doo and WWE: The Poontang Pie Purloiner."

Someday, when he's saved up enough money, he plans to replace his human legs with extendable metal legs so that he can change all the light bulbs in his house without a stepladder and star in robot porn.

His bucket list consists of the following:

• Help elect the first blind president
• Find out where Alex Trebek lives
• Try eating a monkey
• Beat the dam level on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for the NES
• Steal Alex Trebek's lawn furniture
• Outlive all the bees

Day one as soon as the shop opens

>>1797462
Autism.

so awful

Martin Kirby should wrestle straight when the cameras are turned on.

The comedy schtick is fine for dark matches, where it's kind of cool to see some clowning. But when it's being broadcast, you see the same thing over and over again and it stops being funny. And he is actually a really good wrestler...

>Tune in
>One guy rubs his crotch
>Other guy bites his fingers

The absolute state of anyone who likes this shit.

Who gives a fuck you fucking mark?

HHH won more titles than Rock and Austin combined and he never drew a dime

KO

Roman: WHC x3 TT x1

Seth: WHC x2 US x1 TT x1

Dean: WHC X1 IC x1 US x1

Definitely won't be Dean.

>lmao so random
looks like shit

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>>1797406
CAW?

>>1797406

Have sex.

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Shameless self bump.

>>1797367
gotchu faam.

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL6Uv95WrY-L62bpHr71mlL5RitOvtd0Tl

>>1797374

Thanks bro.
Would the start of this coincide with the start of the other angles currently going on?

Brock wins in a 10 minute 80-20 match.

>Ortoncucks thinking Randy is getting his win back

kek

>>1797361
The snek will bite back, Bork will feel his venom

These look so low budget

Do you think Vince owns the Rhodes name?

what a fucking faggot

>>1797320
Wasn't he a vampire or some shit when he showed up?

>>1797320
>>1797339
he was going to throw her over the edge

>>1797339
Nah but he joined Gangrel and Christian

>>1797309
Feelsbadman.tiff

you look like meek mill

>>1797341
Who?

>>1797292
Kevin Owens ate his lunch again

>Smarky McSmarker, you're taking everything I worked for mother fucker!

What did the Big Dog, Roman Reigns, mean by this?

>>1797298
>Ramen
>working for his push

/asp/ is

>>1797285
No ya mother deciding not to abort ya is

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>>1797290
XD