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Depression I guess

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Hi anons. I can't seem to enjoy anything as of late. No will to keep studying though I'm almost done with university. No dreams for the future, no grand projects, no idea what to do for a living. Hanging out with friends almost hurts after a while. Beer and the such make everything worse. Hate myself. Lately every night I end up thinking of a way to end it all.

Everyone I talk to about this says "It's all in your head Anon you can get better" but it hasn't. Had periods like these for years now. Am tired. I escape my responsibilities by playing videogames more and more and when I stop it only hurts more until I go back.

What should I do? I've no idea anymore. Anyone had similar experiences? Because I don't know who to turn to right now.

Also sorry in advance if this isn't relevant to the sub or breaks any rule. I just had to get it out.
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i am waiting for my dog to die so i could finally kill myself and be done with life. there's no cure for this crushing emptiness. i can only distract myself from it with various activities.
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go to a doctor and get medicine for your illness
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I had this issue in my sophmore year of college. I am going back to college to finish my associate's. Continue working on your studies even though it is painful OP. Take some medicine to help out with your schooling as you may have ADD or ADHD.
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>>18442624
Listen, if im honest with you, it seems tough but you just have power through it. No matter what, ending it all is not going to make things better for anyone especially not yourself. Its a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

Get help from a specialist or if that isnt an option, talk it out with someone you trust. It helps to get these things of your chest. A problem shared is a problem halved etc etc
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Don't kill it with medicine.

I was diagnosed with suicide when I was in secondary school. I spent my whole life in despair hating everything around me. Until two years ago, when I moved to a different country and realized something.

Before I came here I had a big problem with my identity. I didn't really know who I was, I just knew that I'm definitely not an interesting person and I'm worthless. But then I moved and started meeting different people from different countries.

I stopped depending on things to be happy. I realized that my actions don't determine who I am - my beliefs and attitude do. I started getting into philosophy and politics. I realized how my personality is dependent on my culture, beliefs, how I was raised. I realized that lack of information and experience were the only reasons why I was so crippled. Basically, I decided to reinvent myself by reading books and doubting my own morals and beliefs. I ended up with a completely different attitude and I don't think that I live in denial - I'm just closer to the truth and I'm happier because of it.

Good luck anon
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