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How to stop feeling sad about past?

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I'm 23yo, I've got a happy life with lots of friends, I'm successful in my studies and in my professional life, but I can't stop thinking about my teenage years, when I was friendless and socially inept. I think about it a lot and cringe when I think of all the mistakes I made and how few people liked me. A while ago, 2 of my old classmates looked me up and started talking shit about me to the people I currently hang out with. How do I stop feeling like a failure at life because of my unhappy past even though I'm now happy?
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>>18604540
Someone once wrote that we spend our lives planning revenge on the high school bully. Adolescence is, by definition, miserable, and just about everyone* has cringing memories that haunt them. So cut yourself some slack - you're perfectly normal - and know that as you build up adult memories of success and happiness, the horrible flashbacks will become less frequent and easier to brush away.

*The exception is those who were successful and happy in high school - the jocks, cool kids, etc - who will spend the rest of their lives realizing that it was all downhill from then.
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Stop feeling sad about the past?...
Well, remember the past is gone. It's not here, it's not now.
Whatever hurt you back then is not accompaning you through every step of your life.

You can just focus on the present, and the past will moveaway, along with the resentment.

There are many practices for this... Meditation is one, it trains you to keep your attention in the present moment.

Reading books about it helps too, like The Power of Now or Awaken the Giant Within.
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>>18604540
Think harder about it. I'm honest. Take some time, and think as hard and deeply as you can about your past, and your actions. Really dissect things in your head, and not just your past actions, but your current thoughts and emotions too, and really dig into yourself. Eventually, you'll hit some bedrock, and have nowhere left to go. The goal isn't to find some deep secret, or make a revelation about yourself, because you're not going to find anything, so don't even try. The goal should be to leave no stone unturned. The things that bother you should be examined closely. Your feelings should be examined closely. What exactly is bothering you? Why? Are you justified in being bothered? Treat it like an internal dialogue. It may take a few days of deliberation to really nail things down. You'll probably find that a lot, if not all, of the things that bother you are silly, and unspectacular.
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>>18604604
>>18605151
The stuff in your past doesn't go away IMHO. It sticks and it conditions your responses to the future.

So I support the >>18605151 post - an examination of all the accumulated crap is very useful and serves to defuse its power to control you. If you can identify the stuff that bothers you, give it a silly name and deny it any control of your life. Sounds odd, but knowing the details of your problems helps you to get a handle on the stuff that bothers you.

If you can afford a bit of therapy, get it.
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>>18604540
Just let it go.
Thread posts: 6
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