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My girlfriend of 6 years wants to be a man. This has been a low key issue her whole life, but lately it's been made worse by her recent friendship with two teenage trans lovers. She was abused at a very young age and the effects of the trauma have been... many. Among them, she's very fascinated by teenagers and tries hard to recapture her lost childhood by living vicariously through them.
She doesn't want to come out, but she can't make peace with her demons either. This is all she can think about anymore. Sometimes she lies awake at night crying. Nothing I say or do seems to help. Frankly, I don't know if I *want* to help anymore.
This has been going on for so long, and it's been so draining on both of us, and there's no sign of it ever stopping. I love her so much but this has consumed my life entirely. I do nothing but work, come home, and talk to her about her anxieties.
I wouldn't feel justified leaving her because of something she can't control. But what else can I do?
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>>18518088
>I wouldn't feel justified leaving her because of something she can't control. But what else can I do?
Shit bro you got your own life to think about as well. She can do whatever she wants, but you're not obliged at all to be okay with anything. If it's too much, it's too much. Tell her either something has got to change (whatever that is, is for you to decide) or you're out. Don't be (passive-)aggressive about it, it's just the way it is. If it doesn't work out, that's okay too.
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>>18518098
I guess that's what it comes down to. But I dunno if I can live with myself having done something like that to someone in need. Especially considering the effect it might have on her already fragile psyche.
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>>18518119
If she's entirely dependent on you, you're not in a healthy relationship. And you can't sacrifice your own life and dreams because of that. She HAS to get her shit sorted. You can help her, but if things don't get better after a while, man, you just owe it to yourself to search happiness elsewhere.
My honest opinion - and I'm not trying to be harsh - is that you stayed way too long with her already, which only made things worse.
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>>18518138
You're not wrong. We're the only people in each other's lives (with the exception of her friends online) so the prospect of breaking up is that much more terrifying.
We're also both broken in way that are likely not ever going to get better. She's seen me through a lot of my own shit. The idea of leaving her makes me feel like I'm never going to meet another person who will understand me the same way. But I guess that's a textbook example of how codependency clouds your judgment, isn't it?
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>>18518088
>I wouldn't feel justified leaving her because of something she can't control
You can control your attraction either. You're attracted to females. She wants to be a male. This is going to be a problem, no matter how much SJWs want to normalize it.
You can still help her and be friends with her obviously. You don't have to stop showing support and helping. But this clearly is beyond your help and, even if it was, she wants help to become something you're not attracted to
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>>18518088
You're not obligated to be her therapist, you're not paid for it and you didn't sign up for it. Just leave if it's bringing you down.
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>>18518088
Your girlfriend is trans.
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cut your losses and move on. the sooner you do, the less painful it will be. also, you want to have kids some day? they'll need a stable mom. not fair to make children with a crazy mom.
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>>18518088
Your GF sounds more mentally troubled rather than gender-dismorphic. She needs to see a psychotherapist to iron out her fixations.
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