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I broke a girl's heart with an on and off relationship because

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I broke a girl's heart with an on and off relationship because I didn't know how much she meant to me. Well now she cut me off finally but I'm still trying to reach out to her because I still love her.

She's with a guy that constantly gives her compliments and takes her out to fancy restaurants, despite this guy looking good on the exterior, all I can really surmise from this is that he's trying to get the dick in and that he's failed before, he's had many girlfriends beforehand and is still a virgin from what I'm guessing is dogging them for sex, arguing about it, and then continuing the rebound cycle.

I think it's only a matter of time before she comes back around, we really had something special and I promised her so much, but I can't help but think my approach is fucked. She was my first real relationship, everything else was just for fun with other girls, she's blocked me on every possible thing I can contact her on so her friends are my only mouthpiece.

I've sent her a letter because she loves letters and to get across how ashamed and to apologize for breaking her heart, I'm going to space them out with more time and send more but I don't know if it's futile. This guy is off to college and she won't be able to see him, that I know for sure, but how can I get this girl to understand my perspective and have her forgive me?

Pic related it's her
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>>18523392
You broke her heart and you still want to play games. Realty check yourself dude. Leave her alone.
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>>18523396

I said she was special, I'm done playing games. I wouldn't put as much effort in as I have if she was just some bitch.
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>>18523392
>pic related it's her
Ew. She's uggo and you're a fag, no advice for you.
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>>18523400

Believe what you want.
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>>18523392
Karma came and kicked you in the ass. Now you don't like it and are boohooing about it. You don't love her at all and frankly I am glad she is with someone you despise and think that you are a better person than them. News flash: You aren't.
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>>18523405

I fully accept what I'm getting and I never said I was innocent.
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>>18523398
Yeah right. I don't believe you and understand why she wouldn't. Stop harassing the girl and stay away from her friends.
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>>18523392
He's treating her better than you did. Take this as a lesson learned, and move on.
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>>18523414

What do you not believe? What do I get by lying on an anonymous message board you autismo
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>>18523417

I will if she ends up never coming back around, but this guy is just in it for sex, I'm not delusional it's pretty clear cut.
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>>18523419
Not him, but the reason we don't believe you is because we are old enough to have seen a hundred men like this. YOU might even believe you've changed, but even if you succeed in getting her back, you're going to go and do the same shit you always do.

She wants nothing to do with you. If you love her, the least you can do is respect that.
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>>18523424

The last part I believe. While you can't read my mind and you're not gonna believe my word there's nothing in I can do wait that, but I want to make a commitment and marry this girl, I'm not fucking kidding.
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>>18523410
The only reason you want her back is because she finally doesn't want you. The reason you treated her like shit is to see how much she'll take and that was confirmation she must care for you. She finally hit her limit of abuse and is done. This is surprising to you and why you want your punching bag back. If she were to be foolish enough to take you back it won't take long before you mistreat her again. You are a typical abuser.
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>>18523429

OP here, this sentence was chocked full of autism and I'll now be killing myself.
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>>18523432

I'm not an abuser, no. But I never was in a serious relationship before and I didn't know what I had until it was gone, it's stupid and a rational person would move on but she means more to me, if I wanted a punching bag I could just pick up another chick easily, I have game, I just want her man.
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>>18523429
How old are you? Are you under age 22?
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>>18523440

I'm 18.
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>>18523439
The fact that you don't understand that abuse isn't always physical shows your age, or lack of it. You fucked with her heart and emotions. Now, someone else has your plaything, and you aren't happy about it. You going on about wanting to marry her just means you want her to be yours alone.

>>18523443
It shows. You aren't done growing up, mentally, until your 25. You're just a pup, and have no fucking clue what you want out of life.
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>>18523446

No you're right I'm not a matured person, I still have a lot to learn, but I'll never find someone like her again and I can't say anything to convince you my intentions are pure.
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>>18523448
It doesn't matter if they are. She's done with you. If you love her, respect her wishes. If you're unwilling to do that, then you don't love her as a person, but as your thing, which is completely selfish.

Take this as a life lesson. Most men have these, and will wind up with a girl that he loves, but is only with because the first girl won't be with him.
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>>18523455

I've heard what you're saying before and I've gotten through my grief already. I've accepted this as a loss I'm just not turning the page yet because I was selfish and I want to prove to her I can be selfless.
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>>18523457
>I've accepted this as a loss

No you haven't
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>>18523457
You might be hearing, but you aren't listening. She isn't responding to you because she is done. Don't show her. Show the next girl.
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>>18523462

Time will tell. And if you're right so be it.
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>>18523461

You can't read my mind, gtfo and larp somewhere else
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>>18523465
What else could she possibly do to prove to you that she's done? She's broken up with you, she's cut you out of her life, she refuses to respond to you, and she's seeing another guy. What else could she possibly do to get that point across?
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>>18523457
By wanting to prove to her you are selfless, you're really trying your hardest to be selfish. If you were truly selfless, you would leave her the fuck alone. Alas, your dumb teenage brain won't let you.
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>>18523468

I insisted she meet me in person if she was sincere and she did, she couldn't look me on the eyes when she said she was done and that tells me she's on the rebound.
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>>18523472
Ok. So what will it take for you to believe her?
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>>18523392
If she's happier this way, leave her be. It'll hurt, trust me, I've been through this situation. But be happy that she's happy.
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>>18523471

I'm not harassing her dude, I know where she lives and I'm giving her distance out of respect, please make sure you know what you're talking about before you sound like a retard.
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>>18523472
Or maybe you hurt her so bad she can't stand the sight of you? Come on man, we can twist this just as much as you can.
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>>18523473

For her to look me in the eyes and tell me she never wants to see me again and that she hates my guts and the ground I walk on. There was no finality to the meeting, it doesn't make sense but it just felt fake.
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>>18523475

That's what I've written in my letter to her, I do want her to be happy and I'm prepared to let her go, but this guy is not a better man, if he was I would let go, because her happiness comes before mine, that's what I've decided.
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>>18523477
I'm talking about your intentions nimrod. If you contact her again, you're just jamming the knife deeper. Let it go.
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>>18523483
She met you, like you requested, and because she couldn't bring herself to look into the eyes of the person that fucked with her so hard, you just moved the goal posts to that.

Seriously, as someone who has been through this with a person just like you, I sincerely hope you get hit by a bus and die, so that she can have a chance to move on without you constantly nagging her.
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>>18523491
Okay, but what makes you think he's not a good person?
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>>18523478

You may be right, but it was a complex and fucked up relationship and I don't think a relationship like that can end so cut and dry.
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>>18523498
It can and does every single day.
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>>18523496

He's broken up with all his previous girlfriends, he's still a virgin, I may just be filling in gaps because I don't know him through and through but that tells me he has been trying hard for sex and has failed to get it. My ex is a sweet girl and people think she is easy, this guy is rich on Daddy's money and takes her out in dates every day, constantly calls her perfect in the FIRST week of dating. He has ADHD, bi-polar disorder and anger issues, he almost crashed his car with her in it. I may be a piece of shit, but this guy is fucking crazy.
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>>18523498
>The world doesn't act like I think it should! Therefore I will make my life miserable, as well as the woman I supposedly love!
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>>18523507
If he's still a virgin and has had girlfriends in the past, why in the fuck do you think he's just looking to get his dick wet? You go around accusing us of not being able to read your mind, yet here you are doing the exact same thing to him.

Some orbiter that wouldn't take no for an answer told my wife that I was just looking to get my dick wet with her, too. Guess how that worked out? Hint: she's my wife.
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>>18523510

That's only half of my problem with him and it's probably me filling in the gaps. Those other things are serious issues that you can't deny.
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>>18523513
They aren't your issues. If she knows about them, and consents to dealing with them, then its her issue, not yours.
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>>18523518

Yeah right I'm stone cold after all.

I suppose she'll probably realize it and dump him, but my post was about regaining her trust which looks to be an impossible feat.
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>>18523520
And who do you have to blame for that?
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>>18523529

Myself.

I told you I know where I fucked up, I know why I did it and that it's not gonna a happen again, to her or another girl.

I never said I was innocent and it was never the point of the thread.
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>>18523532
Then own the consequences of your mistake.
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>>18523538

I will.

I threw my pride away a long time ago and I'll try to get her back even if I look like a fool, if it wasn't meant to be then it won't happen.
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>>18523520

I think you've highlighted the most important thing here, without the help of other anons. You've broken her trust and even in the event that she does care about you and would consider dating you again, you've already destroyed the trust which is a necessity in any relationship.

Earning back someones trust is impossible. You can forgive somebody who has wronged you, but you will always be looking for signs that they will do it again. You can't really enjoy a relationship like that, always looking over your shoulder and worrying that you're going to get hurt again.

She has moved on and is with somebody who she wants to be with. By remaining in her life and asking her questions (which you have no right to ask her) you are subconsciously manipulating her into justifying her decisions, which she doesn't have to do. You made the decision to treat her the way you did, she has responded to that and made her choices. You would be better off cutting your losses, moving on and working towards changing your behaviour so it doesn't happen again.
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>>18523543
>"I will"
>He then proceeds to do the exact OPPOSITE of owning his mistake.

I swear to Christ, it's like I'm trying to talk to a 4 year old who just hit someone in the face as to why he's in trouble, and he keeps saying, "Ok. I'm sorry. Can I have a cookie?"

You might be hearing, but you aren't LISTENING.
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>>18523544

I think you're right but I don't want to bank someone I'm prepared to spend my life with on a stranger's word alone, I'll definitely take what you just said to heart but she is worth making me look like a fucking idiot.
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>>18523555

Aight.

Trips witnessed.
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>>18523562
Somehow, I still doubt you plan to let her go. Whatever. Make her hate you more, and run into another man's arms and hold on even tighter, just to prove you wrong, even if it is just out of spite. I just hope he's the best thing that ever happens to her.
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>>18523569

I hope he somehow proves me wrong too lol, but she went out with the first guy that gave her attention after cutting things off with me so you could imagine why I'm having a hard time believing that.
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>>18523578
Did you stalk her? If not, how do you know that it was the first guy who gave her attention?
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>>18523581

Even when we weren't in a relationship we still kept in contact, she was my best friend.

She got drunk at a party and that's where she met him, she talked to him a week before getting rid of me and that's where it began.
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>>18523587
So, then, you're wrong. She didn't go for the first guy that gave her attention after cutting things off. She was with you, and decided that he was better than you, and dumped you.

Two different situations.
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>>18523591

She started this when I was on a trip over 400 miles away, so it's not like I was able to defend myself.
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Guys, lets just let OP be and have him make a thread a week or two later asking how to ruin his ex's new relationship. Faggot is too far up his own ass to realize the girl got tired of his shit.
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>>18523595
So? She knew you well enough to where you shouldn't need a defense. If some random chick hit on you while you were on a trip, and tried to convince you to break up with someone you loved. would they have any success?

She's not an object. She has her own thoughts and feelings. He may have showed her how bad she was being treated by treating her well, but it still took you being an asshole in the first place for it to work.
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>>18523600

No, I was going to go back home and ask her on a date ironically enough when this happened, I'm not interested in any other woman.
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>>18523610
See? She wouldn't need to be there to defend herself from a chick that came on to you. You need to deal with the fact that you fucked up, and leave her alone. If you want ANY chance of ever having a future with her, you are gonna start by respecting her wishes. Ignoring them will only doom you.
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>>18523616

You are absolutely correct, if I didn't say it before I will not force her hand, I'm only sending her these letters to apologize and clear things up and then I'm leaving her to her own devices.
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>>18523466
You're the type of guy who can't tell when it is over. It is over and it is quite easy to read a mind of a sore loser. Get over it and quit obsessing over the chick you treated like shit.
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File: 1468966906475.png (365KB, 500x500px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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Skimmed through and everyone should just abandon thread.

OP is so delusional that he won't take any opinion that isn't his own and is so stuck in his own reality that any sound advice is taken as a threat in his eyes.

politely saged.
Thread posts: 67
Thread images: 2


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