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Boyfriend is a miser

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Thread replies: 29
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Boyfriend of 2 years just got a new job that pays well about 4 months ago. But he won't spend any of the money he's earning outside of bills. He always says he has to save for various things like college loans etc. We only go out about once a month and only to something small like dinner or a movie. Looking at our accounts we could afford a nice trip or small vacation but he refuses to indulge me even though I make sure he comes home to a lovely and clean house with home cooked meals every night. How do I tell him that I think he should treat us a little more often? I'm not asking for him to buy me nice things 24/7. I just mean maybe a nice weekend trip to the beach or to a cabin to reward ourselves.
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>>18526998
Get a small part time job and use that money for fun. He's looking after and planning your future.
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>reward ourselves
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>>18527011
not OP but don't think taking care of the house is easy
they apparently split their work and she is doing her part that also deserves a reward every once in a while

>>18526998
make sure he knows that you don't want to spend money pointlessly, but feel like a small vacation for a weekend is in order.
apart from that, I think he's doing a good job, going out is overrated but doing it once every month is often enough if you don't have a cash overflow
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>>18526998
Typical housewife problem
Man earns
wife spends

start a small business and use that to fund your fun

let the man save a bit, hes wise to do so
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>>18527020
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hitc8haEu_g
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>>18526998
Cry. Make him feel guilty. You need attention.
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>>18527027
I'm on my phone and can't watch that tight now. very briefly, what is this about?

>>18527029
don't do this, obviously.
just tell him that you'd like to take a few days off with him, just the two of you
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>consider every purchase in how much of my life I'd have to waste 'earning' it
>a $500 vacation is 25 hours of work, plus the money required to pay the bills during the time spent working, as well as the money girlfriend wastes
>just want to retire as soon as possible

I'll probably break up with her once I have a real job
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>>18527042
>I'm on my phone and can't watch that tight now. very briefly, what is this about?
Being a mother or stay at home wife is ridiculously easy compared to the alternatives.
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The eternal woman, always spending a man's money
>>18527043
I do this all the time. That lunch is an hour of my work, that videogame 3 hours. Makes me not want to spend anything
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>>18527056
Yeah. at some point, spending money pointlessly just becomes painful
>videogame is 3 hours of mindless labor
>plus extra time for taxes
>plus all the bills that have to be paid while earning that 3 hours (plus taxes)

>wife wants to buy a chess set once we have money
>tell her I'd rather not spend money
>she gets upset because apparently saying no means I think she's terrible with money
>she doesn't even know how to play chess

money is only fleeting because retards can't hold onto it
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>>18527055
I don't doubt that being at home childless is easier than working and bringing home the money, but a relationship is, or should be, more than just an exchange of "I can d x and you y"
of course everyone is supposed to do their part, but if they agreed that her part is staying home and taking care of that, then that's their agreement.
now I'm not saying that she should take his money and spend it on whatever she wants to, but spending some time together without having to worry much about anything is actually healthy in a relationship, especially if you can afford it.
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>>18527020
>>18527011
>>18527007
>>18527023

My freelance graphic design and savings supported us for 6 months while he found his perfect dream job. Just because he is making more money than me now dosn't mean I haven't contributd.
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>>18527113
If that's the case then you'd be justified in asking him about your issue but you should wait until you have a cushion saved up again to do anything frivolous.
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>>18527113
How much do you have saved up, op? Please don't lie. You have no reason to lie.
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>>18527128
Why does the amount of money I have saved now matter? Will that justify more misogynistic comments against me?
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I...I do t understand /ADV/ I really don't. I checked it on a whim and.. What?

OP wants to do FUN shit WITH her partner.. And you all say its bad and arguing over how easy being a housewife is so she isn't allowed to want to have fun and "waste" money.

My wife's the same, she's stay at home and she wants to do fun stuff too and op doesn't seem unreasonable enough to suggest savings wiping spending sprees, just something less monotonous than a monthly trip to olive garden. I don't think you fucks realise that life isn't meant to be boring and you're meant to spend time doing things with your partner in a relationship other than gormlessly play videogames because its a "cheap night in".

OP the best advice I can give you is verbalise your frustration in a fun way. My wife does it and honestly I'm probably a bit like your boyfriend but when she wants to do something she suggests it playfully or sexily to get me interested.
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>>18527142
Hey baby *pours whip cream on titties* if you want to suck these titties take me out to Disneyland.
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>>18527172

Lmao.

I was more meaning just fun human being realistic shit. My wife deadpanned me once saying that "we should go camping this weekend and fuck in the woods"

Idk it works for me, and I have a great time while we're out there anyway. Sometimes when your natural disposition is anti-fun its necessary for your partner to prompt you in certain ways.

Maybe its bad or sexist advice idk but we're pretty happy.
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assuming youre making your own money right now: save up and go on a vacation alone, or take a friend or him along. if u want to pay for everything then take him.

if youre not making money: stop cleaning the house every day and find a job so you can take yourself on a trip.

before you do either of these: talk to your bf. tell him you want to take a vacation. tell him all the details like when and where, estimates on how much itll cost and how you plan to pay for it. ask if he wants to go and go from there.
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Best way is to put a portion of the income aside each month, and allocate that money for self indulgence.
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>>18527278
this is sound advice
if you're not already doing it, have some kind of financial plan, but make it so that you will always have some money going towards fun activities or dates.
too many people think that ones you have your girl-/boyfriend, dates aren't that important anymore and you can just continue your life together, but spending some quality time is important if you want to keep your relationship alive
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>>18527132
>Why does the amount of money I have saved now matter? Will that justify more misogynistic comments against me?

yes

>be a woman
>we have $500 in the bank after bills
>boyfriend doesn't even want to spend it on a vacation
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oh my
can't handle the kek
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>>18526998
>Boyfriend is a miser
If he is paying his share of the bills, then you can't really complain.
If you want nice things, you buy them yourself or pay half each.

Explain to him that it feels like he isn't trying to win you over and has gotten comfortable (if that is the case), but you can't just demand he spend money on you if he is saving it.

The funny thing is, most people would kill for a financially responsible partner.
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>>18526998
>reward ourselves
>with debt
If you consider ruined credit at a young age to be a reward, then maybe you should take a personal finance class

Saving young and paying off loans in a timely manner are extremely wise things to do

How about when you want to make a major purchase, like a car or even a house? Will that be feasible without savings?
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>>18527142
Not everyone earns at a rate where they are comfortable taking trips as frequently as they'd like

Especially considering the massive amounts of people who are unemployed or underemployed, I really thought more people would appreciate the merits of saving
Thread posts: 29
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