how can i be a more sensual/sexual woman? it used to come naturally,

>>18513842
just show more clavage

>>18513900
how can i pull that off without risking my reputation?

>>18513842
>i feel like i somehow lost it.

you got fat

>>18513842

What did you lose? Maybe it's not you, but the people around you. Did you recently change jobs or have you gotten out of uni?

>>18513926
i dont said be a slut, just show alittle bit clavage its normal even for muslim countries belive me

>>18513927
if anything i lost some.

>>18513933
i think it was easy to feel sensual and sexual when i still was in school, since there i had opportunities for light banter and flirting every day. when i was single, i also had no problems feeling desireable. i know it´s pathetic and i´m probably just suffering the age old issue of an attentionwhore trying to not rely on validation anymore.
what i´m looking for is not losing this sensual side of me, i like it very much and i feel like something would dry up if i let it slip completely. i don´t like the idea of drying up in any way.

>>18513934
i have pretty big boobs. i used to flaunt them as a teen. but someday i realized that that´s slutty and i started to cover up. now i feel extremely unconfortable with cleavage. if i wear a bit of cleavage, i can feel the stares and the silent judgement. should i just not give a fuck?

>>18513995
>i´m probably just suffering the age old issue of an attentionwhore trying to not rely on validation anymore.

Maybe you are dealing with more mature people now. As you grow older, you'll see teen shit becomes tacky. You can still be sexy but:

a) find a mature way to do it and

b) get a personality beyond it, too.

>>18514012
i guess i never learned to propperly be sexy in a mature way. how does that work?
i have a personality, that´s why i got by without the attentionwhoring for about 10 years. i could also go on like this infinitely, but somehow it saddens me to not have that spark anymore. i miss it.

>>18514020

How were you sexy before and why doesn't it work anymore?

>>18514026
because it was the way of a teenager and is inappropriate now.
i mean, i was always a cute girl and i knew excatly how to flaunt that. i also always was bubbly and loved to flirt and banter. if i wanted to, i could easily be the center of attention. i could still do that, but not the attention i would get for that would probably be distain.

i fi imagine a mature but sensual woman, i see her at a dinner party, in an modest but flattering dress, being vibrant and magnetic without putting in visible effort. honestly, she wouldn´t use cleavage. she might have a stunning exterior, but it´s not what makes her so inviting.
that´s what i would want. but i never go to elegant dinner parties, so yeah

>>18514049

You are like the dudes trying to imitate James Bond in their adult lives. It's silly.

For teenagers, flirting with classmates is easy. With coworkers as an adult, though? YOu can already notice the problem.

You can't expect to have guys drool over you as they did in HS because it just isn't cool anymore. You can't expect to act silly and loud and have guys like that too much.

Instead of looking at women in movies, look at women around tyou and see what they do.

>>18514063
kek, that´s true.
i don´t expect guys to drool over me, that would be silly. i don´t even care about the attention. i just loved how it felt to be so confident. like you´re invincible.

i look at women around me. infact, studying the people i´m with is some kind of hobby of mine.

They are either dried up or obscene. i have never really met a woman who pulled of what i am looking for. And i don´t wander in very bad social circles.

>>18514090
>i just loved how it felt to be so confident. like you´re invincible.

Teenagers feel invincible. They are not.

>They are either dried up or obscene.

Well, maybe your stadards are not realistic. When did you meet that sophisticated woman you want to imitate?

>>18514093
ofc they are not. nobody is. but isn´t it sad that adults can´t feel that way anymore? it felt really good.

why should i have low standarts for myself?
i have never met that woman, she´s a product of my fantasy. she´s the opposite of everything that i don´t want to be.

>>18513842
I think it just has to do with confidence. I've kinda lost mine too as I enter my late 20's. I think my mind has just been clouded with stress and I'm not stepping back to appreciate myself.

I've been doing some self-love activities:

-working out and eating healthy
-having hobbies
-skin care routines and hair care routines (this somehow makes me feel pretty as fuck)
-buying clothes that make me feel good
-pushing myself to be kind to others even when I dont want to.

I think when all these things come together, I feel really good about myself.

>>18514097

Growing up means chaging. You will never be 15 again.

Chasing dreams and illusions is the best way to disappoint yourself. You can fabricate a goal in your mind and the expect reality to deliver. Sometimes it's impossible.

idk how old are you?
dance?
post sexy pics on social media?

>>18514097
>>18514102

Shit! You CAN'T fabricate a goal and expect life to deliver. CAN'T!

>>18513842
dont be whore, go to church heathen

>>18514102
does growing up also mean not enjoying yourself anymore? i don´t know if i´m ready to just accept that...

so what´s your advice? have no goals? if you have nothing to push yourself towards, then what do you do with your life?

>>18514104
i´m 29.
no.
i don´t have social media.

>>18514110
i did that. it made me feel asexual.

>>18514101
i´ve been doing some of those things too, lately.
i´ve been stressed out of my mind the last few months, or probably years. maybe that has to do with it. i also made sure to take better care of myself again. but somehow pampering myself now feels like a chore instead of something enjoyable. i don´t know where the enjoyment of soaking in the tub lazily, doing my hair just because and indulging in a new, heavenly scented bodylotion went. probably out the door when stress entered.
how did you get that back?

>>18514117
>does growing up also mean not enjoying yourself anymore?

Never said that, you have to enjoy yourself. Just not in the same way. You can no longer come home puffing and expect mom to clean up after you. A job is not the same as school. Life changes. You change with it. THe longer you hold unto a moment that's over, the more unhappy you'll be. Find new reasons and ways to be happy, don't try to replicate what is over.

>have no goals?

Have REALISTIC goals. Look at real people instead of building a perfect imagine in yourhead. You'll never be as good as that image because it's not real. You are. Compare yourself to real people.

>>18514117
you seem generally jaded and older
i suggest drugs

>>18514121
i´m not trying to replicate it. i just don´t know how to replace it since i´ve never encountered a good adult counterpart to it irl.

sure. but they are no competition. if i would compare myself to them then i would be able to sit back and do nothing. but i want improvement, not stagnation.

>>18514124
how so?
no thanks

>>18514127

Are you looking down on literally EVERY woman you know? That's so arrogant.

>>18514117
>how did you get that back?
Idk, I just kept trying new things. If I didn't see results from the pampering, it does feel like a chore. I set aside every sunday morning to pamper. It's when I do my weekly skin masks and deep condition my hair. My sister and I started talking about korean beauty products and she bought me a set for my bday. I live by that stuff now. It always makes me feel good. I throw on some of my favortie music, drink my good coffee, and just use this time to not stress.

I get discouraged sometimes with working out. But I still do it even when it feels like a chore. Because when I start noticing my butt is lifting or my calves are starting to look good again after a few weeks, it feels all worth it.

I notice when I talk to my friends or my mom or my sister about all this stuff, it makes me feel better too.

>>18514101
Sounds like your looks are starting to fade. Just deal with it.
It's all downhill after 30. Focus less on looking good, and more on your career/hobbies/whatever. You aren't that cute girl anymore.
Hopefully you have a nice personality to fall back on as you descend into old age.

>>18514128
seems like it's deeper than trying to be sexual, like you don't exactly enjoy what other women do for fun/be sexy

what do you tipically do with your girl friends?

Slow your speech, deep eye contact, don't argue or create conflict, be attentive, show interest, and occasionally compliment others. There, sensual.

>>18514090
Sounds to me like you never knew how to do it and were just enjoying the social retardation of young males just deciding they don't believe you have coodies anymore.

Sexuality is an art. It's the hint of suggestion ever so fleeting that you're almost not even sure you saw it. It's looking into someone's eyes and making them feel wanted without ever saying a word. It's a dance where you tease at touch but never quite do it.

It's not something taught. It comes with confidence and direction. It doesn't give confidence or direction.

We have to see an image first

Tight yet not revealing clothes.
You're welcome.

>>18513842
Try pole dancing OP! I'm not even trolling. It will get your mojo back.

>>18513995
thats not slutty just do what i say

>>18514485
thats very well said
somen women are just woman, i cant help but want to put my willy in them while they havent done anything nor have any special features, they are just woman, instead of females