Thread replies: 11
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2
File: russell-brand-nail-gun.jpg (242KB, 2784x1848px) Image search:
[Google]
242KB, 2784x1848px
People are social animals. I am not, or have trouble with that. Once people catch a hint about that, or if i go ahead and tell them about my problem, they see me as a dead man walking. Obviously Im a little too honest with things, I forget my place, and don't understand whats appropriate or not. One big mistake I do, is highlight the differences between me and others and not whats common. That quickly develops badly for me. Other things I notice people are quick to lie and bend the truth to make themselves look good at my expense. Usually after establishing crediability with their group. I don't do all these steps, I dont take action. Im only reactive in social situations not thinking about it. But people do that stuff whether they aware of it or not. Obviously I can fight back, but I will become the bad guy almost instantly.
The issue becomes I get dominated, left behind or abused in some way in the work place or even in the family. My sister since a young age has been lying about me to get parents on her side. Since Im only reactive and unaware, as I gotten older, Ive become estranged to my own family. Obviously me being honest and not emotionally intelligent hasnt helped.
Since I have no job prospects, and a family that sabotages me and trying to make me conform to whatever they feel like then to make themselves feel better, Im resisting going insane. I dont know how to turn this around or if I even want to. Getting a good job would help but I cant. I'm actually intelligent and exceled in school, but no teamwork skills and ADHD means I can only excel in school and not out of it. I hate being a stereotype, but virgin too. Since this is so stereotypical, whats the typical solution? Do I just live my life hoping the wind will blow my way?
>>
>Am I a pussy?
yea
>>
>>18527369
>Do I just live my life hoping the wind will blow my way?
Obviously not, that's what you've been doing so far pussy.
>>
So how to change?
>>
>>18527547
So I should be more selfish? It does seem like that's what people do...
>>
File: boldness585.jpg (95KB, 585x426px) Image search:
[Google]
95KB, 585x426px
>>18527913
Standing up for yourself is not selfishness, it's self preservation.
If you are in the right, then standing up for yourself is standing up for righteousness.
>>
>>18528351
Essentially this
OP needs to learn how to relate to people, and how to hold his own
>>
>>18528351
>>18528450
I can stand up for myself. But I'm far too gone to genuinely relate to people. I haven't had a conversation with anyone in years. I try not to let it get me down as I mainly focus on my own interests.
Last time I had a job where the boss didn't like me for something I did on first day, maybe didn't tow the line in the polite way they expect, so she marginalized me until I quit pretty quick. Now that I think about it I could've fought back. The art of fighting back politely I just don't know how to do. Standing up for myself means confrontation, and I dont how that works.
>>
Reading "how to make friends and influence people" should help. Gotta be more assertive and understand how to talk to normies
>>
>>18528351
>>18528450
To give an example. My sister belittled me on my birthday. When I acted upset she laughed, so I told her she's an asshole and just left.
Whenever I treat anyone the way think people like to be treated they take me for a ride, so I can only do things in extremes, either be weak walking matt or look like a giant asshole which is easy since I can't relate to people and anyone can choose to paint me as such if I fight back.
>>
>>18529507
I read that book and many others. I understand the concepts but implementing it is hard. I'm just not culturally in tune with the people around me. No culture or group offers the nuances provided for by the internet. Most people want you to talk about their dogs and kids, be manipulated like that, when I try to do that they see through it. They know I really don't care or it just comes off strange like uncanny valley.
The last time i fought back hard was in college and that was me taking the bait to further embarrass myself. People put me down in subtle ways or using the system against me, but fighting back openly was a death sentence.
Thread posts: 11
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2