>"NICE POOL, FAGGOT" How would you handle

tell him to get out

>>2290236
>Crocodile in the swimming pool
PANIC

>>2290236
Give him kiss and invite him to bed so he can pound me with that gator cock.

>>2290237
Will it listen ?

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>>2290237
>"Well alright"

>>2290237
Nice photoshop.

>>2290236
throw live chickens into pool to appease your new pet

Enjoy my new talking lizard.

>>2290239
>>2290247
I won't do that perverted cat.

>>2290249
Lizard can't talk.

>>2290249
You just got rekt at your own game. Obey your master.

>>2290236
add more chlorine desu

>>2290272
Who is this?

>entering the pool when no lifeguard is on duty

I'd ban this irresponsible, rule-breaking reptile from my pool

>>2290336
>>2290336
My bad

303 brit to the head

>>2290236
get 3 marine treble hooks.
tie to automobile.
toss at gator til hooked in 3 places.
drive car to dildo store.
gator is a mess.

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>>2290236

Probably make a catch pole out of some rope and pvc and try and get him out
Wouldnt want poor crocbro's eyes to get fucked up by chlorine

I'd probably let him chill. It's cold, i'm not using that pool right now. He's on vacation. Let him stay

Serious question, is there a specific number you call in Florida when you have a gator or croc on your property?

Like, is there a specific branch of local government that deals with this?

>>2290236
gator burgers, and a new purse and shoes for my wife

>>2290476
Animal control is a county service in most Florida counties

Race it in backstroke. Winner gets the pool

5.56 to the head

just bc i love gators doesnt mean they arent tasty deepfried in good lard

>>2290236
Y-you to.

>>2290476
That looks like a crocodile. That's a bit different than dealing with a gator as crocs are far more aggro towards humans. Make a trail of your neighbor's yap-dogs leading out of your pool.

>>2290476
1800-give me a giant stick to beat this mindless predator with until it gets off my fucking property

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>>2290484

So it's just plain old animal control, huh? There's no specific "Gator Task Force" at the county or city level?

>>2290588
Crocs have been shown to be quite a bit more intelligent than thought. I mean they are still rather primordial beast so they aren't going to be using tools but they can learn pretty quick along having some very basic problem solving skills

Convert it into a gator pond. It's not like I'd use the pool anyway, I can't swim

>>2290236

I got a vepr 12 for Christmas, is dump 25 12 gauge slugs into the pool, see how that meme reptile likes half a pound of lead


Or id embrace my new pet, I'd fence it in and throw it steaks every day

>>2290611
Sometime cops will show up and shoot it.

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Convert it to Islam.
Then convince it to declare jihad on Canada.

>>2291084
Oh shit I had to go look that up because I havent heard of that before now.
Its at the same time amazing and terrifying

>>2291051
underated post

>>2291128
it's also not true.

>birds hang out on sticks
>crocs hunt birds
>crocs hang out under sticks
>HOLY SHIT CROCODIELS ARE USING STICKS AS BAIT!!!!

in much the same way that tigers use tall grass as bait to catch deer, or bears use rivers as bait to catch fish.

Animal behavior 'scientists' are retarded children.

>>2291148
No, it'd be like the tiger grabbing grass to cover itself with or the bear re-routing a river. The crocs are manipulating sticks, not just hanging out around ones that already happen to be there.

>>2290900
It's easy. Shit floats.

>>2291051
Old.

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>>2290242
What happens if you violated a 4chan rule ?

>>2290236
Invite the neighbor kids over.

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one word 50bfg

>>2290236
by not having a pool

>>2290984
Not shooting it in the neck
Not harvesting its skin and meat
Not selling the skin and keeping the head as a trophy
Fuck green text.

>>2293444
Alligator is good eatin' too.

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>>2293222
>50bfg

>>2290236
fire up the grill time to eat some Gator tail and make some gator hide belts and wallets

>>2293667
>that metallic aftertaste
No thanks

I belongs to him now.

>>2290243
that shit happens a lot in florida.